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#internet safety is getting lax 🙈
boomerang109
·
8 months
Text
i came home, panicked about one thing, and my toilet was leaking. bathroom floor is covered in water and brown particles. oddly, this has not improved my mood
#i just want to be a child again. i understand being a child was also miserable I am not glorifying my childhood
#i was in pain and sad and lonely
#BUT I WAS SAFE AND CARED FOR AND I NEVER QUESTIONED THAT no matter how much pain I was in
#what I wouldn’t give for everything to hurt because I was so overstimulated by school and being bullied
#being a kid had such clear cause and effect. being an adult is just…I am guilty and I want to cry everytime I think about the fact that I’m
#here. i miss something that never existed and I’m the only one who is trying to remember a person who never existed but is important to me
#(cause it’s me—I’m the only one who cares about preserving my childhood. my parents don’t give a damn. they were so busy surviving they
#don’t remember it or care either)
#why the fuck am I getting emails about a pizza party we didn’t ask for were an actual club now we don’t need your planned events fuck off
#the way I was about to brag about our club name by just name dropping my school which would then make it so easy to find me holy shit my
#internet safety is getting lax 🙈
#boom’s bad days
#omg I just got reccommended ‘boom blogs high’ what if I got high I would feel so much better
#i keep just coping sober cause like. not relying on substances. but I don’t actually have skills rn to improve my issues so like. substances
#are more helpful tbh 🙈
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