#but the way he so bravely swoops in to save Nicki

[apoptoses]

do you ever make yourself sad before bed thinking about how Armand’s hostility and desperation towards Lestat comes partly from the fact that Lestat came first to rescue Nicki and then to try and help Louis and Claudia, but no one Armand knew ever actually attempted to rescue or help him?

#not bg3 giving me meta fodder for vc #I feel like there’s an essay to be made from this but my life is on fire and I lack the spoons #in their early relationship Armand wants to hurt Lestat just as much as he wants Lestat to save him #he’s not just jealous of the way Lestat lives so freely #but the way he so bravely swoops in to save Nicki #when to Armand’s knowledge nobody ever even attempted to do that for him #so it’s no wonder he hates him as much as he admires him #Lestat is the hero he wishes he had and it’s inevitable Armand become a bitter thing from meeting and being rejected by him #and want to punish him for being capable of giving others the things Armand himself wished for #and though he grows into someone who can offer kindness and hospitality to others #I wonder if he believes he deserves to receive it himself #or if his offers of hospitality at Trinity gate or taking care of sleeping Lestat are ways for him to be in control of a situation #when someone else is needing help #and avoid his feelings about needing to receive help himself #so much to think about and not enough spoons to fully explore ir 🤧 #vc meta #armand/lestat