#Feelin' Lava-ly | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

professorpalmarosa · 6 years

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Feelin’ Lava-ly (Maxie - Team Magma)

I wanted Maxie’s blend to be spicy, but also earthy. Since I used Cassia Cinnamon as the key ingredient in Martian to a Different Drum (my blend for Commander Mars of Team Galactic), I vowed I wasn’t going to use it. It was much too sweet for Team Magma’s boss, anyway!

I selected Myrrh (a sap-like tree resin with an amber-like smell) as my main oil for the blend. Frankincense (its more famous cousin) blends with virtually everything. Myrrh’s a bit more peppery and doesn’t play as nicely with as many smells.

Originally, I wanted to use Ginger (for its warm, earthy smell) in the blend, but opted instead to use one of its lesser known cousins: Finger Root. Finger Root smells a bit earthier and paired nicely with the Myrrh.

By this point, the blend smelled bitter and like a bunch of dried roots. I needed to give it a bit more spice and heat to round it out! I used about 10 drops of Red Thyme to add some “flavor” to the blend, and then proceeded to christen the rest of the blend with CO2 supercritical Turmeric.

(And if you don’t know what CO2 Supercritical means, that’s okay. It’s just a process that makes a stronger, purer, more intense oil with a longer shelf life).

The Myrrh and Turmeric are what you smell predominantly in the blend. Once it hits the water, it’s a gorgeous rich crimson. Imagine you’re bathing in a hot tub of lava, or the blood of your Team Aqua enemies.

Now it’s time to talk about the pros and cons of these oils from a safety perspective…

Aromatherapy isn’t just about pretty smells and scented bath water. Essential oils are in such a high concentration that even absorbing them through your skin can leave you with the therapeutic (and potentially toxic) benefits.

If you are allergic to a plant, you are 100% without question going to be super allergic to the essential oil.

There’s also such a thing as contraindications: where some oils may affect you in weird ways if you have a certain medical condition or take certain medications.

The information below is for your safety if you want to attempt to make this blend at home (as a bath bomb, a body spray, or even scented bath salts). And do be sure to wear gloves. Some of these oils have recommended dilution rates as small as 0.4%. You don’t want that to slide on bare skin!

Myrrh Essential Oil (40% of Synergy)

Myrrh (like Elemi and Frankincense) is a resin that comes out of cuts in the bark of Commiphora trees. It’s primarily used to make medicine and is one of the most ancient (and most purchased) essential oils on the planet.

For Christians, the name may sound familiar. Myrrh was one of the three gifts provided to the baby Jesus by the Three Kings. It was a symbolic gift, seeing as myrrh was used (at the time) for embalming purposes. Pros: Myrrh is used to treat stomach problems (indigestion, ulcers), respiratory problems (cough, asthma, colds), pain problems (arthritis), cancer, leprosy, spasms, and even syphilis. You can also use it as a stimulant and to increase menstrual flow (making it perfect for cramps and endometriosis).

With a carrier oil, myrrh can be applied to sores, wounds, boils, and abrasions. It cuts down on inflammation. It’s one of my all-time favorites for my occasional fibromyalgia flares. Myrrh digs in deep and melts the aches and pains away!

Cons: Myrrh has several potential health warnings, so please read this section with care.

Some people experience nausea when exposed to myrrh. If ingested (not that you should EVER take essential oils internally without your doctor’s recommendation), myrrh can cause diarrhea.

Although small doses are considered safe for the general public, excessive use and abuse of the oil could result in heart and kidney complications.

If you are pregnant or breast-feeding, avoid using Myrrh Essential Oil until your baby is safely weaned. Myrrh stimulates menstrual flow and may cause a miscarriage. Breast-feeding parents should avoid myrrh, since it’s not a baby-safe oil.

If you are diabetic or taking diabetic medication, you need to understand that Myrrh Essential Oil might lower your blood sugar. Please monitor your blood sugar carefully if you’re using this oil.

If you have heart problems, large amounts of myrrh may impact your heart rate (and not in a good way). Get your healthcare provider’s advice before using this essential oil.

If you plan to have surgery in the next 2 weeks, avoid using Myrrh Essential Oil. Myrrh might interfere with blood glucose control during and after surgery.

