why-am-i-eeyore

[why-am-i-eeyore]

wanna be adored — p.p

♡ pairing — tasm!peter parker x fem!reader

♡ summary — poor y/n can’t help but get a little needy while tending to pete’s wounds, and he soon has her rutting against his thigh.

♡ includes — sexual content (SMUT below the cut), pwp, praise kink, thigh riding, slight dom/sub dynamics, a shitty ending as per usual

♡ a/n — so this is a self-indulgent fic because we’re all simping over pretty boy andrew right now, tobey too, but that’s for another day. <3

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

He could smell the growing arousal that pooled between the thickness of her thighs, his senses heightened and tingling with the surge of pheromones that whirled from her pores and travelled directly towards him.

Poor little y/n; tending to his wounds whilst he perched on the chair that she had previously accumulated — growing ever so needy from the slight split in his bottom lip to the bruise that blossomed upon his cheek bone.

The suit that stretched across his shoulders — that clung to the taut skin of his pectorals caused an intoxicating haze to blanket her mind, sending her brain into a frenzy of obscene images that she oh-so-desperately wanted him to act upon.

And y/n almost felt guilty! How could she think such a thing when her boyfriend sat bruised and ever so slightly battered, his mask discarded haphazardly to the floor, messy brunette waves just begging to be tugged and his pretty, puffy lips — so hard not to pry them open with her tongue-

“I can smell you pretty girl-” he smirked, strong, flexing arms wrapped around her waist and she didn’t miss the slight wince that flickered along his features — though it was gone in an instant. “what’s gotten you so needy, hm?”

Y/n’s hands had faltered, the damp cloth in her hand nervously clenched between her palm and her face surged with a sudden warmth that had him let out a boyish giggle.

“I- what’re you talking about, Pete?” She huffed out a nervous smile, gasping once his large hands trailed their way to the roundness of her ass cheeks, kneading and squeezing them between his palms before smiling up at her.

“I bet you’re dripping, baby-” Peter’s hands were roaming the span of her stomach, two fingers teasingly dipping below the band of her pyjama trousers, only to snap the elastic against her searing skin. “Come on, who’s got you all needy?”

Y/n puffed out a breath. He knew the answer, he just craved the satisfaction of knowing the effect he had on his lovely girl — revelling in the way he could make her flush within seconds and have her arousal seep through her underwear from just the mere sight of his bruised and ever so slightly blood-ridden figure.

“You, Pete,” she breathed, heart pounding beneath her chest and her lashes fluttered against the soft skin of her cheeks. “M’so needy f’you.”

—

Within a matter of minutes, he had her settled upon his thigh, the whole escapade had her clinging onto his back, inebriated by the way the muscles flexed — no different to the thigh that was settled crude and snug against her pulsing cunt.

“Please!” She stuttered, whining into his ear and rolling her hips at a pathetic pace. The smirk hadn’t vanished from his pretty mouth, instead growing increasingly bigger because of her crooning.

“My pretty girl,” he cooed, “you want my help, huh? Doesn’t feel good when you’re doing it all by yourself, does it?”

She shook her head with so much exuberance, completely dumb from his coos and praises, he hadn’t even filled her up — her clit engorged and throbbing hotly against his suit-clad thigh, the muscles soon flexing tight against her bare mound.

She was babbling mindlessly, tongue lolling from her lips and a silver string of spit ran so obscenely along her chin.

“There we go,” Pete’s hands were on her hips, rocking her back and forth, cooing his little praises and sponging kisses to her throat. “atta girl.”

His cock was stiff under his suit, jolting with every rut of her hips and he wrapped a hand around her throat, long digits squeezing so lightly, his calloused palm putting only the slightest pressure to have her gasping and pleading.

“Who’s my good girl, hm?” She was whining louder now, barely able to hear his pretty voice rumbling through his chest, resonating dull and low in her ears. “Come on, answer me, baby. Who’s my good girl?”

“I am!” Y/n’s fingers clawed at his back, chest pressed tightly against his as it heaved and stuttered for breaths. “I’m your good girl, Pete!”

The rutting of her hips was set at a brutal pace, one she couldn’t quite comprehend — the pressure against her clit inebriated her still and she parted her lips for her whiny, pathetic little whimpers.

