zatxrn

[zatxrn]

CRAIG: Take that!

GREGORY: Ow! Hey!

STAN: gasp wheeeeeeeeze

STAN: hhfugyhgjfjdghh

GREGORY: Oh how impeccable, look at what you’ve made me do!

GREGORY: He’s still alive!

GREGORY: That hurt, you little pest…!

CRAIG: How dense is your skull dude, what the hell…

STAN: buhhh…

STAN: it’s ..,. just a ch eap chair, dude…,.,

CRAIG: No it broke cause I’m super strong.

STAN: hhHHhhhhwhhhhatever you say, craig…

CRAIG: Hey I just saved your ass–

GREGORY: You’re both idiots.

GREGORY: You really think it’s that simple to get rid of me, Craig?

GREGORY: You’re dumber than I thought…

GREGORY: And the bar was already very low, mind you!

THOMAS: Don’t you think we should go in there and help…?

TWEEK: Man, I don’t wanna get involved.

TWEEK: If Gregory saw us walk in with Craig, he’d call… you know who.

THOMAS: Okay, but if he saw us just standing around…?

TWEEK: I… I guess–

TWEEK: Who’s…

THOMAS: Dude, maybe you should get out of the street???

TWEEK: N-no, no, they’ll stop for m–

TWEEK: OSDUIFJH(SY*DUFJ

THOMAS: Oh my gHH FUCK– SHIT SHIT– c-COCKFUCKER FUCkING hHHHFUCKHhhUUUGHHHG–

TOKEN: OH!

TOKEN: I thought there was a deer in the road so I–

TOKEN: Oh god what did I hit?

THOMAS: YOU HIT– sHIT FUCK– oh god DAM-HBBLLBUUUGHHHRHGHGH-

STAN: Dude.

KYLE: Dude.

STAN: What the hell is happening out there.

KYLE: Is that Token and Clyde?

STAN: What are those things?

STAN: Oh ew one of them is puking.

GREGORY: Oh for the love of…

GREGORY: What is happening out there?

KYLE: I think Token just hit some winged freak with his car.

GREGORY: Of course he did.

TWEEK: uuuuuuuu…

THOMAS: BHHOURUUHGGHGHHGGHGHGHGHGHLGHLGLGLLLHHHHH

TOKEN: Oh– oh…

TOKEN: It’s that new… guy… demon…

CLYDE: Oh no…

CLYDE: Poor thing…

CLYDE: Is he gonna be okay…?

TOKEN: Well… he’s still moving, I guess.

TOKEN: I dunno how much I want him to be moving, though…

THOMAS: H-how dID yOU NOT SEE HI-fUCK SHIT– HHGJGFIOOUGUGHHH-

CLYDE: Sorry, I saw a deer in the road and Token got scared and swerved!

CLYDE: …Right into…

CLYDE: Aw man…

CLYDE: I know he was a demon but he was cool…

TOKEN: Well what do we… do with him…?

TWEEK: I’mmm not… dead… you assholes…

GREGORY: That’s good.

GREGORY: You can tell me what in the hell is going on here, then.

TWEEK: hhhh…

CLYDE: Oh no it’s you again–

CLYDE: (please don’t make us sing and dance again, please don’t make us sing and dance again, pl)

[zatxrn]

TOKEN: You were in that bathroom for a while, dude.

TOKEN: Everything okay?

CLYDE: What? Pssh, yeah dude I’m fine.

TOKEN: It’s okay if you needed a second to yourself or something.

TOKEN: The last few hours have been…

CLYDE: No, no I know bro.

CLYDE: I just needed to pee.

TOKEN: …Alright…

CLYDE: …Where do we go now…?

TOKEN: I don’t really know…

TOKEN: Now that all of the adrenaline has, like… calmed down…

TOKEN: I kinda regret just… running off and driving out here.

CLYDE: Yeah…

CLYDE: Do you think we should go back…?

TOKEN: I think… maybe… we should try and make sure Craig is okay.

TOKEN: Like… what if we just left him there, and he isn’t dead, but he’s like…

TOKEN: I dunno.

CLYDE: No I know, bro.

CLYDE: Maybe I should try calling him or something…

TOKEN: I mean, I wouldn’t expect an answer.

TOKEN: Even if he is alive, he might be too busy to look at his phone.

CLYDE: Yeah, but it’s still worth a shot.

TOKEN: …Okay.

TOKEN: I’m turning the car around and heading back into town.

TWEEK: Are you really gonna try and stop him, man?

TWEEK: You don’t even know what he can do!

CRAIG: I don’t need to hear this shit from a fucking demon, okay?

CRAIG: It’s my fault all of you guys are here, and I’m not gonna let anybody else die by your hands.

CRAIG: I don’t even like Stan.

CRAIG: But he’s not gonna die like Jimmy.

CRAIG: I won’t let that happen.

CRAIG: Oh my god, seriously?

CRAIG: Who the hell is…

CLYDE: OH MY GOD BRO YOU PICKED UP!

CLYDE: TH

CLYDE: This is you, right?

CLYDE: Like, none of the demons have your phone right now, right?

CLYDE: Please say yes.

CRAIG: Dude chill the fuck out, let me speak.

CLYDE: DUDE you have NO idea how happy I am to hear your voice–

CLYDE: DUDE TOKEN, IT’S CRAIG, HE’S OKAY!

CLYDE: DO YOU HEAR TOKEN, BRO?

CRAIG: No, Clyde–

CRAIG: Shut up for a second.

CRAIG: I don’t know where the hell you guys are, but some shit is going down.

CRAIG: And it’s all my fault.

CLYDE: W-Where are you, dude?

CLYDE: We’re in Token’s car, we can come help!

CRAIG: Just…

CRAIG: Get to Stan’s house.

CLYDE: Stan’s house?–

CRAIG: I gotta go.

CRAIG: Don’t call me again.

GREGORY: All these years, hmm?

GREGORY: And you thought you’d never have to face the consequences of what you’ve done…

GREGORY: You didn’t even call anybody.

GREGORY: You didn’t even tell a single soul, now did you?

STAN: hhkh–

GREGORY: Shh shh shh…

GREGORY: No need to speak.

