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survivingjapan · 7 years

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EPISODE 2 “Let Me Go Get Some Pants On” Junior

So Mist was the first boot, and I'm sittin here just thanking god that it wasn't me. Now to slay only 24 other fools!

So that first round was SO MUCH FUN! So much happened and I love and adore each and every one of my tribemate <3 <3 oh fuck I'm not a hero Honestly, these people are very hard to talk to and everything feels forced, but thanks to Jonathan calling out Kage for his creepy stalking antics, I think I've made a new friend! Because all friendships are founded on hate for another person! <3 now im just hoping junior doesnt mcfuck up so that I get another day of relaxation

okay so everything is going well, I heckin love my mini alliance with Linus, Kage, Alex and Tommy. I mean I talk more to Alex and Kage but this alliance is cute and I am glad to be part of something so soon in the game. Hopefully this works out. Anyways, rn Junior and some Ashton guy are seeing how long they can stand. Will this challenge take 72 hours? Possibly. Do I believe in Junior? Of heckin course.

So I am not the first honorary 26th placer or TS! However, I'm mad because we voted out a potential ally in Mist and it's all because Alex Crooks is being... himself. Like I'm starting to like him yeah but he's being too controlling over things. He got the Malaysians together with the Solomons minus Steffen but like. Why vote out Mist? I'm just getting a little frustrated because Pippa and Alex are like, becoming this horrifying power couple thing since they're both theater nerds and I'm like! Pippa! Game now dick later! If those 2 continue to control things then Crooks gotta go. Sorry Peepo <3 Anyway Ashton did THAT for us in this duels of duality thing so yay Ashton. I wanna keep him around as a number for myself so this is good, and now the lowest I can officially get is 24th :~) I just need Steffen out of here. But now Isaac is saying he would like Drew out more just because Steffen trusted him with the whole extra vote and I'm like okay? Whom care? He might trust you but this is what Steffen does every game. People just say oh we'll get him next time. Oh we'll get him next time. Oh we'll get him next time UNTIL it's like 10 more rounds in and then he fucks you over. So I'm not having it! Maybe I can plant little anti-Steffen seeds in people like Ashton, Trace, and Dom. Maybe Ruthie too depending on how close we think she is to Steffen. I just want to take the people out that I think will benefit me in the long run. And yes one of those people will be Drew, but I realize I'm being a hypocrite because Drew does the same thing Steffen does but right now we have a majority alliance with Drew so taking out Steffen over a number that will potentially hurt us if taken out seems like the better plan to me. Just.....saying...........

ASHTON I AM SO FUCKING PROUD OF YOU! FROM BEING FIRST VOTED OUT TO SURVIVING THE FIRST VOTE TO CARRYING THE WHOLE TEAM TO IMMUNITY!!! Honestly, working with Ashton is one of my #1 goals in this game, and I'm happy we're safe, so I don't have to worry about tribal, especially considering tomorrow would've been a pretty tough day for me to worry about it.

As for the twist, I don't think this twist is going to go on for TOO long, but if it does, and we merge without a tribe swap, I'd be shocked, but I feel that won't be the case, and I should be off of this tribe sooner rather than later to start making more connections and dominating more motherfuckers. :)

On 8/29/17, at 9:42 AM, Steffen Bøhn wrote: > so we had to pick a leader to rep the heroes tribe, I know I didn’t want to do it, so I suggested picking a name out of my cup, so I ripped up 3 papers and put the heroes names on it, but I ripped 1 paper smaller than the others and put Ashton’s name on it, so once it was mixed in I could tell which was his when I picked it

https://youtu.be/SQbfbMWJD4U

Are these people gonna vote out Brian over Pat? Like.... really? Pat has deadass done NOTHING this game so far. We are six days in and he has yet to send a single message to me or a good half of the villains tribe. Yet somehow Brian is a better person to boot over Pat. I'm like extra upset because I actually REALLY like Brian and I don't want him to go, but I also know that it's not my place to try and swing the vote the other way. If Pat stays, it's only going to make the silence more awkward. I don't need him here. He does nothing to benefit my game. Brian has been a friend to me ever since this game began. It's sad. Maybe it'll be for the better, but I knew I was gonna have to rely on making new friends to last in this game :/ having to vote one of them out this early is gonna suuuuck.

welp junior just said it's Brian so may as well prepare to be up junior's ass all season since we're following his lead already. I'm fucking mad about life, mad I couldn't search for an idol for six whole days, mad that I'm losing the only person I fucking LIKED so far....... but I guess we have to look at the bigger picture. just bc I'm losing Brian doesn't mean that I don't have friends. I still have gotten close to Alex and Jonathan (who just messaged me "I'd rather do pat!!!!") (Aka I can go get fucked at this point) and I guess Kage and Junior, too. I'm all for blindsides. But I HATE having to vote out Brian. Sorry Zack :/

