#but I'm definitely not being brutally honest about the historiography here

[theduchessofnaxos]

This paper is actually going quite well.

Too bad it's complete bullshit.

#I'm not lying #but I'm definitely not being brutally honest about the historiography here #look the first few works are technically all social histories but there's a qualitative difference from the later ones #and the politics is still important enough that I should get to call them political histories #Also frankly I don't care #I just need to finish the damn paper by midnight and then I will be free of this fucking course #I have never in my LIFE dreaded going to class before this course #And honestly? It's soul crushing! I have no will to succeed here! #My only motivation is that I liked the rest of the semester and I need to pass this class to continue the program! #the professor asked for an additional evaluation (still anonymous) and I'm torn about how brutal to be #because on the one hand it was an enlightening course and I am definitely better equipped as a historian than I was three months ago. #on the other hand every single one of my classmates had completely given up by the end because no matter what we did it wasn't good enough #and also the professor was just fucking mean a whole bunch. But in that subtle way where you feel crazy for noticing. #so the class was horrible but I don't want him to feel horrible but also maybe he deserves it??? I can't even tell if he's actually a dick #or just acts like one #which is perhaps not a meaningful distinction but if he doesn't mean to I'd feel bad being too harsh #though several incidents make me think he meant to #blegh. It'll all be over by midnight! #And then I can focus on studying for women's history and - joy of joys - writing a syllabus about Victorian fashion and politics #I fucking love historical fashion that's going to be absurdly fun