#SHE IS SO VERY PRECIOUS TO MEEEEE i love her 😭

[ncytiri]

say hello to my brand new oc for starfield, hayden!!!! she was inspired by one of my fave characters from for all mankind, tracy stevens 💞 so of course i had to use tracy's actress, the gorgeous sarah jones, as her faceclaim and honor tracy by using her last name (via her husband, another fave of mine, gordo!) <3 and her first name is inspired by, of course, my man hayden christensen but also hayden anhedönia, the artist behind ethel cain who i have fallen in love with, her music is just so good...

hayden has the kid stuff trait meaning she sends 2% of her credits home to her parents every (in game) week and this might be one of my most favorite traits in a bethesda game ever, the parents are SO funny (played by none other than nana visitor and tim russ <3) and they are so sweet too!! so hayden was definitely an only child who was completely doted on by her parents and spoiled completely so once she got her nice cushy job as a professor of geology, she began financially supporting her parents regardless of what they said :')

i like to think she goes through a bit of a transformation out of her professor persona at the beginning of the game (more put together and "presentable" like that main pic i used for her graphic) and then as she goes through the game, she starts to change and maybe gets a haircut, changes her makeup up etc. so if i do end up changing her, i'll show her updated look!!!

also if you couldn't tell i am not the best at matching faces to an actor so pls forgive any glaring differences between hayden and sarah <3 SKFDDS i just couldn't find a good color or hair style for her (this one does match the tracy look above a bit tho!)

anywhoooo yes, that's enough rambling from me about her, i just thought i would give a little bit of background info on her and talk about her inspiration, but feel free to ask me anything about her if you wanna know more!!!! i'm still rounding out her character but i would love to talk about her some more :'D

#oc: hayden #oc rambling #SHE IS SO VERY PRECIOUS TO MEEEEE i love her 😭 #also if you couldnt tell she loves doing her makeup and adorning herself in nice jewelry <3

[hak]

OKAYYY. I’ve been playing final fantasy x and here are some preliminary thoughts after like a hard won 4ish hours in 🫠

It was a huge leap to start this game just because 1) I don’t play games like this period (rpg fighters) and have even less experience than any other type of game I ever played and 2) there’s truly nothing more intimidating to me than the final fantasy franchise.. like it only won out over me trying out kingdom hearts because I didn’t feel like doing the punch _ button for _ move type fighting in a game just yet lol. BUT WHATEVER! It has been my goal this year anyway to try games out of my comfort zone (80% of games out there lol) so here I am…

I think the world-building is very appealing!! look I have never in my life even tried looking up final fantasy lore or anything I think I just know Sephiroth and the big ducks maybe but regardless I loved the 5 seconds we got in Zanarkand just because a fantasy steampunk-esque world can be charming.. and exploring the 1000yrs later world and it’s differences is also very interesting. I think I spent half of my hours just talking to everybody I saw and looking at the world textures lol it’s nice and peaceful most of the time

I love the cast a lot.. playing as Tidus kind of surprised me because I think I’m not used to fully formed playable main characters like him (was thinking Link or a fire emblem protag rip) but I LOVE HIM!!!! HES SO GOOFY AND CHARMING and I am so endeared by the voiceover narration (ummm his future self??) and where the story is taking him. He and Yuna are so sweet and cute. I actually really love that not ever cutscene was there to move the plot??? Like the one first boat scene where Tidus stole some guys binoculars and was monkeying around on the ship. Or this one 🥺😭💗

SO PRECIOUS!!! It’s how I know something horrible is going to come regarding them 🧎Well for now I’m just in for the ride. The other guardians are definitely a ragtag bunch but I really appreciated how they were fleshed out in this narrative. I like the big wolf beast guy and I will tell you every time I get a chance I try to get Tidus to go talk to him and every time I get ignored 🥲 ONE DAY!!!! And I love theeee goth woman supreme Lulu even her name is so cute. Love her little doll. She saves my ass every single fight I swear. Wakka is also charming in his own way lol he reminds me of a character I just don’t know who.. he and Lulu having their josei romance drama in the backdrop of this story also gets meeeee. Like!?? Look at them wtf…

