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vilandel · 14 days

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Night of Vows

Summary She kissed him again, more deeply this time, smiling as she felt him giving in to the kiss. As they parted, she poked his cheek and said with a smirk, “Consider this a vow I just made.”

A/N Since @f-oighear was so kind to recommend this particular oneshot here, I've decided to share it with you on Tumblr as well. Thank you, dear Oighear 💘 It is one of my first oneshots for Black Clover and about Nozessa. And most importantly, I created my Clover Kingdom wedding vows thanks to this fic and now, I use them always when I have to write a wedding in one of my stories. I'm actually very proud of them and I hope you will like those vows^^

Ao3 link

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“It’s still snowing.“

Vanessa sighed deeply, defeated, as she looked again out of the little window. The biggest snowflakes she ever saw were still falling from the sky. It was basically impossible to go out and join the others, not to mention that both of them won’t be found for a while.

Nozel didn’t answer, still sitting in front of the fireplace, watching the flames. He seemed thoughtful. Not more than usually, but knowing him, he was clearly thinking about their situation and was trying to figure ways out.

For reasons only known by himself, the Wizard King had decided to organize more joint missions between squads and the Black Bulls, Silver Eagles and Blue Roses already did three missions together since. It was an odd mix and the teamwork was just becoming better, but they still made it work, surprisingly.

Only this time, all three captains were coming too. And it was a more dangerous mission, some rather powerful bandits with a leader who possessed very strong snow magic, who took an entire town in the Forsaken Realm as hostage. He managed a rather impressive snowstorm spell, which separated the knights. Vanessa only knew that Nozel managed to fight this man and maybe even defeated him, since the storm weakened. She might remember seeing Asta caught the guy, before they were separated.

But the snow didn’t stop, there was no way to find the others and so they took shelter in an abandoned hut, luckily still intact. After managing to make a fire – Nozel seemed to have learned some surviving basics during the last few weeks – all they did was waiting.

Vanessa sighed. That wasn’t really the alone time she imagined having with her boyfriend. Secret boyfriend, that is. A royal, not to mention a Head of House, with a witch, was for most nobles considered as an inappropriate match. And this was still a rather polite description. These past few weeks, Vanessa learned many things about the reality within royal and noble circles, she heard more harsh descriptions.

She turned to her boyfriend again. Nozel still didn’t say anything, just watching the fire. If she didn’t know him any better, Vanessa would have thought that he was still stunned to have make fire by himself. Noelle had reacted the same way, after all. But Vanessa just instinctually knew that something was bothering him.

“Do you know who the leader of bandits was? He seemed very strong and his beef against higher ups looked a lot like obsession.“

Actually, she wasn’t particularly interested in that topic, but honestly, she would take any conversation at this point, just to bring him out of his frozen glare. She was sick of the wait and silence.

Nozel finally turned to her, a puzzled expression in his eyes. “Yami didn’t tell you?“

“No, he just said it was a joint mission and that there will be a battle. That’s all. Since he didn’t need more to motivate Asta, Luck and Magna, he probably thought he didn’t need to say more.”

“Why am I not surprised?”, Nozel sighed, but not nearly as annoyed as he would be when it comes to Yami. He just sounded so… tired and Vanessa didn’t really like the sound of it.

“This man is actually a bastard from an old and very well-respected noble house. Like any bastard, he was thrown away and considered less. Well, I don’t know the details, but apparently, he came to the conclusion that since he was basically banished from his father’s house, he must be fated for something great, better than anyone and he made some kind of vow to prove it, which turned into obsession.”

“I agree that this bastard situation is unfair, but why using this as an excuse to hurt other people, especially those in the Forsaken Realm? I mean, captain Vangeance and Luck are also bastards with noble lineage and they aren’t full of grudge against nobility.”

“The Wizard King told us that this bastard considers himself better than anyone, better than commoners, peasants and nobles in general, better than his family and royalty especially. He seems also to be a very stubborn man, decided to fulfil his vow at any cost. The sad irony is, he became exactly like his father who abandoned him…“

Vanessa sighed heavily. She had heard from Finral and Noelle stories about bastards with noble lineage, who were holding grudges against their noble family to an unhealthy degree, hiding behind the unfairness of their situation to hurt others.

The complex and rather corrupt reality of nobility with the Clover Kingdom was unfair to say the least and could make a lot of people suffer. Not only bastards and peasants, but also people who weren’t outcasted. Vanessa never knew anything about this until after she and Nozel started dating. She was very naïve back then and sometimes, now that she’s more concious about this reality, she still wished she was.

Vanessa moved from her place to sit besides Nozel. Slowly her hand slid in his. He didn’t back away. Holding her hand tightly. This was really reassuring.

They had this discussion about status and rumours quiet at the beginning of their relationship. First, Vanessa didn’t understand why he wanted to keep their relationship a secret. She really thought that Nozel was ashamed of her. But that wasn’t the case…

She learned how her relationship would be viewed within royalty and nobility, how rumours could hurt more than they should. She learned that love doesn’t have a place for most of those people. It wasn’t a pleasant lesson, but the worst part was to witness how the other two royal Heads of House treated Nozel.

Vanessa clenched a fist while remembering. She’d been hidden, none of those two knew about hers and Nozels relationship. But it made her so, so angry. To hear them talk to him like this, their disgust hidden behind so-called concern, their secret joy to have him struggle with his House, the contradictions in every second sentence… it made her went on edge and if she had listened to herself, she wouldn’t have hesitated to put this gaudy king and this close-minded Vermillion prince in their place (how did the Head of Vermillion managed to have at least five likable grandchildren, honestly?).

But Nozel did asked her to not try anything. He told her that he was used to it and if she tried to scold them, it would put more difficulties not only on him, but also on her and maybe put their future together at risk. A risk Nozel wasn’t ready to take.

Which also meant, even though he never talked about it yet, he was seriously thinking about having a future with her. And this meant much more to Vanessa than she thought it would.

She always had been more to enjoy the present, to not worry about the future. Unlike Nozel, who had this habit of overthinking things really far ahead. Vanessa had asked him to at least try to stop and he really did try. But even she had to admit that it wasn’t wrong to think at least a bit about their future.

Their love was deep, truer than anything what Vanessa had known before. Which was a surprise, considering that they come from different circles, that many things would normally separate them. And still, even though she couldn’t yet see herself as a princess, as a lady Silva, she could very easily see herself growing old with Nozel. A nice thought…

If she forgot what difficulties may lie ahead of them.

Vanessa put a hand on Nozels shoulder. “Honey, I know the situation is rather, well, irritating, as you would put it. But we won’t be in this hut forever, the others will find us. And, if you’re worry about Yami teasing-“

“That’s not what I’m worrying about.“

Nozel stood suddenly up, starting pacing around the hut. “It has nothing to do with the mission.”

“Then what is it?”, Vanessa asked.

Nozel was now looking at her, almost defeated. Now, this was worrying Vanessa. She didn’t like when he had something like defeat in his eyes. He was good at hiding it, but she’d learned to look beyond his cold mask.

He sighed.

“My father knows about us.”

Just at this moment, the wind began to howl, like it just waited for this moment.

Vanessas mind went blank. His father? The very father none of all four Silva siblings liked to talk about? But wasn’t he supposed to be out of the country or something like this?

She didn’t know much about this man, neither Nozel nor Noelle were eager to talk about him. Heck, even Solid and Nebra seemed to resent him, which said a lot. All Vanessa knew was that he wasn’t there for any of his children birth and neither when Acier Silva passed away, he was late at his wife’s burial and that he was rather a taboo subject for the Silva siblings.

So… how much of bad news was it that this man knows about her and Nozel? And since when was he back, anyway?

Nozel didn’t let her time to ask questions. He just took a deep breath before he continued, “I still have no idea how and when he learned about us. His return was rather incognito, so none of my siblings knows that he’s back. For now. Knowing him, he would love a rather pompous ceremony for his official return. And I know a good bunch of royals and nobles who would do this for him.“

Nozel sounded so bitter. Usually, he never sounded this bitter, not even about Yami.

“A good bunch of royals and nobles. Even the other two royal Heads?” Vanessa asked slowly.

“My father is very good at… well, bootlicking. You know our king. He lives for homages to himself. As for the Head of House Vermillion, he knows that my father and I aren’t on good terms. So, he uses it against me, for various reasons and no matter the possible contradictions. He’s doing this since I became Head of House, actually.”

Vanessa clenched a fist. She hated how her boyfriend was treated like. Before they started dating, she never would have thought that other royals would think so little of him, hiding their disrespect behind concern. It was so… she didn’t have any words for it. She came to think that this might be one of the reasons why Nozel kept his emotions behind a cold mask. Honestly, Vanessa came to admire him about how he managed to deal with those subtle insults in such a calm way, most of the time.

“How did your father learn… about us?”

“I told you, I have no idea. His return wasn’t official. None of my siblings knows that he’s back, only very few servants. He came directly to me. And unusually for him, he went direct to the point.”

Nozel paused, sitting down of the huts lone bed. They really were lucky that it even had some clean sheets.

