#byan is used to having their problems ignored or made out to be less than they really are

[byanyan]

byan gets into a lot of trouble at school and, while yes, most of the time it is their own fault, there are plenty of times where they get in shit for retaliating and protecting themself against those who intentionally harass & try to hurt them. even in these situations though, byan tends to take the brunt of any punishment because they don't bother trying to explain that they were simply defending themself. used to not being listened to or believed, to having the blame fall on them because they're the one known for their attitude & outbursts, they no longer see any point in wasting their breath fighting to explain what really happened - they'd rather just be given whatever punishment lies in store for them so they can get out of the principal's office and on with their day.

similarly, they won't speak out when they're being targeted & bullied. it's a waste of time & effort, and they see 'tattling' on some other student who's making their life miserable as a pathetic, weak thing to do, an admission of defeat - even when the other's actions are literally causing them harm. they'd rather take care of it themself. violently. ...something which has led to their expulsion from at least two different schools.

#they've broken at LEAST one kid's nose for mocking their struggle with reading #no one said their retaliation isn't often excessive #even if it is sometimes justified. SOMETIMES. #anyway u know me I'm in bed curled up trying to sleep & being attacked with thoughts that I have to write down so I don't lose them #byan is used to having their problems ignored or made out to be less than they really are #bc that's how it's been for most of their life #as a younger kid they definitely TRIED to speak out when they're wrongfully accused but #by 17 their rep has only gotten worse so they're believed less and less so what's the fuckin point in fighting it you know? #even if they get kicked from this school there's always another they'll get sent to. and another after that one too. #(also they hate to admit when someone is affecting them so when someone makes it their mission to make their life hell #they'd rather just get revenge & literally fight it out. the problem there though? they don't always come out on top. #and ultimately that makes the situation so much worse for them) #ahdjgjsg these thoughts are kinda scattered forgive me it's sleep time #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ HEADCANON ⋮ DANGER IN THE FABRIC OF THIS THING I MADE.