“Please can I cum?” she cried, “I’ve been so good for you, Pete- just wanna be your good girl!”

Peter had the nerve to smile before mocking the pout that was upon her puffy, kiss-bitten lips, though he himself was needy enough to feel the need to comply with her plea.

“Need to cum so badly-”

“I know, baby, I know,” he cut her off, once again mocking that pathetic little pout that adorned her mouth. “Go on then. Cum for me, pretty girl.”

The pace she kept was erratic, rutting and thrusting her hips against his thigh, just chasing the orgasm that had been building in the pit of her stomach for mere minutes — the coil so impossibly close to snapping.

And with a few short bucks (along with the help of his hands and the flexing of his thigh, of course), y/n came undone, pussy clenching and unclenching, dripping with arousal and pooling so crude against the material of his suit. Her muscles spasmed, groin aching so deliciously and her clitoris thumped from the intensity.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

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[why-am-i-eeyore]

Memories & Mochi

commission for @lilsbewild

word count: 3.6k

characters: Sasuke x Naruto x f!reader

summary: a normal night with your two boyfriends turns steamier than usual.

tags: poly relationship, threesome, dom/Sub dynamics, oral (m+f), fingering, voyeurism, vaginal sex, creampie, soft aftercare

"You forgot the shrimp," it was a plain statement, with only slight irritation on the raven haired man's behalf.

Naruto laughed nervously from his seat beside you and rubbed the back of his neck, "Uhh, yeah, about that… I didn't forget it, I just… got hungry?"

The deadpan look on Sasuke's face changed to that of adoring aggravation with a sigh, "Tell me how am I supposed to make shrimp fried rice if we don't have shrimp?"

"What about the leftover chicken from last night?" you chimed in, preventing the incident from escalating, you quite dreaded the idea of having to redesign another destroyed room.

"Hmph, that'll work," Sasuke nodded curtly and turned to grab the chicken out, leaving you and the blond to watch patiently, choosing to keep him company while he cooked.

Naruto had his chin leaning on his hand, eyes full of a familiar emotion as he watched his boyfriend, "I can't believe we ended up together some days."

"Yeah me either," you and Sasuke answered in sarcastic unison.

The tone you both held made the blond pout and not long after the puppy dog eyes brought out, "Guys! Really? Am I that bad?"

You two sighed and answered with varying answers of reassuring denials, amused at the sensitivity your joint boyfriend had. Sasuke chopped the vegetables with ease, a faint trace of a smile on his face. You laughed quietly at Naruto's already present tears and slinked your arms around him for a hug. A soft kiss was pressed to his cheek and the tears that were once threatening to spill over were now long gone. The conversation was typical, you each taking turns to describe your day in details that varied from partner to partner. Naruto's was always detailed down to what everyone was wearing, meanwhile Sasuke's was enough to at least let you know what he did during the day. Yours was somewhere in between, a perfect example of how your relationship just so happened to work.

"So what's for dessert?" The wide grin your boyfriend sported would make anyone think he was joking, but the rest of you knew better.

"You just ate a pound of rice and three pounds of chicken, you don't need dessert."

"Sasuke, stop being such a downer! I want dessert."

"Well, I didn't make any, so too bad."

Dessert didn't sound half bad, so you were about to suggest a late evening venture out, but before you could the blond spoke up again, "That's fine, I had something else in mind for it."

For a brief moment you wondered if Naruto hid mochi in the pantry again to surprise you. Then you saw the look your boyfriends shared before they grinned in your direction. You swallowed hard, suddenly feeling small as they leaned in closer, a kiss pressed to the side of your neck and another set of hands slinked around your waist. The barstool beneath you wobbled and you gripped the counter, a quiet gasp leaving you as the eagerness of the men surrounding you became apparent.

Sasuke pulled away from you with a devious grin, "I think just this once we should eat dessert in bed."

The comment alone made your face heat up, realizing that you were dessert made the innuendo that more effective. Naruto smirked, his brain no doubt too full of deplorably horny ideas to verbally respond. Instead, he plucked you off your seat and bent you over his shoulder. It wasn't exactly the most romantic way to get to the bedroom, but knowing he was strong enough to carry you with ease made you forget his lack of chivalry. Once in the bedroom, your back met the soft plushness of the bed and your vision was filled with blond and black hair hanging over you. Ever the eager one, Naruto was already shirtless and tugging at your own blouse. Without much convincing, you let him peel your top off, somehow your pants also come off with it, no doubt thanks to the other unassuming set of hands.

