#which is bad bc it makes everything else spiral. ex. need to save -> buying less groceries/policing what i eat -> ed relapse

[chitaquagirl]

feeling dire

#definitely mostly pms but also other things . SCARED!!! #lots of stuff happening to create Perfect circumstances for me to have a very bad time #and generally. i am FAR more prone to depression than anxiety but atm i am a ball of nerves #meds on back order. Scary!!! makes me feel like i need to ration my current supply (i rly don’t) #SCHOOL. RLY SCARY. didn’t go to class today. So many assignedments to work on and they just keep piling up!! #need to meet w my prof abt research. SCARY!! bc i have been slacking like crazy 🫠 #and the biggest anxiety inducer. Money!!! which is DUMB!!!! bc objectively i don’t need to worry!!!!!!! #but unexpected thangs are in motion so i am having to pay > $700 more than anticipated a month #which again. this is manageable. Not ideal but given my jobs i can handle it #i just wasn’t expecting it and now feel very out of sorts #since i was a little kid ive had this weird truly unreasonable and irrational anxiety abt money #and this is unfortunately triggering a lot of that again #which is bad bc it makes everything else spiral. ex. need to save -> buying less groceries/policing what i eat -> ed relapse #just feeling very very stupid and upset 🥴 #pers