#the trigger in question is my family’s cult and specifically ‘funny’ experiences with them/‘owning’ them or whatever

[pinkfey]

having an uncommon trigger is literally the worst huh 😔😔😔

#i can’t exist both online and offline without seeing it #the trigger in question is my family’s cult and specifically ‘funny’ experiences with them/‘owning’ them or whatever #like of COURSE i get it!! make fun of the christians who come to your door with a bible always trying to worm their way in #i get it. believe me. #i just can’t escape it. even if there’s no joke the name of the cult itself gives me anxiety #partially because we’re taught not to ever engage with nonbelievers talking about us online #it’s a big no-no #so even though i’m not subscribed to if and haven’t been for forever that utter fear is still there #i wish i could let it go but it reduces me to a puddle of panic and trauma #and there’s no way for me to avoid it. i’ve blacklisted every tag possible on every social media site #but it all the little memes still show up. scenes in tv shows. tiktok anecdotes. it makes me wanna cry fjnsjdbfsjdjf #i even blocked an account Literally about providing resources for cult survivors bc i couldn’t bear seeing her videos abt my family’s cult #and now i’m like. Why. Girl you could’ve used that !!!!! djshdjfjdbs #it’s just the anxiety :( #anyways.txt