Your boyfriends were always a bit quick to escalate any situation, but they never let you guess their true emotions. Even with a scowl on his face, Sasuke's hands gently traced over your body, fingertips just barely brushing against your skin. Meanwhile, Naruto was occupying himself with pressing kisses up and down your neck, definitely leaving hickies. It was one of his favorite past times, purposely leaving marks where other people were going to see them. Seeing them, seeing other people see them, both situations made him puff up with pride. Their touches were sweet but you were a bit impatient tonight, your hips wiggling when Sasuke’s hands met the sensitive skin. His hands pressed down on your hips more roughly than usual, earning a soft gasp from you.

“Be a good kitten and be patient, or else you’ll have to be punished,” his voice was lower and rougher than normal, nearly taking the air from your lungs once it hit your ears.

Naruto lifted his head from your collarbone and grinned, “You can do that for us, can’t you, princess?”

The sudden change in their demeanors left you speechless, only being able to nod in response. Still, it seemed to satisfy them both as they shimmied out of the rest of their clothes. Sasuke slipped his fingers into the waistband of your pants, pulling them off in one motion and leaving you clad in only your underwear and bra. The blond knelt proudly in the nude next to you, a dangerously serious look on his face.

“I bet you want dessert, too, huh? Don’t worry, haven’t forgotten about you. Here!” The cocky smile on Naruto’s face already clued you into what he was thinking and it was confirmed when he wrapped his fist around his dick and waved it teasingly next to your face.

As if he really needed to ask you. Your mouth was watering as you took in the Adonis above you. Perhaps people called you greedy, having two of the most perfectly sculpted men on the bed with you. And perhaps you just didn’t care, as long as you were able to wrap your lips around their cocks then the town could talk as much as they liked. Naruto was getting antsy and although you began stroking and licking him, his hips still jutted forward, desperate for more. To ice the cake his mouth couldn’t help but let a whine slip out. Sasuke silently scoffed and rolled his eyes at the sight, though he’d be lying if he said it didn’t make his cock throb. The raven haired man let you focus on the other while he innocently slipped your underwear off and spread your thighs.

Sitting back on his heels, he took a moment to appreciate the sight. You laid there, so helplessly, sucking off Naruto like you were getting paid, legs open for him to see your most intimate parts. If he would have stayed motionless for another minute he might have gotten sentimental within his thoughts, wondering how you two ever put up with him, thankful that you put up with him. Instead, he chose to shake himself back to reality and laid himself between your soft thighs, licking a stripe up your core. The shock the sudden action had on you made him smirk against your core and filled him with even more vigor.

Your thighs instinctively went to close but were caught in Sasuke’s demanding grip. It wasn’t too tight, but enough that your thighs were effectively forced back down and open. He didn’t waste any time in, for lack of better words, devouring you. Out of your two boyfriends he wasn’t exactly the one who understood the phrase ‘have mercy’ and was determined to make you cum as many times as he could. In doing so, it also sent Naruto that much closer to the edge, especially when you gasped and moaned around his cock with the occasional hard suck when Sasuke hit that special spot inside of you.

Naruto had your hair in a tight hold so he could slightly guide your pace and overall control your mouth. He feared if he didn’t control the pace even a bit he would have busted five minutes ago. Still, controlling the motions of your mouth didn’t help too much as a few minutes later he was grunting and pushing further down your throat. You were helpless to resist and not like you really wanted to anyways. His warm cum spurted into your mouth, knowing without him saying that you had to swallow it. Both men were strangely intense tonight, just their attitudes alone being commanding and domineering. Sasuke still hadn’t let up between your legs, swiftly bringing you to the first orgasm of the night.

Your thighs didn’t even stop shaking before he was once again sucking on your clit and curling his fingers right into your sweet spot. Fingers laced through his hair and it took a moment for him to realize they weren’t yours. Instead, Naruto had a grip on Sasuke’s hair, simultaneously tugging on it and shoving his face further into your sopping wet pussy.

