#anyway if you're not sure just start with 5 mg and then work up in 5 mg increments if you spend an evening without that dose affecting you

[random-thot-generator]

Dirty Little Secret + Pt. 5

JOHNNY 'SOAP' MACTAVISH x FEM READER

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Summary: A trip to Brighton ends up with you stranded on the side of the road. But have no fear, Johnny's here!

Warnings/Tags: Profanity, bit of Fluff to keep you warm, Johnny saves the day, Reader's beginning to come around, No use of Y/N

(Notes: You know me. I can't stay away from the feels and warm fuzzies. This is just two old lovers finally getting to know one another.)

Word Count: 1.9K

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"Love, I need ya to go to Brighton for me t'morrow," Aunt Rue announced over dinner. "Eddie texted me earlier and said he found an original gear shift knob for the MG, but he won't be able to get away for at least another week. He offered to send it through the post, but I don't trust 'em not to lose it."

"What about the bakery?" you asked. You were scheduled to work in the morning.

"I already called Lou. She'll cover for ya."

You shrugged. "Sure, okay."

She smiled at you, patting your hand. "Yer a doll. Thanks, love."

The next morning, you rolled your scooter out of the work shed, doing a quick check before throwing your leg over the seat. It was a vintage, mint-green 1962 Vespa you received for your sixteenth birthday from your aunt, probably your most prized possession.

Donning your helmet, you started her up and set off for Brighton, a giddy grin on your face. The feeling you were experiencing was akin to playing hooky from school. It was a beautiful day for a ride, and it had been ages since you'd taken your scooter further than Kilroy, so you planned to make the most of it.

You made it to Eddie's custom shop in good time despite the traffic, retrieved the part, then took a brief lunch break at the Brighton Pier before heading back home. You were in no hurry to get back, enjoying the seaside scenery as you reveled in the pure exhilaration of traveling the open road. At least, you were enjoying it until a lorry almost turned you into a greasy smear on the asphalt.

You just barely managed to keep the Vespa upright, slewing off the road, the motor rattling to an abrupt halt as you flung a leg out to keep yourself from getting thrown arse over tea kettle. Heart pounding, you glared after the speeding truck through a cloud of dust, a string of curses flying out of your mouth as you stripped the helmet from your head.

"Ya mad bastard!" you shouted at the lorry, shoving the kickstand down with your foot. Climbing off the scooter, you staggered a bit as your shaking legs struggled to support you. "Bloody hell!" you gasped, grabbing onto the seat to keep your balance.

Adrenaline coursed through your veins, making you feel nauseous enough to bend at the waist and plant your shaking hands on your trembling knees. As you fought to keep down your fish and chips from lunch, you pulled in long, steady breaths to help slow your racing heart.

Once you felt calm enough to stand upright again, you blew out a long exhale, then turned to check over your scooter. "Fuck," you muttered, spotting the rear flat tire immediately.

You were still about twenty miles outside of Kilroy, and there was no way you'd be able to push the Vespa that far. You'd have to call for help. Taking out your phone with another muttered curse, you called Aunt Rue.

"Heavens, love!" she exclaimed, when you told her what had happened. "Thank goodness you're alright. Just sit tight. I'll send someone t'come get ya right away."

"Thanks, Aunt Rue." You put your phone away and slumped down beside the Vespa to wait.

Within five minutes, you received a text from Rue saying someone was on their way, though she didn't say who to expect. Not that it mattered to you. So long as they had a way to transport your scooter, that's all you cared about.

That's what you thought, anyway, until a familiar black truck pulled off the road, coming to a stop in front of you. Sighing out a resigned breath, you climbed to your feet and stepped forward to greet him.

"Bonnie!" Johnny called as soon as he got out of his truck, rushing up to you to take you by the shoulders. "Are ye a'right, sweetheart?" he asked, looking you over with an anxious expression.

"I'm fine," you assured him. "Just a bit shaken up."

His hands kneaded at your shoulders, worry etched into his face. "Christ, I damn near keeled over when yer aunt tol' me wha' happened." His hands tightened on your shoulders before he pulled you into his chest, arms wrapping around you in a vice-like hug. "Thank Christ yer a'right," he breathed out, resting his cheek against your head.

