#i wanna downplay the problem bc it's truly not that big a deal in some ways

[welcometogrouchland]

I will feel so tired that it's like my atoms are coming undone and I'm being made unreal...and then I will have a little chocolate treat and for 15 minutes I am whole and present again. Then the horrors

#ramblings of a lunatic #i remember feeling like this at the peak of my burnout and fatigue before #(also the same burnout and fatigue that took my interests and creativity and ground them into dust) #so I've concluded that i will just try and make it through the next two days as best i can (I GET FANCY RESTAURANT FOOD ON WEDNESDAY) #and then I'll just try to let my mental and physical health recuperate while finding excuses to hang w/ friends #cause that'll stave off thr madness of isolation #i wanna watch my shows and movies too and I'll finally be able to w/o guilt after the last exam :cries: #anyway. if you've noticed an uptick in me just sayin shit recently (in a way that may or may not be cause for concern) #it's bc I'm so close to getting out of the mines that having to wait any longer is driving me clinically insane #i wanna downplay the problem bc it's truly not that big a deal in some ways #but then i remembered that this is a) the longest I've gone w/o seeing my pals in like. nearly a month #and I've been at home doing the same stuff everyday for nearly a month too #and also IT'S THE FINAL EXAM I'M EVER GONNA DO BEFORE COLLEGE. IT'S A BIG DEAL MAN #so actually. yes I'm a bit of a drama queen but my slice of life problems have a place for mediation and bemoaning #but it's fine. bc we're gonna kill it #I'm gonna do sooooooo good on this test (<- manifesting) #it's. a little high pressure bc the last time i did a test for this subject (that I'm generally very good at) i majorly beefed it #but I've learned since then and I'm hoping. praying. also working hard but mostly hoping and praying #anyway. I gotta sleep soon bc i got so little sleep last night bc of the heat that i almost started crying at breakfast #LET'S GO LESBIANS (the lesbians are me. it's just me talking into a hall of mirrors)