#or that I can have fun with meaningless things like TV and fashion and you'll be ok with my indulgence of the flesh

[yeslordmyking]

Lord forgive me. I'd rather go back to having fun than serving You. I don't see doing Your work as fun and satisfying, and think I can have a little of both. Never let me go back. Let complete holiness and rejection of the world satisfy me as Your word promises it's supposed to.

#never let me go back to TV with sin. never let me go back to music with sin. never let me go back to YouTube with sin #never let me go back to loving and supporting sinners. never let me go back to selfish dreams that only serve me #never let me go back to setting up a future and a hope in this life instead of Heaven #never let me go back to being in the world and thinking as long as I don't do certain things it guarantees me Heaven. #and if I do go back never let me smile or feel joy again until I permanently repent of enjoying this sinful world and return to You #it's not hard. our flesh just thinks it is because it loves this life. shame on us. shame on me. take it from me. destroy my weak heart #destroy everything I think will make me happy. even if it's not bad for me. take everything from me except You so I don't love it too much #never let me be that foolish again #even if it absolutely crushes me to look at everything I love or want and say 'i hate that and I hope God never lets me have it' #even if my weak flesh and heart give out under the heartbreak of rejecting the world I love. let my soul leave that flesh and enter Heaven #the only thing that is true and matters #or.... let me be wrong and allowed to love some things that may not benefit You but don't harm my soul. if that exists #because I'm »vexxed« and I feel like I'm always in trouble with You Lord simply for hoping and dreaming #that maybe I can handle abundance. or maybe there are good celebrities that obey Your gospel that I can be a fan of #or that I can have fun with meaningless things like TV and fashion and you'll be ok with my indulgence of the flesh #kill all of those lies and make me obedient and devout without being compromised by flesh and emotions anymore #it's not hard it's not hard it's not hard it's not hard it's not hard #hear my prayers #christian struggles #disobedient #disappointing God #shame on me #lover of worldly people #lover of the world #lover of sin #lukewarm #have mercy on me Lord #forgive me Lord #killing my heart to save my soul #be holy not happy