GREGORY: I wouldn’t want you to die running your useless mouth.

GREGORY: I want you to die feeling everything I have over the last eight years, Stan…

GREGORY: I want you to die knowing you’re about to lose everything you’ve ever loved!

GREGORY: I want you to die, as simple as that, and I want you to know there’s nothing you can do about it!

GREGORY: And I’ll be laughing and dancing around your lifeless corpse, and your friends will watch, and they’ll be let go, and they’ll keep on living knowing their best friend was a murderer who never repented for their wrong doings and you’ll be dead knowing ╬ they’re alive and well and that they hate you forever and ever and ever and ever and ╬ ever

GREGORY: and ever and ever and ever and ever ╬ and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever ╬ and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever an ╬ d ever and ╬ ╬ ever and ever and ever and ever and ev ╬ er and ever and ever and ev ╬ ╬ er and ╬ ever and e ╬ ╬ ╬ ver and ev ╬ ╬ er and ever and ever ╬ and ever and ╬ eve ╬ r and ever and e ╬ ve ╬ r a ╬ ╬ nd ever a ╬ nd ╬ ever ╬ ╬ ╬ an ╬ ╬ d ever an ╬ ╬ ╬ d e ╬ ver ╬ and ╬ eve ╬ r ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬

GREGORY: You’ll die a much more memorable death than I, dear friend.

GREGORY: You should at least thank me for that.

[zatxrn]

So… Hell Park is super cool

[zatxrn]

DAMIEN: Start over from the beginning.

TOKEN: Well…

TOKEN: It all started yesterday night… we all played with a ouija board… at Craig’s house.

TOKEN: And then we left when things started getting weird, but we didn’t really think much of it…

TOKEN: We were high.

DAMIEN: That’s really stupid.

TOKEN: Yeah. I know.

TOKEN: Everything seemed fine after we left.

TOKEN: And even this morning, I called Craig to make sure he was alright.

TOKEN: He said he was, but he had a weird dream… about a demon.

DAMIEN: So he passed out after you guys left.

TOKEN: I think that’s what he said, yeah.

TOKEN: And he seemed okay, up until that… new kid joined our class.

DAMIEN: New kid?

DAMIEN: Let me guess.

DAMIEN: He turned out to be

TOKEN: A demon, yeah.

TOKEN: …Yeah…

TOKEN: But we didn’t know that at the time.

TOKEN: Craig said that he looked familiar, but we thought it was dumb.

TOKEN: And Craig even asked him, like “Are you a demon?”

TOKEN: And the power went out.

TOKEN: And we still didn’t believe him.

DAMIEN: I knew something seemed off when the power went out.

TOKEN: Yeah…

TOKEN: We decided to go out and figure out what was going on.

TOKEN: Craig, Clyde, Jimmy, the new kid and I all went out of the cafeteria.

TOKEN: And in the dark… at the end of the hall, was this guy.

TOKEN: At first, I couldn’t tell who he was.

TOKEN: But when my eyes adjusted, it was…

TOKEN: It was that one kid who died, like… a while back.

TOKEN: A long, long time ago. When we were kids.

DAMIEN: There’s a million kids who die all the time.

DAMIEN: Be specific.

TOKEN: Pip, that british kid.

DAMIEN: …Uhhhh huh…

DAMIEN: Okay… hmm.

DAMIEN: What next.

TOKEN: …W-well…

TOKEN: He was saying a lot of stuff, and I was too freaked out in the moment to really process a lot of it.

TOKEN: So we all booked it, including the new kid.

TOKEN: And I thought we all made it out.

TOKEN: I didn’t even think about Jimmy.

TOKEN: I feel so, so bad about forgetting about him.

TOKEN: I just didn’t look back, and then I was too panicked to think straight, and–

DAMIEN: Chill.

TOKEN: [huff]

TOKEN: We ran for a bit.

TOKEN: We only stopped once Clyde couldn’t breath anymore.

TOKEN: And Craig was acting really weird…

TOKEN: Like his mind was super occupied, and he was kind of antsy, which is definitely not like him, at all.

TOKEN: He was kinda muttering to himself, and telling us to shut up, even when we weren’t talking.

DAMIEN: He’s probably got a case of the hell chatters.

TOKEN: Hell chatters.

DAMIEN: Yeah.

TOKEN: You gonna… explain that… or…

DAMIEN: No.

TOKEN: …

TOKEN: Okay… uh.

TOKEN: Well… he decided, eventually, that all of us were going to Stark’s Pond.

TOKEN: And thinking about it now, it almost feels like he was controlled by someone when he said that.

TOKEN: I have no idea why he wanted to go to Stark’s Pond.

TOKEN: But we didn’t really think much of it and we went with him.

DAMIEN: Not thinking seems to be a trope here with you guys.

TOKEN: Look, it’s all been… super stressful.

DAMIEN: Sure, bud.

TOKEN: So we get there. And we start asking the new kid a couple of questions, because now after everything that happened, we were a little suspicious.

TOKEN: And then Craig starts freaking the hell out.

TOKEN: We try to figure out what’s going on, and he doesn’t make any sense at all.

TOKEN: Then this…

TOKEN: Then someone else showed up.

TOKEN: And then we realised that the new kid was a demon, too.

TOKEN: And so was the guy who showed up.

DAMIEN: Stop omitting details.

DAMIEN: Give me their names.

TOKEN: …

TOKEN: Well the guy who showed up… it was Gregory.

TOKEN: That really snooty guy, from a while back, too.

DAMIEN: Oh, that sad sack of…

DAMIEN: What reason does he have to be here right now?

TOKEN: Dude, I don’t know!

DAMIEN: Well no wonder you say there’s so many others running around right now.

DAMIEN: Your friend let that guy in.

TOKEN: What does that mean?

DAMIEN: Look man, I have somewhere to be in half an hour, I don’t have time to explain all the dumb intricacies of your issues.

DAMIEN: Just keep going.

TOKEN: Well– I– Ugh.

TOKEN: Okay, the new kid’s name was Tweek.

DAMIEN: Ew, of course.

