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#aaaaaa the two towers is my fav i love it so much i can't stand it ;A;
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TWO TOWERS THOUGHTS!!!!
there are more of these bc the two towers is probably my favourite of the trilogy, despite the distinct LACK of boromir πŸ˜”
BUT i did notice a few things that baby birb totally ignored or forgot about!!! find out what they are........below 😈
one of baby birb's fav shots of aragorn was when he's lying across a rock tracking merry and pippin bc it reminded me of that one episode spongebob squarepants where the lads end up riding a rock to the customer's house 🀣 'it's not a boulder, it's a rock! a big, beautiful ROCK!!' lmao
baby birb ALSO loved all the shots of everyone running. as a smol individual, i had to run EVERYWHERE to keep up with the Tall Folk πŸ˜’ sure it was nice seeing THOSE feckers sprinting for a change!!
am still very confused about why anyone listened to grima what's his name, ur man's half the way to gollum u know πŸ‘€
tangential to the running scenes: i love aragorn's doofy run where he's flinging his one arm about like a silly. reminds me of my OWN unhinged run 🀣 (it is possible that these films are more deeply imprinted upon me than i thought πŸ˜…)
'LOOKS LIKE MEAT'S BACK ON THE MENU, BOYS!!!'
legolas's FACE every time he has an emotion. delightful
knowing that viggo mortensen broke his toe made me laugh at the helmet kicking scene tbh, i know it's meant to be poignant but that EXTREMELY REALISTIC scream of pain got me going like 🀣
shout out to treebeard holding merry and pippin in his tree hands. i kept thinking 'what if he just. smashes them together like barbie dolls 🀣'
ORCSES. HOBBITSES. i actually love gollum-smeagol, he's too pathetic for me to hate. HE'S LITERALLY SAT THERE SINGING HIS LIL SONG AND EATING A RAW FISH. LEAVE HIM GO HE'S NOT BOTHERING ANYONE ;A;
that gifset ruined everything for me. 'this forest is old......very old....' old as balls. that's just the line now. i no longer acknowledge the original. πŸ˜”
cheeky gandalf!! 'u wouldn't part an old man from his walking stick!! πŸ₯ΊπŸ˜³πŸ˜˜πŸ€­πŸ™„' (<- this is how birb thought using emojis worked a scant five years ago. be GRATEFUL i was not on tumblr back then, for the carnage would have been GREAT AND TERRIBLE!!!)
i love love LOVE the scene of the trio beating the shite out of the bg guys while gandalf walked slowly toward the king. u just see legolas punching a dude in the face, aragorn ZOOMING round in front of gandalf and off to the side, it's hilarious 🀣
whEN THEY TOSS GRIMA DOWN THE STAIRS LIKE JGY πŸ‘€
so many ICONIC lines!!! 'boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew!!'
'it's the beards πŸ‘€'
U DROP ARAGORN OFF A CLIFF???? OH! OH! JAIL FOR ORCS!! JAIL FOR ORCS FOR 1000 YEARS!!!!
rip eowyn, she's so lonely and sad that the slightest validation from a hot guy she's known for five minutes was enough to make her fall stupid in love with him πŸ˜”
(i am also stupid in love with him, but it's different when i do it bc. um. uhhhh. πŸ‘€πŸ˜³)
god he IS great tho, isn't he??? he's so dirty and greasy and wet and soggy, i love him and his dirty face and his dirty clothes and his dirty hands i love him i love him i lo
legolas got SO ANGRY about the orc telling them aragorn went over the cliff, he took it SO PERSONALLY. this makes birb want them to kiss each other 😊
they can kiss gimli as well, i don't mind!!
also the king awkwardly patting legolas on the shoulder like he's a slightly homophobic dad trying to comfort his gay son after a break-up, 'i still care about u but im super uncomfortable so im just not gonna say anything ok?? ok. manly head nod. im out 😐'
OPEN MOUTH KISSING??? BEFORE MARRIAGE????!!!!!!! OBSCENE!!!!!! LEAVE ROOM FOR THE HOLY GHOST!!!
