#Clavikiss personal

[999deadblog999]

I'm not gonna lie, I feel like I have a problem with the term 'abusive people.' I'm not huge on the indication that they're just like that, as a person, and even if they tried to change, they're 'still an abusive person'

I absolutely don't intend to erase anyone's experiences-I'd be erasing my own too if that were the case. However, doing dbt and learning how to frame things in a healthy lense... It's not helpful to me in my healing to see things phrased like that. It just feels weird. I've hurt people before and not realized it- and they turned and leveraged the idea of 'abusive people' against me and told me I would never change, and that fucked with me for years. It still does sometimes. Even when I'm doing great, being social, and working on myself, it's hard to get away from seeing that drilled at you while you're trying to sincerely apologize for your behavior.

I've never found a situation painted with broad, unforgiving strokes to be compassionate or helpful. It just twists your thinking into a more 'them VS us' view of the world, which is precisely the type of black/white thinking that dbt therapists generally try to get you away from.

Everyone has the capacity to heal. Whether they act on it or not is on their own accord.

#Clavikiss personal #Im just frustrated with seeing that in trauma healing communities and I'm like... :/ #It's just a different type of weaponization. People are just people. And sometimes people can get real lost and be really shitty. #Sometimes they're remorseless and not interested in don't better. My birth family is like that. I get that. #My biggest prob with it comes in when ppl use it to assert their ableism against ppl with stigmatized mental health problems #Which seems like it happens quite a lot unfortunately #And it's precisely that type of thinking that led an older trans woman to abuse myself and my boyfriend-she was convinced one or both of us #Have NPD. And sure #One of us does #But turning around to be unremorsefully shitty towards with that others won't heal the trauma she acquired from her abuser. #It left us with even more trauma we'll have to unpack with a therapist that'll hear us. #It perpetuates an exhausting cycle. #Hurt people hurt people. Break the cycle. There's never a reason to believe someone is innately shitty because 'it's just how they are' #Everyone has the capacity to heal and be better. #Everyone. #I mean it. #Doesn't mean you have to talk to them #But developing an us VS them mindset won't heal your pain. It'll just make you scared. Or a hurtful person to be around. #Also- no I'm not being transphobic I'm literally trans and talking about my experience #If you come into my askbox with that I will not give you the time of day. #People in minority groups have just as much capacity to be abusive as someone who is not.

[999deadblog999]

My boundaries are my boundaries. They are not an attack on anyone. They are not up for question. They sure as shit are not a manipulation.

My boundaries are my boundaries. I must have them to heal.

#clavikiss personal

[999deadblog999]

I'm a person. And I am doing my best.

#clavikiss personal

[999deadblog999]

DON'T FORGET TO INTERACT WITH YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA TODAY! :) REMEMBER TO INTERACT! :) DONT LET DOWN YOUR FOLLOWERS! :) YOUR LIFE IS DEFINED BY YOUR ONLINE PRESENCE! DON'T FORGET TO INTERACT! :) DON'T EDUCATE YOURSELF ON BEHAVIORAL PSYCHOLOGY ADVERTISING CAMPAIGNS! CELEBRATE! CELEBRATE! CELEBRATE!

ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DELETE YOUR ONLY REASON FOR LIVING? :(

#I got a notification and it was this and it irritated the shit out of me. #Tumblr this isn't cute I left Twitter to get away from this weird manipulative shit #Can people just. Have social media accounts without the app reminding them that it exists every ten minutes? #This person you follow is back online! Are you sure you want to delete your tumblr account? Your only reason for living? :( #Please just. Shut the fuck up corporation. #clavikiss personal #Clavikiss vent #Ish? #Vent ish. #Less a vent and more an expression of frustration at the current climate of capitalism needing too dig into any facet of your life possible #edited the original which is basically 'WOW! 2000 POSTS HERE'S AN ACHIEVEMENT! HERE'S A BOOST! HERE'S SOME BEHAVIORAL PSYCHOLOGY BULLSHIT!' #More plastic wrapped capitalist bullshit for a different website trying to gouge a different niche.

[999deadblog999]

Hope, an incurable hemophilia

To bleed and bleed and bleed

#Really feeling that quote rn. #clavikiss personal

[999deadblog999]

In your growth, may you learn to thrive. Deep peace becomes you. I wish you that.

#Clavikiss personal

[999deadblog999]

Another's anger is not my fire

#I'm not obligated to put it out for you. #Do not try to set me alight. #I am becoming water and learning what that means. #I am deep beneath the surface. I am peacefully seeing what exists around me. My healing journey is not your call to voyeur. #I am a person not an observation desk. Leave me alone. #Clavikiss personal