TOKEN: Um… But Gregory, when he showed up…

TOKEN: He did this whole… song and dance number.

TOKEN: With Pip, and Tweek, and eventually, another kid.

TOKEN: I used to see him around school a couple years back, but I never really knew him…

TOKEN: I think his name was Thomas.

TOKEN: …He seemed like he didn’t want to hurt anybody.

TOKEN: I don’t know.

TOKEN: He’s a demon now, too?

DAMIEN: None of these guys your dealing with are actually demons, you know that right?

DAMIEN: Like, the closest you have to a demon is Pip, the rat bastard.

TOKEN: Wh…

TOKEN: Okay.

TOKEN: They’re all still from hell.

TOKEN: Anyway, they finish that song, and Pip throws… Jimmy’s…

TOKEN: Corpse…

TOKEN: Just. Right out there.

TOKEN: On t-the ground… For all of us to see–

TOKEN: [gag]

DAMIEN: Take it easy, cow boy.

DAMIEN: Let’s wrangle you up a slushie to cool your stomach.

TOKEN: Uh–

TOKEN: Um.

TOKEN: We didn’t know what to do. So we ran again.

TOKEN: And this time, Craig got left behind.

TOKEN: I don’t think anybody else followed us.

TOKEN: I can’t tell.

DAMIEN: Not this far, no.

TOKEN: I don’t know if Craig is still alive or not.

TOKEN: I’m…

TOKEN: I feel awful for leaving him behind.

TOKEN: But…

DAMIEN: Simple flight or fight response.

TOKEN: Yeah, well..

TOKEN: That “simple” response probably got two of my friends killed.

TOKEN: I just don’t know what to do…

TOKEN: What if the police find out?

TOKEN: What if the cops come to question us?

TOKEN: What are we supposed to say?

TOKEN: Demons came and got us?

TOKEN: Oh god, what if they go and kill more people?

DAMIEN: That’s not likely.

TOKEN: Why do you say that?

DAMIEN: Demons, and all subsidiaries, only punish the deserving.

DAMIEN: They don’t generally just… go around killing for no reason.

TOKEN: But… Jimmy…

DAMIEN: Maybe Jimmy was an asshole.

DAMIEN: Maybe Jimmy had it coming.

DAMIEN: You don’t know.

TOKEN: I– I think I do.

TOKEN: He was one of my best friends.

TOKEN: And he had his face eaten off.

DAMIEN: Look.

DAMIEN: I think unrepentant sinners are more likely than a bunch of rogue demons running amok for no reason. 

TOKEN: But–

DAMIEN: Okay, let’s say they are killing for no reason.

DAMIEN: Let’s say they’re killing and rampaging and possessing anybody they see.

DAMIEN: In the end, it’s all your guy’s faults.

DAMIEN: You let a bad one out.

DAMIEN: If you didn’t want anything bad to happen, maybe you shouldn’t have used a ouija board.

DAMIEN: You went against every warning there was, got high, and played with a toy that lets you talk to any hellspawn that happens across it.

TOKEN: But…

TOKEN: Is there any way we’d be able to… undo something like this?

DAMIEN: I mean sure, if you had a favor or two. But good luck with that.

TOKEN: A favor with who?

DAMIEN: The Ruler of Hell, stupid.

DAMIEN: The guy who runs all of those little shits.

TOKEN: Well…

TOKEN: You– you said you were the son of Satan, right?

TOKEN: Is there any way I’d be able to get a favor from…

DAMIEN: Yeah, okay, good luck trying to get a favor with the guy who literally runs the underworld.

DAMIEN: I bet you don’t even know how to find him.

TOKEN: N–

DAMIEN: Look, like I said, I gotta be somewhere.

DAMIEN: Enjoy the rest of your drink.

DAMIEN: If you really need me, call me when I’m not working.

TOKEN: …

[zatxrn]

@hellpark this is the first thing i make on this lord’s first day of pride month im so sorry

[zatxrn]

CRAIG: So…

CRAIG: If… if I tell you where Stan is…

CRAIG: You’ll let me go…?

GREGORY: Craig, I will always stay true to my word.

GREGORY: You give me what I want, and I’ll have no qualms with you.

CRAIG: I mean, I’m not exactly… like…

CRAIG: Best friends with him or anything…

GREGORY: Friends enough to have him over at your house last night.

CRAIG: …

CRAIG: The last time I saw him, he was still at school…

CRAIG: Um…

CRAIG: School might be out, I don’t know.

CRAIG: If he’s anywhere besides there, it’s probably at his house or Cartman’s–

GREGORY: Thank you, Craig.

GREGORY: That’s all I wanted to know.

CRAIG: I mean, like, simple process of elimination would have led you to him anyways, so…

CRAIG: W…wait…

CRAIG: What are you gonna do to him…?

GREGORY: Nothing that concerns you, Craig.

CRAIG: Wait. N-no no no…

THOMAS: He shouldn’t have any reason to do anything to him…

THOMAS: I think?

CLYDE: [sniffle sniffle]

CLYDE: I just really have to pee, bro…

CRAIG: D… don’t…

CRAIG: Fuck…

THOMAS: Hey dude– it’ll– it’ll be okay…

CRAIG: What the hell is your problem.

THOMAS: Wh…

TOKEN: Okay… okay dude.

TOKEN: Just be quick.

TOKEN: I don’t feel safe just standing around right now…

CLYDE: Please come with meeeee…

CLYDE: I’m scared if I go alone I’ll– I’ll just.

CLYDE: I dunno, what if I just randomly die and you don’t even know about it?

TOKEN: Dude, I’m not gonna go into the bathroom with you.

CRAIG: Jimmy is dead because of you assholes!

THOMAS: It wasn’t me!!!

CRAIG: It was your group!

THOMAS: FUCK– SHIT– I didn’t think we were gonna kill anybody!

TWEEK: Chill the fuck out, man!!

CRAIG: Why are you guys even… 

CRAIG: I can’t…

CRAIG: I j… just…

CLYDE: How am I supposed to pee alone when there’s fucking demons out there, bro?!

CLYDE: They killed Jimmy when we weren’t looking!

CLYDE: Craig might be dead, too!

