#what can I say Hayden’s really good at playing hot unstable men

[go-see-a-starwar]

Today’s installment of “I watch Hayden Christensen’s filmography and tell you how pretty he is in it” is The Last Man (2019)

Hayden plays Kurt Matheson, a veteran suffering from severe PTSD and hallucinations. Increasing gang violence, climate disasters and the sermons of a doomsday street prophet lead Kurt to start preparing for the end of days. He takes a job to pay for his homemade fortress but his mobster boss and the boss’ beautiful daughter threatens to derail Kurt’s survival plans.

How pretty is he in it? When Hayden first appears on screen, his Santa beard and old prospector long johns are a near jumpscare. But once he loses those a half-hour in, he’s about as hot as he’s ever looked.

Welcome to the gun show indeed.

Does he get drenched at some point?: No proper drenching but he does get good and sweaty (and shirtless) a couple times. 2 💦 out of 5

How’s the movie itself? Pretty bad! There’s approximately four half-baked plots at once with no effort to make them cohesive and dialogue & line delivery that makes the Prequels seem Oscar-worthy in comparison. Hayden is just about the only bright spot, he plays unstable characters really well and if I could pluck his character Kurt out of this movie and into a better one I absolutely would. I’ll give this movie some credit for *looking* way better than it had any right to, and Kurt and his love interest Jessica are cute (and their love scene is spicy and definitely the best scene in the movie)

Is the RottenTomatoes rating unfairly low: It’s currently sitting on a big fat 0 but there’s only 5 reviews. The audience score of 24% feels way too high though, I’d say this deserves a 10-15% rating.

In short: The concept is interesting and Hayden along with Harvey Keitel do the most they can with what they get, but they’re not given much. I cannot in good conscience recommend anyone watch this movie but if you must, only do it if you’re in the middle of a Hayden hyperfixation. Otherwise, just go to the love scene about halfway through and after that stick to the gifs.

#a terrible movie I have unfortunately voluntarily watched multiple times #what can I say Hayden’s really good at playing hot unstable men #also the ending is sweet and against all good sense and logic made me want more #hayden christensen #Kurt matheson #the last man #the last man (2019) #12 days of Christensenmas #gsasw reviews hayden movies #not sw