Vanessa waited. Mostly because she didn’t know what to say. She didn’t even know what to think. Until now, only the Wizard King and Nero knew about their relationship. And Marx. None of them would’ve ever spilled the beans. It was such a shock that someone new would know about them. Someone who didn’t seemed very pleased about their relationship.

She didn’t know what the Witch Queen would say and honestly, Vanessa rather wouldn’t care or think about her opinion. She knew the Bulls would be shocked, especially Noelle and let’s not forget the other two siblings. Nebra and Solid might not be very pleased at best, but well, Vanessa could live with that. But what about a person she only heard about? A man she never met, on which she never heard any good things and not so much in general? Vanessa didn’t like that she had no idea.

Nozel sighed deeply, before he continued, “My father wasn’t happy about our… relationship. Well, he had quite a less polite way to describe it. The words he used to describe you were horrendous and I snapped. Very much at the beginning.”

Vanessa saw him clenching his fists. Nozel might seemed calm right now, but it was clear as crystal for her that he was very much on edge about the conversation with his father. She sighed. She could very well imagine which kind of insults her boyfriend had to listened to. Oh, Vanessa was used to, but she knows Nozel. When someone insults her, he could be more terrific than the other Black Bull and that’s saying something.

“I tried very hard to explain despite my anger, but he wouldn’t listen. He was very much upset about the scandal it could bring upon him, for starters.”

“Upon him? Not the House?”

“He claimed that he was upset about House Silva as well, but, honestly, I didn’t believe him at all. He married into the House, but even then, he could have cared. Which he didn’t. If he really did care, he would had helped my mother with her duties as Head, he would have been here during her last weeks, he would have helped Nebra, Solid, Noelle and me with our duties and also other things, he would have… done so many things actually, now that I think about it. But he didn’t. He always found reasons to slip away from… work. Paperwork that is, the duties from behind the scenes, as my mother called them.”

Something like fondness past through his eyes. Vanessa couldn’t help but smile. She loved the look Nozel had when talked about his mother.

“But the duties of showing, of presentation, all of this… he loves it. I remember how he dragged me and my siblings to all those… events. Despite how mother pleaded to wait, we were all rather young. But he wanted it. To show himself. We were barely tools for his glory. And for him to stand right in the light, no one of us had to step out of the way. He always had this mindset. Even after my mother died, even after he was mostly out of the country.”

She never heard her boyfriend talk this much about his father. It was strange. After all, none of the Silva siblings liked talking about him and Nozel even less so. But looking at her boyfriend, it seemed to Vanessa that he needed to get it out of his chest. She could only imagine how his discussion with his father went and he won’t show much, but she knew, she just knew, that he needed to let it out.

Vanessa stood up and reached for Nozels hand, squeezing it softly. He squeezed back. She hoped she could comfort him. With a nod, she invited him to continue.

“My relationship with you… for him, it was me stepping out the way. Again.”

“Again?”

“I don’t know when it began, when was the first time I upset him. As far as I can remember, he always seemed… well, unhappy with me. He was already mad at me for not kicking Noelle out of House Silva.”

“But… why?”, Vanessa asked, genuinely shocked, not able to put it in words. She knew by now that Nozel never kicked Noelle out of the family, even if it had looked that way. But it only looked that way. Vanessa had recently learned that to kick someone out of a Royal House, a hearing was needed. And given Nozels true affection for his sister, despite everything that happened, Noelle never really was at risk to be banished from the Silvas.

“In all honesty, I never understand it either. I don’t think I want to. But that wasn’t the only thing about me he’s upset with. He always seemed disappointed with me. But our relationship seems to be the worst for him.”

Nozel stopped, hesitating to tell more. Vanessa could see many emotions in his eyes, anger, disgust, pain, altogether. Even hesitation. She let out a deep sigh, let go of his hand and went in front of him, putting her hands on both sides on his face, forcing him to look at her.

“Honey, please, let it out. I’m not blind, I can see that you need it. Don’t worry about me, about what your father said about me. What he thinks is not what you think and his views on us won’t affect what we feel for each other. Now, tell me what happened.”

For a moment, Nozel just looked at her, with surprise and even admiration in his eyes. He kissed her forehead first, before continuing.

“My father tried to be calm, but he failed to do so. He was furious, practically scolding me for… well, he said forsleeping with a witch. He dismissed the fact that you’re a Magic Knight, who already served the kingdom countlessly. The words he used to describe you… sorry, but I can’t bring it over myself to say them out loud. I snapped, counting down all the things I reproached him for many years. Never had it been so hard for me to not attack anyone. I could barely hold myself back. I told my father that I love you, but he dismissed that. For him, as for many nobles and royals, love is just a foolish thing. Royals don’t love is a very common motto. Marriages are for alliances, power, glory. Love has nothing to do with it. I feel so stupid for having believed that once. For my father, love is even a childish thing.”

“But… What about your mother? She did love him, right? At least, that’s how I understood it.”

“She did. But he never loved her back. Deep down she might already have known it, given how much love and affection she gave me and my siblings all her life. Although I don’t think my mother realized it at the beginning. But I remember that after Solids birth, she looked sadder and more resigned when a talk was about my father. I think that back then, she began to realize that her love for him was one-sided. And she might have accepted it fully when she was expecting Noelle.”

Sadness and anger flashed through Nozels eyes. Vanessa slid her hand again in his, feeling his grip tighten.

“I don’t know how long we kept fighting. Not long I believe, but for me it was like hours. My father kept going on all the things I apparently made him upset with. I learned a few more things, even. My magic even disappointed him.”

“What? Why? Why would he be disappointed about your magic?”

“Honestly, I have again no idea and I haven't been in the mood to ask. He basically told me that he didn’t want four children to begin with. But since I didn’t inherit his attribute, he wanted others, who would inherit it. He claims to have a strong aversion against metal attributes, but he didn’t explain why. I don’t even know if it’s true or if he came up with this just to try to humiliate me.”

“But this is not fair! Why should he be disappointed that you didn’t get his magic attribute? You have a great magic, you can use it in so many ways and skills, it’s so sophisticated! I… I can’t understand! Well… I knew that your father wasn’t a very nice person, but I didn’t expect that he…”

Vanessa had no words to properly describe how furious she was against Nozels father. She never met him and the few things she heard about this man didn’t make him really sympathetic, but this!

She already knew he was rather harsh towards Noelle, even though neither her nor Nozel would give her details. But she genuinely hasn’t thought that he would also be this harsh towards Nozel as well. What he just told her sounded familiar. Not only because it sounded pretty similar to what the other two royal heads would reproach him. But this disappointment about everything Nozel did or was, even things he couldn’t help it. The father being upset that his son wasn’t perfect, that his son didn’t meet his expectations… It sounded similar to her own situation with her own mother. Vanessa didn’t like it, at all. Even though the Witch Queen never screamed or got loud about her disappointment.

Was the Silva father even upset about Nebra and Solid as well? With what Vanessa heard, it wouldn’t be too much of a surprise. Nebra has mist magic, which isn’t one of the stronger attributes. As for Solid, Vanessa couldn’t think of anything, but why wouldn’t the father find something as well to be upset with his other son?

She never met the man, never wants to either and if, only to put him in his place. The father of the Silva siblings sounded like an arrogant jerk.

Her angry thoughts were interrupted when two hands cupped her face. Nozel looked at her with determination.

“Vanessa, I know you’re angry, but please calm down. I don’t care what my father thinks about me. I stopped caring about it a long time ago. I was angrier about how dared to talk about you. He didn’t care that I love you, he didn’t care to understand. At the end, I couldn’t take it anymore. I basically told him that… well… no matter what he says or does, I’d rather die in celibacy than marrying a woman who isn’t you. In fact, I basically made a vow to marry you.”

Silence followed his words. A silence during which they just stared at each other. Vanessa tried to realize what he just said.

Suddenly, Nozel blushed heavily and he let go of her, hurrying to the huts window. Vanessa just turned to him, confused but also feeling another emotion she couldn’t quiet describe.

“I… well… After that, my father basically was trying some menaces, but I couldn’t take him seriously. He acted like he was the Head of House, which he isn’t. He was married to a Silva, he was never born into House Silva and he never really cared about it. I… well… I made position perfectly clear. He quit soon after, but it’s only a matter of time before his return becomes official.”

Nozel stopped. He seemed so unsure, which worried Vanessa a bit. But at the same time, he was flushed and that was always adorable.

Vanessa went to him, taking his hand. She had to comfort him about his jerk of a father. But she also needed to talk with him about that vow he mentioned. After all, she was still trying to realize his words.

“Your father might have a pretty positive reputation within royals and nobles, he might be an excellent bootlicker. But I don’t think his influence might be this strong that he could take the power to force his will upon you and your siblings.”

“I wish I could be as certain as you are. But… what if he-“

“You could fill all four kingdoms in bottles with what ifs. I’m not saying we shouldn’t care at all. But whatever your father tries to do, we’re going to face it together. We’re together in this, Nozel. Never forget that.”

