weloveanidala

[weloveanidala]

My evening tribute to Hayden and Natalie who used their talent to bring life to two main characters of the saga, letting us enjoy their amazing chemistry as Anidala.

They, at the time, had to face very harsh criticism. It was "IN" to vomit on the prequels, and Hayden and Natalie, two young actors who were kind of starting, were the ideal targets.

Thus, critics and fans of the original trilogy spat on them, confident of being holders of the objective truth. Aren't we, as humans, conforted when we think the same as the majority, free to bully ?

I was even surprised to read, as far as yesterday, an article from I don't know which website that ranked their chemistry among the worst in cinema.

[It also reminds me of a journalist from the Times who wrote, not so long ago, that now "we should forgive Hayden Christensen", when I believe it should be those who fought in a pack against him who should apologise for the hate they spewed on a man who, deep down, had done nothing wrong, and, this, while that hate has aged very badly. It's not because you work for the Times that everything you write is necessarily valid, and there, for once, the article not only validates the bullying - how ugly -, but doesn't manage to catch the thread of history.]

What's even more interesting is that, I listened to a podcast with Ewan and Ethan Hawke for Raymond and Ray's PR, and Ewan was saying how much he hated when critics judged which pair has chemistry and which doesn't, because all that thing was a way to put actors down.

~

I'm confident to say these people were wrong.

Hayden and Natalie made a whole generation dream, and this generation is there today to tell how much their version of Anakin and Padme means to them.

They have inspired millions of people, and as such, deserve all the love.

[weloveanidala]

““Did we do the right thing? Not in loving each other - we couldn’t help that - but in marrying? I’ve put a wedge between you and the Jedi.” “No you haven’t.” “But your first loyalty is to me,” Padmé said. “That makes your path confused. I know enough about the Jedi to know how wrong that is.” “It is they who are wrong.” Anakin insisted. “I am strong enough to do both, and they can’t see it.””

—

Secrets of the Jedi by Jude Watson

Oh yes, absolutely…

[weloveanidala]

“Leia could not bear to look longer. As horrified as she was by what Shmi had suffered-as much as it pained her to contemplate what had happened there- she was even more appalled by the ghastly cycle her father had set in motion. There had to be a hundred skulls in that pile, maybe two or three hundred. For his mother’s life, Anakin had taken the lives of dozens of Tuskens; the Sand People had responded with more killing of their own. The legacy of death he had planted that day had continued to grow, costing hundreds of beings their lives, and Leia could see no end to it. “He should have known better.” Leia passed the electrobinoculars to Han. “He was a Jedi.” “He was a kid with a dead mother.” Han raised the electro-binoculars, but he seemed to be looking more toward the banthas than the bones. “He vented his anger on the ones who killed her. I might have done the same thing.” “That doesn’t make it right,” Leia said. “And it doesn’t make me a Sith monster, either,” Han retorted. “What he did wasn’t evil, it was human. Later, he became Darth Vader and did a lot of terrible things, but don’t forget that he’s the one who killed the Emperor.” “You’re saying you forgive him?” Leia asked. “After he froze you in carbonite?” “I’m just saying that without him, Palpatine would still be Emperor.” “You’re saying Darth Vader saved the galaxy?” Han shrugged. “Well, Anakin Skywalker. Think about it. If he’d have been a nice guy, do you think he’d have ever gotten that close to Palpatine?” Han continued to watch the banthas through the electrobinoculars. “Maybe that was your father’s destiny all along, to save the galaxy just like his mother thought he would - well, maybe not just like she thought. But he did save it.””

