#I need to walk the desert for miles repenting on my knees. for ive done things that need repenting

[imthatwannabeauthor]

I need to walk into the ocean with small open wounds. I need it bad.

#I need the salt to petrify me right #I need the ocean to putrefy me #I need to be purified in the way my baptism never quite took #I remember when my baptism happened. 8 years old. common age for it as a mormon kid #I had just lost another tooth that morning. and i didn;t know where to keep it. so i held it in my mouth until my mom found out #I had cuts on my legs. i dont remember what from now #but i remember the water didnt feel right on it #it didnt hurt. it just felt wrong #I need to do it again #I need to do it right. #I need to walk the desert for miles repenting on my knees. for ive done things that need repenting #i hope it stings #I hope it infects #I hope i have to spend weeks carefuly healing those salt wounds. #good thing im so far inland. #I think the ocean to me is like that poem about the meanings of the word hold #the hold/hell/hollow poem