“C’mon, is that all you got for her? Princess deserves better. If it were me she’d already be on number three by now,” his words were dangerous and he knew exactly what he was doing.

The Uchiha’s eyebrows furrowed and he gripped your thigh with his free hand more tightly, speeding up the actions of his other hand and his mouth. Leaving you to flop your head back against the bed and gasp, trying to catch your breath. You were barely able to recover from the first orgasm and here he was fervently driving you towards the edge of another one, another one, no doubt thanks to the provoking Naruto gave. Words alluded you for the second time that night, half formed cuss words fell from your lips between moans and desperate pants.

Your vision blurred as your back arched and you once again came on Sasuke’s face, who greedily licked every drop of your juices up. To your relief, he finally pulled away, wiping his face on the back of his hand with a grin. Before he could do anything else, Naruto gripped his jaw and leaned in to kiss him. They groaned into each other’s mouth, leaving you laying on the bed, propped up on your elbows just so you could watch. When they pulled away Sasuke moved to position himself right back where he was until Naruto stopped him.

“Don’t be greedy, Sasuke! It’s my turn for dessert!” the blond pouted and tugged on the other’s arm.

With a sigh, Sasuke relented and instead sat back on the pillows at the head of the bed, allowing himself a perfect sight of you and Naruto. The excitement was clear in Naruto’s eyes as he smiled down at you, then wrapped his hands around your thighs and gave a kitten lick to your still sensitive clit. The way your legs tensed up made him laugh quietly before he went back and did it again. His tongue wandered down and fucked slowly into your hole while one of his fingers lazily circled your clit. The pace he set was slow, almost the opposite from your other boyfriend, though it was clear he was just as eager and determined. Your breath was still heavy, a moan of either of their name’s occasionally falling from your mouth.

Just feeling the way you reacted to his touch made Naruto moan against your core, his own hips grinding against the bed as he continued to eat you quite literally like you were dessert. Let’s just say there’s a reason he’s so good at cleaning ramen bowls. The way his tongue swirled around your insides was intoxicating and the way he moaned about how good you tasted made your eyes roll back into your head. His fluffy blond hair easily wound between your fingers and even though you tugged, he kept going, knowing if you truly wanted him to stop you would have uttered the safe word.

Sasuke watched from his place at the head at the bed, slowly stroking himself, “Hurry up and make her cum already. I want to fuck our kitten.”

Naruto whined at Sasuke intervening, but you could still feel him quickening his motions, your third climax taking longer to reach than the first two. Perhaps it was the fact that you were oversensitive, or maybe just the way your boyfriend was taking his time in pleasing you. But now that he sped up, your core started tightening once again. The hand that wasn’t rubbing you slid up your torso to play with your tits, rolling one nipple between his fingers before switching to the other. Your head fell back with a moan as your hips instinctively began to grind down into his touch.

After the teasing from Sasuke, Naruto had renewed passion and vigor. Before, he was purposely avoiding your sweet spot where now he was rubbing it with every thrust of his fingers. Briefly, you thought tonight might be the night the two drive you completely insane with their onslaughts of pleasure, but that was quickly replaced by your fast approaching climax. At this point your hips and thighs began to shake and you couldn’t stop the obscene sounds falling from your mouth. Sasuke grunted loudly, still fucking up into his fist, meanwhile Naruto’s grip on your hips no doubt was going to bruise, his eyes squeezing shut as he focused even harder. He always seemed to falter when you came on his face, the sight was just too much for him to handle, so instead he shut his eyes and kept going, greedily cleaning up everything you gave him.

You laid there for a moment, basking in the after climax glow and letting your vision slowly return. Naruto removed his mouth from your core and laid his head on your thigh like a pillow as he caught his breath. The two of you kept eye contact until another pair of hands slid around your waist and Sasuke kissed over the marks Naruto left earlier. Instinctively, you leaned back into his demanding touch, cherishing the soft caresses he gave. His lips were gentle on your neck, his hair brushing against your sensitive skin.

“Ride me.” his voice was deep and commanding, and being so close to your ear it made you shiver.