If you have a uterine bleeding condition, exercise caution when using Myrrh Essential Oil, as it may worsen your condition.

Lastly, Warfarin (Coumadin) interacts with Myrrh. This drug is used to slow blood clotting. Using Myrrh Essential Oil on the regular might decrease how well warfarin (Coumadin) works and could increase the chance of blood clotting.

Turmeric Essential Oil (25% of Synergy)

If you aren’t familiar with Turmeric, you may be familiar with its smell: as it is the key ingredient in curry and many Indian cuisines. It has a spicy, savory, and flavorful aroma that makes you think of hot foods.

Pros:

Turmeric has wonderful pain relief properties! People can use it for joint pain, arthritis, abdominal pain, fibromyalgia, headaches, and menstrual cramps. I’ll add it to my lotion on cramping days, but I’ve been holding off on it lately because I’m trying to lose a little weight and Turmeric makes me hungry.

Relieve digestive upset! It’s great for constipation, diarrhea, intestinal gas, nausea, and loss of appetite. If you’re feeling a little queasy, Turmeric might be your new best friend.

Reduce inflammation! Bloat, retained water, bladder inflammation—Turmeric is here to help you!

Cons:

If you suffer from gallbladder problems, you may want to avoid using Turmeric essential oil, as it may worsen your condition.

Curcurmin (a chemical inside Turmeric) may lower your blood sugar. If you are diabetic, you may want to exercise caution when using this essential oil for prolonged periods. Be sure your blood sugar looks good to go before you use the bath bomb.

Turmeric essential oil may slow blood clotting. If you are taking blood thinners, this blend may not be for you. Also, if you are going to have surgery in the next couple of weeks or just had surgery, don’t use this oil.

Although Turmeric essential oil is considered generally safe, some people have complained about diarrhea when exposed to large quantities. This bath bomb shouldn’t do that to you.

If you have any estrogen or hormone-related conditions (such as breast cancer), don’t use this oil.

Finger Root Essential Oil (20% of Synergy)

Finger Root is a cousin to Ginger and has a slightly earthier smell. It’s also more camphorous than Ginger, as well as has a mildly floral after-scent.

Pros:

Like Ginger, Finger Root works wonders for nausea and digestive upset. If you’re feeling a little queasy and ginger doesn’t do the trick, maybe consider giving finger root a try!

Finger Root is a calming aroma, and works well for meditation, stress relief, and anger management.

Finger Root has decongestant properties and may be able to help you if you’ve got a stuffy nose, any type of nasal drip, or a sinus-related headache.

Finger Root works wonders for your hair and scalp, too. If you suffer from dry winter skin or a flaky scalp, consider putting a drop or two of this essential oil into your shampoo or conditioner!

Cons:

Due to its elevated camphor content, this is not a cat-safe essential oil.

Finger Root may increase your insulin levels, so monitor your blood sugar carefully if you are diabetic or on diabetes-related medications.

Very high dosages of Finger Root may worsen some heart conditions, but bathing in a bath powder shouldn’t be enough to trigger this kind of reaction.

Prolonged usage of Finger Root may increase your risk of bleeding.

A small percentage of the population have reported a dermal sensitivity to Finger Root, but it is generally considered to be universally safe.

Red Thyme Essential Oil (15% of Synergy)

Red Thyme has an unforgettable, warm, herbal smell reminiscent of a dry rub or your first real scents of autumn air. It conjures up thoughts of walking through a forest full of dead, dry leaves on the first cold evening of the season.

Pros:

The medical benefits of Thyme have been known to the Mediterranean part of the world for thousands of years. It is also a commonly prescribed herb in Ayurvedic Medicine.

Alleviate several illnesses! Red Thyme can be used to relieve and reduce the impact of chronic ailments such as gout, chronic fatigue syndrome, menstrual and menopausal problems, and athlete’s foot. It’s also a lovely hangover cure.

It has antidepressant properties! Red Thyme has an anti-anxiety component to its chemical makeup. When diffused or applied with a carrier oil, it can reduce the impact of depression, strengthen cognition, and calm jittery nerves.

It’s an asthma-safe oil and works wonders on respiratory problems! Got a nasty autumn cough you can’t shake? What about the early signs of a sore throat? Red Thyme may be able to help you. It certainly does for me!