Nozel just looked at her. Surprised of course, he was lightly blushing again. But there was also gratitude and love in his eyes. Gosh, he was so cute behind that cold mask.

Vanessa took his other hand and looked firmly into his eyes. “Did you mean it?”

“Mean what?”

“The vow you made during the fight with your father. To… marry me. Did you really mean it?”

Nozel blushed even more, but he tried very hard to not look away from her. Vanessa wouldn’t have let him anyway. A few moments past, but they seemed like hours while she waited.

“I… I meant it.”

He only looked down after his answer. But he didn’t let go of her hands.

Relief and happiness flew through her. He really meant it. Never would Vanessa have thought how much this would mean to her until now. It was still surprising, as she already thought about it, but not that much.

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry? What for?”

“I shouldn’t have made such a decision without your consent.”

Vanessa couldn’t help but chuckle. Why did he always feel so responsible?

“I don’t blame you. Given the circumstances. And it is cute.”

“Cute?”

“You really should learn how to take compliments. But seriously, honey, you shouldn’t be sorry. Why would you feel guilty, anyway?”

Nozel just looked at her, slightly frowning, like he didn’t understand what she was meaning.

“Well… I shouldn’t have taken such a decision all by myself, especially in overwhelming anger. It concerns you as well. Besides, our situation is… complex. Any wrong steps could be used against us and there are some risks I’m not sure I’m ready to take.”

Vanessa sighed, half amused, half annoyed. There was his strategic chess-brain again. Always thinking very forward. Sometimes it was useful, but honestly, his overthinking could exhaust him so many times it was almost hurtful to watch. Nozel promised her he would try to restrain his overthinking, but he would struggle from time to time. Old habits die hard.

“Is that really all what worries you? Honey, you promised me-“

“That’s not all! Actually… I’m also scared.”

Vanessa blinked. She didn’t expect that.

“Scared? Of what?”

“That… I would put you back in a cage. Status and duties can be like chains and I… I don’t want you to be a… prisoner. Again.”

Nozels eyes went down, his posture almost looking like defeat. But Vanessa firmed her grip on his hands. In fact, his words touched her very deep in the heart.

After they were dating for quite some time, both had been comfortable enough with the other to talk about some secret subjects of their pasts. Nozel told her about this curse he had gotten after his mother was defeated and cursed by Megicula. Vanessa, on the other hand, found herself brave enough to tell him about the cage were her mother kept her as a prisoner, in order to obtain that spell to control Fate. She remembered very well how shocked her boyfriend was, the compassion he showed, his concern…

Her story impressed him so much. Vanessa totally understood why he was afraid that he would put her in another cage if they may marry. Nozel was a much more caring man than he let himself be viewed.

Vanessa put a small kiss on his lips, which made Nozel looking back at her, slightly confused.

“Nozel, I understand that you fear this for me. But I just know that you would never put me intentionally in a cage. And even if it would happen unintentionally, I know you would do anything in your power to get me out. I love my freedom, but this also mean I’m free to choose what I want. I admit, I have yet difficulties to imagine myself as a royal princess, as a lady Silva.”

Nozel just nodded, sad and understanding, but Vanessa wasn’t finished, “But I believe it will come with time. Because on the other hand, I have no problem to imagine myself growing old with you. I chose to be with you, with all the difficulties that comes with the situation. And… I want to help you with your burden. You carried your duties and responsibilities as Head of House alone for far too long, if you ask me. I won’t let you alone anymore with this.”

She kissed him again, more deeply this time, smiling as she felt him giving in to the kiss. As they parted, she poked his cheek and said with a smirk, “Consider this a vow I just made.”

Nozel blushed again a bit and Vanessa couldn’t help but giggle. She loved seeing him all flustered.

“How did I deserve you?”

“I don’t know, honey. How did I deserve you?”

This time, the captain of the Silver Eagles let out a small chuckle. This made Vanessa happy. She loved seeing him smile and this was the first time since the start of the mission that Nozel actually smiled.

For a while, they just hold each other tightly without saying anything. The only noises came from the fire and the wind outside.

Finally, Nozel spoke again, “So, um, you… you wouldn’t mind?”

“Marry you? No, I wouldn’t mind. I still need get used to it, but more to the thought of being a royal lady, princess or whatever rather than being your wife. That is actually rather easy to imagine.”

Nozel smiled softly. But when he spoke again, his tone was serious, “It’s still a difficult situation. I don’t trust my father with whatever he’ll try to do. Not to mention other… aspects. It might take a while before we can get… married.”

And now he was blushing again. Seemed that Nozel too still needed to get used to the thought. Vanessa chuckled again. It was such a sight to see different emotions on Nozels face, once you looked beyond his cold mask. She would have loved to tell the Bulls this. But well, they wouldn’t believe her (except maybe Nero, she knows already about their relationship, after all). In that case, she would show them, once her relationship with Nozel would be out of secrecy.

The stood in silence, holding each other. After a while, Vanessa turned her head towards the window. It was still snowing, not strong, but it was already night. The rest of the Black Bulls, Silver Eagles and Blue Roses might have found shelter as well. They might have been separated into groups as well. Waiting for the falling snow to stop. The enemy has been defeated and caught, after all. Maybe it was better to just call it a night and to regroup with the others the next day.

Vanessa couldn’t help but smile. An entire night, alone with Nozel… how could she say no?

“I fear we might only regroup with the others tomorrow. It’s late and it would be foolish to go out right now.”

Nozel seemed a bit annoyed. Must be that captain side of him, that side who preferred that everything should be settled efficiently in a short period of time. Vanessa grinned. She knew just what to do to convince him that their situation wasn’t so bad after all.

She teased his upper lip with her mouth, caressing very slowly over his chest, feeling his muscles under the fabric of his clothes.

He wasn’t buff, but she knew now that despite the multiple layers of clothes and despite Yamis teased assumption, her boyfriend of a captain was actually muscular. Slender and lean, but he still has muscles. Another surprise for her when she fell for him. Buff men were supposed to be her type. But she still fell for Nozel and she with time she found that this was one of the best things that happened to her. At the end, Vanessa just decided that she had a new type and Nozel was the only one who fit it.

She knew he was blushing again, but he was still caressing slowly her hips. Vanessa looked at the bed. Well, it wasn’t as big as Nozels bed in the Silva palace. She was so used to his bed by now that she actually began to find her own, back at the Black Bull base, rather small. But it was still bigger than this one here. But still, even being not a king size bed and without silky sheets, but it still looked warm and comfy.

Vanessa noticed that one of the sheets were white. White… white like a…

An idea just plopped in her head. Oh, it was innocent and childish, but after their discussion, it seemed like a good idea. For her at least, from a general point of view, it may be stupid. But she really wanted to do it. And if it could help her boyfriend to relax a bit, even better!

Vanessa immediately took Nozels hand and dragged him to the bed, sit on it, took the white bedsheet and draped it over her head like a veil.

“Vanessa, what are you doing?”

She could see that Nozel was confused, slightly frowning. But he still sat down on the bed as well.

“Sorry if my idea seems rather childish, honey, but… okay, it is childish. But I thought, after our discussion, I know it may take a while before we could marry and since I still need to get used to this thought, so we might have a little rehearsal, kinda? Just to see how it feels.”

Nozel was still looking at her with confusion and now he was blushing. Again. Vanessa giggled. She might have broken her own record of making him blush a lot of time, this night.

“Pretty please, honey. I promise it won’t kill you. And we’re alone, no one’s witnessing a new hidden childish side of yours.”

Vanessa was now making puppy eyes. She knew Nozel couldn’t resist them. Which is why she’s only doing them on rare occasions. After all, she would have the feeling of using him if she did that trick more often.

Nozel sighed, but Vanessa could see a small smile appearing on his lips. Definetly a win, he was already starting relax a bit.

“Besides… Call me stupid, but I don’t really know how, well, weddings work. I know the basics, what it has, but details? No idea. I’ve never been to a wedding, I have no idea about the differences between noble weddings and commoner weddings, if the priest says the vows or the groom and bride.”

It was true. Vanessa never witnessed a wedding. She had never been invited to one and none of the Bulls was married or close too. Well, except Finral, but he was still engaged, there was still no date for the wedding. And for the other Bulls, marriage wasn’t in anybody’s future plans for now. It was a little frustrating, now that she thinks about it.

“First of all, you’re not stupid.”

Nozel had took her hands in his, as he looked at her. He was still flustered, but the confusion was gone. There was now determination in his eyes and tenderness. A glance which made Vanessa blushing.

“Second, noble weddings are rather complex and royal ones even more. I might teach you the details, but not yet, sadly. I don’t know all of them by heart. Most things are unnecessary complicated.”

“Like so many things within royalty, I bet.”

“You won your bet.”

Both chuckled, before Nozel continued, “At least, I can help you learn the royal wedding vows. They’re different from the classic ones for nobles and maybe even commoners. It’s the groom who speaks first, then the bride. And you have to look me in the eyes while saying the vows.”

“That looking in the eyes thing, is it also part of the procedure?”

