#this definitely isnt the platform for this BUT im actually writing/typing something that could conceivably be read by someone else

[mercurialvixen]

So I've spent the last near decade after my mom died just trying to cease to exist. My only friend is my dog and she is elderly and on her way out. I'm not particularly okay. Trying a momentum thing where I had the revelation, 'what if I just don't lay down and die'. Maybe this will help, maybe not.

#been two years since i posted and maybe this isnt the platform i need but w/e trying it out #my bio says '26' and wow #the passage of time wigs me out #also this revelation is so bizarre i had a cold and went 'what if i lived for something' and then i stopped drinking like ??? #lets fucking learn to drive and maybe get a phone and even a job and meet 1 fucking person i could conceivably speak to #seems fake but maybe this is something #this definitely isnt the platform for this BUT im actually writing/typing something that could conceivably be read by someone else #me hyping myself up for a conversation with the cashier at a grocery store #like im baby stepping here but #maybee?? #is anyone still even on this hellsite