Improve your skin! Red Thyme can reduce the amount of sebum your pores extract, meaning it can reduce your chances for acne or sebaceous cysts. It can clear up oily skin, as well as speed up the healing process for scars. As for aged skin, Red Thyme is a wonderful toner.

Reduce hair loss! Red Thyme, when added to shampoos and other hair products, can reduce or even prevent hair loss for some people.

It can be used to improve your oral health! Like Peppermint, Spearmint, Eucalyptus, Rosemary, Lemon, and Wintergreen, Red Thyme Essential Oil can be added to a mouthwash or oral rinse to fix bad breath and improve the health of your gums.

Bugs HATE Red Thyme, so keep the creepy-crawlies at bay! Mosquitoes, lice, moths, ticks, and fleas in particular hate Red Thyme. That said, I really wish roaches were on that list. Your best oil for that is still Peppermint.

Cons

The good news is that there are very few side effects to Red Thyme Essential Oil. It is generally safe for most people to use, but it’s never a bad idea to first consult your physician before adding essential oils to your daily health routine.

This is not a cat-friendly oil. In fact, Red Thyme is listed in several places as one of the worst things you can diffuse around your cat. As much as I love this essential oil, I always lock Gaius out of the room if I choose to diffuse this one.

Some people are allergic to thyme. It’s actually not that uncommon. If you are allergic to other plants in the Lamiaceae family (Basil, Sage, Rosemary, Lavender, etc.), you may have a sensitivity to Red Thyme Essential Oil. Allergies may surface as gastrointestinal issues (fussy stomach, diarrhea, nausea, or vomiting) if ingested.

If you have sensitive skin, do not apply Red Thyme neat to your skin. While Red Thyme is generally safe, some people have experienced inflammation, hives, rashes, itchiness, and redness when the oil is applied to the skin without being properly diluted with a carrier oil. The good news is that Thyme Machine contains fractionated coconut oil as a carrier. If that doesn’t dilute the Thyme enough, the bath water will.

Red Thyme is an emmenagogue and should NOT be used by pregnant women. I use Red Thyme for a number of reasons. One of them is to regulate my period, as it’s started to come a bit more slowly since I started dieting in April (every 5 weeks instead of every 4). Red Thyme has emmenagogue properties, which means that it stimulates menstruation. Menstruation is something you do not want when you’re pregnant, as it could potentially be dangerous for the fetus or trigger premature labor or a miscarriage.

Exercise caution if you have hypertension. Red Thyme can be used to increase circulation, meaning your blood pressure may rise while using this oil. If you are already dealing with hypertension or experience palpitations on the regular, Red Thyme Essential Oil might not play nicely with you.

Exercise caution if you have hyperthyroidism. Red Thyme may stimulate the thyroid gland for some people.

#Feelin' Lava-ly #Maxie #Team Magma #Team Magma Bath Stuff #Skye makes bath bombs #Professor Palmarosa #ProfessorPalmarosa

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findingjoynweirdstuff · 3 years

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Dream SMP Recap (June 6/2021) - Techno’s Visit

It’s time for Techno to visit Dream in prison. After saying some parting words to Phil, Techno goes to Pandora’s Vault for the first time...

Later, Quackity, Puffy, Bad, Skeppy and Michael tour around Las Nevadas for a fun chill stream, and Quackity recruits Michael as a worker to build in the city.

A brief summary of the week’s total events can be found at the end of the post.

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VOD LINKS:

Technoblade

Ranboo

Captain Puffy

QuackityToo

Michaelmcchill

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- Techno goes to speak with Phil before he visits Dream

- Phil gets a horrible canonical headache and Techno offers him a canonical aspirin

- Phil isn’t sure going to the prison is a good idea, as every time someone’s gone something bad's happened, but Dream saved Techno’s life. Also views

- Phil has his concerns, but Dream called in the favor. Techno thinks he should go and check on him anyways, even without Quackity. Dream’s been in there for five months

- Phil offers his help, but Techno doesn’t want Phil to take any risks paying off his debt

- But there is something Phil can do: Techno wrote a will. He throws a signed book to Phil. Phil asks how many days he should wait. Techno says it varies. The instructions are in the will

Techno: “I took a vow. Those who treat me with kindness see it repaid tenfold...I gotta honor that.”

