#vent post one million and one.......... im fine guys i just like to fantasise that someone i care about reads these and thinks yikes!

[toastsnaffler]

every morning I'm like wow.. birdsong and sunshine.....hm.. u know what. maybe there is hope in the world. and everything will be ok :3 and every evening I'm like I Hope A Meteorite Crashes Through My Window While I Sleep Hitting Me On The Head And Killing Me Instantly. and I switch between these multiple times throughout the day and alsosometimes they happen the other way round and theres no sense or reason or order or pattern just the labyrinth forever. yeah I'm good why do u ask

#girls will play videogames to chill out and then 10 minutes later will be hysterically crying in the bathroom brushing their teeth #i dont know whats wrong with me anymore i give up trying to figure it out. thats a lie i wish i could give up but my brain will never- #exit the ouroboros spiral of trying to figure it out bc SOMEone broke the switch for reptile brain pattern seeking activation #i dont even know how i feel right now im either fine or im going to start sobbing again #does anyone know when this ends its not fun anymore and i need to go to sleep :-( #vent post one million and one.......... im fine guys i just like to fantasise that someone i care about reads these and thinks yikes! #and doesnt even acknowledge it irl or do anything except put on performative sympathy when talking abt me to other ppl #bc theres nothing anyone can do and at its not their problem and thats ok i dont begrudge them for it ill keep ventposting forever anyway #but at least maybe a real person HAS read it. so how i feel does actually exist in a witnessable form somewhere. anyway goodnight #dont send me asks this is a VENT POST sorry and thank you okay bye #.vent