#//my chatzy tagging system may call this sad but its really not

[divineluce]

Supply and Demand || Remmy & Luce

Location: White Crest Hospital

Time: July 7th, 2020

Tagging: @whatsin-yourhead & @divineluce

Description: While stopping by to drop off a card for Blanche, Luce runs into Remmy. There are no feelings in Ba Sing Se.

Warnings: NSFW (implied sex, kissing)

“Yep, adopted sister. I was in here a couple weeks ago, she’s in here now-- family, what can ya do?” Luce said as she barreled past the front desk and began to head down the hallway towards Blanche’s room. She’d been here less than twenty-four hours before, having joined part of the rescue crew in Blanche’s room. The small group had hunkered down in the corner of her room for hours, watching over her. Luce had been one of the first to leave. She had been weary, filthy, smelling of chemical smoke and black blood-- all she’d wanted was a shower and her bed. Now that was taken care of, she was determined to stay by Blanche’s side. Luce had told her, she’d warned her against coming along. But, she was stubborn and far too brave for her own good. That said, Luce couldn’t begrudge her that. She wanted to make sure her best friends were safe. Slipping inside Blanche’s room, Luce glanced at the hospital bed and saw that the other girl was fast asleep. Looking around, her eyes fell on Remmy, still sitting where they’d been when she’d left last night. “I was just coming by to see if she was awake. I can head out though, if you just want to spend time with her alone.” She said, prepared to walk back out the door.

It was times like these that Remmy missed being able to sleep the most. Sitting around watching someone they cared about suffer was painful. But every time they closed their eyes, a fear swallowed them. What if they opened their eyes and they were back in that cage? What if everything had just been a dream? And so they’d sat, awake at all hours, in the hospital room. They’d taken a few breaks to wash up, change their clothes, and eat, but mostly they’d stayed near the room or in it. They were just about to start answering old messages on their phone (and apparently needing to apologize to quite a few for the person who had imitated them online), when the door opened and Luce walked in. Remmy felt their muscles relax, not realizing they’d been on alert, but that’s just the way they always were now, wasn’t it? They’d felt like this since that stupid collar was first put on them. It was just what they were used to now. “Oh, n-no, that’s fine,” they said, shaking their head, “you can stay. She’s been asleep for a bit now.”

Shifting her weight from one foot to the other, Luce weighed her options. She didn’t particularly want to be stuck in a room with Blanche and Remmy right now. For one thing, she wasn’t sure how much of what had been said to her over messages last week had been them, how much had been the person impersonating them. For another, she knew how much Blanche meant to them. “I don’t want to bother you guys.” She said with a shrug before holding out the small envelope that she’d brought along with her. “It’s a card. Figured Blanche might like having something nice to look at when she woke up.” Luce said. It was the least she could do to pay back the young woman who had done so much to her family. The card was one of her own design, featuring a mountainside scene, rays of sun, and some wildflowers in the foreground. Luce glanced at Blanche’s form in the bed and shook her head. “I can come back, I don’t want to take up space. I’m sure Nell will want to be around when she wakes up.”

Luce didn’t react the way Remmy had hoped. She’d been out of it in the car and when they’d all been in the waiting room together, and then she’d gone home pretty quickly. Remmy hadn’t had a chance to explain to her that the messages hadn’t been them the past week or so, and now she was already trying to leave again. “Actually, I think I should probably take a little break, too,” they said, standing up, “I was thinking of taking a walk if you um...wanna join me?” they asked, looking at her with an expression that nearly begged her to say yes. They hadn’t seen her since that time in the kitchen and there was so much they wanted to say, wanted to do. They almost felt their arms itching to close around her.

Eyes widening slightly at their words, Luce shrugged. Sure. Sure, Remmy was their own person. If they were taking a break, sure. That was fine. But, the way they were looking at her… there was a desperation in their eyes. And after all they’d been through, after the pain that they’d suffered from-- her eyes flicked to the collar still around their neck-- she didn’t feel right saying no to them. “Yeah. Yeah, sounds good to me.” She said, before heading for the door, keeping herself a couple steps ahead of Remmy. Her heart was pounding but that was probably just a side effect of the phoenix tears, or maybe some lingering thing after her heart attack during the resurrection? Whatever it was, it was fucking annoying. Why was she reacting like this? Why was she acting like this? It was just Remmy. As they exited into the hallways, Luce stuck her hands into the pockets of her shorts, just following Remmy’s lead. “How are you holding up?”