- He rings the channel member bell

- Techno wonders if he can bring Steve, but probably not. He says goodbye to Phil and heads off for the prison

- He makes it to the prison entrance and says hello to Sam, who welcomes him through the portal

- Techno says he’s come to visit Dream, but Sam says he’s not allowing people to visit right now. Techno throws Sam a book:

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FIELD TRIP SLIP

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Sam. Technoblade will be paying Dream a visit. This is business related. Let it happen.

It’s also tax write off :)

- Quackity

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- Techno reads the waiver aloud and signs it “Techno Blade”

- Sam then asks the questions:

“When is the last time you visited the prison?”

“I have not visited the prison before”

“Where is your place of residence currently located?”

“I live in like this cabin in the north, it’s pretty chill.”

“Do you believe that the prisoner is deserving of being locked up?”

“I’m gonna be honest, I have no idea why he’s in there, so...”

“Are you saying no?”

“I’m not saying, like, yes or no, I don’t really -- I’m not really up to date on the news recently, if I’m being honest.”

“What are your prior relations with the prisoner?”

“Yeah, we’ve been business associates I’d say, in the past, you know. I wouldn’t say I’m like friends with him, honestly -- he’s kinda sus...I’m not gonna lie, it does not surprise me at all that he ended up in a jail, ‘cause that guy -- he’s a little weird sometimes, you know. A little strange...So you know, it’s, eh...it’s up and down.”

- Sam gets to the last question, telling Techno he’s the ultimate authority on the grounds of the prison

Techno: “Oh I love authority, everyone can tell you that.”

- Techno goes to store his belongings in the locker. There’s a bed in an item frame now which he uses to set his spawn. Techno opens up his Ender Chest and stores all of his armor and weapons in it

- Having run out of space in the Ender Chest, Techno puts his remaining items in the locker chest: Potions, gapples, golden carrots, an Ender Chest, Ender Pearls and a stack of stone

Techno: “Well. You know, you seem like a trustworthy man.”

- They go through the security protocol. There’s a new Ender Pearl stasis chamber in the first room that wasn’t there before. Techno zooms in on it before it activates, teleporting Sam in

- Techno’s impressed with the prison’s design. He gets Sam to open the vault door a second time to admire it

- Techno signs the next waivers “sub to techno” as “Technoblade (subscribe to technoblade”

- Techno praises Sam’s creativity with the prison, comparing it to the Butcher Army’s simple execution platform

- The lava wall comes down. Dream isn’t facing them

- Techno walks with the moving platform to the cell. The second Dream sees him, he starts shouting

Techno: “Yo, Dream! Dream, what’s up!”

Dream: “TECHNO NO! NO!”

Techno: “No what?”

Dream: “QUACKITY -- it’s a trap! It’s a trap! Techno--”

Techno: “What about Quackity? Dream, you need to -- I haven’t seen you in a long time, Dream.”

Dream: “(muffled) Techno...He’s been torturing me I gotta -- I didn’t write that note.”

...

Techno: “I’m not gonna lie to you, Dream, I -- I kinda had a feelin’ he was lying, but I kinda had to visit anyways, just to see how you were doing, get to the truth of things, you know? You know? And besides, Quackity’s not even here, man.”

Dream: “...Why did you come?”

Techno: “I wanted to see you! I need to figure out what’s going on here, Dream, and between you and me, I’m an anarchist, so uh -- (looking to Sam) Can he hear me at this volume?”

Dream: “They’re working together...”

Techno: “Who?”

Dream: “Sam and Quackity!”

- Techno asks Dream to tell him everything. Neither the lava wall nor the Netherite barrier have lowered yet

- Techno looks back at Sam, asking how long he has to be in there for

Sam: “I think you could do with a nice long stay with Dream...you’re probably the main threat to uh -- to Dream escaping, aren’t you, ‘cause you know, the two of you have worked together before, and...”

Techno: “I...would never defy authority, alright. I. Love. Authority.”

Sam: “I think we both know that’s probably not true--”

Techno: “Everybody will tell you how much Technoblade loves authority figures.”

- Sam refuses to send the bridge back, saying the two of them will have some catching up to do. He sends the lava wall down

Techno: “Sam, this is NOT DOING MUCH TO CHANGE MY POLITICAL OPINIONS!”

