#i can't think abt him for longer than two seconds bc then i make myself sad lol <3

[bylertruther]

not to be too real but since we're talking about it... we always talk about will feeling lonely which is fair, but... it is such an Ugly, isolating, and genuinely heart-wrenching feeling to be the odd one out in your family, and to watch them treat others who aren't related to you the way you wish they would treat you, to watch them perform their familial roles with them and not you.

nancy's the only person in his family that mike could talk to, the only person that has the same trauma and would understand, and yet... he can't. they don't ever talk unless it's to be snippy and bite. nancy spends more time caring about max and will than she does mike, her own little brother.

holly is too young for him to bond with like that. she's just barely a kid, one that still needs to be cared for.

his mom tries her best, but he doesn't feel comfortable being vulnerable with her. considering the fact that she did everything "right" according to society's standards and married their dad of all people, i doubt he feels comfortable showing her who he really is. he lets her hug him when he's at his lowest, but we don't see them actually connecting.

his dad is just some ghost that haunts his house. he doesn't care about mike or think highly of him at all. the only times we've seen him pay mike any attention are when he belittles his interests, mocks him, punishes him, or shuts him down by telling him to listen to his mother. the only support he gets from him is financial in nature.

meanwhile, everyone else has a family they can turn to. dustin, despite lying to his mother to keep her out of his shenanigans, seems to have a decent relationship with her. even if he doesn't, he still has steve and robin. lucas is shown to have a healthy relationship with his parents and erica. will and el have their family.

max's situation is different, but she has the backing of the party; people that love her and actively try to help her and pull her back into the world of the living. she isn't thrust into a leadership role that doesn't allow for vulnerability. she has nancy who is willing to fight monsters for her, el who literally performed a miracle for her, and lucas who has stood by her since the beginning.

and mike... well. he has will back now, sure, but... things have been different between them for a long time now, even if they're both trying their best to be how they were before. and before then, will obviously was in california, not returning his calls or reaching out, making mike feel like he'd lost him for good.

so... all that being said, it's not that surprising that mike is the way he is: riddled with abandonment issues, wanting to be needed, immediately apologizing whenever he dares to open up, inclined to give others the protection and comfort no one's ever given him, prone to jealousy and possessiveness, unable to be completely and wholly honest about what troubles him, not exactly the most open to new people, and someone with appallingly low self-esteem.

you know how they say people that are drowning don't always look like they're drowning? that's mike.

#mike #mine #wheeler #mike analysis #byler #i can't think abt him for longer than two seconds bc then i make myself sad lol <3 #will's story is fucked up but at least he has people that love him and help him and SEE him and that he feels comfortable being his #true self with. but mike? :/ sigh. #mike just bottles it up and overcompensates / gets his mind off of it by caring for someone else. #like in the van scene when he's opening up to will and then immediately tries to deflect bc he thinks it's not important. #like... mike... you ARE important. you're feelings aren't stupid. you aren't some worthless loser with nothing to offer people. #the way that he talks about himself and the lack of support he has in his life is like ... actually so fucking sad lmao! #bc he spent all that time with el and sent her all those letters and yet they never actually got to know each other. it wasn't anything of #value. it was just company. and he had will but things started changing and mike felt like will was pulling away from him. then they both #moved across the country and he tried to call will all those times but couldn't reach him. and then will never reached out first so he just #straight up felt like he'd lost will. and the remaining party members are great but like mike says they aren't will. so he was just alone. #bites my own hand bites my own hand bites my own hand bites—

[hannie-dul-set]

May i know the whole storyline/plot of us again because i love that work of yours so much 😍 im sad when you said that you're not planning to write it anymore because for me that kind of fic is hard to find 😭💔

hello bb! it warms my heart to hear abt ur love for us, again huhu. i had to much fun planing and writing the series and it's honestly a shame that i can't invest any more time into writing it :')) it's just so.....long......and complicated maybe even longer than peach tree HAGDJABSFJ so i can't rlly give u a /full/ breakdown of the events, but here's a somewhat abridged take of what was supposed to happen.

as we all know, mc can remember all of her past lives and on her current life, people, events, and memories form her first life started to recur. it can be interpreted as either (1) another chance given by the world to fulfill the first love that she had lost during her first life, (2) relive the tragedies that occurred.

ofc, whichever of the two will become the ending, it all depends on the mc's actions throughout the story, and even when things seemed doomed to repeat, things can still change and maybe all it takes is a second chance.

the story set in the past is as cliche as it can get HAHAHHAHA y/n, the commoner sister of an apothecary, and na jaemin (or han daegang, in this case) the 2nd prince of their kingdom fall in love. star-crossed. etc. etc. jaemin's mother Did Not Like that idea at all and somehow rumors spread throughout the entire village that y/n did some sorcery or witchcraft or whatever to make the prince fall for him (bcs her sister is a traditional doctor what the fucking prejudice). this, ofc, gives the queen a reason to punish the poor girl. hence the flashback in chapter 4(?) i think about her running in the forest --- where she was ultimately banished from capital, literally chased out of the damned place and ended up dying from a gunshot after falling off a cliff <////3.

(past) jaemin secretly followed the guards that suddenly went off that night and tried looking for mc as well, but was too late. he ended up witnessing everything --- mc's death --- which is why he gets panic attacks at present day when there are any loud/abrupt/sudden noises; another instance of the past being carried out into the present.

(side note there was supposed to be a scene in chapter 5 where out two leads got wound up in the park during a festival and fireworks started going off. at the first bang, you noticed that he wasn't well and before his condition could get worse, you brought your hands to the side of his face and covered his ears <//////3 the tension. the eye contact. and for the first time in his current life, jaemin didn't mind the sounds of fireworks exploding jEEZ THIS WAS SUCH A WASTE).

ahem anyway.

the rest of the present day scenes in the fic basically follow the same formula as the past but ofc in the modern setting + y/n trying her best to fight back the god damned Feelings and trying to be a bitch to jaem bcs him + you = disaster......but aha.......who could resist......na jaemin.......especially when he's looking at u with does eyes and saying "please let me like you" CMON how could u not break.

unfortunately, i have only outlined until chapter 7 and only have a vague idea of what happens next HHAHHAHAH but eventually y/n gives in and holds onto the hope that she can make things different this time around, shit happens but all in all it's a happy ending i would literally hate myself if i made this life's ending tragic as well HAHHAHSFAJSH

i'm sorry if this doesn't satisty you HUHU if u want you can ask for some more details regarding chapters 5-7 bcs those are the only parts that i have outlined 😔😔😔 thank you for loving us, again, bb! it really means a lot.

#💌: anon #help this is so LONG #us again