“Normally yes. It’s to show that you mean your promise told in the vows. But since most royal weddings are arranged ones, groom and bride usually don’t look into each other’s eyes. Probably because they think if they don’t look into their spouse’s eyes, they won’t be bound by their promises.”

Nozel sighed and Vanessa did it too. Since she started dating her boyfriend of a prince, she had learned that cheating scandals were not so uncommon within royal and noble circles, with bastards as one of the consequences. Well, given that kinda the majority of those marriages weren’t coming out of love, it wasn’t really a surprise.

But that wasn’t for her. Neither for her boyfriend. She loves him, he loves her. And whenever they finally could get married, this would be their reason.

Vanessa looked up as Nozel hold her hands firmly, his gaze all on her. The determination in his eyes made her heart race.

“Faith. Hope. Love. By the three leaves of the Clover, I, Nozel Silva, take thee, Vanessa Enoteca, as my wedded wife. I will have Faith in thee, with thy life and trust thee mine. I will have Hope, helping thee to all hardships and happiness of life. I will Love thee, cherish thee in sickness and in health, be it forever.”

Those were beautiful wedding vows. Such a shame that today, they were used more for arranged marriages. Vanessa hoped now to say them without hesitation. She took a deep breath and looked into Nozels eyes.

“Faith. Hope. Love. By the three leaves of the Clover, I, Vanessa Enoteca, take thee, Nozel Silva, as my wedded husband. I will have Faith in thee, with thy life and trust thee mine. I will have Hope, helping thee to all hardships and happiness of life. I will Love thee, cherish thee in sickness and in health, be it forever.”

In the end, that wasn’t difficult at all.

Vanessa smiled at Nozel, who smiled back. He was happy, finally. Gosh, he was so beautiful when he smiled.

She couldn’t admire him for long, though he leaned towards her, kissing her deeply. Vanessa kissed him back, pulling him closer to her. Were kisses also part in arranged weddings? Surely not this passionate. She would ask Nozel later. For now, she had other plans for the night.

As they parted, Vanessa fell back on the bed, pulling Nozel towards her.

“Ready for the wedding night, husband of mine?”

He chuckled, before kissing her again. She couldn’t help but smile against is soft lips. It felt so much like Heaven.

They didn’t know when they could really get married. Or what the father of the Silva siblings would try to separate them. They didn’t know what other difficulties would lie before them, who and what would fight their relationship.

But they were together, they would face those hardships and fight those hurtful rules within royal and noble circles.

Tonight, that little wedding rehearsal might also be a vow for Nozel and Vanessa to not give up.

#Black Clover #Black Clover Fanfiction #My Writing ☘️♣️#Nozel Silva #Vanessa Enoteca #Nozessa #Nozel x Vanessa

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vilandel · 13 hours

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Morning Mist & Night Traffic

Chapter 1 – Frustrated Spring

A/N First chapter is now here. This story already got over 50 reviews on Ao3, how is this possible? I'm really happy. Thank you @f-oighear, @kalolasfantasyworld and @mamavino for your kind reviews on the prologue ♣️ 💘

Ao3 link

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Lavender just couldn’t understand why Lord Rosecliff still looked at her like this. Yes, he had been harsh, but she had been the same towards him, if not even more. She truly regretted telling him back then that his pain and perspective didn’t matter. She had refused to understand that day.

Now she did.

And yet, lord Rosecliff still didn’t glance at Lavender with hatred. She didn’t understood. He should, after what happened. Lady Undina was just waiting for an occasion to talk her down and to put herself up into his esteem. It was the perfect opportunity for lord Rosecliff to pay back.

But nothing like this was happening. Lavender didn’t dare to look into his eyes, even though it was difficult to do so usually, given this unique turquoise colour of his orbs. She was afraid of what she could see in it, since it wouldn’t be any disgust or disliking towards her. But she could still feel his glance upon her, kinder than she would have ever expected. Why was kindness more unbearable than disgust?

“That is because Finnegan came to understand YOUR perspective, Lavender cutie. And he was never interested in that bitch Undina in the first place. Even less so after he found out that she knew about what that jerk Ignacio wanted to do to you. Oh right, you don’t know that yet, it’s not yet revealed in the story from your point of view.”

Vanessa swallowed the last bits of her apple as she continued her reading. She would have loved to lie down on her bed instead of sitting, but sadly her cat Rouge has decided to take a nap on her lap.

And when Rouge was napping, it was always very long. Not to mention that he hated to be moved while he was snoozing. End of story, she was stuck in this position for a while. At least, she had some books to read. One of the rare classics she loved, Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen and her other current favourite literature, Roses & Lavender by that mysterious writer N. A. Steel, whom people only know the name. Well, whoever that was, he or she wrote amazing novels since a few years and Vanessa practically own almost each one of the books of this author.

There was also two books recommended by roommate, different genres than what Vanessa was usually reading. Apparently to force her a bit out of her reading comfort zone, but she had yet to give herself a grip and start trying them.

The first one was a spooky fantasy novel, Pure Within The Mirror by Nero Bird. Vanessa usually didn’t liked spooky stuff that much, but Dorothy always said that this author was great and there was no reason so far to doubt her.

The second book was from the romantasy genre, which might be more to Vanessas romantic taste. Emerald Snow by Nymphea Silber, a writer who had been extremely successful years ago according again to Dorothy, but who hasn’t written since over a decade.

Vanessa snickered. Nymphea Silber, N. A. Steel and Nero Bird. If those three had something in common, except having names starting with N, it was also that except their names and their books, no one knew anything about them.

The Three Word Mysteries of Clover, as they were called. But it was still speculated if anyone of them was really from the city of Clover. Sure, their books all where from Clover Editions, but those authors could also be from another city, like Diamond, Spade or Heart, maybe even from a small village. And why not from Raque, their countries own film industry and sea holiday town?

Dorothy loved to speculate about it a lot when she wasn’t busy being sleepy, but Vanessa wasn’t that interested. N. A. Steel was one of her favourite authors, on par with Jane Austen in her books when it comes to romance, and maybe she might try the other two novelist as well.

Caressing a purring Rouge, Vanessa continued her reading.

“Lady Lavender,” lord Rosecliff suddenly spoke. Lavender flinched at how gentle his voice sounded. How could she ever have thought that he was cold?

“Vanessa?”

“Meow!”

Vanessa flinched as she looked up, but thank goodness it was only Dorothy who appeared at her doorframe. Who else would it ever be, no one else was living with them.

Dorothy must have done some groceries, given the full bags she had with her. There must have been some catnips in, because Rouge immediately woke up, freed Vanessas lap and started to go around the bags while meowing.

“Yes, you little rascal, there is also some goody goodies for you. I didn’t expect to see you here, Nessa. Didn’t you have a date today?”

“Not anymore.”

“Oh. Did you got dumped again?”

“It was obviously his attention, but I dumped him first. Which upset him a lot, apparently I insulted his pride or something stupid like that. Gosh, why did I even tried with that jerk? And he even had the audacity to claim that I’m not pretty enough for him to try… you know what. Kicked him in the balls for that.”

“He probably deserved it. But what I don’t understand is why you are still trying to find a boyfriend when you only complain about your dates. Blind dates definitely don’t work with you, maybe you should stop?”

This was true and Vanessa also know that Dorothy might at least suspect her reason already. They were both coming from the same town, after all…

But Vanessa didn’t want to talk about that. It was behind her once and for all (she hoped), she lived now in Clover, had a roof over her head, more than one hobby, two small but good jobs that still leave them enough freedom, especially one of them was also home office mostly, she had friends.

Sure, she couldn’t forget her past… But it was behind her and she didn’t need therapy. Why would anyone need therapy when their life was fine?

Still, Vanessa would love to find someone, to fell in love and truly this time. One reason was her past and this was history. One other reason was her first crush that was the closest experience to love she ever had. A lost duckling crush on which she clinged upon was her only experience with love. She had to change that. Last reason was her romantic joyful side that still was longing.

It would have sounded like therapy might help… No, Vanessa didn’t need therapy. And she couldn’t let Dorothy suspect anything.

Vanessa sighed dramatically as she fell back on her bed, holding her two current favorite books in front of her as if they were some most important evidences during a trial.

“I can’t help it, Dotty! Jane Austen and N. A. Steel have put the level of being a wonderful man onto such a high level that I automatically have too much expectations for any potential boyfriend! But the only thing I get at best are jerks, not Darcys, colonel Brandons or Rosecliffs!”

Dorothy giggled, which could either mean that she was amused or kinda frustrated. “You do have a romantic soul, Nessa.”

“Yeah, maybe that’s the reason why I can’t get a proper boyfriend. But I don’t want to date a macho anymore! Why are gentlemen so out of fashion today? Maybe I was born in the wrong time period.”

“Aren’t you a bit overdramatic?”

“Maybe? I don’t know. I knew I shouldn’t have started to drink less wine.”

It didn’t sound like an easygoing joke and Vanessa knew that this wasn’t normal for her.

Dorothy as well, since she was now looking at her almost frowning, a vague worried glance in her bi-colored eyes. Sometimes Vanessa had the feeling that Dorothy was able to know people even through sleep and dreams.

Time to change the subject quickly.