(Dream freaks out in the background)

Techno: “...Alright. Well that was nice.”

- Dream panics. Techno tells him it’s fine, that they’re not out of options

Dream: “I have been in here for six months! What do you mean we’re not out of options, it’s fine -- how?!”

Techno: “Well I mean, maybe you’re out of options, but like I actually have friends now. I know I was kinda like a loser when we first met...”

- He finds the books and quills and tells Dream to write down everything he knows about the prison

Techno: “So...hows it goin’, roommate?”

Dream: (quietly) “Oh my god...”

- Techno seems optimistic about the new experience. Dream tells him he used to have a clock as Techno examines the cell

- Techno tells Dream to get to writing and ends stream

- Ranboo goes back home and is confused by how much the trees have grown. He thinks Phil probably has something to do with it and that he knows something, even though Phil isn’t doing it himself

- He then goes mining

- Quackity does a chill stream on the SMP working on the roads of Las Nevadas while chatting about lore out of character

- He walks down the Prime Path when he gets suddenly jumped by Skeppy and Bad, who attack him together. Quackity threatens to blow up their house

- Captain Puffy joins the fray and stops them

- Quackity offers Puffy and Michael a tour of his country

- He goes eating at McPuffy’s and Michael comes over to give him food as well

- There’s a hostile takeover of McPuffy’s and Bad declares it McSkeppy’s now. Quackity takes the drive-through instead

- Quackity orders a BTS meal and Bad hands him a steak “with extra cruelty”

- He starts walking them all over to his country, asking them what their expectations are (Quackity talking to Bad at this point is non-canonical) Skeppy wants a lot of ducks

- Quackity falls into the Punzo Chunk

- He tells them that his country isn’t even near done, and he’s going to need a lot of cheap labor. Skeppy says it doesn’t sound very enticing, but Quackity says he’ll give him all the ducks he’d want.

- Michael tells him about his experience with 2b2t

- Quackity shows him the concept of “the house always wins” (a picture of “Finding Doryto”)

- Quackity kills Skeppy and Skeppy logs off. Bad is horrified. Quackity tells Bad it isn’t his fault that Skeppy is dead as Bad buries Skeppy’s dropped things beneath the ground under the Needle

- Quackity shows the remaining people to the gambling machine, teaching them how it works

- Afterwards, he takes them to the strip club and starts stripping at the pole

- He takes Michael into the back, where he tries to mug Michael for his things. But Michael runs out the back door

- Quackity goes back to stripping and offers Bad to go into the back room for a “surprise.” He tries to mug Bad, but Bad goes running out the back door

- He returns to Puffy, defeated, and half-heartedly promises her a surprise in the back room too. Puffy, not at all suspicious, follows him and he tries to mug her. She gives him ink sacs, slabs, Ender Pearls and shears.

He shows her out the back door

- Afterwards, Quackity takes the three of them to the Tommyinnit Restaurant

- Then they go to the stage and Quackity puts on a “show” for them...

...Which is more stripping

- Next up is the hotel. There’s nothing in it, so he takes them to the pool outside. Bad almost drowns

- He wants to show them “something embarrassing,” so he brings them to Tommy and Wilbur’s headquarters

- Quackity then shows them the Eiffel Tower to conclude the country tour and they argue about a trident

- He suggests Michael and Puffy possibly build some structures around Las Nevadas and gathers them at the Needle. He shows Michael the empty plot next to Fundy’s area and says he needs something put there in return for some free spins at the casino. Michael’s down for that

- Quackity tells Puffy and Bad to help Michael build there. Bad asks how much he’s getting paid, and Quackity says he gets free spins at the casino too. Bad and Puffy start arguing again and Quackity leaves, having gained a new worker

- Bad and Puffy continue to argue about the trident

- Later, Michael builds a statue in Las Nevadas

END OF WEEK RECAP:

5/31 - Wilbur and Tommy visit Las Nevadas

6/1 - Ponk tears down a tower of L’Llamaburg, Tubbo builds an outpost, Techno’s birthday party, Quackity speaks with Foolish about Las Nevadas, Niki finds out about Wilbur’s revival, Bad and Puffy destroy the supreme fridge in an act of war

6/2 - Fundy speedruns self-care, Antfrost confronts Foolish, Bad and Puffy to apologize

6/3 - Nothing much happens.

