waywardcryptid

[waywardcryptid]

I love how we've lost the plot so thoroughly on what "pov" means as far as a TikTok/reel/whatever and now it's functionally the same as rod serling saying "imagine if you will"

[waywardcryptid]

#oh no!!!! #can't believe we lost another legend

[waywardcryptid]

[waywardcryptid]

[waywardcryptid]

#someone invent time travel so we can shinzo abe that motherfucker already

[waywardcryptid]

i’m obsessed with the mum from ponyo. driving single lane on a cliff edge? drift those turns in your nissan cube. husband has to work an extra shift? tell him to fuck off in morse code. pet fish turned into a child on your driveway? adopt her. town drowned in a tsunami? leave your 5 year old in charge, he’s the man of the house now

[waywardcryptid]

It's end of May, yall know what that means

[waywardcryptid]

while they share a similar base flavor, dick tastes more umami while pussy tastes more acidic, though recent menstruation conveys an overwhelming metallic flavor that some diners object to (though i am not one of them). recommended wine pairings are

[waywardcryptid]

no offense but if i exit out of a program that program should close. none of that running in the background shit.

[waywardcryptid]

[waywardcryptid]

#w h e n

[waywardcryptid]

What's the punishment for breaking the laws of physics?

10-15 years in prism.

[waywardcryptid]

3…2…1… HAPPY SODOMY!!!!

[waywardcryptid]

No, no, that's my hyperfixation in-law twice removed on my mutuals side.

[waywardcryptid]

no cops at pride just jadzia dax and her bat'leth

[waywardcryptid]

struggling to comprehend the scale of the mistake I almost just made

[waywardcryptid]