thin-ren

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july 2019 vs. september 2019 vs. march 2020

took me literal months but i'm happy that you can see a small difference

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attn to all you youngins who have never purged before 🗣

there is nothing cute about it lmao

hunching over your toilet- fingering your throat like a straight man trying to hook the g spot

puke all over your hands, spit running down your arms. that doesn’t matter tho cause your dignity is gone, so you’ll shove them chunk covered fingers back in your mouth np

so. much. snot.

so much.

your throat is on fire, your entire body aching. don’t even get me started on the stomach pain.

u deserve better than any of this.

honestly, so do I

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ana survival kit

1. gum -–> prevents hunger and tricks your body into thinking it’s getting food. also, a blast of flavor that you can get for a few calories instead of a few hundred. get 0 cal if you can!

2. water —> literally one of the most important things you can have in your journey with ana. DRINK. WATER. it will seriously help you.

3. diet soda —> when you need carbonated flavor, drink diet soda, NOT regular soda. do not drink your cals.

4. fitbit or other tracking device —> things like fitbits allow you to track your food, water, and exercise. really useful for logging!

5. laxatives —> to clean out your system! (PSA: I DO NOT RECOMMEND THE USE OF LAXATIVES WITHOUT KNOWING THE RISKS OF LAX ABUSE.)

6. multivitamins —> since you’re eating very little, you need to make sure you get the proper amount of nutrients in your system to stay as healthy as you can.

7. green tea —> boosts your metabolism hella and prevents hunger when drunk hot.

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i never post before and after pictures because I haven’t lost enough for them but here’s one of them. i dont really see a difference but this is a 30lbs difference - ive lost nearly 20lbs since the after picture but I’ve only got the courage to post it now lol.

(220lbs to 190lbs)

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so how do i stop gaining weight this isn’t funny anymore

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Mum: what did you eat for lunch today?

Me: I...I..em...I ate... I had... I had toast and jam... it was really good!

Mum:there’s no bread in the house.

Me: fuck.

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stomach: *aggressively growls* i’M HuNGrY

me: okay, sure thing, buddy. *binges and purges*

stomach: 

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if i dont have a uterus... im guaranteed to not get pregnant OR periods ever again... but also... my stomach will be flatter... literally where are the downsides

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my life in a nutshell.

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god i found some pictures of me when i was like 11 and im so thin in them. why cant i keep weight off like i did then

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Tru

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[thin-ren]

Hey, whatever drove you to your eating disorder, I just wanted to say I’m sorry.

Weather it was a fatphobic comment overheard during class, or bullying, or a “health” obsessed parent, or a society saturated in diet culture, or trauma, or anything else; I’m sorry.

You were wronged. You may never hear it from the people or things that influenced it, so hear it from me.

You deserve better.

I’m sorry.

[thin-ren]

Relatable

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ive been at 245 for a WHILE and i checked today and im at like 239. hate my life

224lbs please end my existence

[thin-ren]

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Me: h-

My body dysmorphia: u look like this