#Sorry Kristen youre now Chrystaaiyn

[the-real-list-of-ominous-threats]

I'll change the spelling of your name to something elaborately absurd and stupid

#oh your name is Caitlin? congrats now youre Khaightlynne #You're named Michael? ok Maiykhaieyl #Sorry Kristen youre now Chrystaaiyn #Think youre safe becuse youre named John? ive got bad news for you Jawnne #Mary isnt safe either so take that Maiyeriye #if any of these alternate spellings somehow manage to resemble actual names in any language its very unintention; alas i only speak english #to the person who asked what emily would become its Ehmiyilieey #my own name is caroline so if i applied this threat to myself I'd end up Kairohlaiyene #...good thing i have no reason to thretat myself