aamitmorthos

[aamitmorthos]

the interesting thing about avpd is you look mostly normal to others because youre desperately avoiding any triggers so you dont usually have freak outs

instead you look aloof and rude and not worth peoples time because you dont give back. like idk, i talk to people and listen because i care about friends. but so much of what i say is filtered through fear and lost. and im dissasociative and autistic so how im percieved and why people leave or give up on us is completely unknown to me.

like im constantly grasping at connections and reality but they slip away and im left wondering why i cant be loved or kept around

idk, im sorry i miss birthdays and never show affection its not because i dont care its because im extremely mentally ill. i liked being friends with you

#avpd #mh #drhs r xlfow vhxzkv

[aamitmorthos]

#drhs r xlfow vhxzkv

[aamitmorthos]

the social avoidant cycle. i feel deep, unsettling, painful loneliness. -> i will go make friends! i cannot sit idly by in my life and pretend to be okay with this isolation -> i socially overexert myself in hopes of making connections, any at all -> the connections end up being superficial at best, often only hypothetical and contextual, rarely reaching the mere acquaintanceship stage -> i drift away into irrelevance in the social sphere until i can make a clean cut -> i sit by myself, for who knows how long -> i feel a deep, unsettling, painful loneliness -> and so i do it again

#mh #avpd #drhs r xlfow vhxzkv

[aamitmorthos]

[aamitmorthos]

[aamitmorthos]

cozy plant bedroom

#drhs r xlfow vhxzkv

[aamitmorthos]

So...opinion on trainfucking?

Unlike some cowards on this site -AHEM Amtrak-, we highly encourage trainfucking. In fact, it's weirder if you DON'T want to fuck the train, seriously, who wouldn't want a piece of this?

[aamitmorthos]

[aamitmorthos]

Beef Chow Mein (x)

[aamitmorthos]

Drinking water with dedication

[aamitmorthos]

#on her way to getting that raise

[aamitmorthos]

[aamitmorthos]

[aamitmorthos]

[aamitmorthos]

[aamitmorthos]

[aamitmorthos]