#< - brain has decided to forcibly transition me /hj

[transillusionisms]

my brain has straight-up invented a trauma response today. i can't be touched without warning, if someone's around i need to know where they are, and i haven't been hungry all day. i genuinely don't know if i started the kettle or not, but i must have, because it was hot when i poured it into my cup. when i was about to ask my sibling to get up, instead of "hey could you tell me to go make my tea" what almost came out of my mouth was "hey can you snap two times" and then i just sat there with my mouth open for a second. sibling put on a belt that was laying on the couch and i couldn't take my eyes off it until it was hidden by her shirt again.

i'm not gonna say this feels like conditioning but,, you know the deathgrippers in httyd? whatever was up with them is currently up with me

#sauro don't look #pine speaks #i don't know how to tag this im sorry #vent tw #uh. ask to tag?? #like i KNOW nothing caused this. but my brain has given me it anyway #transramcoa #< - brain has decided to forcibly transition me /hj