CLYDE: I don’t wanna be next…

TOKEN: Dude, okay, just.

TOKEN: Calm down.

TOKEN: If another demon shows up, we get right back into my car.

TOKEN: I am not going to let a demon kill another one of my friends.

???: Hey okay.

???: What.

CRAIG: I’m…

CRAIG: I’m not supposed to cry.

CRAIG: I’m supposed to be the one who doesn’t care about anything.

CRAIG: Why am I crying…

THOMAS: L-look… dude…

CRAIG: N-no, shut up!

CRAIG: I’m so… stupid…

CLYDE: Who…

CLYDE: Oh…

CLYDE: (Token it’s the weird foreign kid.)

CLYDE: (Why is he looking at us.)

TOKEN: (Dude I don’t know.)

TOKEN: Um… what?

???: What do you know about demons?

TOKEN: …Well what do you know about demons?

CRAIG: J-just go away…!

CRAIG: This is all my fault, I don’t need you two freaks standing around me reminding me!

THOMAS: ):

TWEEK: ):

DAMIEN: bitch,

DAMIEN: I know a lot about demons.

[zatxrn]

CLYDE: WWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHWHWHAWHAA!!!

CLYDE: TOKEN OH MY GOD OH MY GOD WE LEFT CRAIG BEHINDDDD!!!

TOKEN: I know dude, I know!

CLYDE: WHY DID WE LEAVE HIM BEHINNNNNNNNNNNNNNDDDD?!

TOKEN: IF WE STAYED THERE WE WOULD HAVE GOTTEN KILLED TOO!

CLYDE: OH GOD CRAIG IS DEAD ISN’T HE?

CLYDE: OH MY GOD AND SO IS JIMMY!

CLYDE: YOU SAW HIM HE DIDN’T HAVE A FACE OH MY GOD OH MY GOD–

TOKEN: I KNOW DUDE!

CLYDE: WHERE ARE WE EVEN GOING?!

TOKEN: DUDE HAVE YOU NOT BEEN LISTENING TO ME THIS WHOLE TIME???

CLYDE: I’VE BEEN CRYINGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHHHHH!!!

TOKEN: Dude I can’t focus when you’re this loud!

CLYDE: WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWHHHH…!

Meanwhile…

THOMAS: HAOUGUUGUGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

TWEEK: Why are you even here, man?!

TWEEK: Why are any of you here!

THOMAS: Huuuuuu……uuUHHHOUUUUGHHGHHFGGH–

PIP: Gregory, would you be so kind as to get rid of this rain?

PIP: I’m getting quite soaked…

TWEEK: RAIN?!

TWEEK: IS THAT WHAT YOU’RE WORRIED ABOUT RIGHT NOW MAN??? HHH???

GREGORY: Oh for the LOVE of–

GREGORY: Shut up– everybody shut up!

GREGORY: Thomas, my word, stop vomiting everywhere.

THOMAS: Buuuuh…

GREGORY: Pip, stop messing with that body!

PIP: I’m just looking…!

TWEEK: HOW CAN I SHUT UP???

TWEEK: LOOK AT WHAT YOU’VE DONE!

GREGORY: I swear–

GREGORY: Don’t touch me.

GREGORY: Eugh.

TWEEK: Hgg! What are you going to do to him!

GREGORY: Him?

GREGORY: …

GREGORY: Is he really even worth doing anything to?

TWEEK: That’s what I’m saying man–

GREGORY: Quiet! The more you talk the more I’m tempted to spite you.

TWEEK: Hhh…

CRAIG: What are you guys even doing…

CRAIG: Why are you here???

CRAIG: What do you even want with me?

GREGORY: Nothing, really.

GREGORY: You’re so afraid, for really no reason at all.

GREGORY: None of us are bad people, Craig.

GREGORY: But that’s exactly how you’re acting right now.

CRAIG: …You guys… killed Jimmy.

GREGORY: That was a… miscalculation.

PIP: No, I apologize, I was just a bit peckish, that’s all!

GREGORY: …

CRAIG: Is this…

CRAIG: Is this because we played that game… With the board…

GREGORY: Oh finally, you get it.

GREGORY: It took a whole song and dance number for you to understand.

GREGORY: You’re the bad one here, Craig.

CRAIG: But I didn’t even–

GREGORY: Mmm. But you *did* even, Craig.

GREGORY: Look, friend.

GREGORY: We all have our reasons to be here right now.

GREGORY: Honestly, if it weren’t for me bringing everyone here, you wouldn’t even know how much you’ve messed up.

GREGORY: I expect only gratitude from you, really.

GREGORY: But I know you won’t give me that.

GREGORY: Something I do expect you to give me, however…

GREGORY: Where’s your old friend, might I ask?

CRAIG: Wh–

GREGORY: I’d have no issue prying it out of you, Craig.

GREGORY: You and I have no history.

GREGORY: No chemistry at all.

GREGORY: There is nothing here that keeps me from doing anything I want to you.

GREGORY: But there’s also nothing that you’ve done that would make me want to hurt you.

GREGORY: …Yet.

GREGORY: Don’t give me a reason.

GREGORY: Just tell me where he is.

CRAIG: God damn can you let me speak?

CRAIG: Who are you even talking about?

GREGORY: You know who I’m talking about.

CRAIG: I really don’t.

CRAIG: Stop being so cryptic, dude…

GREGORY: …

GREGORY: Stan Marsh.

GREGORY: Where is he.

[zatxrn]

[zatxrn]

CRAIG: Stop looking at me!

TOKEN: Dude, you’re freaking out!

CLYDE: We just wanna help…

CRAIG: If you want to help then just listen!!!!

TOKEN: Dude, we are listening.

TOKEN: You just keep telling us to shut up!

???: Look at you all.

???: Squawking and floundering about…

CLYDE: Wh–

???: You’ve spent all of this time stressing out over your own mistakes.

???: And you barely even know what you did.

TOKEN: Who…

TOKEN: Who does that sound like. I know that voice.

CLYDE: Are we gonna get murdered…?

CLYDE: I don’t wanna die…

???: Ohohoh, that’s rich.

???: You really think you’re the center of all of this?

???: You really think we’re here to kill you?

