#physical and mental. but at least it isn’t hopeless yknow? it sucks but life goes on and it doesn’t suck 100% of the time

[zeb-z]

thinking about how honest the hope is in disco elysium, if that makes sense. how you face consequences for the actions and life you can’t remember. how your nightmares come back and they just might be there to stay. how you still wake up in pain and have to very actively fight off the cravings of your old addictions. how it isn’t easy trying to chose not just life, but living better, living for yourself. how it doesn’t mean any of the problems will go away, or the pain will stop, but it gives you an option other than constant suffering. there’s always a silver lining, it’s just a matter of being able to look up and find it.

hope isn’t always easy, and sometimes it is a choice, but in a torn up world and a torn up body, it’s something. it’s not always pretty or perfect, it’s clumsy and sometimes foolish and hard to keep close, it’s difficult, and maybe it’s all you have but it’s something - streets and sodium lights, the sky, the world, you’re alive

#and you damn well better keep it that way #it’s honest because trauma is still something you have to face and go through no matter how ugly #and it doesn’t just go away. things can get better and then something can hit you again. and that’s okay #idk something something it’s waves in an ocean and sometimes it’s a storm and hope keeps you afloat but it doesn’t mean you can get out of #the ocean. it’s very real in this #does any of this make any sense #or is it just 2 am and I’m stringing words together that sound nice but make no sense #i just think. so much specifically about that last dream with Dolores dei. how it promises to be an ongoing occurance #how even with Kim and solving the case and starting new he’ll still struggle with his traumas #physical and mental. but at least it isn’t hopeless yknow? it sucks but life goes on and it doesn’t suck 100% of the time #idk I’m just. thinking #disco elysium #harry du bois #z speaks