#I had way more fun than i thought i would answering them aksjdghsd

[ashton-ryder]

🔥🍑 📙

𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 ; 𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒃𝒐𝒘 𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔 … ( 𝒐𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆 ) (x)

🔥 — everything’s all aflame! a headcanon about a time in my muses life that felt incredibly chaotic or out of control around them.

tw: dissociation 

Ashton comes from a quieter part of Minnesota and never really lived in a huge city with him more attuned with being in nature. So to have been accepted into NYU for doctorate program and moving there had him facing the urban jungle and he didn’t expect it to feel that overwhelming. The day he arrived, every sudden loud burst of sounds had him on edge and flinching, especially just leaving the marines and the mishaps of his final mission. He remember trying to walk through the crowded streets to get groceries; people shoving, fast walkers glaring, cars honking, ambulances blaring, and Ashton remembered his mind shutting down as if to protect and disconnect him from the bombardment to his mind, dissociating and watching himself try to keep up with the notions of New York life, blurring the noises away, numbing himself from the overstimulation of life, one step forward, and then the next, just get to somewhere quieter, somewhere to think without the chaos. He didn’t know how long had passed. And before he knew it, he stopped dead in the middle of the street, an oncoming car blaring loudly at him and a kind stranger yanking him out of the streets and out of the self preserving state he was in that unknowing could’ve led to his death. It took him a long time to get accustomed to New York, starting with a constant use of headphones and music yet slowly but surely, the city life would grow on him.

🍑 — you’re a peach! a headcanon specifically about a physical aspect of a person they are attracted to.

Physical and sexual attraction was something less familiar to Ashton compared to emotional attraction, he had a hard time grasping for an understanding of it when his friends or bunkmates talk about it. He thought back then that maybe something was broken in him that he couldn't relate, but it rarely bothered him. He had other things to do in life. He had his whole life ahead of him to come back and figure it out again, maybe if he just waited a little more it'll hit him. It never did but Ashton never felt like he was losing out. But if he had to choose a physical aspect that he at least admired, it would be people's eyes, as the saying goes, the eyes are the windows to the soul, you can see one's joy, sadness, fear, unfiltered. What a beautiful aspect of humanity's silent communication.

📙 — in the orange book! for a book, poem or piece of literature that my muse really loves, and why.

The Voyager Record: A Transmission by Anthony Michael Morena

You are getting so far away now. Does your distance mean your irrelevance? How the further away you hurtle from Earth, the less you become about us. You will be about another people, not who we are. Faerie elves exist only to supply meaning to words like "flit" and "folk." This is you to us. A boogeyman encased with stellar dirt with a golden eye that, in ideal conditions, sings.

Ashton remembers finding this fascinating book when it first launched, encapsulating the beauty of The Voyager's Golden Record mission back in the 1970s. He has always been a man of science, of numbers, hard cold facts and calculations of space. He lost a bit of the spark of wonder over the years and his professor recommended to him to reconnect with the human and philosophical aspects of space. We look to space because we are human. We can't forget that.

The Voyagers carry a message from Earth, a phonograph record plated with gold containing 27 songs, 118 images, and greetings in 55 languages meant to summarize all life on our planet for the extraterrestrials who might one day encounter the crafts. This book is the record of that record: a history in fragments exploring how legendary astronomer Carl Sagan and his team attempted to press the entire human race into a single groove.

Often, the book focuses on what’s not on the record. No photo of a naked man and a naked woman. No hip hop. No gay couples. No Grandmaster Flash. Many of the book’s pages contain only one paragraph, or a single word, with each snippet floating in a white space that invites further rumination. Zooming the lens way, way out, the book asks us to consider humanity’s need to nail down our context in the universe.

In effect, it elegantly and soulfully reaches to grasp the vastness of space, human experience, and manifestations of our attempts to matter.

It was a profound book that is still a favorite of Ashton's, and still sits on his book shelf. He takes it out to read every once in a while, every time he feels like he's slipping too far away from humanity.

#tw: dissociation #only the first answer for tw! #TYSM FOR THE ASKS #and ty to anyone willing to read this longass gibberish #I had way more fun than i thought i would answering them aksjdghsd #the voyager record a transmission is actually a really good read highly recommend #sometimes a lil depressing but thats life #;answered #;muse #;more about #;memes #bnymeme