Slowly, he pulled you up until you were sitting with your back to his toned chest, hips pressing against his. You looked at Naruto, who was watching intently as you slowly sank down onto Sasuke’s thick length. The look in his eyes as he watched made you flustered, though you were soon distracted by Sasuke bottoming out inside of you. A moan left you as he gave a testing soft thrust and you rested your head back on his chest, moving your hips down to meet his. Slowly, you began to ride your dark haired boyfriend, his hands on your waist as he helped guide and steady you. Naruto sat in front of you, now taking his turn stroking himself while he watched you.

“You look so pretty stuffed with cock, I know you can go faster babe, c’mon. The faster you fuck him the faster we can go get mochi,” Naruto teased with a grin and just the thought of having to do something after this activity had you groaning.

Nonetheless, you began to move your shaky legs faster, desperate for Sasuke’s cock to fill you more. He sighed into your shoulder and wrapped his arms around your waist, making you stop your movements. Before you could complain Sasuke began fucking up into you, his pace faster than anything your worn out thighs could accomplish. Naruto groaned as he watched your shared boyfriend’s balls slap against your clit with each thrust, matching Sasuke’s pace as he jerked his own cock. Your boyfriends could be overwhelming at times such as these, but it was nice that you didn’t have to exert much effort, Sasuke could tell you were getting worn out and he was more than happy to pick up the slack for you.

“Fuck you feel so good,” Sasuke mumbled into the skin of your neck as he kept pounding, moving to lay you both on your sides, lifting one of your legs slightly.

The new angle nearly drove you insane for what felt like the millionth time that night and you hugged the arm that Sasuke had snuck underneath your body. As you hugged his arm he still was able to reach his fingers down and rub at your abused clit. His hips never faltered, thrusting into you as he chased his own high as well. The only thing that tore you from your mounting pleasure was Naruto’s whines across from you. He was nearing his own climax too, if his constant moans and curses were any way to tell.

Sasuke grunted in between kissing your shoulder, his grip on your plush thigh tightening a bit, “C’mon, go ahead and cum, kitten, cum for us, wanna fill you up so bad.”

It was the one time Sasuke got desperate and lost just a bit of his usual control. Not like you would complain as he quickened his pace and focused on driving you closer to cumming. Your walls began to flutter around his cock and he moaned in your ear such a delightful sound, making you moan as well. Another harsh rub of your clit and your body tensed before being sent into a flurry of sensations as you came on your boyfriend’s cock. Sasuke held you closer and moaned your name as he thrusted himself in deep one last time as he began to cum. Meanwhile Naruto was fucking his fist desperately in front of you, face a deep red as he was so close just watching his two lovers consume each other.

As Sasuke slowly fucked his cum further into you, you moaned from the overstimulation, eyes focused on Naruto’s hands working his length. He leaned forward, gasping and moaning your names as he shot his load over your faces, admiring the way his cum landed on both you and Sasuke. Sasuke, on the other hand, wasn’t too impressed. Slowly, he pulled out of you and you shuddered at the loss of warmth, a cold breeze replacing it over your sensitive pussy. You were gently laid down and they each pressed a kiss to one of your cheeks before sharing a kiss with each other.

“Now go get a cloth, asshole, we have to clean our faces because of you,” Sasuke half pouted, a sight that made you giggle quietly.

“Alright, alright, sheesh,” Naruto harrumphed and trotted his bare ass to the bathroom before coming back with sweats on and a damp cloth which he handed to Sasuke, “I’m gonna go get mochi now! I’ll be back!”

Sasuke began to gently clean you first, paying extra attention to your sensitive areas, before looking up to Naruto, “Okay, be careful, hurry back.”

They shared another quick kiss and Naruto gave you one as well before scurrying out the door, you only hope he remembered to put a shirt on. The remaining boyfriend resumed taking care of you, kissing each visible mark that was left on your skin by the two of them. After he was done using the now cold cloth he went to the bathroom, when he came back he also grabbed a pair of Naruto’s sweats and brought you a shirt. You sat up and realized it was the one Sasuke had been wearing earlier, slipping it on easily and also shimmied into the pair of frog boxers he gave you.

“It smells like you,” you snuggled into the shirt and lifted the bed blankets to snuggle deeper.

“Well as long as the boxers don’t smell like Naruto, I think you’ll be fine.”

