whatthehorsedoicallthisblog

[whatthehorsedoicallthisblog]

[whatthehorsedoicallthisblog]

Me, plunking Stinky Bastard Man’s carrier on the counter: hi he’s here for shots and a nail trim and he’ll need to be sedated

Nurse: Are you sure? We can try-

Me: he needs to be sedated

Nurse: Well, it’ll take longer-

Me: he needs to be sedated, he will try to rip your face off

Nurse: Well we’ll try without first and we’ll let you know if we need to sedate

Me, watching her carry him away: you will need to sedate him

Nurse, coming back 10 minutes later clutching her hand: so, we will need to sedate him

Me:

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burn out

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Internet Safety

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youre weirdly obsessed with finding meaning

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[whatthehorsedoicallthisblog]

"I would die for you."

"I don't want you to die."

"I would kill for you."

"I don't want you to kill."

"Then I have nothing to offer you."

"If I ever find the person who made you think you're worth nothing more than that, they'll pay dearly."

[whatthehorsedoicallthisblog]

i would've fucked so hard as a court jester in ye olde i would've jangled my balls and done a little dance and sang my silly tunes i'd be so good at my job. alas i have to be on tumblr instead which is like a poor imitation of it

[whatthehorsedoicallthisblog]

#someone take them because I don’t want this soiled cucumber

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Being on your phone in bed at home during your free time: this sucks I'm wasting my life away what am I doing

Being on your phone at work:

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it used to be 2007 you know

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Evening Dress

c. 1916

made by Daverkosen’s master tailor Børre-Lorenzen for his daughters wedding

Nationalmuseet

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i love working to the sound of someone else losing their marbles. this is my favorite genre of youtube video

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Pokécember 2021 day 9: A majestic Wyrdeer!

[whatthehorsedoicallthisblog]

still very very slowly making art!! i'll have my little 8pg accordion zine about tidepools at seattle art book fair may 11 & 12 -- in slightly different colors because of [fucked up the riso printing process]

[whatthehorsedoicallthisblog]

my family is fucking addicted to macgyvering and it's becoming a problem. every time something in this house breaks, instead of doing the sensible thing of replacing it or calling someone qualified to fix it, we all group around the offending object with a manic look in our eyes and everyone gets a try at fixing it while being cheered on or ridiculed by the rest.

it's a beautiful bonding activity, but the "creative" fixes have turned our house into a quasihaunted escape room like contraption where everything works, but only in the wonkiest of ways. you need a huge block of iron to turn on the stove. the oven only works if a specific clock is plugged in. the bread machine has a huge wood block just stapled to it that has become foundational to its function. sometimes when you use the toaster the doorbell rings. and that's just the kitchen.

it's all fun and games until you have guests over and you have to lay out the rules of the house like it's a fucking board game. welcome to the beautiful guest room. don't pull out the couch yourself you need a screwdriver for that, and that metal rod makes the lamp work so don't move it. it also made me a terrifying roommate in college, because it makes me think i can fix anything with enough hubris and a drill. you want to call the landlord about a leaky faucet? as if. one time my dad made me install a new power socket because we ran our of extension cords

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These cats were cuddling in the shape of a heart