#I cant wear a binder because of chronic pain either so I'll only be able to actually wear clothes once I get top surgery in uh 20 fkn years

[aftermathing]

man I'm so sad I WISH I could dress like a pirate and wear frilly shirts and jabots and knickers and stupid long socks and pearl necklaces but I literally haven't changed out of my autism hoodie and sweatpants since 2017 :((

#I cant wear a binder because of chronic pain either so I'll only be able to actually wear clothes once I get top surgery in uh 20 fkn years #I cancelled my hrt talk appointment b I got too scared :(( #I also don't know how to cut bangs so my hair is too long #I'll never be boy at this rate :(( #I'm always like man I don't even have dysphoria life is good. Umm no sir you're autistic and can't recognize your own emotions #Like I'm not dead so I must be fine that's the only other option #Some people cant even shower with their clothes off so Imm like Im good no pain here. No ur just autistic and cant recognize self in mirror #So everyone thinks I have no problems no mental illness no ptsd no dysphoria #Nope I just don't trust you enough to be honest to you so I will always tell you I'm good bc I know you must be worse #That's called masking I think