soilem

[soilem]

DP x DC Prompt #16

When Hal had asked him which town he protected, Danny was more than happy to tell him, "Amity Park!" When Hal asked Danny where it was, Danny hadn't thought the response, "At this moment? Or where it was last week?" would've caused such chaos in the meeting.

Danny knew not everyone's town traveled across the country, but he didn't think it was odd enough to warrant this kind of reaction.

#i know this is a ‘town has a will of its own’ kind of thing #but fun fact i guess ‘you went out and came back to nothing’ was a legitimate fear of tiny me #because our fairytales had a common trope of ‘kids left the village without supervision and the village left without them’ #bc you know #most of those fairytales come from a time when people led nomadic lives #but i did not expect a less disturbing kind of dp post to cause me so much subconscious distress #like i felt this forgotten fear in my soul just now

[soilem]

DP x DC Prompt #16

When Hal had asked him which town he protected, Danny was more than happy to tell him, "Amity Park!" When Hal asked Danny where it was, Danny hadn't thought the response, "At this moment? Or where it was last week?" would've caused such chaos in the meeting.

Danny knew not everyone's town traveled across the country, but he didn't think it was odd enough to warrant this kind of reaction.

[soilem]

wait wiat wait are the words polite and politics derived from the same root!???????

i just googled it and heres the answer: no, that’s just a coincidence

here’s polite

and here’s politics

so basically these come from unrelated words meaning strike and city, respectively, that just happened to evolve into similar sounding words with somewhat related meanings

[soilem]

BRIMSTÖVE and ALBINOX, the enchanted eyeballs. Both will be available in my secret patreon shop this Monday. Shipping and price details in my tags 👁 (Going live February 12th, 18:00 GMT / Irish Time, Paypal only) https://www.patreon.com/posts/98193788?utm_campaign=postshare_creator

[soilem]

Highway Home

Jazz and Kyle have a little chat about their brothers after the brothers in question leave the two of them stranded on the freeway and forced to walk home.

Based on the prompts: Jazz and Kyle are stuck wandering the freeway after their brothers show up and steal Kyle's car. [from @camels-pen], and “So how do you feel about the fact that ‘that Fenton kid’ always refers to your little brother, whose infamy has made him far more well-known in the school than you?” ...Maybe Jazz wants some crazy rumors too. [from @dragonsdomain]

Read also on AO3

[Warning for death threats (to siblings), and a creepy guy showing up for a hot minutes, but thankfully Jazz and Kyle aren't stupid]

"Well that just happened," Kyle Weston said flatly as his car drove away with his brother and that Fenton kid inside, apparently chasing after something, although Kyle hadn't seen what.

He looked to his side where the other Fenton kid was standing with her arms crossed, looking only mildly annoyed, given the circumstances. She had been catching a ride with him back from the academic decathlon team victory party—they'd kicked Elmerton Central High's ass, and Jackie Calloway threw a huge party at his fancy house in Polter Heights to celebrate.

The party had been awesome, but Kyle wasn't really a night owl, so when Jazz—the team's MVP—said she was gonna head home early, and then her parents wouldn't pick up the phone, Kyle offered to give her a ride.

Now the two of them were standing on the side of the freeway as it grew steadily colder and darker. Which was... significantly less awesome than hanging out at Jackie Calloway's party.

Even so, the two of them knew their respective brothers well enough that a circumstance such as this was all but expected at this point.

"Guess we're walking home," Jazz said with a sigh.

Kyle groaned, but didn't outright complain as the two started to walk along the side of the freeway toward home. The cars on the road passed them at frighting speeds, throwing gusts of wind their way that did nothing to combat the rapidly cooling evening air.

"At least it's only one more exit," Jazz pointed out optimistically.

That one more exit was over a mile away, and they would have to walk the whole way like this. Kyle hadn't even had the chance to grab his jacket when Wes forced him out of his own car, yelling that it was some kind of emergency.

"Wes doesn't even have his driver's license yet," Kyle grumbled. Wes only had. a learner's permit because he spent all his time screwing around with Danny Fenton instead of doing driving lessons with Dad. "If he wrecks my car, I swear I'll kill him."