???: Well… I’m not here for that, at least.

???: Not for you, anyway.

???: You’ve created a problem far beyond your control.

CLYDE: Dude…

CLYDE: Dude is that…

???: Tweek, dear.

???: What are you doing?

???: Why are you trying to befriend them?

TWEEK: G… go away…

???: Oh…

???: Oh, this is so cute…

???: Is that why you came through first?

???: You just wanted friends?

TWEEK: N–

???: Well I’m sorry, some of us are here for a much greater reason.

???: It’s time to stop hiding.

[zatxrn]

TOKEN: So… Tweek.

TOKEN: Like… I really don’t wanna make things weird on your first day…

TWEEK: I MEAN!

TWEEK: Isn’t think already kind of weird?????? Hhh?????????

TOKEN: Yeah but, like.

TOKEN: Okay so, earlier today Craig was all paranoid, which totally isn’t like him.

TOKEN: And he was talking about how you were a demon and of course, I thought that was stupid.

TWEEK: It IS stupid, man!

TOKEN: Yeah man, for sure.

TOKEN: But…

TOKEN: After we saw… I mean…

TOKEN: After what we saw, I’m kinda having weird conflicting thoughts.

TWEEK: Wh… what are you saying, man?

TOKEN: Well…

TOKEN: Are you?

CLYDE: Aw man, please don’t be a demon, dude.

CLYDE: You’re like, really cool.

CLYDE: Or is it okay to be a demon if you’re cool?

CLYDE: Haha h ha h I mean I wouldn’t mind if you’re a demon, as long as you don’t, like, kill me or anything.

TWEEK: I’m–

TWEEK: I’m not a demon, j-jesus christ!

TOKEN: I didn’t say you were, I just–

TWEEK: You obviously thought it!

TWEEK: Why are you guys ganging up on me, I don’t even know you!

CLYDE: We’re not trying to be mean, bro! Trust me!

TOKEN: Craig’s acting weird, you’re new here, and we just saw a demon!

TOKEN: Can’t you see why we’d be at least a little skeptical???

TWEEK: No, man!

TWEEK: I saw the same shit as you did, and I ran away from the same shit as you did!

TWEEK: Don’t fucking freak me out this!!! HhhgfhjfhhgjhgfhjfgjfhjhH!!!!

TOKEN: Okay, okay, it’s okay

CRAIG: (why is my mouth moving…)

CRAIG: (i’m not talking.)

TOKEN: I just wanna make sure we’re all safe, okay?

CLYDE: I’ve only known you for a few hours, bro, and I already think you’re cool.

CLYDE: I wouldn’t care if you were a demon, I promise!

TWEEK: WELL GOOD, CAUSE I’M NOT!!

TOKEN: Clyde, come on, I think he’s had enough.

CLYDE: I know, I’m sorry.

TWEEK: HHhhgghfhjHJHGHGHHH

TOKEN: Let’s all just calm down, okay?

TWEEK: How can I calm down when I’m in the middle of a place I don’t know, drenched in the middle of a fucking storm!

TWEEK: AFTER THAT GUY AT SCHOOL JUST APPEARED???

TOKEN: We can talk it out, it’ll be okay!–

CLYDE: Yeah man, we’re in this together, right?

CLYDE: And hypothetically, if you were a demon, not saying you are bro, it’d–

CRAIG: UUUUUUGHHHHHHHH!!!

CRAIG: SHUT UP!

CRAIG: CAN ALL OF YOU JUST SHUT UP?!

CRAIG: JESUS CHRIST!!!

TOKEN: Craig???

TOKEN: Dude, we weren’t even talking that loud.

CRAIG: Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

CLYDE: Yo man… are you gonna be okay?

CLYDE: Craig, bro?

CLYDE: Dawg?

CLYDE: Broseph?

TOKEN: Clyde.

CRAIG: Everything is… it’s… so loud…

TOKEN: Are you, like.

TOKEN: Having a panic attack or s–

CRAIG: Oh god.

CRAIG: Oh god we’re not alone.

CRAIG: We’re still not alone.

CLYDE: You’re freaking me out, dude, you’re not like this.

CRAIG: We’re not alone and there’s someone right behind us.

[zatxrn]

CLYDE: HHUHHHUHUHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

CLYDE: [WHEEZE]

CLYDE: OH GOD I’M SO… STILL SORRY… AND… SO OUT OF… BREATH…

TOKEN: I’m just…

TOKEN: …I… Was that even real?

TOKEN: Did the school put something weird in our food again?

CLYDE: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIII DON’T KNOW BRO… WWHHHHHHHJHJHJHJHGJF………………….

TWEEK: Are– are you going to be okay, man?

CLYDE: YEAH… yeah…

CRAIG: …

TWEEK: Is Craig okay???

TWEEK: What’s wrong with him?????

TOKEN: I don’t know, really?

TOKEN: Sometimes he locks up under stress, but like…

TOKEN: Never like this, you know?

TWEEK: DID HE GET POSSESSED???

TOKEN: What?

TOKEN: No, dude.

TOKEN: He’s probably just shaken up.

TOKEN: I know I am.

CRAIG: Ugh, guys, stop talking about me.

CRAIG: I’m trying to think…

TOKEN: Dude, is right now really the best time for thinking?

CRAIG: That sentence was so stupid, shut up.

TOKEN: …Fair enough.

TOKEN: …Well… where should we go?

CLYDE: Are we still going to Craig’s house…?

TOKEN: I guess we could?

CRAIG: Oh my god.

CRAIG: We’re not going to my place.

CRAIG: Did you not hear what the guy said back there?

TOKEN: The guy? Which guy?

CRAIG: You know…

CRAIG: Uhhh… uggggh.

CRAIG: Pap or whatever his name was.

CRAIG: I don’t fucking know, man.

CRAIG: I…

CRAIG: Just shut up.

TOKEN: I didn’t say anything.

CRAIG: We’re going to Stark’s Pond.

TOKEN: In the rain, dude?

CRAIG: Yes in the rain, now stop talking to me.

TOKEN: Alright, dude… alright…

CLYDE: Have you ever been to Stark’s Pond, Tweek?

