#uni and this girl said he'll take us out for drinks on last day of course so yayyyyyyy

[enigmasandepiphanies]

I think some of y'all (people in uni) were never 15 and read, "we accept the love we think we deserve" and sobbed while reading perks of being a wallflower and it shows

#gift giving is not a competition to some of us bestie #love is not conditional #dont make me overwhelmed by making our mutual friends bday a fucking competition #thank god her best friend also agrees and we are both her best friends so we know #but just why are people so #like this insecurity with love is so insane #people who want to see your love will see your love at the end of the day and if they don't keep being the lighthouse around please #anyway in other good news spoke to the cool batchmate i always wanted to talk more with and she was also like bro i love having convos with #you lets hangout and so we ate dinner walked and talked about history partition cultural stories my ex friend's bisexuality crisis which was #so similar to hers also takked about my cultural crisis family stories her firefly house urdu poetry her boyfriend my career pospects #so yayy i guess but so tired presentation was good prof questioned a lot cause he literally knows my source text authors its his friend in #uni and this girl said he'll take us out for drinks on last day of course so yayyyyyyy #my roomie and her bf constantly talk eh that is but i am gonna shower play my playlist till i sleep #today has been something but atleast i will have dinner with a new person tomorrow as well so yayyyy #life is just being very overwhelmed lately and i just hope people i love know that i love them and i am missing them even though #they live a floor above from me or live miles away too actually #eni life stories

[vettely]

i never had anything with this one guy but i know he liked me at one point and i liked him too and i still do even though the last time i saw him before today was more than a year ago and i hate that there was never anything between us except for a high amount of unresolved sexual and romantic tension but it was always somehow the wrong time and place and first he had a girlfriend and a then i had a boyfriend and then i was acting all distant and then the pandemic happened and then uni happened and then my mom dying happened and then me dropping out of uni happened and then his new girlfriend happened and it was ALWAYS JUST THE WRONG TIME and it's kinda stupid kinda ridiculous kinda funny kinda sad we only ever hugged three times in five years of knowing eachother but all of those times were emotional and weird but nice and intimate like the first time was when i was drunk and crying the second time was at my mom's funeral and the third time was today at his dad's funeral and i honestly didn't even want to hug him bc it really hit me that i'll never be over him even though i never even had him and i know his girlfriend is not the biggest fan of me but i knew he needed that hug and he leaned in first and i just kinda held him and i felt so bad for him and my heart was breaking for him and i hate myself bc i couldn't stop thinking how he'll never be mine and i'll never even kiss him and probably never even see him again after today like what the fuck why was i even thinking about that kind of stuff at his dad's funeral i'm so stupid i hate him and i hate myself and his girlfriend is so nice and i do believe they are soulmates they were inseparable since the first year at uni and it was obvious she was so into him and he only saw her as a best friend and i know she was jealous of me at few occasions and i hated myself for it bc i didn't want to see her sad but at those times when she was jealous i was actually so happy especially that one time at uni when we spent 6 hours in the corner of the classroom just talking instead of doing our projects and at the end of the day he asked me to go for a drink with him but i couldn't bc i had to stay behind and talk to my professor about my project and i knowwww if i had said yes something would've changed between us but i didn't and i regret that every single day and i wish that was the only time he had asked me out but it actually wasn't bc he asked me few more times in some weird ways and i was acting like i didn't know what he was talking about oh my god why was i like thatttttt and when he broke up with his first girlfriend he wanted me to find out subtly but he was anything but subtle about it and it was so ???? but also cute af bc it was obvious that he wanted me to know that he is free for taking and let's not forget a little bit over a year ago when he pressed every single button in thr elevator bc he wanted to spend more time talking to me about irrelevant things and tbh that was peak romance but dear god GIRL YOU NEED TO GET OVER HIM you probably won't ever even see him after today bc you dropped out of uni and left him behind and he has a girlfriend and it's over ffs

#what is wrong with me #lmao ignore this #i'm slowly going insane