#i’m so proud of him!!!!! an elc!!! in arizona!!!! he’s from manitoba so i’m guess he’s gonna love the sunshine

[moregraceful]

MONTANA ONYEBUCHI SIGNED AN ELC WITH ARIZONA COYOTES AND I’M SO PROUD OF HIM I COULD BARF!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!

Yotes fans you are getting SUCH a good one. I don’t have much lore about him, mostly just a vibe check, so here are my main facts you need to know about Montana:

1. Loves the boys. LOVES the boys. I think our coaching staff wished he had loved the boys a little less, because the way Montana loves is simply “I don’t like how you looked my small frail forward, so I’m going to kill you in real life.” He is so protective of the boys, especially of the younger guys. He had two years with Cuda (undrafted out of uhhh the WHL I think but this is also why I am barfing, because he was NEVER sure thing) and by year two he was like I will do literally anything for these guys. I personally loved that because I found it very sexy that his love language is murder. If you don’t like fighting and guys who take dumbass penalties, you will hate Montana, but his protective instinct is so strong and I think it’s delightful!!! I can’t even call him a goon really, because it’s never like he’s starting shit just to start shit, he’s not out here causing trouble for fun, it is ALWAYS because he took offense at how someone was behaving around his teammates.

2. He is so hot it is unreal. he had all of San Jose drooling. Our one (1) local podcast guy, a married dude with a kid, once interviewed him and started off the interview with “has there ever been a bad photo taken on you?” AND THERE NEVER HAS BEEN. (Montana took this comment SO graciously, he is an icon.) Like I try to stick to my age bracket generally but oh my god. He had the whole fanbase (there are about 10 of us) sweatin

3. TOTAL sweetheart with the fans. I never heard any fan talk shit about him in the arena, and the nature of the Cuda fanbase in San Jose is such that someone is always talking shit. To my knowledge, always willing to take photos, always willing stop and say hi, never out here with a huge ego, doesn’t take anything for granted. Just an enormous man with a huge heart who was really appreciative that San Jose took a chance on an undrafted overager. He will probably be like this in Arizona.

Tl;dr absolutely lionheart-coded, I hope he finds a king in Arizona!!! Sadly the rumor is that he did not want to stay in San Jose because San Jose would not let him play injured, which is. lol. why are they like this. I guess he did not appreciate watching his friends get the shit knocked out of them day in and day out while he could not protect them. I assume he spends a good deal of time with the Roadrunners, which is hilarious bc they are like the Cuda’s second (maybe first now that the Heat are in Calgary) biggest rivalry and he got into it with them five million times last season. But I truly truly wish him well and I am so proud he signed an ELC somewhere and I hope he thrives in Arizona. Also if he goes to Australia for the Global Series I will cry real tears of joy and pride.

#free agent szn aka kasper moregraceful’s Just Some Guy vibe check #i truly do not know much about him like don’t really have any fun facts bc san jose media kinda didn’t care about him #but i cared. i cared so damn much #i’m so proud of him!!!!! an elc!!! in arizona!!!! he’s from manitoba so i’m guess he’s gonna love the sunshine #especially after california garbage winter last year #ok i gotta stop gushing bc i’m not actually SAYING anything but i do just love him so so much and i’m so excited for him #hockey for ts #Just Some Guy vibe check