TWEEK: Uh… no???

TWEEK: I’ve only been here for a day.

TOKEN: You started school the same day you moved here?

TWEEK: Yes?

TOKEN: Huh.

CLYDE: …

CLYDE: Where do you live?

CLYDE: I don’t remember there being any house for sale around here.

TWEEK: Just outside of town.

CLYDE: That’s cool.

TWEEK: …Yeah.

TOKEN: …

CRAIG: …

TWEEK: …

CLYDE: …

CLYDE: WOW!

CLYDE: This is boring!

CLYDE: Maybe I’ll just see you guys later–

TOKEN: I dunno if right now is the best time to split up, Clyde.

TOKEN: We all saw what happened back there.

CLYDE: ):

CRAIG: I think I need to sit down.

TOKEN: Dude, seriously, are you gonna be okay?

CRAIG: …

TOKEN: [sigh]

TOKEN: Have you ever seen Craig like this before, Clyde?

CLYDE: If you haven’t, I haven’t, dude.

TWEEK: Is he sick?

TWEEK: I don’t wanna get sick on my first day here, man!

TOKEN: No, I don’t think he’s sick.

TOKEN: I think something’s bothering him.

CLYDE: Well yeah, didn’t Pip say he like, summoned a portal to hell in his own bedroom or something?

TOKEN: Dude, how could Craig have done that? He’s Craig.

CLYDE: Maybe… maybe he did something with the ouija board.

CLYDE: You know how creepy it was getting last night.

TOKEN: Ouija boards aren’t that dangerous, dude.

TOKEN: And we were using it the right way, there’s no way he could have done something like that…

CLYDE: I dunno man…

CLYDE: We all left after things got weird…

TOKEN: …

[zatxrn]

PIP: Oh, it’s just so lovely to see you all!

PIP: Where are all of the others?

PIP: I’d love to have one great big reunion!

PIP: Though it could hardly be called a reunion, now would it?

PIP: I’d be the only one returning!

PIP: Or, wait, no…

PIP: There are others that would love to see you all, I’m sure of it!

PIP: I’m sure they’re already here, and you barely know it!

PIP: Thanks to you and your curiosity, you’ve let open a portal from hell, right in your very own bedroom!

PIP: Isn’t that just splendid?

PIP: Everybody who wants to come and see you simply just… can now!

PIP: Oh, I’m sure you all know this already, I’m just so excited I can’t stop myself from talking!

PIP: And I’m sure you’re excited too now, aren’t you all?

PIP: Oh, and you can finally apologize for all of the terrible, terrible things you’ve done to me as a child!

PIP: And I’m here to say, my fellow friend, I would wholeheartedly accept!

PIP: There’s no need to ramble on, either.

PIP: Just a simple apology I believe is in order.

CRAIG: Uh…

PIP: Don’t be shy now, there’s no need to hesitate!!!

PIP: You and all of your friends are sorry, are you not?

CRAIG: Uhhhhhh…

PIP: You can take your time.

PIP: Or if you think I don’t deserve it, that’s fine too!!!

PIP: It’s okay if you’re not sorry.

PIP: I still forgive you.

PIP: Or maybe you forgot me, too?

PIP: Don’t worry about that either, old friend!

PIP: I’m used to people forgetting about me!

CRAIG: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

PIP: Oh, I know this must be quite jarring, but really, everything is fine!

PIP: I’m not here to hurt any of you!

PIP: And that comes straight from my heart, it does.

PIP: I could do so many unimaginable things to you all now, but I would never have it in my heart to do so!

TOKEN: Okay, um, you know what, I’m gonna take some initiative here and–

CLYDE: AAAAAAAAAAAAAA I’M SORRY I’M SORRY I MEAN IT I’M SORRY FOR ALL THE MEAN THINGS I DIDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!

TOKEN: Dude, Craig, do you mind actually running with us?!

CRAIG: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

TOKEN: Oh my god, dude, come on!

[zatxrn]

CRAIG: [snort]

CRAIG: These guys actually think we should go and check out the rest of the school.

CRAIG: What do they expect us to see?

CRAIG: A fucking ghost or something?

INTERCOM:  ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╧ ╧ ╧ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╧ ╬ ╬

TOKEN: Haven’t you been going on about demons like, all day, dude?

CRAIG: Yeah okay but for real though.

TOKEN: I thought you were being real–

CRAIG: No shut up.

TOKEN: Well…

TOKEN: I still think it’d be a good idea to go and check what’s going on?

TOKEN: Some teacher, or someone… should have came over by now.

INTERCOM:  ╬ ╬ ■ ╒ ╬ ╬╬ ╧  ■ ╧  ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╧ ╒ ╒ ╒ ╒ ╬ ■ ■ ╬

CRAIG: Ugh.

CRAIG: I guess?

CRAIG: Do we have to?

INTERCOM:  ╬ ╬ ╬ ■ ╬ ■ ╧ ╬ ■ ╬ ■ ╬ ╧ ■ ╧  ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╧ ╧ ╬ ■ ╬ ■ ╬ ╒ ╒ ╒

TOKEN: I mean, maybe we can figure out why the speakers are freaking out so much.

CRAIG: Mmmmmmm…

CRAIG: Fine…

CRAIG: Okay, great, this is a shocker.

CRAIG: Who would have guessed we’d see nothing but pitch black nothingness.

TOKEN: It’s so dark out…

TOKEN: How bad is this storm gonna get?

CRAIG: Man, I don’t know.

CRAIG: I’m not a weather channel, dude.

CLYDE: Hey, hey Craig.

CLYDE: If we go home early today, we should hang out at your place.

CRAIG: If it’s gonna end up like last night, I’d rather not.

CLYDE: What???

CLYDE: Why not, I thought it was fun!!

CRAIG: Eh.

TOKEN: I think Craig’s just scared of summoning another “demon.”

CRAIG: Yeah, okay, whatever you say.

CLYDE: Oh hey, speaking of–

CLYDE: Hey Tweek, I still don’t think you’re a demon or anything.

CLYDE: You should hang out with us more.

CLYDE: OH MY GOD YOU SHOULD COME OVER TO CRAIG’S WITH US TODAY.