If anybody's having flashbacks to Arabia that's totally justified. So in a Skype call this morning, the alliance of five eventually, after much dilly-dallying, decided to target Pat. Wait, what? They picked Brian? What the fuck? That's...okay, fine. We're targeting Brian. Not Pat. Who sucks. Brian. Who doesn't. Obviously I don't love this. And on the one hand goddammit I SHOULD go for this. Buuuuuuuuuuut What if....I didn't What if......I didn't like how Kage was pitching secretly to split the votes between Pat and Brian and what if I didn't like that Kage gave Brian a bad location to search for the Idol and what if......I voted for Pat instead Hmm. Thoughts. We'll see what happens. There's still 90 minutes to go. Anything could happen!

So after the awkwardness passed that we have to go to tribal, people gradually started to open the game talks and ultimately, although there was a minor conflict between Kage and Jonathan, the two targets seem to settle on Brian and Pat for their lack of social presence thus far And then someone along the way decided that it would be Brian leaving so it seemed to be going his direction but like.....I don't want to vote him? And I think others feel the same? So I started to voice that opinion to people (which was risky and maybe a mistake but i ain't scared) and it seems the tide might be turning (or already had turned and I just jumped on eagerly). If this vote goes against Pat instead of Brian I'll feel MUCH better...but I am putting myself out there by doing this and these are big villains so there might be another plot in the making...... sorry but I love my bf by proxy (thx Zack for donating him this season!) and I don't want to vote him out.....

earlier today i went to tommy bc i know he has connections and i wanted to plant the seed that me being here is in his own best interest so i was like look we're both the only winners here if one of us leaves the other is an automatic target and thats true.. but then cut to 5 hours later and this vote is a mess and i'm pissed bc i wasnt a part of ANY planning conversations about this vote so clearly thats a red flag! i've only been told second hand from people what "people" are saying and "i heard....." when its not like these things just come out of nowhere conversations were had and people came together to make these plans and throw out names of brian and pat and i wasnt a part of any of them so i hate everyone!! anyway tommy wants to vote out brian and i was like eh whatever ill do anything but then i start talking to other people and apparently more people are voting out pat??? idk the truth bc i dont have the relationships with people on this tribe to like know the full tea but it seems like more people are voting out pat right now so tommys asking me what im doing and im like look dude i think i might vote out pat and now tommys guilt tripping me [8/29/17, 8:27:55 PM] Tommy Shallow: :'( [8/29/17, 8:28:48 PM] Tommy Shallow: but I thought we were going to be in an alliance together lmao its kinda funny ahahahah anyway idk whats happening personally i think brian leaving would be better because we have gone against eachother in a couple games and i know hes close with steffen so he has connections on the other side vs pat the flop but on the other hand pat hasnt talked to me at all and if i vote with brian maybe that will be like hey we cool and im in the majority bc thats all i care about i just want to lay low but somehow im like caught in the middle bc people want me to do something even though it seems like the votes are set in stone

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f6KpNy00Yjk Second thing

Talking to Andrew about taking out Ruthie next, and I'm already proposing getting us to work with Steffen, which is good, and once I move to getting him to WANT to work with Trace and Dom, I'm almost settled in my ways of getting the people I trust on one side to trust the people I want to work with from the other side. I wouldn't mind staying in these tribes for awhile, because this means that I can take out a lot of people I don't wanna work with, and then once we swap, I know I can trust all the heroes going forward, and I can work on the villains. Divide and conquer man, divide and conquer..... Except I'm not dividing with anyone, it's just myself.

there's a new Jaiden in town... and his name is Kage Hamilton

RIP MY DUMBASS FOR SELF VOTING. Honestly I haven't had wifi all day and I feel bad for accidentally self voting but it doesn't seem like anyone really cares because in the end, Pat still went home. I mean which is good. However, once I came back to the land of the living, Jaiden was telling me about how Kage was basically making things hella stressful like an hour before the vote??? I mean our alliance was hoping to vote Brian so I assume that is what Kage was telling everyone. But apparently they would have none of it because everyone likes Brian. I am starting to think I may need to be careful as to what I say to that alliance, and make sure Kage or any of the other boys get the wrong idea of what I am planning. ALSO WHAT THE HECK, SARAH AND I JUST REALIZED THERE ARE ONLY 5 GIRLS ON THIS SEASON?!?!? LIKE WHAT?!?!! This is basically screaming an all girls alliance, you watch it happen.