Your arms came up on instinct to encircle his waist, letting him hold you for a moment. You couldn't deny that being in Johnny's arms was a huge comfort, and after the frightening close call you'd just had, you allowed yourself to briefly indulge in his strength and reassurance.

The two of remained that way for several more moments, before you gathered the strength to pull away, feeling slightly embarrassed by your own behavior. Avoiding eye contact, you planted your hands on your hips and turned to look at your scooter instead. "Do, um... Do you have any straps to tie her down with?" you asked, sounding as sheepish as you felt.

Johnny nodded slowly, taking note of the change in your demeanor. "Aye. We'll get her loaded up and get ya home. C'mon, hen."

The two of you wrestled your scooter into the back of his truck, Johnny getting her strapped down, double-checking the straps to make sure she was secure. "She should be good t'go," he said, hopping out of the truck bed.

Once you were back on the road, you blew out a tired breath and slouched into the passenger seat, closing your eyes. The two of you rode in silence, the sound of the wind whipping through the cab of the truck and the warmth of the sun hitting your face soothing your frayed nerves.

"Tha's a nice scooter ye got," Johnny said, casting a glance your way. "How long ya been ridin'?"

A little smile graced your lips as you slit open your eyes. "Aunt Rue got her for me when I was sixteen. She was my first real taste of freedom."

"Aye, ken what ye mean. Me da got me an' me brother dirt bikes. Tore up the countryside on those bikes. Used 'em to herd the sheep, too," he said with a laugh.

"Sheep?" you repeated, giggling. "You were a sheep herder?" An image of Johnny holding a shepherd's crook popped into your head.

He chuckled self-consciously, nodding. "Aye. Grew up on a sheep farm. Still canna smell sheep shite without thinkin' o' home."

You snorted out a soft laugh, your curiosity getting the better of you. "So, how many siblings do you have?"

"There's five o' us, countin' meself; me three sisters an' me brother, James. Brianne's the auldest, then Emmie, me, James and Sorcha."

"Ooh, you're the middle child. God, your poor mum. Bet you drove her bonkers."

He huffed a laugh and nodded. "Aye. 'Twas always gettin' up t'some sort o' mischief with James when we were lads. Least, until one o' me sisters tol' on us. Brianne was the worst, way meaner than our mam, always scoldin' us an' boxin' our ears. She's married an' got her own brood t'deal with now. Guess me an' the others were good practice fer her."

You sniffed in amusement, easily imagining him as a cute, blue-eyed boy with messy, dark hair and a devilish grin, no doubt an absolute terror. "Must've been nice, having a big family. I always wanted a sister, but..." You shrugged, leaving the thought to hang in the air.

He slanted a glance your way before focusing back on the road again. "Yer aunt, she mentioned that she raised ya," he said, keeping his voice soft and low.

A slight crease formed between your brows. "Yeah. My da dumped me on her doorstep when I was eight. Said he'd be back to get me, but never showed. I think after mum took off, he just couldn't cope with a kid on his own. So, Aunt Rue took me in. Can't complain, though. She gave me a better life than I ever had with them. Don't think either of them really wanted kids."

Johnny was quiet for a moment, brows tipped together. "Ya ever thought 'bout havin' wee'uns o' yer own?"

You tilted your chin up in thought. "Didn't used to think so. Had this whole glamorous life planned out for myself; ya know— successful career woman living it up in London. After being on my own in Hereford, though..." You sighed, shook your head. "I thought I'd love living in the city, but honestly I was miserable there. I'm not a city girl; I learned that much about myself. It gave me a whole new appreciation for Kilroy, once I moved back. Guess I'll always just be a simple village lass, but I'm okay with it, now. Feel more like myself than I have in years."

He hummed, nodding. "Aye, I ken wha' ya mean. No' much fer the city, either. 'S like livin' in a bloody rat maze, everyone packed t'gether." He gave a shake of his head. 'S no' fer me. Dinnae like livin' in Hereford. 'S jus' a convenience, close t'the base."

You entered Kilroy soon after and directed him to your aunt's cottage on the outskirts of the village. You could see his eyes taking in the cottage and land as you helped him unload the Vespa. "This is a nice place, bonnie," he commented, eyes still scanning the property.

"Yeah. Aunt Rue loves it here; me, too. Belonged to my grandparents. Needs a lot of work, though, especially the cottage."