You laughed and shook your head as he sat next to you, pulling you into his arms, “No, it’s a good thing the shirt smells. And Naruto smells good! Though...yeah if his boxers smelled...gross…”

“You look good in my shirt,” he mumbled a bit, his cheeks a light shade of pink while he began to change the subject, turning the TV on.

“Hope Naruto hurries up.”

“You want mochi that bad?”

“No, jerk, I want to snuggle with everyone!”

You fake punch his chest, the muscle not even budging at the movement against it, his hands wrapping around your little fist, “I know. So do I…”

Before you could lament further the front door slammed open, slammed shut and thunderous footsteps stormed through the house. Naruto burst into the door, a rather full bag in his hand. His chest heaved as he caught his breath, obviously having sprinted there and back and he did indeed ‘forget’ his shirt. Nonetheless, you couldn’t be bothered to care or chastise him as he crawled into the bed on your empty side. Quickly the mochi was presented and little plates given to each of you. A movie was picked and you scooted closer together as it started, happily munching on your treats.

“I’m so glad I’m with you guys,” Naruto sighed dreamily as the movie began to play, resting his head atop yours. Although neither Sasuke or you chose to verbally respond to his comment, everyone in the bed knew that feeling was mutual. Even when things got tough, if the three of you could live out your days together that’s more than you could ask for.

[why-am-i-eeyore]

illiantt’s kinktober masterlist

I decided to try to join this year’s kinktober. I’ll be writing smut dialogues, drabbles or blurbs. So they all might differ in length.

Navigation

Warnings: I’ll be adding warnings on top of each writing. Please read the warnings before proceeding. And keep in mind that all characters are over 18 years old—even if it’s set in school.

a/n: I will try to follow the schedule when to post, but be aware that I might postpone or change some writings, depending on my creativity and availability. So I might add or remove some of the writings.

Please remember that all my work are 18+ ONLY, so MINORS DO NOT INTERACT !!

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

1st Oct — Remus Lupin // size kink

2nd Oct — James Potter // public oral (female receiving)

3rd Oct — Poly!Marauders // breeding kink, foursome

5th Oct — Draco Malfoy // recording of act

8th Oct — Regulus Black // cockwarming, public sex

9th Oct — Poly!Marauders // mutual masturbation

10th Oct — Draco Malfoy // ice play

14th Oct — Remus Lupin // daddy kink

16th Oct — Sirius Black // piss kink

21th Oct — Draco Malfoy // praise kink

7th Nov — Hermione Granger // innocent/corruption kink

TBA — Poly!Marauders // dare game

TBA — Sirius Black // caught in the act

TBA — Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, Theodore Nott // blindfolded

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

[why-am-i-eeyore]

When Daddy’s Not Around Masterlist

Summary:  Party animal, Y/N’s life is spiralling out of control until she discovers celebrity, Jensen Ackles, is her real father. Moving to Austin, she decides to turn her life around, but Jensen isn’t the only man she learns to love

Characters: You, Jensen Ackles, Christina Ackles (OFC), Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, others to follow I’m sure…

Pairings: Reader x Other, (Eventual) Jared x Reader

Rating: 18+ (Smut, Angst, Fluff)

Tags: dad!Jensen, long lost father, angst, fluff, slow burn romance, teasing, slow burn smut, mentions of crappy childhood, inappropriate relationship, age gap (reader is 18 Jared is 33), drug use, mentions of fertility issues, marriage problems  A/Ns: This is a plot line for a Fanfiction I wrote about my favourite band when I was like 15. I’ve majorly revamped it and whatnot, and I’m so excited for this! For the sake of this story, this is set 4/5 years ago, Jared is single and Jensen is married to an OFC (Christina). This is a RPF but the only thing real about it are the people, nothing else. Just in case anyone wants to get offended :’)

- - -

Chapter One 

Chapter Two

Chapter Three 

Chapter Four 

Chapter Five  

Chapter Six 

Chapter Seven 

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine 

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen 

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen 

Chapter Seventeen 

Chapter Eighteen 

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty One

Chapter Twenty Two 

Chapter Twenty Three 

Chapter Twenty Four 

Chapter Twenty Five (FIN)

[why-am-i-eeyore]

Reblog or your mom will die in 928 seconds.