“I promise I will read those two books you recommended me. But I had to read Roses & Lavender again. I love this story so much! N. A. Steel is just an amazing writer and so good at history stuff. Even when he or she invent a country for a novel, it is so believable! Especially the novels about the witch hunt period, fantastic!”

“Ha, of course witch hunting period is appealing for the two of us, right? Now, coming back to your romantic live-“

“I don’t need therapy!”

“I wasn’t going to tell you that?”

Probably not, but Vanessa acted more upon instinct than anything. Dorothy shook her head before she sat down on Vanessas bed, letting Rouge turning around the grocery bags with purrs and meows.

“I know you love romance, Nessa and you’re always so supportive of helping others with their love lives. But I have the feeling that you’re not really put your heart into it when it comes to your own.”

“How can you be so sure of that? You were never interested in dating, as far as I know.”

“Have you noticed that many of the guys you tried dating are merely pale copies of Yami and that only on a superficial level?”

“Damn, it’s that obvious? Finral said something similar as well.”

“Of course, he did. You should listen to your best friend, Nessa. It is only obvious to people who know you well and only if observant. Plus, like I said, those were pale copies only, so I didn’t connect the dots immediately. But the fact is, buff and rough, some even smoking, it is a vague description of Yami. Weren’t you over him?”

“I moved on from him, really… But I can’t forget my huge crush on him. You know the reasons. Shouldn’t he be my type somehow?”

“Don’t get yourself blinded by types, most of the time they’re never what we believe they are. I don’t why you focus still on guys that are only very vaguely like Yami, but maybe you will have more luck with men if you start thinking outside the box a bit? After all, you love the gentlemen in your books. Why not trying that for reality as well?”

Vanessa frowned a bit. What Dorothy said make sense, but somehow, she still wasn’t really convinced by it. Or didn’t she want to be?

She couldn’t continue to wonder about her rather unusual thoughts, as Dorothy continued, “This can also mean that you don’t need to search for a boyfriend if you don’t want to, you know. All I ask you to is to take a different approach. Maybe you don’t understand yet yourself what you want.”

“You know I’m wary of changes and I think I know at least a bit what I want.”

“Aw, your so cute when you are pouting. But come on, you are always so daring and proud, I am sure that you will overcome your current romantic frustration.”

“Romantic frustration,” Vanessa couldn’t help but snicker. Dorothy had sometimes the weirdest description of things.

“Come on, how else would describe your current state, you silly- No, Rouge, this fish is not for you, come back here!”

While Dorothy run out of the bedroom after the cat, Vanessa lied down again and watched at the ceiling without really seeing it. Dorothys words might have triggered something in her, but it was too sudden for Vanessa to take it seriously yet or not.

Should she really think outside the box? Pragmatically speaking, it shouldn’t be such a bad idea, given that every guy she tried to date ended up being an asshole, sadly proving her mother’s point about men-

No, stop! This time was behind her and Vanessa refused to ever think about it ever again! Even though maybe it was one of the reasons why…

“Stop!”

Vanessa looked out of the window, where a few pigeons were flying by. The spring sun was shining through the glass, giving her patchwork curtains a bright touch. She liked the view she had from her bedroom, it was right in front of the Clover Parc, one of the most beautiful parcs in the world, with the trees and the flowers and the paths. Sometimes, Vanessa could even see the romantic belvedere from afar.

Not that she ever got something romantic at the belvedere, even though it would be so great. Gosh, it was spring, the season of love and if Dorothy was right, she had a romantic frustration. What a time, really.

Well, spring holidays was almost over and the school where she worked as a helping nurse (although not a nurse in the classical way, so the term was maybe not fitting) would be open again and maybe it would help her to distract herself from that frustration or help her having clearer thoughts about her stupid situation.

She wondered if the teachers and students, plus others, were doing fine. She had seen some of them in the city during the holidays. The trouble trio Asta, Magna Swing and Luck Voltia have caused some problems in the parc just two days ago, when she got for a walk with Rouge, but Vanessa knew them, they never mean any harm. Okay, you could never be so sure about Luck, though.

Others had been away. Mimosa Vermillion had told her that she would be in Switzerland during the holidays, with her parents and her older brother. And her cousin Noelle Silva went to her family’s secondary villa with her oldest brother.

Hopefully it had been alright for the poor girl. Vanessa had quite some sympathy for her. She was able to recognize when a household wasn’t doing fine, due to her own experience. Family Silva didn’t seem like it was a loving family. Vanessa might not know the signs and she hadn’t met Noelles brother yet. But she knew the signs and she did hear that he was more like a cold man. But she also knew that Noelles brother went to school with Dorothy and Yami. Could she judge him without meeting him?

Vanessa still didn’t like him. Or at least, given the Silva household, she wasn’t sure yet if she could like him.

But little Noelle seemed to have some strong affection for him and according to Mimosa, he cared deeply for his little sister.

It didn’t explain why the Silva family wasn’t working well, but this at least spoke in his favor. Vanessa just hoped that it was true affection between Noelle and her brother, not something that was abusive.

Well, Vanessa dared still to assume that Noelles brother wasn’t into romance. He was a rich man and if Vanessa knew something about rich people in Clover, it was that they don’t believe in love.

Why would he be different?

At the same time, why would he be the same?

Well, one thing for sure, Vanessa would never try to date a rich guy. But this sudden thought surprised her still.

♣♣♣

Noelle took a huge bite from her salami sandwich. It was so good, the servants of the secondary residence even roasted the bread a bit and were generous with the butter. It was almost as good as Charmys sandwiches. And way better than those thin wannabe sandwiches they got in most train stations.

At least, from what Noelle knew about those wannabe sandwiches. She never tasted them before and the only one who always talked or rather complained about those was Magna. Given her classmate’s tendency to hyperbole when he was complaining about something, Noelle didn’t if she could always believe him.

She wondered what Asta had to say about…

STOP!

Now she was thinking about that idiot again, while she managed to have banned him from her mind during the integrity of the spring holidays! More or less, but this was a detail. And to be fair, her brother and her were currently on their way home to Clover, so she will see that idiot again soon.

It was the end of the spring holidays, school will start again like tomorrow and her brother needed to return to work as well. Okay, needed was a strong word, since they were Silvas and one of the three richest family in the city who descended from nobility. According to Nebra – and she tended to overreact – Silvas didn’t need to work.

But Nozel took his job seriously, unlike many rich people in Clover. Too serious some would say, since he didn’t allow himself many holidays, just a day off here and there at best. The fact that Nozel proposed to her to spend the spring holidays, just the two of them for two weeks, at the secondary residence of the Silvas, had been a huge surprise for Noelle. But at the same time, it made her really happy.

Not only was it an opportunity to avoid Asta during the holidays after… that happened, but spending two whole weeks alone with Nozel was always more than welcome. He was the only one she was close to within her family.

Noelle looked at her brother, sitting on the other side of the picnic table between the birches, eating his own sandwich and a small salad, reading a book absently. There was often silence between them, but Noelle didn’t mind. Over the years, this kind of silence became very agreeable and even understanding. Okay, sometimes she was still not sure how to act around Nozel, but it was the same for him around her and they were never stopping trying. At least, it was clear to both that they truly care for each other and even though Nozel could seem cold and distant for other people – which he was for anyone outside of the family and closest people – Noelle loved her oldest brother a lot.

She sighed silently. Oh, those two weeks with Nozel were great, but she was also happy to come back home. She missed the city of Clover, she missed her school – okay, not everything – she missed her classmates and friends, even Asta and Mimosa… somehow, she missed a lot of people and she missed the family cats. At least, those two who remained in Clover, only Canelle came with them on the trip.

But her family… Maybe Noelle missed them a bit, but mixed feelings were a norm in this case. She was never close to her sister Nebra – Vanessa sometimes felt more like an older sister than her own sister – even though they didn’t hate each other. It was just… distant in a strange familiarity. It had been worse in her childhood, but that changed. At least, Nebra was never like Solid.

Noelle never got along with her brother Solid, which made her sad, but given their childhood and how mad Nozel had been after that incident when she was five, it was probably for the best. Maybe one day, they could get along… but Solid was too much of a jerk.

Still, Solid was better than their father and the less Noelle met that man, the better. She didn’t know yet what exactly broke their family apart when she was still a baby. Noelle wasn’t close enough to Nebra and Solid to ask them, as for Nozel… he never show anything, but there were always tears shining in his eyes when it was mentioned and Noelle didn’t want her brother to suffer. Whatever happened, it had shattered him. So, Noelle might be wondering, but she would never ask. Their family was already unstable enough and she didn’t want to be distant with her older brother.

But fact is, their father was not someone she missed and even though Noelle didn’t know everything, it was clear that this man should be better out of their lives completely. If only this could be the case… Maybe Nebra and Solid would have been real siblings during her childhood?

And then… there was mother. That far away person who was a stranger to Noelle. That picture that was like a reflection of her own appearance, but it was someone else. A person Noelle missed, but felt unsure what exactly to feel towards. She sometimes visited their mother at the clinic, but never alone, always with her siblings or her Vermillion aunt and it was always a stranger who didn’t seem to recognize them. Never a mother, shattered, still beautiful but shattered.

