#but no I've been reading and highlighting sources for my capstone during slow times at work for the entire week

[pearl-kite]

got sent home early today because we're properly staffed and I was one of the earliest in

it felt less optional than the last few times I went home early though, and was close to three hours early, which, on top of how That One Pharmacist irked me about me trying to do some of my capstone reading in between customers, had me going home nearly livid

decided TODAY I AM GOING TO GET THAT FUCKING BIKE DOWN AND GO RIDE

eventually did

got on bike

started to ride

holyfuckingshitIamtoooutofshapeforthis

I only made it a few blocks before I had to turn around :c

I can do squats fine, btw. I am regularly squatting at work to grab script bags on the bottom hanger and standing straight up from that squat unaided. My legs are not pathetic by any means

My biking muscles, on the other hand, apparently wanted to have a good laugh

#kite rambles #I've been feeling uncomfortable in my clothes lately #like I have tried VERY VERY hard to unlearn the body image issues my mom inadvertently tried very hard to instill in me #so I'm trying not to have an issue with the weight in terms of the number #but it is hard to ignore that my clothes have begun to feel a bit restrictive lately #and I can't afford to just go buy new ones #so my deal with myself is to start taking the bike out after work on shifts that end at 4 or 5 (or 2:30 >:c ) #so today was day 1 I guess #but no I've been reading and highlighting sources for my capstone during slow times at work for the entire week #TODAY that one pharm was like 'you can't do non-work things like that' #like hi bitch you're not actually my boss and literally no one else has had an issue despite me very clearly not hiding it so fuck off #if I hadn't been the only one sent early I honestly would have felt a bit targeted though #so maybe it's time to look elsewhere for a job #cause I was not shy about letting them know I wasn't happy to leave close to three hours early #and her response was basically tough luck it's going to happen a lot over the summer when we actually have proper staffing #and it's like oh okay well then maybe I should find somewhere that won't cut my hours #or will at least sympathize with me about it #GUYS I HAVE BEEN SO SHORT TEMPERED LATELY HELP #I don't know if it's a meds thing or not and I worryyyyy