Johnny studied the stone structure, noting the missing and broken shingles on the roof, the dry rot around the eaves and windows. "Aye. Could use a bit o' TLC."

You sniffed. "It could use a lot of TLC, but the money to pay for it is the problem." You shrugged. "We'll get it done, eventually."

Johhny gave you a sidelong look. "So, ya plan on stayin', then? Permanently, here in Kilroy, I mean."

You thought about it and then nodded. "Yeah. I think I am. It's home, ya know?"

His bobbed his head slowly, considering your words, then he heaved out a breath and offered you a smile. "D"ya need a ride into the village?"

You shook your head. "Nah. Lou's covering my shift at the bakery today. Think I'll stay here, give the Vespa a going over, get that flat tire off." You shifted awkwardly on your feet. "I, uh... Thanks for the lift back and helping with my scooter. I can give you a few quid for petrol or—"

He waved off your offer with a scoff. "'Twere nothin', bonnie. Was glad t'do it. " He seemed a bit awkward himself before finally stepping forward to give you a quick hug and peck on the cheek. "'M glad yer a'right, bonnie."

With that, he stepped back a few steps, his cheeky smile appearing before giving you a wink. "I'll see ya later, sweetheart," he said, then climbed back into his truck, cranked the motor and steered it back onto the road. He thrust his big arm out the window to give you a final wave before disappearing down the narrow lane.

Your hand drifted up to your face, fingers brushing over the spot where he'd kissed you, a little smile pulling up the corners of your mouth. You found yourself looking forward to seeing him again.

"See ya later, Johnny."

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part 4 part 6

#john soap mactavish x reader #soap x reader #cod soap x reader #john soap mactavish x fem reader #soap x fem reader #cod soap x fem reader #john soap mactavish #cod soap

[purplesurveys]

1808

How you doin’ on this fine Friday morning? It's a Saturday morning now, but I am doing okay. It's a long weekend because of the Chinese new year so I'm giddy that I got one extra off day yesterday; and while I know this calm feeling will immediately evaporate by Monday, I'd rather be in the now.

If you could pursue any hobby, career, dream right now, which would it be? I'd love to start vlogging as kind of like just a creative outlet. You just point a camera towards where you're headed, no one even has to watch it, and you get to archive your life. But it's also an expensive hobby and at this point in my life I just can't drop everything and get the equipment for it - a good camera, a mic, a new laptop for editing, lighting etc.

What do you look for most in a friendship? A low-maintenance personality. Someone who won't flip out or leave me in the dust when I can't reply for a few days at a time, or like someone who's okay with seeing each other just 5 days a year.

What’s the wildest hairstyle you’ve ever had? Probably going a vibrant purple! It's also still my favorite style I've ever had.

What would be the wildest hairstyle you’d go for? ^ Still that. I'm long overdue for a new dyeing job, and when I do I still plan on going back to purple.

Do you ever feel like breaking boundaries in any way? This is such a broad question but no, I guess not. I know I hate it when others overstep my boundaries, so I try not to do that.

Or are you more rigid, set in specific ways? You can say that.

Do you value tradition or are you one to not give a damn? It's not black and white. I definitely respect tradition to an extent, but I recognize when something is super outdated and that it would be better to go the modern route.

When buying clothes, do you care which department you shop at? Sure. There are brands I don't like.

Do you ever spot memes from shows and movies? Occasionally, yeah. I remember the excitement I got when I was watching Citizen Kane and saw the clapping meme haha. It was at a film class in college and I know I wasn't alone because I heard a bunch of people snickering too.

What was the last thing you baked? I haven't baked since I was like 13 lol. I still remember what I made – a batch of chocolate chip cookies that tasted like nothing.

If the Internet never existed, what do you think you’d be doing now? Watching TV, most likely.

What’s something you’ve been putting off today? I have a minor work task I should be doing but hoooooly shittttttt do I not give a fuuuuuuuucccccckkkkkk. Maybe after finishing this, just so it's out of my hair and I wouldn't have to think about it anymore.

Do you know how to thworp? I don't know what that is.

Have you tried something new at a restaurant lately? I had Mary Grace for the first time ever last Monday; Leah and I got a mushroom and garlic pizza. It was okay but not life-changing, which was fine because MG never claimed to be the home of pizza anyway lol. I also hate garlic so I was relieved that the garlic came off super weakly.