Out of her siblings, only Nozel visited mother often. He was the one who still talked to her, softer than even with Noelle, who always brushed mothers hair, who didn’t see a stranger. Sometimes, Noelle thought that it didn’t do Nozel any good to visit their mother, she often heard him cry silently in his bedroom after each visit and she had no idea how to comfort him. It was always heartbreaking to see her strong, proud and strict older brother like this. But at least, he visited her… unlike their father.

So, Noelle couldn’t tell if she missed anyone truly within her closest family. In the Silva household, it was the other two cats she missed the most. Especially Leviathan, who had been Nozels gift on her last birthday in November. A beautiful long-haired Nebelung with kind of an attitude like a stormy sea, but so affectionate. Silvas usually weren’t liked by animals, it was actually a miracle that three cats came to love them.

And maybe Noelle also missed Rosette a bit, Solids fiancée.

It was an arranged betrothal, like how it was still the norm for rich people. Noelle couldn’t understand that, it was the 21st century and even the middle ages weren’t that strict on marital topics like the rich society of Clover. She didn’t know how it happened, given the fights Nozel had with father about it, it had been certainly complicated, somehow things happened and end of story, the betrothed moved into the Silva household.

But Rosette Vitrail was not at all an arrogant bitch like Noelle feared at first. On the contrary, she was kind and polite to everyone, even to Solid, loved the three cats who loved her back, respected the servants, she never tried to slime in and at first it was almost like she was invisible. Noelle assumed that Rosette didn’t choose the situation either and decided to make the best out of it. Even though her fiancé was Solid. And she never felt that unhappy to have left her family already.

Maybe she came from a broken household too? Not a good change to live now in another one, but Rosette didn’t seem to mind. But she was still a bit a mystery, she just moved in just one month ago.

But Noelle liked Rosette at least a bit. She didn’t had a distant, proud and almost sad glance like Nebra or the jerk attitude of Solids. And certainly not the superior, arrogant and disgusted glare of their father.

“Are you alright, Noelle?”

Noelle flinched slightly. Like always when Nozel talked to her out of the blue. How much she would love to get rid of this habit. After all, it was her dear older brother talking, not Nebra or Solid. Or worse, father.

“I’m fine, brother. Just been thinking.”

“Are you happy to come home?”

“I admit that I am. Oh, those two weeks together were great, but I miss my friends still and school… And Waterlily and Leviathan too. But I don’t think that Canelle would like to see them again.”

“Meow!”

It sounded like a protest. Noelle watched happily how Nozels lips went slightly up and she couldn’t help but smile as she turned towards the cat lying next to her. Canelle glared at her with her yellow eyes, like offended by the statement.

Canelle was looking so adorable with her heart-shaped head, her cinnamon brown fur, the white paws and belly, her big eyes and her rather tiny frame. But Noelle was sure that there was no cat with a personality like Canelle. She was the boss in their house, not only over the other cats, but in a way also of them. A few months ago, she had been quite sick and needed to rest. Instead of remaining in the cat chamber, she claimed Nebras bedroom all for herself and end of the story was that Nebra had to move into one of the guest rooms for two weeks until Canelle was better. One of the few rare times in their family were there had been some genuine laughs.

Canelle was not a cat of breed and this was already strange for a strict rich family like them. If any strict rich Clover family had animals, then of breed, please. The other cats of the Silvas were a Nebelung and a Ragdoll. But Noelle was glad that they got Canelle and even Nebra and Solid didn’t care that one of their pets wasn’t of a breed.

It was Solid who brought Canelle home and not even on purpose. This cat had been just a kitten when they got her, living on the streets and on one rainy day, she followed Solid for some reason, so close that she get into the villa the same time as him. And just decided to stay. After some time, Nozel finally decided that they should keep her, since she was determined to stay.

Given the colour of her fur, they named her Canelle, the french word for cinnamon. Noelles choice, as she was rather proud of her skills in that language.

Petting her head, Noelle remembered how Asta had been so excited when she told him about Canelle for the first time. He adored cats and his own, Liebe…

No, stop! Hadn’t she decided to not think about that idiot until they see each other again in school? And even there, if she could ignore him, but it was impossible, they were in the same class and just before the holidays, he had a date with Mimosa, her own cousin! This is what she got for crushing on a dense idiot and being in denial. Someone else got him and Asta couldn’t stop friendzone her and he didn’t even know he did!

Whoever said that friendzone wasn’t that bad was wrong. It was so damn worse than being hated! At least in Noelles books.

She heard that Mimosa went with her brother and her mother to Raque during the holidays. And she certainly invited Asta too. The mere thought of them cuddling at the beach… Or having fun in the sea…

Noelle sighed again. She hated feeling jealous. Mimosa was way too kind to be mad at, Asta was stupid but nicer than anyone she knew. Noelle couldn’t hate any of them and she wanted to be happy for them. After all, Asta didn’t belonged to her, he was free to choose who he would date and Mimosa was never mean to him, unlike Noelle.

But it was still a pain.

“Noelle?”

“Oh, sorry, brother. Did you say something?”

“No, but you seem thoughtful. Is something bothering you?”

Noelle bit her lips. Nozel might be the one of her family she was the closest to, but it was still difficult for the two of them to open to each other. Like any Silva, they had their own issues to deal with. It had been like this since she was a baby.

Oh, Noelle would love to tell Nozel about her love problems. But she didn’t know if he could be of any help or comfort, nor if he would be happy that she was crushing on someone out of their circles. Nozel still had a lot of pride, after all.

But he was still her brother and until she met Vanessa or Nero again, or waiting for Kahono to be back from her tour in Switzerland, Noelle had only Nozel to at least confide in a bit. Just a bit, she was a Silva after all.

Not something to be proud of, at least Noelle sometimes felt that way.

“I had… well, I had a difference with one of my classmates. Nothing important, though.”

Not quite the truth, not quite a lie. This should be enough.

“Did that classmate of yours insulted you? Shall I have a talk with that person?”

“No, no need to. But thank you still, brother. We didn’t had a fight and he probably… doesn’t remember our difference or haven’t even realized it. But I needed some distance and your proposition was a perfect opportunity for that. I will… see how it goes once school starts again.”

“If you don’t want to go to public school anymore, you can just tell me, I will arrange that.”

“I know, but there is no need. I still like my school and I’m happy that I can to go to the same school like you did. And Nebra and Solid.”

“It had been mother’s wish that we go to the public school and not a private one.”

“And it was probably a good idea. I have friends at least and there is Mimosa too. I want to finish school with them.”

“I’m glad that you have friends, Noelle.”

There was a tone in his voice that was almost sad. As if he wanted to say more or something else. Noelle always wondered if Nozel was lonely. Sure, he had friends, like Fuegoleon Vermillion or Vanessas roommate, Dorothy Unsworth. Such a small world. But still, even with friends, he could seem lonely.

And Noelle was worried for her big brother. She just had no idea how to help him. She was just a teenager, how could she help a full-grown adult?

There was not a lot she could do.

“Have you finished the last corrections on your manuscript?”

“Yes, I’ve sent it to Mr. Novachrono already. If everything goes like usual, it shall come to the market next month.”

“I’m looking forward to it, you write so well,” Noelle smiled and felt some relief when Nozel smiled back at her.

She was the only one in the family to know that secret of Nozel. She found it out some time ago and since then, it was more than just a secret between them, it was something like they were a bit like accomplices and Noelle loved that feeling.

Not to mention that she might be Nozels biggest fan and even though he never said it, her support meant a lot to him. She saw it in his eyes every time she talked about his works and what she loved the most.

Sometimes she wanted to share it with her friends, but this was not her secret to reveal. And it felt good to know something they didn’t, especially Astas arrogant best friend Yuno who was such a genius in everything.

And now she thought about Asta again, just like that. Why couldn’t she just stop? Why was Asta everywhere? She almost hated him for putting her in such a pathetic state, but then again, it wasn’t his fault and he didn’t know.

But Noelle still wanted to be mad at him, on principle. At least a bit.

“Meow!”

Canelle suddenly stood up and hoped down the bench, patting her cat bag and looking at them with some impatience. Which meant in her eyes, it was time to continue to return home. And she would pester Noelle and Nozel until they got their things together.

“Seems that we have to finish our meal,” Nozel said as he stood up as well and put the rest of their picnic back in the bag.

Noelle sighed deeply as she looked at the two chocolate-banana muffins. They looked so delicious and creamy, the old cook back at the secondary residence backed them at dawn especially for them.

“We can still eat the muffins on the way.”

Noelle beamed. Nozel must have seen her ogling very obviously on those muffins and since he was a sweettooth too… Noelle grabbed the muffins plus the cat bag and followed her brother who carried the picnic bag, while Canelle was already at the car, waiting for them with a grumpy look. She certainly almost had a Silva personality, but at least she didn’t act like a spoiled princess like Waterlily or like a stormy sea like Leviathan.