— Tatooine Ghost (via thewearyprincess)

[weloveanidala]

“[Anakin] needed to talk to Padme directly. Palpatine couldn’t order her not to go. But Anakin could. Padme’s laughter bubbled, then died when she saw he was serious.“You’re ordering me?” “Yes. I have a right. I have more experience than you do; I’m a Jedi and I know what we could be in for. I’m also an officer in the Republic army.” “But I’m not.” Padme continued to fold a robe she was placing in a small bag at her feet. “So thanks but no thanks, Commander.” “It’s dangerous and unnecessary for you to go, and I won’t allow it.” Padme turned. Her gaze was direct. Cool and composed. That always infuriated him. “I think you know well enough how your attitude angers and upsets me. I don’t respond to orders. I am a Senator. I have a duty to perform. So I am going.” “Padme, please.” He wanted to give in to her softness, but she stood before him, ramrod straight. She wasn’t wearing her ceremonial robes, only a soft sheath down to her ankles, but she might as well be costumed in armor. He collapsed on his back on the sleep couch. “I don’t know why it’s so hard to talk to you.” “That’s because you’re not talking to me. You’re ordering me.” “I’m just trying to keep you safe.” “This is not the way to do it.” He looked up. She was smiling at him. She came and sat beside him. “I know you worry about my safety,” she said in the soft tone he loved. “I worry about yours. We live in perilous times, Anakin. We’re in the middle of a war. I’m in danger no matter where I am. We’ve both been in some kind of danger since the moment you arrived to protect me.” “Agreed. But do you have to volunteer for it?” She took his hand and laced her fingers through his. “I offered to go because I knew I would be safe. I knew the best Jedi in the Order would be there to protect me.” He groaned. “Now don’t start flattering me.” She grinned at him. “I meant Obi-Wan.” He tossed a pillow at her, and she shrieked in surprise. She threw it back, and he held it suspended in the air with the Force. “Are you still trying that same trick on me?” “It’s worked in the past.” She lay down beside him. They faced each other, almost nose to nose. “I’ll be careful,” she said. “I won’t leave your side,” he said. “Don’t,” she said, drawing him close. “I don’t want you to.” [Jude Watson. Secrets of the Jedi]

[weloveanidala]

“I’d overheard someone say that Anakin was Padmé’s bodyguard, and I don’t think I thought there was anything strange about that. Padmé was often accompanied by a security officer named … Oh, my, what was his name? Ty? No, Captain Typho!

Anyway, I just imagined that Anakin was Padmé’s boyfriend. I thought they both looked so beautiful together.

Well, Ryoo and I were just heartbroken when we learned that they weren’t staying at the house. They left just a few hours later for the Lake Country. I recall our mother saying something about Padmé needing to get away from the city and rest for a few days. We cried because we wanted the droid to stay and play with us!

A few days later, I remember there was some concern in our house about no one knowing where Padmé was. She and Anakin had been staying at a retreat in the Lake Country, but then they’d left without telling anyone where they were going. My mother was a bit frantic until a few days later, when she received word that Padmé was alive and well. It wasn’t long after that that Padmé returned to Naboo with Anakin, and that was the second time I met him. I remember that encounter more clearly because ofthe way I reacted when I saw that his right hand had been replaced with a prosthetic. The fingertips were made of a gold-colored metal, and I thought it looked cold. And there were exposed wires. I guess it may have been just a temporary prosthetic.

When my family and I greeted him and Padmé, I couldn’t stop myself from staring at his new hand. And then I looked up into his eyes.He looked … well, I thought he looked angry, and I just started crying. Maybe he was angry, but in hindsight, I’m certain it had nothing to with me. My mother apologized for my behavior, but Anakin said there was no reason for anyone to be sorry.

He knelt down beside me, held out his left hand to me, and asked me if I’d put my hand in his. I did. He smiled and gave my fingers a gentle squeeze, then said “That’s for good luck, so we’ll all hang on to our fingers from now on.” I’m sure he just wanted to make me feel better, and he did. But I still felt so awful for him for losing a hand.

And then, three years later, Padmé was dead. It was awful. She was so young. And no one in our family seemed to know how she had died, or at least no one told us. My sister and I did learn that there had been assassination attempts, and that was why Anakin had been acting as her bodyguard.