CRAIG: Okay cool I guess we’re all just inviting ourselves to my house now.

TWEEK: What!!!

TWEEK: You guys hate me though!

TWEEK: In fact, I should– I should just go!!

CLYDE: Wait, no, dude!

CLYDE: Where did you get that idea, bro?

TOKEN: If you’re talking about Craig, he’s just a weirdo.

TOKEN: Especially today.

TOKEN: Don’t worry, you’ll get used to him.

TOKEN: Or… he’ll get used to you.

TWEEK: Hhhhh…

TOKEN: We can all chill and play something casual tonight.

CRAIG: Literally, I never said you guys could come over.

CLYDE: Yeah, but we’re gonna anyways bro, so you might as well just accept it.

TWEEK: I don’t like how dark and quiet everything is…!

TWEEK: Why are we going this way again???

CRAIG: We never said you had to come, dude.

TWEEK: No I know, but…

INTERCOM: Tally-ho there, old friends!

CRAIG: 

TOKEN: …

TOKEN: Is…

TOKEN: Is that…

PIP: It is indeed!

PIP: Been quite a while since I’ve seen all of you, hasn’t it!

CLYDE: Dude…

CLYDE: Dude we thought you, like, died!

TOKEN: Yeah, like…

TOKEN: YEARS ago…

PIP: And you’d be correct, ol’ chaps!

TOKEN: Wait, are you okay?

CLYDE: DUDE did you do the thing where, like, you died and someone brought you back to life like REALLY SOON AFTER and then maybe you moved away or something for a long time or like–

PIP: Oh, no need for any concern, trust me!

PIP: None of that happened, none at all.

PIP: You see, a lot has happened in the years that I’ve been gone!

PIP: I see a lot has happened for you lot as well.

PIP: But for me…

PIP: ╬Years in hell can do a number on you, it can! ╬

[zatxrn]

CRAIG: …I don’t really know.

CRAIG: I mean, if it was a dream, it’s probably just a coincidence.

CRAIG: And normally I’d stop caring by now.

CRAIG: But… I just get a weird vibe from him.

CRAIG: I dunno how.

CRAIG: They both look similar… with the hair and the clothes, I guess.

CRAIG: But… he doesn’t seem… demonic or anything…

CRAIG: I mean, he’s so jumpy and twitchy and anxious.

CRAIG: The demon guy I saw was like… not.

CRAIG: Or maybe he was, I don’t know.

CRAIG: I was too busy focusing on the fact that there was a random ass demon in my dream to tell if he was a little jumpy.

CRAIG: Was it a dream?

CRAIG: Ugh, I haven’t thought this hard in my life.

CRAIG: Yeah, I guess so.

CRAIG: It’s not like I’m gonna lose anything by asking…

CRAIG: …

CRAIG: Hey, uh…

CRAIG: Tweek?

CRAIG: Is that your name?

TWEEK: Yes!!

TWEEK: What?

TWEEK: What’s wrong?

CRAIG: Nothing, nothing…

CRAIG: Just, like…

CRAIG: I was wondering something.

TWEEK: W…what?

CRAIG: Are you a demon or something?

TWEEK: A WHAT?!

CLYDE: A demon???

TWEEK: HHHHJ H?? ???

TOKEN: Whoa, Craig, just right off the bat?

TWEEK: OH GOD AM I BEING THAT WEIRD???

TWEEK: I knew it was a mistake sitting over here!

TWEEK: No wonder everybody was looking at me weird–

TWEEK: You must all think I’m some sort of FREAK or somethingghffhghhhfdh–

CLYDE: Hey, hey, Tweek, it’s okay!

TWEEK: HHHGFHJHJFHJGDGD? ??? 

CLYDE: Craig, look– Tweek’s cool!

CLYDE: He’s a little jumpy and funny, but he and I were just having a heartfelt conversation about what kind of anime he likes to watch.

CLYDE: Demons hate anime!

CLYDE: Trust me bro, I know!

CRAIG: Uhuh…

CRAIG: Did he contribute to this conversation at all, or did you just talk about the anime you like.

CLYDE: I mean I had to warm him up, he’s a little shy, but–

TWEEK: (oh god oh god oh god…?>?!!?>?)

CLYDE: Did the power just go out?

TWEEK: Agh! It’s been storming all day, the wind probably knocked something over!!!

TOKEN: Does this mean we get to go home early?

CRAIG: How did the weather get so bad so quickly?

TOKEN: Hey yeah, wasn’t it supposed to just be kinda cloudy today?

CRAIG: What, did you check the weather or something?

CRAIG: God you’re so boring Token.

TOKEN: Wow, okay, you’re one to talk–

INTERCOM:  �� ╒ ╬ ╬ ╬ ■ ■ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╧ ╧ ╬ ╬ ╒ ╬╬ ╬ ╬ ╧ ╧ ╬ ■ ╬ ■ ╬ ╒ ╬ ╬ ╬ 

TWEEK: Oh god what is that?! WHAT IS THAT??!!?!

CRAIG: It’s the intercom, dude.

CRAIG: Chill.

TOKEN: Wait, how is the intercom working if the power is out?

CLYDE: Maybe they have a generator?

CRAIG: If they have a back up generator, why would they turn on the intercoms first, idiot.

CRAIG: How would they turn on only the intercoms.

CLYDE: I dunno dude!

INTERCOM:  ╬ ■ ╬ ╒ ╬ ╬ ╒ ╬╬ ╬ ╬O ╬ ■ ■ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╧ ╧ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬TT ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ HH╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ L╬ ╬ ╬ A╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╧ ╧ ╬ ╬

TWEEK: WHAT DO WE DO?!?!

TOKEN: Dude, it’ll be okay.

TOKEN: Haven’t you ever been in a power outage before?

TWEEK: I DON’T KNOW!!!!H!H!HHHJHHJ!!!!!!

INTERCOM: ╬ ╬ ╬ T╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ AA╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ LL╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬L  ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬Y ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ HH╬ ╬ ╬ ╬ ╬O╬ !╬ !

[zatxrn]

TOKEN: So what exactly about him freaked you out, dude?