side note: poor elrond, here he is trying to make sure his daughter has a good life and all she wants is to marry the dirty ranger like
'u think u know a girl, u raise her for 2000 or whatever years, organise her birthday parties and buy her a pony and teach her how to control the river, and then in the end she leaves u behind and marries a guy with a fraction of her lifespan, dooming herself to future suffering and despair smh πŸ˜”'
also arwen's face when aragorn is breaking up with her,,,,,'what did daddy say to u?? this is bc of what he said, isn't it?! i can't believe he's still interfering with my love life!!!!' ;A;
that lil ~half caress~ aragorn does to legolas's hand when he's returning arwen's necklace to him????? it's like??? idk super romantic??? it made my stomach go SWOOP?? if i stare at a gif of this scene i feel a bit dizzy??? is that weird. am i. weird πŸ‘€
i want them to make out with each other, sorry lads πŸ˜”
the annoying thing in all these medieval fantasy type stories, when there's not enough men for the war, they're always conscripting 10 year old boys, while the teenage girls and young women without any kids are hiding with the elders and children. LIKE. HOW can u justify sending little 8 yo haleth son of hama to the front lines?? LOOK AT HIM!! HE'S TINY!!! surely a 15 - 21 year old young woman would have a better chance of NOT DYING than a wee lad!!! they're peasants, they're used to hard labour!! do directors/writers etc think it's more ~realistic~ or sth?? do ppl think NO WOMAN ever took up a sword in a crisis??? even if certain things are Not Done (and in some places, even under penalty of DEATH), the Rules tend to fly out the feckin window once there's an emergency!!! I THINK 10,000 ORCS MARCHING ON HELM'S DEEP COUNTS FOR AN EMERGENCY???????
all im saying. is if we're all going to die anyway, then EVERYONE should get a sword. even the kids. ESPECIALLY the kids. it went really well in the walking dead when the lil girls each had a pistol. i promise i can be trusted with weapons i p romi s
the best thing in medieval-style warfare is when the two armies stand across from each other and shout insults back and forth for a bit, like 'you're ugly!' or 'you're smelly!' or 'i slept with your sister, and it weren't anything to write home about!!'
please could somebody fetch gimli a ladder, ur mans can't see above the fecking wall like nnO NO NOT THAT KIND OF LADDER
legolas and gimli counting their kills will never NOT be funny to me
MY KING A BEAST!! LOOK AT HIM GO!!! HE RODE A FUCKING LADDER AND CRASHED INTO A BUNCH OF ORCS LIKE A KILLER WHALE GOING AFTER SEALS!!! ;A;
god when he shoves open those doors and ARRIVEs it's so so so fucking hot. god he is sso hot. he's so hot i love him i love him i
lol they sneak out the side door like 'hee hee hoo hoo, no one shall see us~' 🀣
'TOSS ME!!!!!' *yeets the dwarf*
legolas SHIELD SURFING!!! HANG TEN, BRO!!! GNARLY WIPE OUT!!! πŸ€™
im sorry
imagine being such an asshole that u make the fucking TREES angry??? like, u make the trees hate u SO FUCKING MUCH. that they literally come MARCHING OUT OF THE FOREST to commit mass property damage???? πŸ‘€
when i watched the scene i shouted 'TILL BIRNAM WOOD DO COME TO HIGH DUNSINANE!!!!' out loud but nobody laughed ._.
come onnnn it's funny right??? esp since we know that 'no man of woman born' can kill the guy in the next film!!! iT'S FUNNY, RIGHT??? ;A;
sam and frodo tumbling down the stairs also made me laugh but i paid for it immediately after when sam goes 'it's your sam. don't you know your sam?' fucknig KILL MEEEEE PLS
the most iconic, most beautiful, most painful line of the film-----the one that always makes me cry, the one i couldn't forget if i wanted to, the words that stand between me and DEATH------
'That there's some good in this world, Mr Frodo. And it's worth fighting for.'
GOD. IM FUCKING DEAD 😭😭😭😭 beautiful delivery as well, shout out to samwise gamgee for being the best man to walk middle earth, i will now lie in a puddle of my own tears _(:3γ€βˆ )
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