At her funeral, I didn’t just weep for her. I thought Anakin was dead, too. We’d heard that the Jedi had attempted to overthrow the Republic, and that most of the Jedi had been killed.

To Ryoo and me, Anakin was our hero. We couldn’t imagine him doing anything wrongI had all sorts of fantasies about how he might have been killed or injured while trying to save Padmé, or that he’d gone into hiding because he refused to participate in the so-called Jedi takeover. Silly dreams.

But all that was… How long ago? About fifty-five years, I think. And now, my dear friend Leia Organa Solo tells me about her discovery that Padmé was her mother, and of what became of Anakin.

My head is still reeling. I’ve known Leia ever since we both served in the Imperial Senate, and to think that neither of us ever had the slightest inkling that we were first cousins.If Leia hadn’t told me herself, I don’t think I ever would have believed that Anakin Skywalker became Darth Vader. It’s just so… so entirely inconceivable that that lovely young man could have become Vader. And yet that’s exactly what happened, isn’t it? To think I held his hand. His good hand. Oh, my.”

Pooja Naberrie in Ryder’s Windham’s Jedi vs. Sith: The Essential Guide to the Force  (Part I)

[weloveanidala]

This work is a screenshot redraw from a 1974 movie called “The Deluge”(Potop), the movie is an adaptation of “The Deluge”(Potop) novel by Henryk Sienkiewicz.

Why I drew that is under the cut/read more, if you’re interested…

Keep reading

[weloveanidala]

I still can’t believe we got not just an entire movie trilogy about why attachment is bad, but then we also got an entire TV series about why attachment is bad. The prequel trilogy is the story of how Anakin turned to the dark side because he was so afraid to live without Padme that he was willing to make a deal with the devil, that his greed to possess her, to keep her at any cost, made him murder literal children and help burn down the galaxy.  This is what attachment is. In the end, Anakin still can’t let go of his attachment to Obi-Wan, even when Sidious yanks on his leash and points out how his unwillingness to move on is weakening him.  Anakin gets his ass handed to him every single time (except once) by someone who is working to rise above their attachments, their fears, their need to hold on. The Obi-Wan Kenobi series is the story of how Obi-Wan fell into such deep grief and loss that he couldn’t let go of his feelings, he was destroying himself every single day because he couldn’t move on from what had happened with Anakin, his guilt, his sorrow, his pain.  He couldn’t stop seeing Anakin everywhere, in Luke, in the clone he runs into on Daiyu, when another Jedi asks him for help.  This is what attachment is. In the end, Obi-Wan lets go of his attachment to Anakin, and we see that he regains so much of what Anakin lost.  There’s joy and love and hope to be found on this path. Obi-Wan has found his heart again, his life again, his light and faith again.  We know he will become a Force Ghost because he has risen above all of this, that he will be able to offer kindness to even his greatest enemy, when Maul finds him in the desert. They are narrative foils for each other, they both didn’t just love someone, but they held on even when it was killing them to do so, because they couldn’t let go of someone they so badly wanted to keep.  And Star Wars is a story about letting go, so that when you do, that person will come back to you–just as, when Anakin Skywalker finally lets go in Return of the Jedi, when he turns to compassion instead of attachment, he regains himself, he regains love and light and connection, he regains Luke and he regains Obi-Wan and he regains the Jedi. They are narrative mirrors of each other and their stories are at the heart of everything that makes up the prequels’ Star Wars.

[weloveanidala]

[Part 1/2] I read your posts about the "toxic" aspect of anidala, and I'm curious to know your opinion about Padmé. Everyone says that Anakin's love is possessive/obsessive, and of course it IS, but many people ignore how Padmé herself was feeling. Personally, I think there's a tendency to forget Padmé's romantic/impetuous nature to paint her as the wise Senator who only thinks about democracy/greater good, when she's actually... the Juliet to Anakin's Romeo, if it makes sense?