Remmy couldn’t help but smile when Luce agreed. It was surprising how much they’d missed her. They didn’t mind it, but they hadn’t truly realized the ache until they saw her. They’d let themselves get numb inside the cages because there was no other way to get through it. They could still even feel the blood on their hands, sometimes, when their mind would slip and wander and they’d see the cage doors or the arena lights and their body would tense. But they weren’t there anymore. They were safe. And being around people made them feel safer. They looked over at Luce, and felt that ache increase a little more. Her question rang in their head, and they found that they had no desire to answer it. They were doing terrible and it was pretty obvious. So was Nell. They’d been kidnapped and starved and tortured and made to fight against their will-- they were doing horrible. But they didn’t want to talk about it, not even a little bit. Instead, they reached out and took Luce’s hand and tugged her back to them, doing something they’d wanted to since they’d seen Luce looking so pale in her kitchen-- kissing her. One hand wrapping around her neck to pull her closer, a bit rough and hasty in their desperation to feel her again.

When they had been hooking up, Luce could count the times when Remmy had been the one to initiate things on one hand. They’d always tried to make some kind of small talk, beat around the bush, while Luce had only been interested in one thing. So, when they ignored her question and took her by the hand, pulling her into a hard kiss? It caught her off guard. But, not in a bad way. Their hand against her neck felt cool, soothing, even as they pulled her into them with a roughness they seldom used. Luce let them pull her in tight, her hands immediately gripping them with equal fervor. Slightly out of breath, she pulled away for a moment before kissing them with renewed vigor. This was good. This was better than good, it was normal and safe and easy. Just what she wanted. Running a hand through their tangles of their hair, she gripped at them tightly, keeping their body pressed against hers.

Luce’s skin felt warm again, a direct contrast to Remmy’s cool touch. Last time they’d touched her she’d been cold, having just had a heart attack. Having just spent her entire pool of magic to bring back her sister. But they didn’t want to think about that right now. They didn’t want to think about anything. Their mind hadn’t shut off since the first time their face had hit the hard, cold floor of the cell and they were tired of thinking. They’d missed the physical contact of others. And not just in this way, though this was very nice. They craved it. Craved her. Hands finding her back and pulling her closer, kissing her harder, more desperate, as if they could let her know all the things they needed to say sorry for with it. As if they could let her know how much they’d missed her touch with just this one, simple action. As if in the quiet halls of the hospital, they wouldn’t need words. But after a long moment, Remmy pulled away, face flushed, warm with Luce’s body heat. “S-sorry,” they mumbled, “I just...wanted to do that for a while now.”

The feeling of their hands grasping at her, pulling her in even tighter reassured Luce, something she hadn’t even realized she was looking for. But, the fact that Remmy was here, holding her tightly, their lips familiar against her own, it filled her with a sense of relief. Because they were alive. They were safe. And because-- Remmy pulled away, leaving Luce staring at them with an unreadable expression. “Stop apologizing. I clearly didn’t mind.” Just as she was about to grip them once more, pull them in for another deep kiss, she registered their words. “For a while, hm? We’ll just have to fix that.” She said with a raised eyebrow. Luce cast a look around the hallway-- this part of the hospital was surprisingly empty right now. Whatever, she wasn’t going to question that. Grabbing hold of their wrist, Luce hurried down the hall, tugging Remmy along after her. Now where was that door..?

It was perhaps a small relief to hear Luce say that, but a relief all the same. Remmy wasn’t sure she would have missed them as much as they did her. After their last talk, it almost seemed as if Luce didn’t really think of them as much more than someone to fuck, but she’d come to the Ring for them. Well, and Nell, but their point stood. And she was here now, right? She hadn’t walked away. In fact, she was taking their hand and leading them off somewhere down the hall. Remmy glanced behind them, back to Blanche’s door, as if to make sure everything was okay, before looking back forward to Luce. “Where are we going?” they asked, blinking in slight confusion. They didn’t want to be walking around, even if that’s what they’d suggested just two minutes ago-- they wanted to be kissing her. Holding her, touching her. And forgetting about the week they’d spent laying on a damp, bloody floor.

