#other ppl with strong subcultural identification/aesthetics in general. we get all these fuckin freaks [perj.] crawling out of the woodwork

[custer-mp3]

not to disc horse or engage in Not Like The Other Dudesism or anything but prev & prev prev is just like. yeah.jpg. i'm so fucking frustrated rn that i've been being stalked for the last month and a half by someone who spent the last day i willingly spoke to him yelling at me for "not being at all what [he] thought" & i'm a lying liar who lies about who i am when like. i've never been anything but myself, i'm super up front about my expectations for people & situations, and one of my strongest character traits is i've known EXACTLY who i am & what i believe & have since i was a little kid. and like. it's not my fault that he made up some version of me in his head based on scattered snatches of interests & half-facts misinterpreted due to bias even though irl i'm actually just a cantankerous deadpan old man who wants to be left alone. i never misrepresented myself so it's very much not my fault but the disconnect between who i am and what people think i am is so huge cuz of whatever weird baggage or preconceptions they have about people who look like me or have similar surface interests or jobs that they all come preloaded with, and i think it would be way less frustrating if it Didn't. Keep. Fucking. Happening.

#i know i've said it before but there's a huge diff btwn wanting your partner to be self-actualized & happy & Their Best Version #& wanting to mold or remake them or round off parts of them that you simply Don't Find Desirable #and not in a 'oh this mf is UNCIVILIZED & LIVING IN FILTH' way but trying to remodel their entire life both inner & outer #to be more attractive for you to jerk it to #and it sucks it keeps happening to me but i feel like this is a problem for goths & #other ppl with strong subcultural identification/aesthetics in general. we get all these fuckin freaks [perj.] crawling out of the woodwork #claiming we're sooooo hot and sooooo cool and soooo fun to be around but actually they want to cut off all the pieces that don't fit the #edges of their fantasy #& because we know we're a niche product to start with. a lot of us put up with it a lot longer than we should. lmao.