TOKEN: It’s not like you to be scared of like…

TOKEN: Anything.

CRAIG: Okay like, maybe freaked out wasn’t the best way to put it.

CRAIG: But there’s something weird about him…

TOKEN: What do you mean?

TOKEN: I noticed he was kinda twitchy the whole class.

CRAIG: Yeah, but he was only in your first period, dude.

CRAIG: So far, he’s been in every single class of mine.

TOKEN: Dang dude, all three?

CRAIG: Yeah.

TOKEN: Maybe it’s just a weird coincidence.

CRAIG: Like, sure.

CRAIG: I could get behind that idea, but like…

CRAIG: He looks familiar.

TOKEN: Familiar?

TOKEN: He’s the weirdest looking guy I’ve seen here in a while.

TOKEN: Have you seen him before or something?

CRAIG: …I dunno…

CRAIG: Maybe?

TOKEN: What do you mean “maybe?”

CRAIG: Well, like, you know how I had that dream about a demon or a ghost or whatever?

TOKEN: Uhh, yeah?

CRAIG: He kinda, like.

CRAIG: I dunno.

CRAIG: He kinda reminded me of…–

???: …Hey.

CRAIG: …?

CRAIG: Oh. It’s you again.

TWEEK: Yeah.

TWEEK: Hey.

TWEEK: Um.

TWEEK: I just…

TWEEK: I wanted to apologize!!!

TWEEK: I probably came off as rude or something, earlier…

TWEEK: I just get nervous when people stare at me!

TWEEK: I think they hate me, or, or

TWEEK: I don’t know, maybe they wanna beat the shit out of me–

TWEEK: I’m new here, man, I don’t wanna get into a fight on my first day, hgghghgh!!!

TWEEK: I’m just saying sorry because I don’t want any beef or anything!

TWEEK: And everybody is avoiding me too, probably because I’m fucking weird, I don’t know!

TWEEK: I was wondering if I could sit with you guys because, hhh…

TWEEK: I don’t know!

TWEEK: You’re the only one I’ve talked to so far…

CRAIG: 

TWEEK: Oh god I’m sorry I’m–

CRAIG: Dude I can’t think that fast, give me a fucking second to process everything you just said.

TWEEK: Oh god I’m just rambling all over the place again aren’t I???

TWEEK: Fuck, I’m so fucking sorry–

CRAIG: Dude, chill.

CRAIG: …

CRAIG: [sigh]

CRAIG: Okay, whatever.

CRAIG: Just like. Sit… not next to me.

CRAIG: Sit next to Clyde, or something…

TWEEK: Hhhhh, o… okay…

[zatxrn]

TEACHER: Why don’t you go take a seat over there next to Craig, and we can get started on today’s lesson!

TWEEK: Hhh, okay…!

CRAIG: …

CRAIG: …………………..

TWEEK: ???

CRAIG:

TWEEK: Are you staring at me…?

CRAIG: No.

TWEEK: Why are you staring at me?

TWEEK: Do I look funny?

TWEEK: Is there something on my face?

TWEEK: Oh god, I must look so stupid–

CRAIG: Uh, no…

CRAIG: You’re just…

CRAIG: Nevermind.

TWEEK: What do you mean I’m “just…” ???

CRAIG: Dude, nothing.

CRAIG: (He’s gonna be so annoying, I can already tell.)

TWEEK: What???

CRAIG: I said nothing.

TWEEK: Agh, why won’t you stop staring at me then?!

TWEEK: I don’t want any trouble, man.

TWEEK: Just mind your own business!

CRAIG: …

CRAIG: O…okay.

[zatxrn]

CRAIG: Hey.

TOKEN: Oh hey dude.

CLYDE: DUDE YOU’RE ALIVE!

CRAIG: Yep.

TOKEN: So how did the rest of your night go?

CRAIG: Eh.

CRAIG: I think I passed out like, right after you guys left.

CRAIG: I set up a camera and I think I played a little more of that game, but I’m kinda blanking it past that part.

CRAIG: I had a crazy dream though.

CLYDE: Oh TELL IT, bro!

TOKEN: Was it a scary dream?

CRAIG: …I don’t really know.

CRAIG: It was, like… weird.

CRAIG: So in my dream, I was totally playing with the ouija board some more.

CLYDE: Dude I totally had to change my pants when I got home after that, by the way.

CRAIG: Yeah, I know.

CRAIG:

CLYDE:

CRAIG: Anyway.

CRAIG: I was playing it, and I ended up talking to this guy.

CRAIG: I guess it was a demon or something.

CRAIG: I dunno.

CRAIG: I talked, and eventually there was like, a knock at my window.

CRAIG: I checked it out, and then I turned around, and there was just a demon, standing there.

TOKEN: That’s pretty scary, dude.

KENNY: …What did it do?

CRAIG: It, like. Had that thing you move around the board.

CRAIG: It was holding that thing.

CRAIG: It was speaking gibberish for a bit, but then it snapped that thing in half, and told me some weird cryptic shit.

TOKEN: Damn, dude.

TOKEN: You sure you didn’t actually get haunted?

CRAIG: Nah.

CRAIG: I woke up this morning and there wasn’t shit.

CRAIG: The camera I set up didn’t even have a card in it.

CRAIG: I didn’t even have time to watch the playback on it, but I’m pretty sure it was just 99% me sleeping.

CRAIG: So I shut it off and left.

TOKEN: Dang.

CRAIG: Eh.

TOKEN: If it helps you at all, I dreamt about pirates.

CRAIG: Didn’t really need help, but thanks for telling me anyways I guess.

TEACHER: Okay class!

TEACHER: I hope you’ve gotten your morning questions all answered.

TEACHER: I’ll grab them from your desks in a moment, and then we can all start today’s lesson.

TEACHER: But first, I’d like to say that you all have a new student joining the classroom!

TEACHER: This is pretty exciting, we don’t get too many new visitors in this town, now do we?

TEACHER: Come on in, young man.

TEACHER: I’d like you all to meet your new classmate, and hopefully, new friend…

TEACHER: …Go on, tell them your name, dear.

???: …

TWEEK: T…Tweek!

TWEEK: My name is Tweek!