Well I've been majorly slacking with these confessionals lol but iM gonna take it all the way back to grade A robbery. Of course Judging is a subjective thing but idc the judges got it objectively wrong. It was simple, Our flag was there flag wasn't. I've got no idea how we lost that. So instantly my first thought after that is...Fuck me im getting francesca'd. First boot two times that'll be iconic i guess. Nobodies throwing out names until finally a mist crusade begins. I feel terrible for the guy. He just got fucked by moving on the same day. But when is this game ever fair. Mist goes unanimously all things are good.

Literally minutes after Mist goes we have to get ready for a live challenge and choose 3 people to compete. Since everyone else are adults and i'm a no-life teen obviously I volunteer. The challenge starts we randomly choose our leader and Yay it's me. My enthusiasm dies however when I hear the challenge...Pressure Cooker. FUCK ME NOOOOO. I wasn't ready for this!! but I sucked it up and got in for the long haul. When the briberiea began I started to realize though that thing could be perfect for my game. It shows my loyalty by not accepting any of those fucking awesome advantages. And it shows I have fight for our tribe by standing up there for 2 and a half hours. I was ecstatic when I won and kind of just collapsed cuz my left leg was in a lot of pain. Everyone was co gratulatorio me which was a nice feeling. Basically Things are going great for me rn. My closest allies are Johnny and Tommy at this point i think.

Kendall thought that Johnny was from India so she tried to rope him into an alliance with her, Alex C, him, and villains Sarah and Ashley. I'm shaking because he told me everything and basically (seemingly) trusts me completely. So my cracked ass tells Isaac everything and how we need to make a move on this and he's like we can't play this way. So I made a chart: http://prntscr.com/gern7w Me making this chart and talking to Isaac about it: https://pics.me.me/te-me-explaining-conspiracy-theories-to-my-friends-3324709.png So I'm gonna fuckin die and just put my explanation into a youtube video yeah

#returnrevengeredemption #confessionals

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viralhottopics · 7 years

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‘Are You The One?’ Recap: Hi My Name Is Tyranny And Im An Alcoholic

Hello everyone. I would like to thank my loyal followers for questioning my whereabouts on Twitter. I was actually on vacation, because Im not poor. Sorry, but watching these morons was just not a fucking option. I was zen AF and I dont need Carolinas crocodile tears ruining it, k thx.

ANYWAYS, so onto the episode. It was kind of eh, Im going to be honest. If youre looking for another reason to be annoyed by Giannas existence though, then it def delivered.

AFTER THE MATCH CEREMONY

They are all pumped about getting four beams. In fact, if you took a shot for every time someone said four fucking beams youd need to get stomach pumped four fucking times.

Tyranny is like Ossssssssssssssssvaldo is my match. Honestly can we just cut the accent though? Hes from Chicago for gods sake, not Italy.

Oswaldo is not so sure. Hes like she could be my match! Or she isnt! Yeah, thats pretty much how life works, actually.

Also, can we acknowledge the giant-ass drink Tee has the whole time? That cup is actually my favorite cast member this season.

Carolina and Hayden start having a pillow fight because FOUR FUCKING BEAMS, AMIRIGHT?

Now Carolina is very suddenly into Hayden. Carolinas emotions give me whiplash. Betsy DeVos nomination was more certain than this bitch.

Gianna is like “OH NO. NOT TODAY. I DID NOT LEAVE THE SOUTHSIDE FOR THIS.” Shes like I’M GOING TO CONTINUE TO PURSUE THIS MAN WHO TREATS ME SO WELL. Even though they are a confirmed no match. Makes total sense.

So you unfriend-zoned him to cock block him? Seems v fair. So when you go to sleep, do you leave Haydens balls under your pillow or on your nightstand? Let me know.

*Starts Twitter Poll* Is Gianna hot? Yes or No?

Tyler apologizes to Taylor and is like “I have no excuse for being the ‘big bad wolf’ in this.” So youre eating peoples grandmas now? Very Hannibal Lecter-chic. Not sure Tyler understands that hes referencing a fairytale, but hes pretty so well overlook it.

Hes like these girls are all over me wah, life is hard.

TAYLOR: Im mad *looks at Tylers beautiful face* but Im not like, thatttt mad

Hes like Im not that guy, you know that! Shes like,

TYLER: I want to dump Shannon and date you

EVERYONE AT HOME:

Gianna goes to have a talk with Hayden, which she announces for everyone to know. Shes from the Midwest, okay? Shes not used to this whole having brains thing, cut her some slack!