I love my mom.

I am risking nothing

I AM SORRY FOLLOWERS, I LOVE MY MOMMY

Will not risk.

sorry followers :(

[why-am-i-eeyore]

[why-am-i-eeyore]

Y’all listening to Corpse telling scary stories:

[why-am-i-eeyore]

[why-am-i-eeyore]

this is the most innocent yak i have ever seen. this lifted my spirits a little.

[why-am-i-eeyore]

All I can think of every time I see a character doing archery in tv/film is Voldemort.

[why-am-i-eeyore]

Some assholes have been putting nails in cheese and treats in dog parks in Chicago and Massachusetts. Also adding antifreeze to water bowls.

Please watch out for your dogs. And if you find out the address of someone doing this, give me the address and tell no one. I will disembowel them.

[why-am-i-eeyore]

[why-am-i-eeyore]

God His Thighs - Theo Raeken x Reader

Pairing: Theo x Reader

Prompt: Theo Raekens abs!

Warning: FLUFF SO MUCH FUCKING FLUFF!!

ENJOY!!

******

“Why is he here?” You snarled angrily as you looked Theo up and down with distaste.

Scott sighed as Stiles nod in agreement. Liam however seemed less judgemental than usual, which you internally pouted about. Alec the newest member of the pack looked between you and Theo with curious eyes.

Keep reading

[why-am-i-eeyore]

When Daddy’s Not Around Masterlist

Summary:  Party animal, Y/N’s life is spiralling out of control until she discovers celebrity, Jensen Ackles, is her real father. Moving to Austin, she decides to turn her life around, but Jensen isn’t the only man she learns to love

Characters: You, Jensen Ackles, Christina Ackles (OFC), Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, others to follow I’m sure…

Pairings: Reader x Other, (Eventual) Jared x Reader

Rating: 18+ (Smut, Angst, Fluff)

Tags: dad!Jensen, long lost father, angst, fluff, slow burn romance, teasing, slow burn smut, mentions of crappy childhood, inappropriate relationship, age gap (reader is 18 Jared is 33), drug use, mentions of fertility issues, marriage problems  A/Ns: This is a plot line for a Fanfiction I wrote about my favourite band when I was like 15. I’ve majorly revamped it and whatnot, and I’m so excited for this! For the sake of this story, this is set 4/5 years ago, Jared is single and Jensen is married to an OFC (Christina). This is a RPF but the only thing real about it are the people, nothing else. Just in case anyone wants to get offended :’)

- - -

Chapter One 

Chapter Two

Chapter Three 

Chapter Four 

Chapter Five  

Chapter Six 

Chapter Seven 

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine 

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen 

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen 

Chapter Seventeen 

Chapter Eighteen - Coming 20th February - Available on Patreon now!

Chapter Nineteen - Coming 22nd February - Available on Patreon now!

Chapter Twenty - Coming 25th February - Available on Patreon now!

[why-am-i-eeyore]

S.Mendes & Team Masterlist

(*smut )

SHAWN MENDES

Sleepy Mornings

Disconnected

Lingerie*

Rough day

Books, Guitar Lessons and Kisses (college AU)

Sleepless

Date Night

Losing Grip and Sanity (zombie AU)

Big Bad Wolf (werewolf AU)

Stress Relief*

Nights on the Tour Bus*

Jetlag*

High*

Make You Feel Good*

Mirrors*

Fancy Idiot

Drunken Babbles (Are Sober Thoughts)

Small Touches*

Good Morning*

Afterglow

Late Night Returns

For You

—————–

Multi Chapter Stories

Neighbors* ¦ Part 2* ¦

Drive* ¦ Part 2* ¦

New York City ¦ Toronto ¦ Tokyo ¦

Cold Days With(out) You ¦ Part 2 ¦ Part 3 ¦ Part 4 ¦ Part 5 ¦ Part 6*

If Walls Could Talk* ¦ Part 2 ¦ Part 3 ¦ Part 4* ¦ Part 5 ¦ Part 6 ¦ Part 7 ¦ Part 8 ¦ Part 9 ¦ Part 10 ¦ Part 11 ¦ Part 12* ¦ Part 13 (roommate AU)