Glancing at the little wall placards by the doors, Luce frowned as she continued down the hall. “There it is.” She said, more to herself than to Remmy and pulled open a door. She’d only known that this particular door would be open because of her own stay in the hospital-- over the sound of Nell muttering into her phone, she’d heard one of the cleaning staff complain about how one of the supply closet’s lock never worked properly. As she tested the doorknob, Luce grinned as it opened easily. Pulling Remmy in behind her, Luce wasted no time pressing them up against the door and capturing their lips in a rough, intense kiss.

“There what-- Oh.” Remmy blinked in surprise as Luce yanked open a supply closet door and pulled them in. Their mind, for a moment, fought between the fact that this was probably a bad idea and the fact that kissing Luce felt so good after everything they’d been through. Their back pressed against the door as she pressed into them and they kissed her back for a moment, before the buzzing in their arms overwhelmed them enough to pull slightly away. “What if someone needs to get in here?” they asked, but despite the concern in their words, their eyes, their hands moving along Luce’s body, told a different story. Already tugging at her shirt, finding her lips again, soft and gentle as they turned her around to press against the door. “Isn’t this like...a closet?”

“Then I’ll melt the doorknob.” Luce muttered as she kissed their neck, her fingers pulling at their hair once more as she kept them pinned against the door. Besides, with their zombie strength, Luce highly doubted anyone would be getting through there if Remmy didn’t want them to. She let them pull her shirt over her head and tossed it onto one of the shelves, let them maneuver her so it was her back against the wall. Door. Whatever, same thing. Glancing around at the darkened room around them, Luce nodded, a grin playing on her lips. “Yup. Look at us, back in the closet. But, this is,” She ran her hands up their back, dragging her fingertips against their skin, “Much better.”

“Is that really a--” Remmy said between kisses, “--good idea?” Did they care? Well, yes, sort of. Melting a doorknob was a bad solution to being walked in on while fucking in a closet, but did they care in this moment? Not really. Their skin almost burned with how much they wanted to be with Luce, with how much they’d missed the feel of her warm skin. Remmy was no fool, they understood what it meant, but right now wasn’t the time to process that feeling. Not when Luce was taking her shirt off and Remmy was already reaching down to pull their own off, warm fingers dragging along their skin. “Okay, yeah,” they said, nodding as they leaned into her bare skin, hands planted against the door, “this is definitely better.” Besides, no one was opening this door as long as Remmy could help it. As long as they didn’t think about the fact that they were once again in a small, enclosed space.

“Do you think I give a fuck if it’s a good idea or not?” Luce murmured, unclipping her bra with a quick motion. She wanted to feel Remmy against her, all of them, she didn’t really care what the consequences were. People fucked all the time in hospitals, that’s what shitty reruns of Grey’s Anatomy told her at least. As their shirt came off, Luce leaned forward once more, kissing them as hard and as desperately as before. She wanted to feel them. Wanted to know that they were here, with her, right now. And she wanted to keep them in this moment. She could still see that collar pressed around their neck and, now that she knew what it could do… it made her anxious. She couldn’t imagine how Remmy felt about it. But, that’s what this was all about. Forgetting about all the shit they’d been through. Biting their lip hard, Luce shot them a smug grin. “You wanna show me how much better?”

“Alright,” Remmy mumbled against her, “good point.” If there was one thing Remmy had come to learn about Luce was that she really didn’t care what other people thought. It was a quality Remmy had wished they’d had almost their entire life. Always monitoring themself to make sure they didn’t hurt or upset or anger anyone. They really admired it in Luce, too. There were, actually, a lot of things about her that they admired, but right now, they were going to focus on admiring her bare body instead. A smirk grew on their face and they hoped she could still see it in the dim light of the closet. “I do,” they said, “I really, really do.”

When they stepped out of the closet a while later, Remmy smoothed their hands down their shirt and tried their best to untangle their hair. They’d need another haircut soon, but they were kind of starting to like the longer length. After Jax had made them shave their head, there seemed to be a small sense of freedom in the length that came after. They turned to look back at Luce as she quietly closed the door. “Hungry?” they asked, raising a brow. “Or we could go for that walk I originally suggested.”

Fixing her lipstick, Luce rolled her eyes as she followed Remmy out of the closet and wiped off a small impression of her lips from their cheek. “You missed a spot.” She teased as she glanced around. No one was the wiser to what had happened, which was just how she wanted it. It was just a hook-up. A “congrats, you didn’t die, let’s celebrate that” fuck. Which wasn’t one that she’d had before but, honestly, she didn’t mind it. As she walked down the hallway, intending to head back out, Luce was startled by their question. “I’m good on a walk. I already got the heart rate going for today.” She declined the invitation with a shake of her head. Food on the other hand… But, she didn’t want them to get the wrong idea about things between them. “I’m good. Besides, I don’t want to keep you from Blanche any longer.”