When they reached Nozels silver Porsche, Noelle immediately opened one of the doors so that Canelle could just jump in and into her cat bag once Noelle put it on the back seat. Then she entered the car herself, sitting at the front next to Nozel who just started the car.

Well, time to go home. With a bit of mixed feelings still, but Noelle was grateful that she had still more things to look forward to back in Clover. Even though Asta was currently not fitting into one of the two categories.

Stop, Noelle! Stop thinking about this idiot!

The siblings were silent when they left the picnic area and went back on the road. Even Canelle was silent, but maybe she fell asleep. That cat was always calm in the car, unless she had to be brought to the veterinary. Then the meowing would never stop and she would refuse any petting.

“Did you make nice photos during our vacation?” Nozel suddenly asked once they were back on the road.

Noelle smiled. As subtle as it might was, she was so happy that her brother supported her with her hobby.

“I think so, I’ll work on them once we get home. Thank you for helping taking pictures of myself too. Some of the servants also helped to-“

Noelle bit her lips. Maybe she shouldn’t have mentioned that. Nozel was never keen on befriending the servants back in Clover, it certainly also count for the once at their second villa. Noelle didn’t really understood why they couldn’t befriend servants, but she still hoped that it won’t destroy the fragile bond she had with her brother.

But to her biggest surprise, Nozel didn’t scold her. He just nodded and sighed, almost more to himself than to her, “It is wonderful that they helped. Those servants were always loyal to mother.”

Noelle flinched, like always when mother was mentioned. She still was curious, why would Nozel made an exception for the servants working at the secondary Silva residence? But she wouldn’t ask, mother was never a happy subject.

Nozel seemed a bit sad, so Noelle handed him one of the chocolate-banana muffins. Her brother smiled as he accepted it. Noelle relaxed at the sight and bit in her own. It was actually good to go home.

If only Asta…

And shit, now she was thinking about Asta again! Noelle was really fed up with those stupid thought. Okay, maybe she would stop if she would finally start to actively move on from her crush for him.

After all, it was just a teenage crush, nothing she would regret in a few days.

Right?

♣♣♣

Charlotte opened the door to her appartement, she could hear a lot of yells and screams and laughs from the living room.

This could only mean that Luck invited some friends to play some video-games. Probably Magna and Asta, given how loud it was.

Hopefully they wouldn’t end up destroying the TV or anything else. Not that many of these things were irreplaceable, of course not. But Charlotte preferred to not put this kind of finances on her budget.

“HAHAHA! I got you Magna! Now fight me!”

“No, I’m not fighting you, stopping attacking me with the controller! And no, you didn’t got me! You just cheated!”

“How can anyone cheat at a videogame? Oh no, Magna watch out, your ship is going towards a rock!”

“UAAH! Phew, thanks Asta. Ah, shit, you two are already this far ahead of me! Oh hell no, I’m not going to lose!”

Charlotte took a look in the living room. Ah, yes, Luck and his two friends were indeed gaming. Sails of Waves, a newer game a bit like Mario Karts, but with ships instead and a setting that was a mix of Pirates of the Caribbean, One Piece and corsairs & pirates of the 17th and 18th century.

Thankfully this was a rather harmless game, in comparison. Charlotte knew the creator very well, she went to school with him and Jack had a habit of being very bloody and scary in the games he created.

To think that he also opened a toy shop & atelier years ago…

Charlotte sighed and shook her head. She just came home from her tearoom and given how some of her girls were either on vacation or sick – stupid spring cold, really – they only had been three to be here for the customers.

And Sunday was one of the best days for the Blue Rose tearoom. So she was exhausted and since she forgot to buy bread and milk on her weekly grocery shopping, Charlotte had to go to the only shop open on Sunday in Clover, the small supermarket at the train station, on the opposite of her appartement.

But she could live with that. After all, it wouldn’t be the first time something like that happened. But she had to meet Yami today on her way home.

Yami…

Charlotte had a deep sigh as she put the milk in the fridge and the bread into the bread box. Goodness, why was she unable to spend even one day without thinking about him? One hour would already be a record.

Just one hour without feeling the heavy love that hasn’t left her for like a decade. Ten years living with that! Others were well able to move on from a one-sided love and crush more than once in such a period of time, then why was she unable to?

If her life would have been a fantasy story, maybe she would have been curse and falling in love with Yami would have lifted it. It was ridiculous, but it often felt that way for Charlotte. Maybe she read too much of Nymphea Silber’s romantasy novels in her youth. Rather pathetic for a grown adult woman, wasn’t it?

Yami…

Why was she still so worked up about that stupid crush after ten years in the first place? It wasn’t like the rest of her life was hell in any way. She was independent from her family and their stupid business, not to mention she cut most ties with the Roseleis, her tearoom and little fencing school worked amazingly, she had a nice and big appartement, fought for and won her younger half-brothers custody… her life was pretty good so far.

If she could finally get a grip about that stupid crush, it would be perfect.

But how? By moving on? By daring to ask him out directly? By deciding if it was just a crush or something more?

Always those questions and Charlotte was unable to find a proper answer. She was really pathetic, wasn’t she.

Why did had to be him? And why did she not wanted to be anyone else than him?

Maybe this was the never ending hurdle of being in love with terribly dense man. Oh yes, Yami was dense, terribly dense, so dense that despite his claims to be good at reading people, he was unable to tell if someone was in love with him.

Oh, it was easy to put all the blame on him. But Charlotte was well aware and smart enough to know that she wasn’t innocent either. How many times had she been rude to Yami to hide her feelings? How many times had she – often with reasons – been frustrated by his carefree behavior in everything? And made him know? How many times had she told him that work was her only partner?

Yes, she was quite to blame as well for her frustrated romantic situation. Would it have been sorted out much earlier if Yami wasn’t dense and less carefree? But would she be in love with him if he was any different?

Love was complicated and like hope, not rational at all.

“Meow!”

Charlotte looked up and saw Briar on the table, looking at her with some impatience within her beautiful green eyes. Briar was one the three cats Charlotte and Luck had, a beautiful tortoiseshell cat with a black and orange fur.

“Hello, Briar. I know that it is time for your dinner, but I think we had agreed that you shouldn’t jump on the kitchen table.”

Briar seemed to pout, but still jumped of the table, sitting down in front of her bowl and waited. Charlotte smiled as she took Briars favourite food, a mash with chicken flavour. Seems that someone was really hungry.

And of course, as soon as Briar started to eat, Lightning appeared suddenly in the kitchen. She was also a tortoiseshell cat, but unlike Briar, the eyes were amber and the fur was black, grey and white.

“Okay, okay. I will give you your dinner as well. Dry food with fish for you, right?”

Lightning meowed happily, while hoping up and down. She was almost as excited as Luck. After giving Lightning her food, Charlotte left the kitchen to join the boys in the living room. It felt good to feed the cats, they were always distracting her from her unresolved romantic frustration with Yami.

And now, she thought about him again. Why was it so easy to think about him and so difficult to stop?

Charlotte sometimes wondered if she really had puberty completely behind her.

When she entered the living room, the boys were still playing their video game. Given the image on the TV, they were currently on the storm level of the game. Luck and Magna were even jumping. Asta might have done it as well, if it weren’t for the long-haired grey cat napping on his lap.

Ah, there was their third cat. Charlotte and Luck did receive Queen as a kitten roughly six months ago, from a great-aunt who spent most of their time traveling the world and who didn’t cared that Charlotte cut ties with most of the Roseleis or that Luck was an illegitimate child, born out of an affair.

Queen was the only breed cat they had, a beautiful Russian Blue with the characteristic blue-grey fur and green eyes, and very affectionate. Asta seemed to love her too, as he sometimes put his controller aside to pet Queen a bit, even though his own ship lost some speed. Yes, he was a kind boy and Charlotte was glad that Luck was friends with him.

She didn’t had quite the same feeling about Magna, though, he and Luck were always fighting a lot, plus Magna was kind of almost a delinquent and even more or less proud of it. Not something Charlotte appreciated. But at the same time, it was mostly Luck who provoked Magna, not the other way around and this boy still had his heart at the right place. And Yami trusted him.

Yami again… She just couldn’t stop thinking about him. Maybe was it because of spring? This season was always considered the lovers season in Clover. Great, now she started to believe those stupid traditions of people.

She needed another distraction, right now.

“Hello, boys.”

“Bis Sis, you’re back!!!”

“Luck don’t jump on me, you little fucker… Oh shoot, hi, erm, I mean, hello Mrs, no, Miss Roselei! I wasn’t insulting your brother, I swear!”

“Hello, madam Charlotte, sir!”

Charlotte almost laughed as Asta somehow tried to salute. With the controller in his hands and Queen on his lap. She couldn’t blame him, she probably appeared like some kind of strict military officer when Luck brought him home for the first time. Which she was probably still a bit for him.

“Did you have fun playing Sails of Waves?”

“Yes, madam Charlotte, sir, I mean-“

“Asta, please, just Charlotte for you. How many times shall I tell you that?”

“But that wouldn’t be polite, madam Charlotte, sir… Oh no, I shouldn’t say sir to you, I apologize!”