GIANNA: HEY CAMERA GUY IM GOING TO HAVE A TALK WITH HAYDEN ALSO GIANNA: were very low-key shhhh

Little Mike is like this is bullshit, they are not a match, they need to stop and its like SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK.

GIANNA: I dont want to stop you from doing something but stop fucking doing it. (Im not even making that up, thats an exact quote) HAYDEN: But I need to play the game GIANNA: Did I fucking stutter

So Hayden has relocated from friendzone island to being a little bitch island. Need a house warming gift, Hayden? Ill get you crowbar so you can pull your head out of your ass. Youre welcome.

Gianna and Hayden have sex, giving life to the newest Trump supporter Im sure. Carolina sees all of this and is like wtffffff. Shes like, totally in love with Hayden! Like, they spoke for a whole 10 minutes. Didnt that mean anything to him?

Andre is like “IF THEY FUCK THIS UP IM GOING TO BE PISSED” and Im like do it. Get mad. You wont. No balls.

Honestly, Gianna could probs take Andre in a fight. That girl should be a fuckin prison warden.

THE CHALLENGE

The challenge this week is for the dudes. The guys have to spin themselves and then go through an obstacle course. Then they have to shoot a basketball into the hoop of the girl they want to date. The person who shoots the third basketball in the hoop wins the date.

challenges sound like the hazing the gay frats do. Its all v weak.

The guys start the game and are falling all over the place. *plays Ed Sheeran*

Hayden is like, fuck it. Fuck this game. Idfc anymore, Im here for Gianna.

HAYDEN:I love Gianna

ME:

He decides to help Oswaldo win a date with Tee. See heres the thingI like Hayden, but I also think hes being very dumb. Its a hard spot for me rn. Really struggling.

Tee being proud of Oswaldo for winning is like Trump being proud of winning president. We all know he couldnt have won without Hayden/Russia.

Derrick and Joey are trying to win Rush Boobss date. Derrick wants to win because fuck Joey. Theyre shooting for legit five minutes. Seriously, Ive seen better shots from . When is the last time you played basketball? Third grade? Derricks like I played division I basketball! which sounds like an alternative fact to me.

Joey wins. So its Osvaldo/Tee and Joey/Rush Boobs.

Ryan tells them they are going to trapeze and Tee is like Im black, I shouldnt be in the air. How did you get to the Dominican Republic? Drive? Horseback? I didnt know your skin color made you less aerodynamic. I just saw and honestly, Im a fucking scientist now.

BACK AT THE HOUSE

Lets all agree that Tee is low-key alcoholic. Shes constantly sipping from that big-ass cup and it seems like they have a good connection. Could that be her match?

Eddie is talking to Alicia about how he is poor and shes like “LOL not me, cant relate to you peasant.” Eddie, you need to get your ass over to Kam where you fucking belong. Know your fucking place. Do not fuck this up for me, Eddie.

Tyler is trying to break up with Shannon and it is a train fucking wreck. Hes like I need to do the right thing and leave you. He actually stole the whole speech from Gabriella in .

REAL PICTURE OF TYLER:

Shannon is like “I feel dumb.” And she should, because she just got played. I feel bad for Shannon. Her voice makes me want to take a waltz off a bridge, but I do feel things, kind of.

Tylers like I didnt realize girls have feelings and get mad when you treat them poorly. Thats like saying I didnt know when you light shit on fire, it gets hot.

Meanwhile, Tee is very much trying to date rape Osvaldo. Its creepy tbh. If a guy was doing that to a girl on this show I would be dialing 911 by now. Tee, knock it off, it’s super gross.

They go to the boom boom room and literally boom boom because they break something. Oswaldo, way to not hold your ground.

Kam is oiling Eddie up and being goofy. I needed this.

Shes like I know Alicia and Eddy have a good friendship, Im not getting territorial, because this is a game show. I LOVE YOU KAM, I AM STARTING YOUR FAN CLUB. Shes so rational. Everyone be like her please.

THE DATE

Oswaldo is like this date will take our relationship to the next level, even though it already has gone to the next level. *wink, wink* I remember when I lost my virginity. We get it, you had sex.

They go to the trapeze place and Oswaldo is like Hopefully I dont break my neck. Thats a pretty reasonable goal.

They all are like surprisingly good at this. Even Tee, whose blackness surprisingly does not hinder her capabilities. Its a miracle.

Oswaldo and Tee are like being lovey-dovey because they fucked that one time. Hes like shes not trying to rape me and I like this side of her. I too am a big fan of the people who dont try and sexually assault me. Weird.