6/4 - Ponk decides to sue Puffy and Bad, Pubbo

6/5 - Nothing much happens.

6/6 - Techno gets trapped in prison, Quackity tours Bad, Puffy, Skeppy and Michael around Las Nevadas

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Upcoming Events:

- The final Egg lore stream

- Tales From the SMP: “Space Race”

- Ponk’s lore stream

- Dream’s lore video

#dream smp #dream smp recaps #long posts

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littlekatleaf · 3 years

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I fretted fire

Awake late, feeling some kinda way, so must be writing Roadrat bits. This is pre-Buried in a burning flame

It’s not tonight Where I’m set alight And I blink in sight Of your blinding light ~ Hozier, Would That I

Roadhog rests the handle of the hoe against his leg, presses his fists to the small of his back, and stretches until he’s rewarded with a cracking relief of pressure. Thank Gods, the sun’s dipping close to the horizon, last rays reddened and dulled by the dust that coats everything. Still hotter than a shearer’s armpit though it must be half eight. Been working since dawn with only an hour or so rest in the hottest part of the arvo when Junkrat brought him a pint and a sanger.

Why he’s making this effort he can’t say - land so fucked with radiation and drought nothing’ll grow beyond a bit of Kangaroo Grass and the odd Boxthorn or Eucalyptus. But Junkrat’d gotten the idea in his head that Roadhog’s farm should be a farm. Without animals (Junkrat’s efforts at cattle rustling had, so far, failed), very least they could do would be grow some vegetables. Or something. Junkrat had been so caught by the idea that he’d actually bartered seeds from Bobby, who’d managed to keep Lisa’s garden alive even without her. Must’ve been some high value scrap, too - Bobby didn’t hand seeds to just anyone.

After all that work, Roadhog couldn’t bring himself to tell Junkrat no, so here he is, sweat pooling in the waistband of his jeans and burning his eyes, too much sun stinging along his shoulders. Unreasonably pleased at the neat rows he’s sown. Grow, don’t grow, he can’t control the plants any more than he can the weather… but he’s made the attempt. Junkrat swears he can rig up some sort of irrigation contraption, but Roadhog has his doubts. More than half suspects the claim is born of wanting to avoid the physical labor of planting. Prepping the field and actually sowing the seeds isn’t exactly an afternoon’s stroll, and even less so when the surrounding air feels straight off a barbie.

Lifts a hand to shade his eyes, gazes to the horizon, as if that’ll make the wished-for clouds gather. As if the puff of breeze is anything but hot and dry. Nothing to be seen but kilometers of arid waste. Another, longer, gust of wind, just as hot, lifts the hair from the back of his neck and sends another trickle of sweat down the center of his back. Roadhog frowns. Bushfire weather. The sky looms empty and flat. No hint of relief. But no smoke neither. Reckons it’d be safe enough, for now.

Heads to the house. Needs food and a shower, not necessarily in that order. Door to Junkrat’s workroom is closed but there’s no sounds of tinkering. Figures. No way he’s got enough scrap to actually build something that works.

Roadhog keeps the shower cold and the relief as it washes over him is exquisite. Still relishing the cool drops of water as they slide from the end of his ponytail and down the back of his neck, he rummages in the refrigerator for something to cook.

“Hungry, Rat?” he calls, but there’s no answer. Could be too immersed in plans to hear. Happens like that sometimes, like he’s swallowed whole by whatever’s caught his attention. So Roadhog doesn’t bother waiting for an answer, instead browning the last of the meat. He hums as he chops a couple of rather sad looking carrots, a zucchini that’s on the edge of edible, a capsicum and a few handfuls of wilted cabbage. Garlic, ginger, soy sauce sizzle in the wok and his stomach growls. To his surprise, though, even the scent of food doesn’t bring Junkrat from his room. He frowns, but lets it go. Plates the stir fry, leaves one on the counter - reckons Rat’ll emerge sooner or later.