[Part 2/2] She enjoyed all the drama/over-the-top romance, and she let herself get carried away by Anakin’s strong emotions. Fanon!Padmé seems to care more about democracy than her husband, when it’s not true; takes two to tango. I remember Obi-Wan in AotC saying to Anakin that if their roles were reversed she would do her duty over her feelings, but in CW’s episode Shadow Warrior she traded General Grievous for Anakin. Catherine Taber said that her heart wins over her head when he’s involved. 

I absolutely agree with you on this!  I think Padme’s romantic nature tends to get overshadowed by Anakin’s super obsessive tendencies because he’s so very much more intense about it, as well as he’s a main character, but hers are absolutely there, too.She starts Attack of the Clones as having strong, clear boundaries with Anakin’s feelings for her, she tells him not to look at her like that, she’s the one holding the line about how being in a secret relationship would destroy them, but it’s also increasingly clear that she’s holding herself to that line because she says it later on Geonosis–”I’m not afraid to die. I’ve been dying a little bit each day since you came back into my life.”This is the same day where she ignores his murder of the indigenous children of Tatooine–despite that she is a Senator of the Galactic Republic!  She’s not someone who doesn’t understand the weight of those actions!–because she aches for him and is falling in love with him.  Because she’s swept up in the hurricane of his feelings for her and her own storm of feelings inside herself for him.Then she marries him after he came back into her life for what, like, three days?  A week at most?  Even knowing that it could derail her career as a Senator (to marry one of the Jedi, who are under the jurisdiction of the Senate, to cause a scandal that would force her to step down, whatever the complications are), even knowing this could destroy them, she still marries someone she barely knows because she is such a romantic for him.Even in the The Clone Wars scene I talked about how their love was good but also bad, she’s clearly shown to be swept up in the romance of it all with Anakin–she’s trying to get work done, he’s saying, “Aren’t I more important than work?  Than your ideals?” and she tries to object, but Anakin makes a romantic gesture (one that’s sweet and, were it only to have stayed at that point, could have remained sweet, only we the audience can see the deeper implications of how terrible it is because Anakin literally means it that “nothing is more important than the way [he] feels about [her]”.

This conversation ends with them kissing, with Padme setting aside her work because she’s just so into this whole romantic thing with Anakin.  She tries to protest, she says maybe he should go, but as soon as he leans in to kiss her, she’s kissing him back.

They’re interrupted, so who knows how much she would have put the breaks on this or flung herself into it, because she’s not as far down the line on this as Anakin is, but she absolutely feels it.She does put the breaks on their relationship after the events with Clovis, that she doesn’t feel happy or right in this marriage anymore, but by the time of Revenge of the Sith, she’s still with him and still coming back to how huge these romantic feelings are inside of her–a huge part of what causes her to give up on life is Anakin, how devastated she is by him no longer being the man she married.She also spends much of the time thinking about their future (while it’s unclear how much she notices that he never participates in those conversations, he always shuts it down or doesn’t respond or changes the subject), how she wants to have the baby on Naboo, how she seems to intend to leave the Senate.Later, she also ignores that he murdered the Jedi Younglings, she ignores that he helped burn down the Republic she cared so much about, that he’s saying he’s building a new Empire, and asks him, “Come away with me. Help me raise our child. Leave everything else behind while we still can.”  She ignores what he’s done to other children and says, please, come help raise our child.

