#endless reading of trigun fanfic. no time for my own writing endeavors

[orcelito]

of all things, seeing goro and sumi interact makes me wanna work on the next ladue chapter more than anything else the past like 2 weeks

Wild

#speculation nation #brain is just 'vashwood vashwood vashwood vashwood vashwood' etc etc etc #endless reading of trigun fanfic. no time for my own writing endeavors #but. im so close to finishing chapter 3 of ladue... so close... i just need to get back into it #... not rn tho. or the next few days probs. not a good time. #honestly tho it's making me remember how good writing is for my health overall #bc when i want to write i Have to take care of my health. get proper sleep & eat regularly & dont drink alcohol #bc i have to be in tip top condition to have writing brain. it keeps me in line. #the past week and a half has just been me Relentlessly pursuing my current hyperfixations #to the point of neglecting my health. case and point: me getting 3 hours of sleep for NO fucking reason (aside from trigun focus) #writing brain hasnt mattered so ive only been eating one or two meals a day. and ive been drinking a bit more often #though that also might be bc of my mental state 🤔 still no more than 2 drinks at a time #but ive gone from drinking Maybe once a month to like once a week. if not more often. #idk. it's meant as a relaxing kinda thing. god knows i need the stress relief. but it's still not great for me. #i still havent done my dishes and my fingernails r too long but i have no energy to trim them #aka. the experience of being actively in the throes of a hyperfixation is both Wonderful and terrible. my body is falling apart! #and this is with TWO!!!!! hyperfixations. trigun is definitely the more powerful but the fe:engage is there too #im. gonna go to bed early tonight. i have therapy in the morning :P #aka this is my 'i am alive' post but like only barely lmfao. ugh im so fucked with this lab.