#too occupied by the angst of kinnporsche

[surrealsunday]

Jaime, hey! I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw your profile in kinnporsche tag, like my favourite Elu ficwriter is also into KinnPorsche? What a luck! Really, it's like meeting an old good friend. Btw, Tempo and Mood Tattoo are my two warm blankets I like wrapping myself in when I'm in a certain mood. Never written it here, only on ao3, but thanks for these masterpieces. And about KinnPorsche, I see you're enjoying it a great deal, right?) Just out of curiosity - do you have a favourite character in this couple or you love Kinn and Porsche equally?) For me, f.e., Elu was the only ship where I loved both of them very much, couldn't be angry with any of them even if they did some stupid things. Eliott was the sweetest guy on the planet and Lucas was such a menace but I just adored him because how couldn't I. But Elu is an exception for me, in other ships I always had a favourite guy. In case of KinnPorsche it's definitely Kinn cause just... he's so broken, so messy, he's dealing with so much shit in his life yet he has such a big heart and loves Porsche so much that I'm just drowning in his feelings. And also Mile, oh gosh, he's sooo good, can't believe it's his first bl (mine too, btw :)). And as for Porsche, he has lots of good traits too, for sure, but for some reason I feel more empathy for Kinn than him. So, what about you and your favourites?) Again, so glad to see you in KinnPorsche fandom :) good to see a familiar face here, especially when all the angst and drama are only coming :)

This is so nice?!!! I'm so glad you messaged <333! And I akdjfakdsjf at you calling Tempo and Mood Tattoo blankets. That is such a lovely compliment. 

I also freaking love this question. It was super fun to think about - especially because Kinn and Porsche are currently occupying 98% of my brain. With couples I really love, I tend to love them both even when they are being total fuckups (kinda live for the fuckups if I'm honest because I'm an angst whore). That was definitely true for Elu. But I will also have one character who just *gets* to me a little more. Like they're *mine*. Maybe because I relate to them more, or maybe because something in their personality is a trait I adore/ recognize/ like... any of the above. In KinnPorsche that is for sure Porsche. I adore Kinn too and honestly he's a pretty perfect prototype for the fucked up, tortured characters I tend to live and breathe for. And so, I totally agree that the broken, messy, desperate way he goes about life and falling in love with Porsche is soul destroying and I love him so much for it. I also love the duality of the man. I loved episode 6 so much for this reason - getting to see unfiltered, unburdened Kinn. Like it's no wonder Porsche was totally enamored. Kinn was cute af. And I just really love how his cuter/ softer/ more vulnerable tendencies with Porsche are balanced (and sometimes opposed) to his colder, BAMF mafia self. And like you, I love how he loves Porsche. I love that Porsche is his undoing, and I love the way he delights in coming apart for him. I just really love his joy when it comes to Porsche. And I love the way Porsche brings him peace. 

Ok but I didn't mean to wax poetic about Kinn. We're supposed to be talking about my love of Porsche here lmao. So Porsche... first and foremost, he's a brat. Like a menace of the highest order. I am and always will be the biggest sucker for a character like that (at least when well developed and embodied by the right actor). It reminds me a little of when I worked with kids in after-school care, and the little boys who were the biggest pains in their teachers asses - like the biggest troublemakers alive - would always steal my heart and become my best buddies. That's likely at least part of why I see Porsche and think about tucking him in my pocket and keeping him forever (nobody tell Kinn). I love so much all his bratty tendencies and I love that he put them on full display from the get-go. One of my favourite things about him is the way he doesn't back down and never diminished himself or who he was for Kinn. Sure, at the beginning, he was new and didn't have the lay of the land. But it's months later that he's still mouthing off to Kinn left and right and I just love that for him and me (clearly Kinn 100% loved this as well). And I am most especially done for when it comes to the side of Porsche we're seeing because he's fallen in love with Kinn. Watching this cocky, bratty, confident little shit be so desperately vulnerable, so loving and achingly sweet... watching the way he wants to take care of Kinn (vs the way he's had to take care of the people in his life, all while knowing that Kinn is more than capable of taking care of himself)... it all completely kills me. So yeah... I suppose he's my fave.

But I am all for the way they both have and will continue to fuck up. I very much don't want or need my faves to be perfect. I love when things get messy and angsty and these two do it better than anyone.

And on that note... excuse to list my fave/ underrated (only because there are so many delightful bratty Porsche moments these get lost in the fray) Porsche-as-a-menace moments aka. why I (and Kinn) were completely fucked from the get-go (screencaps because I can't make gifs... rip me):

Porsche kicking Ken

Listen. This moment was the moment for me. The moment I knew I was completely done for and would absolutely love Porsche. (Side note: the look on Kinn's face adkjfadsjkf... he was just as amused).

Are you a God?

This is a little less brat than it is just being a mouthy little fucker but I love. I love that Porsche wasn't ever afraid to challenge Kinn. I love that from the start he was established as a polar opposite to someone like Big (aka. Kinn worshipper). And I love that challenging Kinn is something he continues to do (and something Kinn really needed in a partner imo). Side note: Big's offended face in the background lmaoooo.

Stand up

This whole scene really. This is a 'Porsche's nature is to make Kinn's life difficult' kind of scene and the interaction between them is so normal at this point that I think how different it is gets lost. Like Kinn walking in and telling Porsche to stand. I keep comparing that in my mind to the way the other bodyguards leap to their feet during the awkward post-spa lunch. And then when Kinn tells Porsche to take his shirt off Porsche just outright refuses. Like, yeah, he gives in (while looking annoyed and confused the whole time). But that initial 'no'? Like anyone else would dare say that to Kinn...

Bonus: Spitting fruit all over Kinn

Let's be real... all of episode 6 is Porsche being the most hilarious, adorable brat in the world. None of it is underrated but I had to include this moment because it cracked me up so much and I just really wanting to include one brat moment where the two of them were in their little bubble. The fact that Porsche really waits for Kinn to genuinely panic and stick his fingers into Porsche's mouth?? All so Porsche can laugh and spit all over him? Shut up I love so much. And Kinn's 'I hope you choke on it'? Listen. I'm snorting just typing that. I love them.

Ok this got hella long. It's my nature but I should really stop. Keep chatting with me though! Especially when the serious drama hits. We will need to discuss.

#kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series #this is really your fault for giving me a reason to ramble #we're blaming you for this essay #I'm good with it tho because this was fun