"I wonder what all the rush was," Jazz said thoughtfully. "They didn't exactly explain much when they kicked us out. I hope they'll be okay."

Kyle really didn't understand what Wes' deal was with the Fenton kid. It seemed like Wes hated him one day, but they were buddies the next, and then enemies again a week later. He hoped they either made out, or broke up, or whatever needed to happen to make the two of them chill out.

He looked over at Jazz again, and reminded himself for the second time that she was a Fenton kid, too. He wondered if it ever made her self-conscious, that even though she'd been going to Casper High for tree years compared to her brother's one, his reputation was so much more significant than hers.

Sure, pretty much everyone knew Jazz Fenton. Her tutoring list was substantial, so a lot of students even knew her personally, but if they didn't, most still knew of her. Kind, helpful, in line to be valedictorian, highest scorer ever on the CAT exam. But people knew Jazz in the back of their minds, whereas what they knew of her brother was front-and-center. His reputation spread far and wide, so basically everyone in town knew of him.

The passing cars had been too loud to let them carry a conversation, but when there was a lull in traffic, Kyle figured he might as well take the opportunity to ask while it was just the two of them.

"So hey... does it ever, like, bother you that when people say 'that Fenton kid', it always refers to your little brother?" he asked. "I mean like, how does it feel that his infamous reputation has made him way more well-known around school than you are?"

Jazz side eyed him, pulling her cardigan closer around her.

"I'd think of all people, you'd know," she replied. "Aren't you basically in the same situation with Wes? I don't think I've ever heard anyone say 'that Weston kid' and mean you."

"Fair point." He shrugged. "But still, I'm curious. Same situation, different people right. Maybe you feel differently about it than I do."

"Alright, I'll bite," she relented. "But you've gotta tell me your feelings on the matter so we can compare. Otherwise, it's not very scientific."

"Deal," Kyle agreed immediately.

Another car drove passed, and they paused their conversation until the Doppler effect had faded enough for them to be hear.

"So how do you feel about it?" Kyle prompted once it was gone.

Jazz looked into the distance, her lips pursed in consideration, and then she shook her head.

"I don't know really," she said. "I guess mostly I'm just concerned for my brother, you know? What if this reputation he's developed as a weirdo and a troublemaker follows him into college and his future career? What if it prevents him from being able to network with people, and make new friends? But also...."

"Yeah?" Kyle encouraged, sensing that this 'also' was gonna be pretty juicy.

"Well... maybe I want some crazy rumors too, you know?"

A car drove by right as she started to reply, and she had to yell to be heard.

Kyle put on an incredibly satisfied grin at that. He was right. That was a juicy 'also'.

She waited for the noise to fade before continuing.

"I mean, there are people at our school who genuinely, unironically believe that my brother's bladder can predict ghost attacks," she said. "How nuts is that? Your brother swears up and down that Danny is a ghost himself. And ever since all that pirate stuff, the entire freshman class thinks he's some kind of ghost hunting badass, even though he still gets bullied by the football players.

"There are people on the academic decathlon team—some of the smartest, most logical kids in school—who are completely convinced, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Danny is some kind of bad luck charm, because of a series of total coincidences that happened when he sat in on one of our practices. None of them were even remotely his fault, he was just waiting around so I could give him a ride home from school because he sprained his ankle.

"Obviously, I don't want people thinking I'm bad luck, but maybe something just a little weird going around about me would be fun," she finished. "Or make me seem like a little less of a goody-two-shoes at least."

"You want some kind of bad girl reputation?" Kyle teased.

"Well... no," Jazz said, half-shrugging and half nodding. "I like being a goody-two-shoes, but that's not all I am, you know? I can be just as creepy, and badass, and mysterious as Danny can." She punctuated her statement with a pout that was neither creepy, nor badass, nor mysterious.

Kyle shook his head and chuckled.