What’s the most boring flavor you can think of? Underseasoned chicken.

Have you been having any crazy weather lately in your corner of the world? Not really, it's been the usual.

Which place have you been to that’s the farthest from home? Malaysia.

If you could, would you rather go back in time or forward? Why? Forward. I'd like to see what technologies would emerge.

Do you think in words or images? Words.

If your skin could be any color of your choice, which would it be? I'm okay with mine.

Is there something you’d like to be doing instead? I wish I was in UP reading a book under a tree and unbothered by the world right now but 1) I'm too lazy to drive at the moment and 2) it's gonna get super hot in an hour or so anyway so I might as well just do this in the late afternoon.

If so, why aren’t you doing that now? Whoops I got into that already hahaha

[barelynakedthoughts]

I'm 21 weeks pregnant now. We just found out the sex of the baby...and I'm disappointed again. I really want a girl. I was so convinced we were having a girl this time around and then it ends up we're having another boy. I am sad...just like last time. I'm scared of going through infertility again. I'm worried I can't get pregnant again so I will never have a girl. I was so excited for a girl that I even bought leggings for the winter for her. I was ready for the good news and the technician just says, "well now you're out numbered." Sure, what do you say in a situation like this, but really...I already have a boy. I am already outnumbered. Math is math.

She also said that I should get a girl cat to help the count. I already have a girl cat and I would prefer all boy cats because the temper is so much more manageable. All-in-all, she was not the person I needed in that moment.

On the way home, I cried. I drove and wiped away the tears. I didn't want to go home and take care of my child. I didn't want to see anyone or do anything. I wanted to cry in a dark room by myself. Scary things ran across my mind about how I'm never going to be able to love this child. Part of me didn't care if they died. Whatever part of me is okay with that can be excommunicated for the rest of my life. I want this child, I know I do. I'm happy we're pregnant. I'm just sad we didn't have our little Marnie for the second time. We have to play the name again for a sex we very rarely agree on names for.

What if it takes years to get pregnant after this one...what if we're not as lucky as we were for this second child? What if I can't have Marnie...what if she never comes? I was going to be mostly content with two if we had a girl. Sure I want a big family, but I know having children is not up to me. I've learned through infertility that nothing is guaranteed.

I'm thankful...I know I am. My sadness in not having a girl is not caused by my sons nor is it related to them in anyway. It is not their fault whatsoever. I have to deal with my emotions and my disappointment...I have work through this on my own. I cannot and will not take it out on them. They did nothing wrong and they deserve all of my love and care.

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In other stories, my son is fighting sleep time and I don't understand why. He is tired but not over tired. He just keeps getting upset and crying before passing out for hours at a time. It's like he doesn't want to go to bed and he's letting me know. I just don't know how to fix this because if it were up to him, he'd go to bed at 6 and that's just way too early. We'd be waking up at 5 and that's insane. I just wish I didnt get frustrated with him being frustrated. He kicks his feet and bounces on my stomach. I'm worried it s hurting the baby and so I get stern and say, "Stop." He doesn't get scared, but he does get the memo. I know he loves me still, but I wish there was a better way than getting stern.

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Symptoms are still so mild. The baby moves a lot, which started towards the end of week 18. I was having terrible headaches, but those are mostly resolved. I take magnesium every day with my prenatal and 10 mg of aspirin. All so I don't have gestational hypertension again. I still would like a natural birth, but if push comes to shove, I'm not going to complain about a c-section so as long as the baby is born healthy and safe. I just want all of us to be healthy, safe and alive after all is said and done. I pray earnestly for it.

I feel like I've gained weight a lot faster this time around, but I'm also not feeling as big as I did before. I'm not watching as closely and I'm starting to maintain, which is interesting. The third trimester all leads to a lot more weight so we'll see how that goes.

I'm worried about weight loss and uterine retraction after the baby is born. Last time was shockingly easy and fruitful. I lost 55 pounds...but I'm just not sure my lazy self prepped my body in less than a year for things to go as smoothly. I hope for what is best and I'm trying to prepare myself for not getting the best. I just want the regular periods and ovulation again. I want the ease of getting pregnant again...I don't want another bout of infertility.