Padme may well have eventually had to face these choices in herself, in a way Anakin was never going to face them without external pressure to do so, I don’t think she was as willing to do the things Anakin did for his obsessive, possessive love, but she absolutely was a romantic and she absolutely set aside things that should have been really important, because her heart won out a lot of the time.Padme cares deeply about other things, she genuinely cares about democracy and the democratic process, there are moments where she still works to hold herself to her ideals, her beliefs, because she knows they’re important.But when it really comes down to it, when it’s a real choice between Anakin and her beliefs or her sworn duty, there’s a very clear pattern of her choosing her feelings for him, choosing him over anything else.  She’s not going to kill a bunch of children for him, but she’ll ignore it when he does it.This isn’t just Anakin’s obsession for her, it’s Padme’s own feelings for him that she can’t control very well, too.  You’re absolutely right that it took two to tango here and both of them did some really bad things because of those feelings.  And none of this negates that there were good moments, that they genuinely cared about each other, and that they could be incredibly sweet to each other, this isn’t an attempt to say there was nothing good here!  They could be adorable and teasing to each other in a light-hearted way and they both clearly really dug the idea of an epic romance.  I love Anidala for both the toxic parts of their relationship and the good parts of their relationship!But when talking about the things they’re willing to set aside for that romance–or actively do for those feelings they have in their heart–Padme is someone who very much is dancing this dance, too.It’s easy to see how much she cares about her role as a Senator, that some of her most epic moments are when she’s giving a political speech or staring in horror at the political shitshow going on around her, because that is an important part of her.  And, in smaller ways, she’s able to set her feelings for Anakin aside when she wants to get some work done.  It’s not until he pushes the romance button extra hard or when she has to make a choice between the two, that we see Padme’s feelings for him will win out over the duty she swore to do and the beliefs she expresses.

[weloveanidala]

I LOVED THIS MOMENT SO MUCH. I love it because of course Obi-Wan knows about Anakin and Padme and he’s not being subtle that he knows, that it’s something that’s been woven into the story since Revenge of the Sith.

Anakin can sense Obi-Wan’s presence (because they’re so close, which is how the Force works, the closer you are to someone, the more you can pick up on their presence, which I think is part of what’s driving Anakin here, that it’s not just the visions he’s having of Obi-Wan being there for Padme’s pregnancy, but that he’s hurt and angry because he also feels betrayed that Obi-Wan is seeking someone else out, someone that’s not him) and Padme points out:  He came by because of you. It’s swept aside quickly because Anakin confesses that he feels lost, that nobody trusts him (again, he wants Obi-Wan’s trust, even when he’s been lying to Obi-Wan for ages, even when it’s Anakin who always turns away from the conversations Obi-Wan tries to have with him), and Padme points out that they trust him with their very lives. But if you step back to look at this–why would Obi-Wan go to Padme to talk about Anakin, unless he knows that Anakin would go to her for someone to talk to and confide in? Yeah, the original script had the conversation between Obi-Wan and Padme in it, where he revealed to her that he knew about them, but even without it, that’s still in the script.  Even as early as when they crash landed half of the Invisible Hand on Coruscant, Obi-Wan was telling Anakin to go off and have his “glorious day with the politicians” because he knew. And still yet more clearly, Obi-Wan knows.  Not just that Anakin cares deeply about his friend, but that it’s put into the context of romantic feelings:

So, yeah, Obi-Wan knows how Anakin feels about Padme.  He knows the context. But that’s what makes the tie back to “The Rise of Clovis” or Attack of the Clones or even Revenge of the Sith, that it’s not that they have feelings that’s the problem, it’s exactly what’s highlighted in this episode with Anakin and Rex:

Anakin–THE SHEER IRONY OF ANAKIN SKYWALKER DELIVERING THIS SPEECH IS BEAUTIFUL AND SO POINTED–tells Rex that he has to prepare himself for the possibility that Echo is dead and this is all just a trick. Ultimately, Rex knows that, if he’s wrong, then he’ll face that.  But right now, he believes in his friend. This is such an incredibly pointed parallel and contrast to Revenge of the Sith where the problem wasn’t that Anakin had feelings for Padme or that he wanted to save her, but that he let his fears override him because he couldn’t face the possibility that she might die and there was nothing he could do about it, he couldn’t face it at all. And it was a trick by an evil agent out to get him, deliberately designed to draw Anakin over to the dark side! This is why it makes perfect sense that Obi-Wan knows, not just because it’s been laid out already in previous movies and episodes, but because Obi-Wan knows Anakin isn’t getting a grip on himself.  Oh, he believes that Anakin will, that’s Obi-Wan’s biggest blind spot, he cannot see the possibility of Anakin’s failure, because he believes so strongly in Anakin, he loves him so much and thinks the world of him, but that doesn’t mean he’s not aware that Anakin has a deep rage just by Obi-Wan saying Clovis’ name, it doesn’t mean he’s not aware that Anakin is still sneaking around to holo Padme, it doesn’t mean that he’s not going to keep trying to talk to Anakin and help him. Yet, by continuing to hide it and refusing to face his deeper feelings, his fears and his growing attachment (as the Jedi use it, the definition where he cannot let her go when it’s time, that he’ll turn obsessive and possessive over her, he’ll prioritize his feelings for her over everything else to such an extent that he’ll literally murder children for it), Anakin is falling away from what he knows is right. Anakin knows that it’s the right thing to do to prepare yourself for the possibility that you’ll lose someone.  He has that wisdom and he’s imparted it on to Rex, someone he cares about very much, and wants to do right by.  Anakin had the training and wisdom to make better choices in ROTS, we see that right here, that he knows you can work to save people, believe in them, but understand that sometimes you can do everything right, you can do everything you can think of, and still lose.  He can even hear Obi-Wan say that he understands the feelings, knows that Obi-Wan will talk with him, that Obi-Wan is listening. But he doesn’t want to make a choice, he doesn’t want to face his own growing internal darkness, he doesn’t want to turn to his friends for help. Despite that he had the wisdom to know better.

[weloveanidala]

“open up your mind, let your fantasies unwind, in this darkness that you know you cannot fight…”

oh my god it’s some anidala !!

[weloveanidala]

I’m not crying you’re crying

[weloveanidala]

Padme’s wardrobe reflects the way she stands in two worlds. When she’s alone with Anakin, the lines of her costumes are softer. When she’s sitting as queen or serving the senate, her ensembles are heavier and more formal. She wears the weight of office. Costume designer Trisha Biggar imagined more than thirty costumes for Padme in the prequels at the behest of George Lucas. His scripts expanded the fashion of the galaxy to show more opulent looks than the ones featured in the original trilogy. – Women of the Galaxy

[weloveanidala]

For the anon who asked for a Film Noir AU for Obi-Wan and Satine:

(I went with a late 1940′s look)

I figure Satine would be the elegant and mysterious Lady in Trouble, and Obi-Wan would likely be her lawyer, defending her against false allegations in the courtroom and falling under her spell.

Bonus:

Padme as an intrepid lady reporter, and Anakin and Rex as ex-cops who run a private detective agency:

Palpatine as the corrupt mayor, Dooku as the boss of the crime syndicate, and Ventress as the femme fatale:

[weloveanidala]

Rewatching AOTC and…

ANAKIN WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?

[weloveanidala]

Can you give examples as to when Padmé had let her emotions get in the way of her logical thinking? Both when it comes to Ani and when it doesn’t

In TPM when she just went to fight the Trade Federation without any help at that moment because the Gungans weren't all on their side yet.

In AOTC when she used herself as bait for the assassin. In AOTC when she decided that it'll be bad for Anakin if he loses Obi-Wan too and made him disobey the Order to go to Geonosis. Also in AOTC when she told Anakin they should go to Tatooine to save his mom.

In ROTS when she refused to tell Obi-Wan where Anakin was and refused to believe him that Anakin attacked the temple. In ROTS when she went to Mustafar alone and she wanted to run away with Anakin despite everything he had done. Like even after she finally believed that he did all those things, she was still like ready to go away with him if he just started acting normal again.

There's probably more that I don't remember. There's a lot in TPM too. She acts based on her emotions a lot in there.