"To be honest, I don't get what the deal is with our school's obsessive ghost superstition," he said. "I've got a lot of friends online in gaming groups and I've never met anyone as adamant about the existence of ghosts as our classmates at school. I don't know if it's a gimmick, or some cultural thing I missed out on, or what, but it's so over the top."

Jazz laughed out loud, although, for the life of him, he couldn't tell if she was laughing with him or at him. She didn't say anything though.

He knew that she used to be just as much of a staunch skeptic as he was, but at some point in the last year, public opinion on the existence of ghosts had shifted dramatically, and he wasn't sure if her opinion had shifted with it or not. Even if she did believe in ghosts, at least she wasn't as much of a fanatic about it as everyone else was. At least she never spent an hour trying, unsuccessfully, to convince Kyle that ghosts were real.

"Alright, I've said my piece," she told him with a smile like she was humoring him. "Your turn. How do you feel about your brother being so much better-known around school than you are."

"Hmm...."

Kyle thought about it for a moment, his brows furrowed under the edge of his baseball cap. He probably should have thought about it before. It wasn't like he didn't know this was coming.

"I would have to say... I guess I'm like, half annoyed, and half relieved."

"Interesting," Jazz replied. "Elaborate."

Another car drove by, and they both shivered in the wind it blew their way. It was fully dark now, and Kyle was really regretting the fact that he hadn't thought to grab his Jacket when they got stranded.

When the chill passed, and the sound of the engine faded, Kyle chuckled to himself.

"Alright, sure," he allowed. "I'm annoyed because most of the people I talk to, when I mention Wes, they immediately recognize his name, and then they say they didn't even know he had a twin brother. So like, at least people know you exist, even if your brother's more well-known than you are.

"And I'm relieved because have you heard Wes' reputation?" Kyle all but snorted. "People think he's a total nut-case, some kind of raving mad conspiracy theorist. I'm much happier to wallow in anonymity than be the target of constant mockery. He's got such a reputation that people won't even believe him when he says something objectively cool.

"In computer class one time, a girl remarked that she hadn't seen any ducks at the pond in the park lately, and Wes said that was because they migrate south for the winter. Common knowledge, right? Except because it was Wes that said it, she opened a new tab and googled it right in front of him."

Jazz busted up with laughter. "Oh my god, really?"

"I swear to god," Kyle confirmed. "So yeah, if my choice is between obscurity and whatever Wes has got going on, I think I have the better end of the deal, honestly."

"Okay, I can see your point. At least for as wild a reputation as Danny has, his credibility is still pretty high."

"He did get featured in Genius Magazine," he remembered. "Some... gorilla thing, right? That'll boost anybody's credibility."

"Ha! Fair enough, yeah," she agreed. "Somehow, I always forget about that."

"Too bad my brother's just a doofus and not a genius," Kyle joked.

But Jazz didn't laugh at that, only smiled in such a way that was knowing as much as it was amused.

"I don't know," she said, and Kyle didn't like her tone as she said it. It wasn't... mocking exactly, but she spoke as if she knew something he didn't, and that bothered him. "Maybe he's just misunderstood."

"Maybe he's just a pain in the rear," he retorted with a scoff.

Another car came by, but this one slowed when it got close to them.

Kyle saw Jazz tense up, and he put himself between her and the strange vehicle, just in case.

A man leaned out the driver's side window to talk to them. "You kids need a ride?" he asked.

"No thanks," Kyle told him, smiling politely. "We haven't got much farther to go."

"Just the same, it's gettin' late," the man insisted. "I don't like the idea of two kids wandering the highway in the dark for any distance."

"And you like the idea of two kids climbing into a stranger's car any better?" Kyle raised an eyebrow. "If it's all the same to you, we'd rather take a mode of transportation that's guaranteed to get us where we want to go, instead of landing us dead and buried in the woods."

The man scowled. "Is that anyway to talk to a good Samaritan just trying to help?"

"What did you expect?" Jazz pitched. "You're a total stranger trying to pick us up off the side of the road even though we didn't indicate in any way that we were looking for a ride? You can't seriously be worried about us running into a creeper and not realize that you're acting like one, can you?"