Dirty Little Secret (Who Has To Know?)* ¦ Part 2* ¦ Part 3 ¦ Part 4* ¦ Part 5* ¦ Part 6 ¦ Part 7 ¦ Part 8 ¦ Part 9 ¦ Part 10* ¦ Part 11 ¦ Part 12 ¦ Part 13 ¦ Part 14 ¦ Part 15 ¦ Part 16 ¦ Part 17 ¦ Part 18 ¦ Part 19 ¦ Epilogue- Shawn ¦ Cez (Shawn/Reader/Cez)

DLS Specials - What Happened In Spain* ¦ Heartbeats

Curious Hands ¦ Curious Mouth ¦ Curious Lips ¦ Curious Bodies ¦ Curious Highs ¦ Curious Interruptions ¦ Curious Talks ¦ Curious Feeling ¦ Curious Waters ¦ Curious Backseats ¦ Curious Eyes ¦ Curious Warmth ¦ Curious Depth ¦ Curious Vibes ¦ Curious Limits (discontinued)

—————–

Masterlist of Prompts

—————– 

Requests

Breakdown

Put my mind to rest

Return Home

Study Break

The Art of Screaming 

Reunion*

First Time Insecurities*

Ballet Memories

Haunted Houses

Not enough

Happy fucking Birthday*

Take a Break

–—–—–—–—–—–

–—–—–—–—–—–

CEZ DARKE

Be Your Teenage Dream Tonight*

Just The Way You Are

Remember When ¦ Part 2*

–—–—–—–—–—–

–—–—–—–—–—–

CONNOR BRASHIER

Sweet Talker

In The Morning

Post Concert High

California Nights*

[why-am-i-eeyore]

heavenly bodies

request: Hey! If you want, I was thinking of a Shawn Mendes imagine where y/n (who’s famous) and him dated in the past and are still on good terms and decided to be together in the future. They run into each other at the met gala, and y/n gets jealous of him and Hailey and makes smart remarks about the 2. In the end they get together?

a/n: this might be my favorite work so far, idki loved the idea and i might have gotten a little carried away but whatever. sorry that the snarky remarks arent the best ive never been a confrontational person so that a hard for me to write - please enjoy!

warnings: language, heavy smut

“Troye!” you grinned, wrapping your arms around him, the mesh material of his shirt, scratching your exposed skin as he bent down to embrace you tighter.

“I’ve missed you,” he mumbled into your hair.

“I’m sorry we didn’t get to meet up earlier,” you said as you pulled away, his wide eyes taking in your appearance as you grinned, “It took a while to get ready.”

“I can see that,” he took your right hand in his, spinning you around, “you look fucking gorgeous. Like an angel.”

Keep reading

[why-am-i-eeyore]

When Daddy’s Not Around Masterlist

Summary:  Party animal, Y/N’s life is spiralling out of control until she discovers celebrity, Jensen Ackles, is her real father. Moving to Austin, she decides to turn her life around, but Jensen isn’t the only man she learns to love

Characters: You, Jensen Ackles, Christina Ackles (OFC), Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, others to follow I’m sure…

Pairings: Reader x Other, (Eventual) Jared x Reader

Rating: 18+ (Smut, Angst, Fluff)

Tags: dad!Jensen, long lost father, angst, fluff, slow burn romance, teasing, slow burn smut, mentions of crappy childhood, inappropriate relationship, age gap (reader is 18 Jared is 33), drug use, mentions of fertility issues, marriage problems  A/Ns: This is a plot line for a Fanfiction I wrote about my favourite band when I was like 15. I’ve majorly revamped it and whatnot, and I’m so excited for this! For the sake of this story, this is set 4/5 years ago, Jared is single and Jensen is married to an OFC (Christina). This is a RPF but the only thing real about it are the people, nothing else. Just in case anyone wants to get offended :’)

- - -

Chapter One 

Chapter Two

Chapter Three 

Chapter Four 

Chapter Five  

Chapter Six 

Chapter Seven 

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine 

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen - Coming 11th February - Available on Patreon now!

Chapter Fifteen - Coming 13th February - Available on Patreon now!

Chapter Sixteen - Coming 15th February - Available on Patreon now!