Takes his own meal to the porch, hopes the breeze still kicking up dust devils will offer some measure of break from the heat. It doesn't. Instead, even as he eats a tension gathers between his brows, along his shoulders, tightening his stomach. Something in the air, an odd heaviness that tastes of electricity. A memory, locked firmly away, threatens to slip free. It chases him back inside and he digs through the cabinets until he finds an old bottle of gut rot whiskey, cracks the lid and takes a long swig, straight. Makes him cough, and the knot of trepidation loosens only slightly. He takes another drink and it burns his esophagus all the way down, pooling in his belly like lava. He keeps drinking anyway, standing in the doorway, eyes trained on the horizon. Watching. Until the last lingering glow of the sun has disappeared and the bottle is empty.

Then he finds himself in front of Junkrat’s closed door. Still no sounds from inside and he raises his fist to knock. But what will he say? What can he say? It’s hot? Feels like something’s coming? He’s afraid? Jesus, even thinking it feels fucking insane. Drops his fist, turns from the door and the odd silence.

Should probably go to bed. A headache hovers at the edges of his awareness threatening hangover, and to hopefully avoid it, he fills a glass of water, finishes it, fills it again. Rubs sweat from his forehead with the back of his wrist. If he goes to bed, though, he’ll have to turn his back to the horizon. Have to close his eyes. Let the wind whine down the chimney… Can't bear it. So he paces. From kitchen to bedroom and back. Only sounds the wind and his own footsteps.

Until the work room door creaks open as he passes it for the hundredth, thousandth, some number beyond counting time. Junkrat freezes in the doorway, Roadhog in the middle of the hallway. Their gazes snag, catch.

Rat’s clutching a blanket around his shoulders, even in the heat. He tries to grin, but the expression’s a brittle and cracking thing. “Heya Hoggie,” he says, voice full of gravel and he coughs.

“...”

“Sorry didn’t give ya a hand with the planting. Been feelin’ sorta…” Sentence trails off and Rat’s gaze goes hazy before a heavy sneeze hastily muffled into the blanket rocks him forward.

“Bless,” Roadhog says but Junkrat waves it away.

“Don’t bother. Still gonna - ” he manages before ducking into the blanket as another sneeze shudders through him.

Roadhog takes a breath, but Junkrat sneezes a third time, and a fourth. Roadhog pauses, raises a brow. “...”

“Yeah, think I’m finished.”

“Bless. Forget the planting, ain’t a worry.”

Junkrat rubs his eyes. “What’re ya doin’ still awake, though? Thought sure you’d be sleepin’.”

Roadhog shrugs. The wind moans in between a window and its jamb and he shivers before he can suppress it.

Understanding dawns across Rat’s face. “Ah, it’s like that, o’ course.” Clears his throat. “C’mon. You can sleep. I’ll keep watch.”

“But you’re sick,” Roadhog protests through a yawn wide enough to crack his jaws.

“An’ I been sleepin’ most of the day. Can manage for a while.”

Roadhog wants to argue, but finds himself following Junkrat to the bedroom, lying down at Rat’s urging. His eyelids are so heavy. “Rat…”

“Sleep,” Junkrat says.

Only once does Roadhog jerk awake, the scent of smoke lingering in his nostrils, the echo of her cries in his ears. He blinks, and in the deep black of night he barely makes out Junkrat’s silhouette outlined by faint moonlight, all sharp angles and scarecrow hair, perched in the window, still keeping watch.

“Ain’t nothing but a dream,” Junkrat rasps, just above a whisper.

“I heard…”

“The wind,” Rat says firmly.

They’re both silent for a while. Roadhog shifts, trying to get comfortable.

As though the confirmation that he’s still awake gives Junkrat the courage he says, “You can tell me about it, ya know.”

“...”

“Nightmares.” A long pause, then an admission, “I get ‘em too.”

“...” “One day,” Rat says. “You can tell me one day.”

Maybe he will. But for now, trusting that Junkrat will watch for spark or flame, Roadhog lets himself fall back into sleep.