Kyle glanced back at her and her thoroughly derisive look, impressed for a moment, before fixing his gaze back on the man, who scowled at the both of them, but pulled his head back in his car and drove off, grumbling the whole time. They waited until the man was a long way down the freeway before they started moving again.

"Damn, you sure told that guy," Kyle commended. "You can be badass."

Jazz flipped her hair for effect and rolled back her shoulders. "I did tell you, didn't I?"

"That you did."

"Now, come on. Our exit's just up ahead, let's take it before another creep drives by that we can only hope takes 'no' for an answer."

"Good call."

Their conversation faded as the two of them started to run ahead to the downtown Amity Park exit where they could finally get off the free way and onto the much safer surface roads.

Once they were back in town, they struck up a conversation about academic decathlon, and the computer camp Kyle went to, and the colleges Jazz had been touring lately as she chose where to apply.

Kyle's apartment was much closer than Jazz's place, but since it was already well after dark, he offered to walk her all the way home if she wanted. She thanked him, but politely declined, assuring him she could handle herself for a few blocks, and it wasn't a dangerous neighborhood. All the same, he asked her to shoot him a text when she got home so he wouldn't have to worry about her, and that, she did agree to.

He was just logging into his favorite online game, about ten minutes later, when the text came in from her, letting Kyle know she hadn't died on the way home.

It turned out Wes wasn't as stupid as Kyle thought he was, because he brought Kyle's car back in the same condition he'd taken it, and he'd even filled the tank. After examining it for scratches and dents, Kyle decided that his brother could live another day.

He asked Wes why he had taken it in the first place, of course. But Wes had replied with a long, convoluted story about the Fenton kid losing his powers and they needed it to chase after some evil, uber powerful ghost. After a couple of minutes, Kyle just cut him off and said he didn't need an elaborate lie and if Wes wanted it kept private so bad, he could just say so.

That, of course, made Wes irrationally angry, which was hilarious, and made the whole ordeal worth it in Kyle's opinion. He got to see his brother seethe, and he had a nice conversation with Jazz Fenton, so all in all, he couldn't even find it in him to be that mad about his car being stolen.

[soilem]

[soilem]

[soilem]

#ajin #i dont remember what i watched after that #i can be death note or attack on titan

[soilem]

Damian reverse Batman himself

It all started when Damian got a new babysitter, Jasmine Fenton. As his father said, he couldn't help as Robin, and the rest of his siblings were too busy being heroes too. 

So he was stuck with a babysitter, Jasmine Fenton, who actually did let him be himself, and he didn't need to hide or cover it up like normally for civilians and similar. 

That was why Damian later reversed Batman himself and left with Jasmine. 

Jazz only noticed she still had Damian with her as she arrived home, and, well, welcome to the family. 

[soilem]

"magic circle but the writer ran out of space" will never not be funny

[soilem]

[soilem]

The default length of pasta is designed to fit on a supermarket shelf, not to be the best length for cooking/eating.

Feel free to break it to any length you want (don't let the Italians know I said this)

[soilem]

[soilem]

i hate when i send someone a meme in another language and they're like "uhm... translate? 😒" fucker i sent you a meme where 90% of the words have an english cognate and/or you don't need to know what they're saying to find it funny. can you at least TRY

[soilem]

An old soft proofing tutorial of mine that I’ve been getting requests to post again.

[soilem]

all goofing aside I genuinely don't understand the urge to reimagine Taylor Allison Swift as a secretly queer icon when the pop music scene(TM) is like. literally overflowing with women who actually like women. Gaga and Kesha and Miley and Halsey are right there. Rina Sawayama and Hayley Kiyoko and Rebecca Black and Kehlani and Victoria Monét and Miya Folick if you're willing to get slightly less top 100. Janelle and Demi for them nonbinary takes on liking girls. like what are we doing here. like I'm not even saying you can't enjoy Taylor but why would you hang all your little gay hopes on her.

[soilem]

Mob 🤝 Danny Phantom

These ghosts won't leave us the fuck alone and we're failing math