Ok ok now about the fighting itself: it’s not as bad as I thought. It’s still not something I really have come to look forward to though, and I really really despise the mechanic where you’re walking and get a randomized battle out of nowhere. The Pokémon grass effect whatever you call it…. IM SICK OF IT!!!! LET ME RUN AWAY!!! especially when I’ve had like 3 fights in a row and that stupid breaking glass effect comes and I have to fight again. Oh save me. im not built for this. HOWEVER. Besides that. It’s okay. Figuring out what moves I should be doing isn’t all that difficult even if I do kind of just guess most of the time. I’m lucky I’m using an emulator and saving as much as I can in case I need to reload during a battle. I’ll be okay lol I just want to complain sometimes just cuz. 😖

And finally…. The one thing I did not expect to encounter in this game and genuinely made me want to QUIT this game for good despite everything positive above: BLITZBALL. WHY DO YOU EXIST. WHY. I CANT STAND THIS SHIT!!!!!!!!

This funny scene made me laugh when I first saw it because I literally thought blitzball games would play out like that first cutscene in Zanarkend - AS A CUTSCENE!!! TIDUS YOULL LOSE I HAVE NO SKILL YOULL LOSE TIDUS!!!!!!!

I will admit now I didn’t know wtf I was doing on that boat and totally failed at getting the Jecht shot but how??? Was I supposed to know????? I THOUGHT IT WOULD JUST LEAD TO A FUN MINIGAME how was I to know it was life or death (in blitzball)…. I did Google whether I needed it to win and results varied. But before I get judged I spent about 40 min trying to grasp the entire blitzball tutorial and things still didn’t wrap around until I began playing and EVEN THEN I wanted to cry and rage quit. Something I have never needed to do in all my life!!!!!! Then I thought fine whatever I’ll just let the game do it’s thing and maybe try to give the ball to Tidus as much as possible if that’s my only shot and lord almighty I couldn’t even get one point in. The ai would score so much and I swear I paid attention. Imagine me mid game pausing just to google 10+ year old forum answers on whether I can just do the bare minimum and still win. I don’t even think I needed to win??? But the other team was so mean to us …. LIKE I WANTED TO WIN….. but I’m not capable of it. I knew it when I first started the tutorial too versus the real game I truly am so disinterested in this kind of minigame (the least mini of mini games I’ve ever played ever) that I don’t care. Like I’m just so so frustrated that it’s 3am im writing this post just to vent about how I want to keep playing ffx but not at the cost of this stupid side game that shouldn’t even take me more than 15 min to play!!!!!

I should’ve known from this part in the tutorial that this was bullshit fr. Look I know its not like all of the mechanics were rocket science, if I took 1 day to actually study the game I would BUT WHY WOULD I DO THAT. WHY WOULD I WASTE MY TIME AND DO THAT. I am just so put off at this point from this game simply because of blitzball. Sorry to Tidus and his quest for home and all but it will not come true because I cannot stand playing blitzball. 🤬

Where i am now: I paused at the end kinda when Wakka comes in at the end of the game. I couldn’t score a single point so it was just left at 2-0. I really don’t care anymore I will just lose the game because I’m sick of it. But damn I was really trying okay. Kinda. I hate being petty but we’ll see if I want to even pick it up as a whole game again when I wake tmrw after this experience lol

To be extremely honest I kinda began ffx as a total “wouldn’t it be funny if?” type game for me because I know what I like and dislike in games and this one bordered that for me so I was genuinely curious to see how far I’d last. But this blitzball game is so far into my dislikes that it actually bums me out because the storytelling is so in my lane. I don’t want to quit just yet but I will say now if blitzball gets any worse I’m out. That truly is my last straw lmao. Also it seems like a very long game otherwise and even that is a struggle for me to comprehend. Plus battles are even going to get worse and I can barely slide by during those… idk it is looking grim for the mariel partakes in final fantasy era 😭

#g*