#look i managed a shortfic #snezfic #oversnez #Roadie's haunted

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jeanlucgodardbby · 4 years

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i feel like i’ve been starved for summer

The summer before twists into my skin

grocery carts stacked miles high

heat, only unpleasant

can you see me through my sweat?

but this summer belongs to you.

to the aching i feel in the shower

to the one in my chest

the summer belongs to the pinging i’ve scarcely felt,

and to the brief cool nights

That stalk the days.

do you mind if I paraphrase?

peach pies carved with butter knives —

leaf ridden pools —

scratchy mix tapes.

this heat belongs to you and i

To the “tea house amid the cherry blossoms

on the way to death”

nothing quite bites like starvation

so i consume our summer like none before

Loving with intent

drawing the lines with sunshine

that sneaks through my blinds.

but you’ll have to realize i’m helpless

because you won’t trust and i’m scared of becoming someone else

it’s almost careless the way you’re hyper-aware

of the way that strand falls in your face

curling beneath your nose.

you can’t—you don’t escape my dreams

the ones with my arm around your abdomen and your hand

in my hair.

the way you

speak, move, and breathe

turn me to grape jelly against the wall.

i want you to run your fingers

through the holes in my old blue bra

webbed along my back

tell me you love the way it fits

my thoughts and mind

run your fingers between the holes

in my favorite bra.

i know your poetry

isn’t about me

but do you mind if i pretend it is,

every now and again?

the aching travels to my stomach

it resonates to my head

sending me into the clouds

how long until i can’t feel my toes?

“my skin is thick but my knees are weak”

Somebody get me a brace.

please let me come in

Its so hot and I miss your dog

i’m sorry for my sense of urgency

but i can’t help feelin’

if we don’t act now

we’ll lose what we’ve built

that it’ll slip between our fingers

all the time and suddenly we’re in a Mamma Mia film,

tumbling to be lost in our sea of what-ifs

do you have the time?

do i have the time?

do We have the time?

Mamma mia…..

i wonder how many times there was more

more beneath the question i didn’t ask.

How many times your bandaid covered an infection.

i like band-aids because they’re reminders that i’m alive

wrapped around my finger

across my leg

over my ankle.

was it you who instilled this idea in me?

the line sickens my mind

a sadness pervades

and reason fails.

i know what this was

i knew your Intent

before we began

but i still can’t help but think:

“no! she doesn’t want me like i want her”

maybe because it’s true

or maybe because your loving with intent scares me

and i start thinking there’s no loving even at all

it kinda drives me crazy

to think about all the love songs on the radio

the ones my mother turns off

the ones you hum along to

to think about the static on the other end

their questions and proclamations of love

unanswered in this one way channel

“shall i stay, would it be a sin?”

“won’t you take my hand?”

“do you know how much you mean to me?”

it makes me sad

but i suppose it’s fair

we don’t always get a response,

and we don’t always like the answer when it’s there.

though i can myself living without you

i also see myself

diving head first off a california diving board

into the lava pool we’ve created

i love you, i know

we’re growing old

20 years and under

i’ll jump into the lava

the moment we have to leave

because i don’t want it to end

six seasons and a summer

let me the lava eat away at me

I find myself, tormented yet naive

i wish to be with you til the skies fall in,

loving without furious abandon.

But I’ve found an understanding that frustrates and berates and I love the way you make sense

So I’ll always wait.

I love that that you love imperfection

I see it in the sway of your writing

your eyes are drawn to chapped lips

it scared me when i stutter around you

did you know my grandfather has always had a stutter?

and i’m always afraid it’ll present itself in me

my own hidden imperfection

that’ll you’ll love the idea

of my stuttered “f”s and “w”s

more than you love me

the wind blows and the heat hugs

wrapping its fingers around my legs

my blonde hair slapping my flushed cheeks

i’m smoking even though i know you hate it

it really does calm me down

and you’re not here—

I needed something.

it’s just so quiet up here

i think you’d like it.

people don’t give enough to summer heat

won’t you meet me at surf city highway?

fighting dehydration

the better i come to know you the more amazement i have for the infinity within you

It’s so hot here.

don’t say it was me

don’t crazy ex girlfriend me

don’t lie to me

dont dont dont

i know i didn’t to read into it

i know that you just couldn’t bare it

i know you’re scared of it

i know i know i know

but jesus christ man

dissemble your watch to me realign it

to dwell in me

to dwell on me

for only a moment of your time

call it a devotion to

intense and immense gratification

i feel it in my chest again

in my toes and knees and stomach

but it’s changed and morphed

so now all you’ve become

all we’ve become

you’ve belittled us to a note

lying in my iphone

with feelings unspoken

desires unsatisfied

Young love: a terrifying mystery

a yearning for you to come back

and a fear that you actually might

(draft #1)

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