#your fic/headcanons/meta annoys me? you're not doing it right

[cairoscene]

Brian David Gilbert on Sad Boyz

feels fandom relevant.

[ID: A series of screen captures of Brian David Gilbert speaking on a podcast: "The thing that you invest your time in can feel so important to your identity that occasionally you feel, like, you need to close it off from other people in order to keep it safe. And I think that's where a lot of nerd culture, all that gatekeeping stuff, all of the toxicity stems from that thing where it's like, "In high school I didn't have a lot of friends or connect with a lot of people, but I did have this comic book, and now this comic book is super popular, but these people don't like me. That must be because they're not real fans."" End ID]

#feels very appropriate recently #oh you didn't read those comics? or these ones? or any? you're not doing it right #oh you're not including my favorite character? you're not doing it right #your fic/headcanons/meta annoys me? you're not doing it right #like come on these comics are 80 years old #obviously fanon vs canon is a battle that exists in almost every fandom but it's been esp prevalent in this fandom i've noticed #let's be real guys the comics are sometimes really bad and sometimes fanon is really good #anyway i watched this and it felt applicable #so that's my two cents #gatekeeping #fandom #etc

[apoptoses]

You mentioned making vc friends and I was wondering if you had on advice on going about it or how you did it? I would love to make some friends in this fandom but I get worried interacting with people that I’m being pushy or annoying

HEY so this is by no means a perfect guide to online friend making but here's my thoughts:

Create the content you wanna see and let people come to you. Post your headcanons, your meta thoughts, your 3 am feelings about your blorbo and tag them. Like-minded fans will eventually find you and follow you and then you'll have some mutuals, and that makes it a lot less awkward to interact!

Comment on your favorite creator's works. You don't have to write a book report but if your comment lets them know 'hey, you wrote X and i see this character in the same way!' they'll likely comment back and you'll have a conversation. And if you converse enough eventually they might do what I did to others and DM you about a wip and boom! Friends!!

Comment on people's posts and send them asks about interests you have in common off anon. Like I really liked @hekateinhell's armand/daniel fics and she's all about armand/lestat, and I figured well...if we both like armand this much then she can probably convert me to armand/lestat. So I just asked her off anon what there is to like about them, and then we started dm'ing about them because I was convinced. And then we were friends!!

Understand that sometimes people are busy and can't respond every time. The only time someone comes off 'pushy' imo is if they comment on 100% of someone's posts and then start sending 'sorry for annoying you' messages if they don't respond to every comment. I feel like this should be common sense but I've seen people get really upset if their favorite user doesn't respond 100% of the time that is what's pushy.

If you wanna write fic or make art, do it! Put yourself out there, participate in some events like the upcoming kinktober. You don't have to post on ao3 or whatever right away, you can just write something short and post it direct to tumblr or put your art right here. It's nerve wracking at first but I swear there's no better way to meet people! And everyone has to start somewhere so don't worry about quality, just make something and your passion for it will attract people.

Other than that I feel like all there is to it is to be yourself, put your thoughts/creative works out there and you'll attract similar people.

And like with anything online, be wary. There's bad apples in every group but don't let them spoil your good time. If I let the first shitty response to a post run me out of fandom I wouldn't have made it a month on here lol And if someone gives you shit then either they're a jerk and you don't want to be friends with them anyways, or they're really miscommunicating and need to figure that out themselves. Either way you're within your rights to block them or delete their response or just ignore it and move on.

So!! Be friendly!! Be creative!! Have fun and friends will follow!!

#apoptoses answers