#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Anon I’m 5’7” my ring size is a 7 I was born on a Monday and I drink milk straight from the carton. Blatantly. No apologies. are you still obsessed with me

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Homoerotic monologue anon just FYI this is how u got me rn

#in case u were wondering #<333333333 #mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Homoerotic monologue anon I think you deserve to know that you’re obsessed with someone who had an autistic hyperfixation on Alcatraz as a child, the prison in general but specifically the famous escape. There was this documentary I watched 3747747 times about it and I would take NOTES. If I’d have had cancer my make a wish would deadass have been to visit Alcatraz island. And reenact the escape to see if those fuckers could have lived. So do u still ache for me

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

THEYRE BACK GUYS THEYRE BACK FJDJJSAJJS MY ANGEL HAS RETURNED AT LAST

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon #MY BELOVED

[its-the-ratdawg]

Between the multitude of quotes from you I plan to include and the fact that you’re the first person to give me advice about it I may as well credit you as a co creator. “This latest fic sponsored by… well idk their name but they’re the reason it’s here soooooo”

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

If I have notifs turned on for you just know it’s because I love you enough to take that emotional bullet to the chest every time I get a Tumblr notification and I THINK it’s from my beloved anon and it’s ACTUALLY just you reblogging some gay horny cannibal shitpost

#ily guys #but they #they have a hold on me #mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

It’s so homophobic that Apple and Tumblr won’t let me change my Tumblr ask notifications to go off at some ungodly level of volume and garish sound so that my heart rate can spike when I heart it. Because I just know I’ve got an ask from them

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Mysterious homoerotic monologue anon you know when Will and Hannibal are in therapy and Hannibal asks about his mother and Will says the thing about low hanging fruit. Those vibes. We can have those

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon #you have a gorgeous soul btw #<<33333

[its-the-ratdawg]

SOS send stupid asks. My ask box is lonely without them

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Literally anytime you do something or say something

Tumblr: “I dub thee will Graham”

I mean they have a point but it’s still funny

let me just say ive got YOU to thank for a fair bit of that so i'm glad you enjoy it. what is will graham, Some Guy ™️, without his poetically versed obsessed ridiculously charming maybe serial killer cannibal to complement him?

(wait but you see it too????) (like im not actually kinning its just EVery time i DO ANYTHING) (even still i love this little joke)

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

committed the classic male blunder (accidentally told my spouse i didnt like their cooking when i actually do)

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Mysterious homoerotic monologue anon wants me. Fish fear me.

(Okay but the “fish fear me” thing is so fucking funny to me) (because right up until I hook ‘em, those fuckers don’t know I EXIST) (I’m sitting on the shore drinking a cherry coke holding a stick) (they’re swishing around in the lake being fish) (why the fuck would they fear me) (like do I think they worry actively about me until I become an immediate problem for them???? NO.) (they probably fear me as I’m reeling them in because who wouldn’t) (they definitely fear me when I stick my thumb through their gills to get my stupid asshole catch picture with their writhing bodies) (they fear me when I’m gutting them and then severing their head and then tossing their innards into the fucking lake) (all understandable) (but I’m not some kind of menace amongst the fishes. They don’t give a damn) (I know this I’m self aware)

#rat dog fishing #mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Homoerotic anon is gonna pull up like. What happened to you

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Dude. We’re like if their texts were leaked

#will and Hannibal #probably season 2 and post season three #am I right or am I right or am I right #mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Hey by the way everyone except homoerotic monologue anon if you submit to me an anonymous ask just lmk if you aren’t them because otherwise I will assume that it is and I’ll hit you with my cannibal rizz and idk if y’all are ready for that

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon

[its-the-ratdawg]

Alternate reality where I never changed the settings to allow anonymous asks

#mysterious homoerotic monologue anon #this would be so sad