[weloveanidala]

THIS ARC IS SUPER INTERESTING IN THAT ANAKIN’S BEHAVIOR IS ABOUT JEALOUSY AND POSSESSION  AND HOW IT’S CONNECTED TO EVERYTHING ELSE GOING ON WITH HIM, ESPECIALLY IN LIGHT OF ROTS. I rewatched all of it recently and the entire arc is about him not trusting Padme to be around Clovis, despite that she’s made it clear that she’s not interested in him and that she’s asking, pleading with Anakin to trust her.  But he doesn’t.  Every time Clovis’ name comes up, he gets enraged, to the point that he tries to literally forbid Padme from going on a mission to help the Republic, he keeps treating her like she has feelings for Clovis despite that she repeatedly says she doesn’t. Obi-Wan comes to talk to him later and just mentioning Clovis’ name creates deep anger in Anakin, who doesn’t say that he thinks Clovis is going to hurt Padme, but that he’s worried she won’t be able to keep her focus around him.

And then there’s the above conversation that is pretty explicitly clear about what Anakin’s problem is:  That he thinks Padme was kissing Clovis. We, the audience, know that Padme doesn’t want this, but Anakin at every turn suspects that something is going to develop between them. We, the audience, know that Padme said, “Clovis, no!” but there’s no indication that Anakin heard that (the door opens before she says it, but Anakin is all the way across the room and it’s not clear if he heard that, whether because of the distance or because of the rush of anger that storms through him). We, the audience, know the full context, but look at the conversation they have here: Anakin:  “I’m so sorry, Padmé. I don’t know what came over me.” Padmé:  “What’s done is done.” Anakin:  “It’s just, when I saw you about to kiss him–” Padmé:  “And I regret that, but it was not what you thought. And you must know, I don’t care for Clovis.” Anakin:  “Don’t you?” “When I saw you about to kiss him” is what Anakin thinks, he thinks she was kissing him.  And Padme follows that up with, “it’s not what you thought” to further make it clear that Anakin has the wrong idea here, as he’s had the wrong idea all along.  She repeats that she doesn’t have feelings for Clovis and Anakin has to know that. “Don’t you?” he asks, because that is the issue for him.  No matter what she says or does, he thinks she has feelings for Clovis.  That she’s going to betray him, because that’s the whole point of Anakin Skywalker’s character and the same exact thing that happens in Revenge of the Sith, that no matter how much love Padme pours into him, he still fears and seethes and is jealously possessive, he’s still willing to believe the absolute worst because he doesn’t trust her, not really. He senses Obi-Wan’s presence in the apartment and is suspicious.  (Obi-Wan came there to talk about Anakin.)  He sees Obi-Wan on Padme’s ship and is so enraged that he chokes her into unconsciousness.  (Despite that Padme says that Obi-Wan wants to help him and is clearly indicating that she had no idea he was on Mustafar.) Anakin’s inability to control his feelings, no matter how much he has no reason to doubt her, is the whole giant message and it plays into the same exact themes of ROTS.  He didn’t see it as Clovis forcing a kiss on Padme, he saw it as Padme choosing to kiss him and he absolutely lost his shit about it, even afterwards, when he realizes he stepped over the line, that he lost it, he still thinks she has feelings for Clovis. And it’s awful that I’m not sure Padme does have anyone to talk to about this anymore.  The only handmaiden we really see in TCW is Teckla, who dies in this arc and we never saw them being terribly close even before this, she has no idea how much Teckla was suffering through because of the war for so long.  We don’t see any handmaidens or friends in Revenge of the Sith (which this arc is set not too long before), she cries alone in her apartment when Anakin is falling apart and the Republic is falling apart, she doesn’t talk to anyone around her, and it is really sad that she’s become so isolated like this and has no one to talk to about her fears about Anakin, even when she should have people like Sabe around or should be able to talk to Bail. What’s worse is that the handmaidens did indeed know:

(Age of Republic - Padme Amidala #1 | by Jody Houser) Her handmaidens knew and protected her secrets for as long as they were with her, but Padme doesn’t seem to actually confide in them, she doesn’t talk to them about her relationship with Anakin, even when they would have kept her secrets. That’s the problem with her marriage–yes, she would potentially lose a lot by revealing it, possibly her position as a Senator, very possibly that Anakin wouldn’t be a Jedi anymore, there’s a whole host of potential political fallout from undisclosed conflict of interests that could really fuck up a lot the work she was trying to do and her rivals would have a field day with–is that she knew it would mean keeping things a secret, knew that it could potentially destroy her, and went ahead with it anyway, while not talking to anyone about it, even those she could have trusted. Padme’s heart rules her just as much as Anakin’s does sometimes, in some really heartbreaking ways.  She has to see the warning signs of him having those dangerous dreams again, like the ones about his mother, and even if she believes that “they’re just dreams” (as she says in ROTS, dismissing them), she has to know that Anakin takes them seriously and will freak out over them, that he murdered an entire village of men and women and children last time this happened, but she doesn’t talk to him about them or talk to anyone else. But her heart bleeds for Anakin, her heart wants to be with him, her heart loves this sweeping epic between them, and so she can’t pull away from it, even when it isolates and destroys her.

#anakin skywalker and the self worth nightmare of unfathomably complex cptsd

[weloveanidala]

AITA for getting into a fight with my wife?

u/podracingking19

(This is a long post pls read I'm DESPERATE) 

Me (M22) and my beautiful amazing wife (F27) have been together for about four years. We were forced to secretly elope due to the religion I used to following banning any and all romantic entanglements. For all the time we've been married there hasn't been a single fight. Usually my wife and I are able to sort our differences calmly and rationally and this time our fight has me super worried. 

I've been having dreams of my wife dying while giving birth to our son. My dreams are prophetic and always come true so this is INCREDIBLY horrifying. It already happened to my mom and I couldn't save her (long story) and I can't let that happen again or I might actually lose my mind. She's all I have left. 

I tried to talk to my boss (M877) about it but he just brushed me off. He said "Letting go is the will of the force" or whatever, he's an inconsiderate prick. I've always disliked the little guy since we first met and he made fun of me for missing my mom. My boss was no help and really he's the only one I could ask. My teacher (M38) would brush me off too since mister perfect never goes against what the bossman says. Asshole. He'd also push the same bullshit and expect me to be okay with potentially losing someone I love AGAIN. I guess he wouldn't understand since he never loved anyone at all. 

Due to all this, I decided to leave my former religious apprenticeship behind. My workplace never appreciated me like I deserved anyway and it pissed me off every. Single. Day. My teacher (more like slave master) never sympathized with me and mocked my struggles. I hate him and his stupid beard and haughty attitude and constant judgements. My wonderful wife is the only person who supported me during these difficult times. She has really pretty eyes and hair and she's the wisest person in the whole wide world. Wait where am I going with this. 

Anyway. My new boss (M63) offered me a new position directly under him as his student which I immediately accepted. He showed me that my former leaders were all LIARS who never understood what really mattered in the universe- power and the means by which to grasp it. 

The most IMPORTANT part of this is that under his leadership I would be able to protect my wife from dying. She's all that matters, I would set the world on fire if it meant she'd stay warm. What other choice could I make? 

My boss told me to do some stuff like clear out my former workplace which I agreed to. It sucked herding out the younger members but thinking of my wife's loving hands got me through it. She would be so happy that we could finally be together in public. 

Or I THOUGHT she would be. When we met up again a couple planets over she was furious. I tried to explain that everything I did was for not only our future but the galaxy's - I planned on overthrowing my old boss for her the first second I got- and that we could carry out her dream together. 

BUT she refused to listen. My wife just said stuff about how "democracy is sacred how could you do this?" and "you're going down a path I can't follow."

I SAVED HER LIFE WHY IS SHE ANGRY? I DON'T UNDERSTAND??? 

I just want us to be together again I love her so much. Was I the bad guy here?

Edit: I forgot to mention my old teacher crawled out of her ship which didn't help matters. For a hot second I thought she betrayed me did something wrong but I swear I regretted it immediately and didn't mean it!