THE TRUTH BOOTH

Ryan comes in hot and asks about the no matches, aka Gianna and Hayden, still hooking up.

Giannas like HOW IS THIS OUR FAULT??? Uh, youre a confirmed no match and youre hooking up. I feel like Im taking crazy pills. Leave the dumb shit to Rush Boobs, please god.

The house is like, “ugh we hate you, lets just get this shit over with.” Thats how I felt with pledges in my sorority.

Tyranny and Oswaldo go to the truth booth because duh.

OSWALDO: Im excited to learn if were a match and really connect on a deeper level. TEE: Im tryna fuck.

Im stressed because Tee will def die of alcohol poisoning tonight if this doesnt work out. And what do you know, NO MATCH.

Tee was like I was falling in love with him. Shes crying. Hes crying. This is depressing. Did I accidentally sit on the remote and turn on ?

Oswaldo starts boxing while Andre is talking him down and all the guys hug him. Wow, I love the bromance. What I love more is that eventually one of them will try and fight another. #Drama

After everything, Tyler and Shannon are still hanging out. Whats Tylers favorite thing about Shannon? She isnt Taylor. Hes got high standards, ya know? #FourFuckingBeams

Taylor is like youre fucked up. And hes like why, because Im having a conversation?

Ugh Taylor, this paaaaains me to say, because I usually automatically side with the hot girl, but hes low-key right. You need to chill out and move on. Hes not worth it, dude. Hes just not.

Andre asks Taylor wtf shes doing with Tyler and Im like YAS KEEP THIS UP.

Andre is like actually, we like each other, Taylor. And shes like wait, yeah we do. WTF is this Jedi mind control shit Andre has.

ANDRE: *swinging coin back and forth* you are getting very sleepy.. and youre going to fuck me TAYLOR: *eyes glazed* yes, master

He says that she should be a Victorias Secret Model and honestly she should marry him just for that. Like thats compliment of the goddam century.

THE MATCHUP CEREMONY

Its the boys pick tonight. Please note that last time they blacked out harder than Tee does on any given weeknight.

Little Mike gets the ball rollin the wrong way and picks Kam.

Mikes like following our heart doesnt work. Hes like we should venture off, and though thats noble, maaaaaaybe not at the match ceremony. Thats like Michael Phelps being like LOOK FREESTYLE JUST DOESNT WORK right before the 4×100 relay.

Ozzy picks Hannah.

Oswaldo is up next and hes like “I GOTTA DO ME.” He picks Taylor.

Ryan asks Taylor how she feels about Tyler and shes like whos Tyler? Andre and her give each other looks and Im like OKAY YES IM HERE FOR THIS SHIT.

Ryans like Andre, do you wish you were with her and hes like Im practicing my patience. Whatever the fuck that means.

Oswaldo is like standing next to her like, lol just fuck me, right?

Andre picks Casandra.

Eddy picks Alicia and is like this is my homie.

KAM: I AM NOT WORRIED. ARE YOU WORRIED, BECAUSE I AM NOT WORRIED!!! *twitches*

Joey picks Rush boobs.

Derrick picks Gianna. Weird.

Tylers up and fucking moseys up to the front. Goddam hes like a walking Shakespeare playtragically beautiful.

Hes like Ryan, let me speak and Ryans like I didnt even say anything, but ok.

Tyler goes off about how he was painted as the villain and how he is innocent and how all this Taylor shit is fake news and the failing lamestream media is spreading false rumors!!! Sad!

Ryan asks Tyler who he likes more, Shannon or Taylor and Tyler picks Shannon.

RYAN: Do you think Tyler is your match? SHANNON: IDK RYAN: Is Taylor his match? SHANNON: IDK RYAN: Is the world round? SHANNON: IDK

Tylers talking about his breakup with Taylor and is like it sucks because you cant delete people in the real world. This is the first thing that I agree with him on. Dont worry Tyler, Ive watched . Well get to that point someday.

Michael picks KARI. Is it Carrie or KAAAAAARI? I have been saying KAAAAARI. Please DM some confirmation.

Hayden is next. Hayden tells the group that him and Gianna are affecting the game and they are going to stop screwing everyone over.

Gianna is like “WTF. WHO TOLD HIM HE COULD SPEAK? WHO LET HIM OUT OF HIS CAGE?” He picks Carolina. Hehe.

Jaylen and Tee are last. Tee is really bummed about Oswaldo and Ryan is like, “bitch its week four.”

These couples are random AF but idk Im drunk and just here to shit talk. Dont give that much of a fuck.

No blackout, so thats good. They get four beams again. Cant wait to hear them talk about it incessantly.