“Don’t scream like that, Asta, you’re scaring the kitty!”

Magna said while yelling himself. But Queen was a calm cat, she just yawned before turning around and continuing to nap.

“How was your day at the tearoom, Big Sis?”

“Rather exhausting. It’s Sunday, not to mention spring holidays, so we had a lot to do at the tearoom. Especially since most of the girls were either sick or on vacation today. We were only three, let’s hope there will be more next week.”

Charlotte really hoped that, because one of the most productive seasons will just get started for her tearoom and the Blue Rose couldn’t be with just three waitresses every day during that season.

Not to mention that it was also a season were a lot of couples, from teenagers to old people, to have dates at the tearoom, which wouldn’t help Charlottes current mental state of romantic frustration concerning Yami and…

And she did it again. What has she ever done in some potential previous life to deserve this?

“Hey, Big Sis, if you want I can help you out sometimes!”

“Only if you promise to not attack costumers out of the blue. Remember what happened last time? If you want to help me, please behave?”

“Not even a little kick between the legs?”

“No.”

“Ah, but okay.”

“Maybe we could help you too!” Asta said with a big kind grin. “I never worked in a tearoom, but sister Lily always said that the more experience I have, the more I can go far in life after school!”

“I’m not that much into tearooms, but if you need manly help, maybe I can jump in?” Magna added, forgetting the game for a moment and not noticing that his boat was trapped into a maelstrom. “I’m helping out three times a week at the Black Bulls Motorcycle Garage, but I’m sure captain Yami will agree that I help one of his old classmates. After all, captain Yami is great!”

“Oh, you work with Yami? And you call him captain?”

“Yeah, it sounds manly! Oh crap, what is happening to my boat?”

While Magna tried to save his ship under Lucks laughs and Astas encouragement, Charlotte took a deep breath. Oh yes, Yami did mention that sometimes students were helping him out at his garage. He did this to help young people and give them a chance, as he said and this was one of the side she admired about him.

If only… If only…

Yami won’t leave her thoughts, wouldn’t he? Even if she hadn’t met him to day after doing her groceries, he would always haunt her mind. Gosh, their meeting today hadn’t even been long, he just teased her and she fled, like always.

This couldn’t continue like this! But at the same time, Charlotte had no idea how to change her whole romantic mess of the mind. Maybe she needed therapy? No, it couldn’t be that desperate. But nothing else came to her mind.

Well, then she needed to try distracting herself again, even though it never worked really. But what other option does she have?

“Can I play with you, boys?”

“Really, that’s so cool of you, Big Sis!”

“Here, sit next to me, madam Charlotte, sir! Oh, sorry, I said sir again!”

“We’ll show you how it works, maybe we can start all over again. That’s the neat thing with this game, it’s not a bother to start all over again. First, you need to design your own ship.”

Under the explanations of Luck and his friends, Charlotte tried to use a controller and to create her own ship. Next to Lucks Thunder Goods Boots, Magnas Crazy Cyclone and Astas Black Meteor, a new ship was now ready to sail.

Prickly Queen.

It was only when a new race started that Charlotte realized it. She gave her ship the very nickname Yami always gave her.

♣♣♣

When Lital woke up, there was a tongue licking all over her face. A tongue that didn’t belonged to her boyfriend, but to a flame red stripped cat.

“Hello, Salamander. What’s the big idea to wake me up in the middle of the night, you little rascal?”

The cat just meowed, before making himself comfortable on the pillow next to her. But the other side of the bed was empty.

Not that Lital could see much. First, the lights were off. Second, her bangs weren’t braided and like always when loose, it covered most of her eyes.

But Lital could feel it still. It was empty, but the sheets were still warm. Which means that he was still here. Of course he was.

“Fue, where are you?”

“Right here, my dearest.”

Pushing some of her bangs away, Lital saw Fuegoleon standing at the window, only wearing his shorts, his hair unkempt but still so softly looking. The lights of the city coming from outside barely came into the room, but it was enough for Lital to admire his muscles, the wonderful red of his hair, his proud back, his big and elegant hands, one of his arms leaning against the window frame, looking outside without really seeing the lights of Clover or the night traffic, which noises sounded like coming from far away.

Yawning, Lital stood up, took his undershirt that was lying on the carpet floor and put it on, before joining Fuegoleon, hugging him from behind. She still wasn’t quite sure on her feet and he must have felt it.

“Have I been too rough with you? I’m sorry.”

“Not at all. I’m just still very tired. It is just passed midnight, after all.”

“I didn’t want to wake you up.”

“It wasn’t you, but Salamander.”

Lital heard him chuckle and it seemed like he turned his head to look at the bed.

“Salamander, how many times have I told you to not wake up my beloved in the middle of the night?”

“Meow!”

Lital and Fuegoleon just laughed softly at the protest of the cat. But sadly, it was short lived. And she knew exactly what was bothering the man she loved.

“I’m sorry that you had this fight with your grandfather today.”

“It was bound to happen and it is certainly not your fault, darling. I just wish I could have gone through him. But you know how stubborn he is. And he probably already forgot about our little fight already. Like with everything that doesn’t fit in his views.”

Well… that sounded very much like Achilles Vermillion, from what Lital heard of him.

Fuegoleon sighed. “I still care for my grandfather. But I fear it becomes more and more difficult for me to really love him. Mereoleona was right to just leave, cut ties with him and do her own thing.”

“She didn’t cut ties with a lot of the family and your grandfather is still too afraid of her to cut her out of his will.”

“Yes… I really thought that I could try to persuade him, after he was such a good mood about that contract with this rich family form Diamond. But… Augustus had to be with him today. And Nozels father. I don’t need to tell you that my rather liberal request came at a bad time. I wasn’t even direct, you know why.”

Lital couldn’t help but hug Fuegoleon even tighter. He really didn’t need to tell her. She knew exactly what this meant for them.

“We still have to be in secrecy for a while longer.”

It wasn’t a question, just a fact. Fuegoleon didn’t answered, but he still put a comforting hand on her arms.

Lital sighed deeply. She wasn’t surprised, but still terribly sad. It was just so unfair and so stupid. This was the 21stcentury, marrying out of duty, power or money should be a thing of the past since so long already.

Too bad that the majority of the rich society in Clover was somehow more strict than the middle ages about that topic.

It wasn’t her fault she was born in the slums, it wasn’t her fault that she was illegitimate. This didn’t determined who she was. But enough for many people in this town to consider her unworthy for one of the heirs of the Vermillion family, one of the three most powerful rich families in Clover.

At least, they would say that if they would knew. But Lital and Fuegoleon kept their relationship in secrecy so far. Only a handful of people knew and after ten years, their love just grew stronger and deeper.

But Lital didn’t want to be in secrecy. She wanted to be at Fuegoleons side for the rest of her life and show it to the world. She wanted to marry him, grew old with him. Simple things, but so important and yet still considered flimsy by this stupid rich society.

Fuegoleon wanted it as well. They have talked about it so much more since a few months. Their wish really wasn’t too much to ask for and yet…

Lital felt like she would start to cry. It was just so frustrating. And after today… It would have worked if Fuegoleon would have managed to convince his grandfather. But circumstances played again against them.

She was very close to not consider spring a happy and romantic season anymore.

Fuegoleon suddenly turned in her arms and cupped her face, brushing her bangs away. His beautiful purple eyes just showed the same sadness and frustration she was feeling, but there was still hope in them, this familiar resolution to not give up.

And the love he had for her.

“I’m as upset as you are, Lital. But do not give up. I certainly won’t. We haven’t come this far for nothing. We’ll continue to fail until we succeed. I love you and I won’t let one defeat take everything away.”

Lital couldn’t help but smile. This man could always feel the right words to comfort her. No wonder she fell in love with him all those years ago.

She leaned against him, savouring his presence, his strength, his determination. It was good to know that they won’t give up, that they could lean on each other each time they felt down. Lital closed her eyes.

“Fue, don’t you have sometimes the feeling that we are a couple from like a fantasy or a historical romance novel? Something like that.”

“Rather ridiculous, isn’t it? We are in the 21st century, after all.”

“It’s not us who made the situation rather ridiculous.”

“I know.”

There was silence again, more comforting this time. They just hold each other, the noise of the night traffic sounding from far away. Lital felt a bit ashamed that she felt so quickly frustrated for a moment. Almost as if it wasn’t worth it.

But it was worth it, she realized it every day again.

“Fue.”

“Hm?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

The next moment, his lips were on hers for a short, loving kiss. A bit desperate maybe, but determined and so sweet. Just as fiery as all the passionate kisses they shared a few hours before.

When their lips parted, Fuegoleon rested his forehead against hers. “Let’s forget about our worries for tonight, my love. Tomorrow is another day.”

“Can I have cuddles before we fell asleep.”

“As you wish.”

Fuegoleon carried her up bridal style towards the bed. They cuddled and kissed a bit before falling asleep. Fuegoleon fell asleep first and Lital felt her own eyes closing quickly as well, when a thought crossed her mind before slumber took over her.

I hope no other couple will have the same difficulties we are facing right now.

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