#and i'm just like. ugh. bleh. sorry i have actually been there and experienced that. no thanks.

[hirazuki]

I've always sympathized with Melkor, even as a kid, but re-reading the Ainulindale in its entirety for the first time since coming to a certain understanding of things as a child of narcissistic parents really makes it hit different.

I really just want to offer him some reading material, a highlighter, a pencil, and more sticky tabs than one should rightly possess.

#i know it's not meant to be read this way #i'm fully aware this is a very personal and individual interpretation BUT i can't help myself #this is just what i see when i read this and no amount of 'but he's evil' is ever going to change it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #i see er/u being both dismissive of and reactive towards melkor's efforts/tantrums in turn and #instead of approaching him the way he would say au/le and having a conversation first #he degrades the things melkor has made in order to raise ul/mo up; shames him #and instead of addressing the issue himself makes melkor's younger sibling his 'instrument' against melkor #and i'm just like. ugh. bleh. sorry i have actually been there and experienced that. no thanks. #i always get upset with abusive parental figures but there is a very specific subset of abuse via neglect and emotional immaturity #projection and shirking responsibility and transferring blame that just gets me Very Upsetti (: #for extremely personal reasons #and melkor being evil in no way makes this behavior okay to me; especially since er/u made him like that in the first place (: (: #and then he just like. fucking washes his hands of the whole thing. it's arda's problem now bye bye. #don't mind me #just some late night incoherent rambling before i go pass out XD