#like I'm sorry I don't have the patience for maintenance and want a permanent solution but die mad about it

[amplexadversary]

I get that today isn’t the time to bitch about this, but I’m going to do it anyway. 

You know, for a country that’s supposedly all about freedom, the US is a whiny, cowardly little BITCH about medicine. Can’t get the good hormones, can’t get the iris pigment removal, and at the same time corpos get a free pass to screw anyone who doesn’t have the money for a lawyer. So *I* can’t do what I want, when if affects ~nobody~, but someone else can just waltz in and ruin lives. Real committed to that ideal, I see. 

Fuck the USA. I don’t even care about the stupid cyclical politics anymore, even though the next jackoff conservative we elect is going to undo anything good Biden does. I’m at the point of having an insurmountable philosophical conflict with the whole country and culture because it’s hypocritical, pro money, and anti-science. And the weather in all the states with decent politics fucking sucks. I just ~looooove~ having to choose between wearing decent fucking clothing that looks good on me and not dying of heat exhaustion. 

I swear, I don’t even have suicidal ideation anymore but I’m still probably going to self-harm within the next 5-ish years because we don’t get the safer way of doing what I want. 

#ignore morg #yes this is meant to be hurtful #so I'm GOING to complain until I feel better and go back to having no fucking personality #I'm starting to agree with fucking Moira O'Dorian from overwatch and that's objectively fucking scary #like I'm sorry I don't have the patience for maintenance and want a permanent solution but die mad about it #it's my body and my shitty genetics and if it isn't going to be flawlessly functional anyway it should at least look how I want #also DAMN it's time to add another three favorites of mine who would absolutely fucking garrote me from that rant #and yeah I'd deserve it but that doesn't mean I care and it doesn't mean I'll apologize because it's true #actually make that FIVE #hell I'd egg most of them on #there are probably things I've forgotten about and my guess is that list is in the high thirties by now #especially if I include ex-faves that I kind of hate now because someone whedoned all over everything #goddamn if ONE more person patronizes me about a feature I want gone or changed I will do something ill-advised #no. it doesn't change color. you're just boring. #no. muscle defects are not 'cute' and every reminder I get pushes me closer to having someone take a knife to my face #fuck just throw out the whole body someone with worse taste can have it and be happy #enjoy the FUCKING asthma