#‘you have labelled your issues with these developmental disorders to absolve yourself of a responsibility to heal from them; since; unlike

[thefiresofpompeii]

session with the psychiatrist today and he finalised getting me a s*roquel prescription… upon a google i discovered that one of the most common side effects is supposedly weight gain so now i am actually considering the preferred alternative option of recovery which is k*lling m*self

#he is 1. russian 2. the sessions are being paid for and monitored by my father #i tried calmly and reasonably explaining to him that i do not suffer from bipolar disorder and that #the prevalent part of the symptoms which cause me direct discomfort or suffering in my day to day #life most closely correspond to adult ‘female’ adhd and autism; and that the #only psychiatric pharmaceuticals which would cause a legitimate positive impact on my life would be those prescribed to ADHD patients; #which means that what he really should be doing is writing me a reference form to speed up the diagnosis process. his response? #‘you have labelled your issues with these developmental disorders to absolve yourself of a responsibility to heal from them; since; unlike #mental illnesses; they are not temporary and cannot be cured; only alleviated’ #ok mental illness isn’t temporary either; total recovery is nigh impossible. plus; i don’t want meds for a cure. i want meds to be able to #manage and live like a functioning adult human being. as in; be able to concentrate on what i am invested in; to ameliorate skills and put #in an ounce of effort instead of floating mindlessly without concrete goals or desires #okay maybe i need depression meds. MAYBE. but i have a sneaking suspicion that the moment i start taking adhd medication and become #far more productive and accomplished by my own standards; my depressive state will begin to dissipate without psychiatric intervention #jamie.txt #tw ed implied #antipsych