Remmy frowned a little. While what had just happened had them buzzing, they were kind of hoping Luce wasn’t going to just ditch. Maybe she was just tired again. She’d been through quite a bit in the past few weeks, and even after having a heart attack she’d come to help rescue them. “Oh, yeah, okay…” But something else tugged at them, a thought they didn’t like having. They didn’t want to be alone. Sure, they’d been alone in the room before, but the thought of going back there alone now, made their hands shake a little. “Um, can-- can you stay with me?” they asked, feeling suddenly raw and vulnerable. “Just...just for a bit. Till Blanche wakes up? We don’t have to...do anything. I just don’t want…” they glanced around, then back to her, the empty hallway filling in around them, “to be, you know-- alone.”

Hearing the way Remmy’s tone changed, the way their hands seemed to tremble, Luce swallowed. She didn’t care. And they shouldn’t care either. This was just a hookup. Just a random fuck that happened more out of convenience than anything else. It didn’t matter. “I should go.” She shook her head, folded her arms across her chest as she spoke. The strange discomfort from before, which had vanished when she’d felt their body press against hers, had returned with renewed vigor. And all she could think to do was run away, to get out of here. And hopefully then the strange feeling that lingered in her chest would leave. “I’m sure Nell will be over here soon. She can keep you company while you wait for Blanche.”

Remmy had faced rejection before, but somehow this felt way worse. They felt like their heart was sinking into the pit of their stomach and they couldn’t help the quick glance of shock that went through them, before reigning it in and looking down. “O-oh, yeah, that’s-- that’s fair,” they muttered, taking a step back. They suddenly felt like their face was on fire and they wanted to melt into the wall or maybe even sink through the floor. “Right, okay. Um...that’s fine.” They backed away a little. “You should probably get some more rest, anyway. After everything.” What else was there to say? Remmy rubbed the back of their head. “And, um-- I know you probably just came to help Nell, but-- thanks. For coming. For-- helping us.”

As Remmy took back and the space grew between them, the feeling in her chest grew as well. Luce glanced down the hall-- she wasn’t having some weird heart thing again was she? If she was, at least being in the hospital would help. Would make it easy for her to get help. “Yeah. Rest.” She repeated with a nod of her head. She’d done… big fucking magic yesterday. Magic she didn’t even fully understand. Why had it appeared yesterday? Why then and not before, when she’d been practicing in her cabin, working so hard to hone her flames into something more? At their words, she resisted the urge to say that she’d gone in there for them too. They didn’t need to know. “I did what I needed to do to keep my family safe.” She said with a shrug before walking down the hallway. The entire time she walked away from them, the strange ache in her chest persisted. As Luce was about to head out the door, she paused, glancing down the hallway at Remmy. “There’s a carnival in town. Why don’t we celebrate you being free from that shitshow sometime? Text me.” She said before pushing open the door and slipping out into the lobby. Christ. Why had she said that? Why had she done that? She didn’t like carnivals, didn’t give a shit about the games or the stupid attractions. Remmy had just looked so… worn out. She was just trying to help them celebrate, maybe take them back to her cabin after. That was all. That’s all this was.

Something was changing inside of Remmy and they weren’t sure what to do about it. They couldn’t hide their disappointment as Luce admitted that she was just there for Nell. They weren’t sure why they were assuming she’d have done any different-- she’d made it pretty clear to them last time they’d met up that she only thought of them as someone to sleep with. And...they had told themself they were okay with that. And they’d tried really hard to be okay with that. But something had changed and Remmy couldn’t go back anymore. And when Luce turned back, they couldn’t help the leap that their heart did into their throat, stealing their words. A smile grew on their face, from ear to ear, as they watched her leave. Carnival. Yeah, they could do that. They could definitely do that. Besides, they’d all earned some time off, right? Some time to relax. And even though Luce had walked away, Remmy could still taste her on their lips and feel her in their grip. They turned to head back to Blanche’s room, a warm feeling swirling in their stomach. A feeling they hadn’t felt in a really long time, and after the month they’d had, damn was it nice.

#p: sad #p: remmy mcallister #chatzy #wickedswriting #//my chatzy tagging system may call this sad but its really not