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#FANTASTIC! ‘VERSE #i saw this post laughed scrolled by and then saw meghan’s tag of ‘need a love like this’ and that apparently triggered the brainworms 😭 #also very very briefly. shoutout to the customer service person on venmo who did me the best solid i love you so much bro. you’re amazing #anyway. this is very much isaac-coded to me except he turns out to be in-laws with joel so he doesn’t get rid of him 😭 #joel intentionally always going to morgan’s checkout lane even though morgan is objectively terrible on register & isaac is so much faster #but it’s basically like cheating to go to isaac’s register so joel only does it on days morgan has off 😭 they’ll never tell morgan he’s bad

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i just saw two boys riding an electric skateboard together holding each other so tenderly i think love is real

#fantastic! ‘verse #electric scooter but you know. based on a real life experience with a man in a cheetah print shirt so #not hockey hockey they’re all joel farabee it’s always beezer just joelle all the way down #this is the electric scooter post btw but i wrote the scooter scene before i ever saw this 🫡 #also these lines hit SO insanely hard like??? #it is spring you know. and we are alive. #like yeah!! it is spring!!! we’re alive!!! nothing like the cool air on your face as someone ferries you down the street laughing speeding #you pick me up and take me home again head out the window again ​a first kiss ‘good?’ ‘fantastic’

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#if i did not have the most elaborate and useless backstory for two seconds in a sequel i would 1000% make joel get this tattoo in #fantastic! ‘verse #not hockey hockey it’s all joelle it’s always joel it’s joelle farabeezer all the way down #oh my god. i’m an idiot. make him get one that’s fantastic in morgan’s handwriting shut UP OH MY GOD it’s got to go somewhere he can look at #or somewhere stupid and meaningful like over his heart & ok maybe it’s not permanent maybe joel just gets morgan to draw on him with sharpie #the way that they draw on isaac but he doodles in the same spot at where joel eventually gets his bee seals it with a kiss joel’s writing #w/one hand morgan’s fidgeting w/the other & doodling as HE takes notes & watches a lecture video i’m going to throw up boyfriends in love #morgan writing this on a sarcastic little note and holding it up to joel while they’ve both got their headphones in at a cafe studying & it #is like every bad teen movie ever ok the falling in love movie montage part where joel & morgan’s feet knock together under the table as #they become friends this is pre-scooter ride or post-scooter ride also have to say that i have been reading this to the tune of sarah and #the sundays’ ‘i’m so bored’ this entire time & like. yeah that is actually the movie montage song i hate it here thanks brain the upbeat 😤😤 #deep cuts from the draft dumpster dives #burying this deep in the tags and also yes i will post the scooter ride post after this but. in honor of me gr*****ing today i’m posting a #bunch of fantastic! ‘verse things because four?? three??? years ago i lied and said i would finish it by the time this day rolls around #and uh. guess who did not lmao. anyway i will be intensely romanticizing their experiences because I want to #and also because joel got a new tattoo this season and i want to give him MY terrible tattoo ideas. I would not get this in 10000 years but #I think he should get it in morgan’s handwriting as a little doodle piece the same way isaac has his doodle giraffe. #no bad days you’re so cool the james bible quote joel actually has that always makes me cry bc i misremember it & it’s about trying hard #like the isaac/joel aesthetic is so similar & i love that for them (also it’s the he who perserveres quote James 1:12 &to be on the FLYERS)

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#and i- #everybody close your eyes to this next tag because the fic DOES NOT EXIST and WILL NOT do not get any hopes up like. ever. but. #me when i was struggling to figure out what color hair brandon’s baby (of the wishbaby twins) would have that was subtly dewey2 coded #and i was slightly unhinged googling baby photos to see if he was a blond baby who go darker because i felt it in my soul &didn’t know why? #YEAH THAT BABY IS GONNA BE GINGERRRRR beautiful wispy ginger brown hair and brandon is going to be the world’s proudest dad when he goes #‘her hair looks red in the right light sometimes’ and he’s talking to his teammates connor’s not even there MAYBE somebody asks if he had #red hair when he was little (i don’t think he did but again. would need to do some unhinged baby picture googling sorry) #it will be a detail literally just for me to call back to this because i am SO set on the actual moment of realization being connor’s reveal #that maybe you beautiful readers when this exists (never) would be able to see it because hopefully by that time you will have forgotten #but it will be maybe some foreshadowing because brandon certainly was not a redhead and i think his mom is maybe blond? so strawberry girl #he also looks insanely like brayden point lite here & it is just. adam lowry brayden point connor dewar copy paste bold italics sans serif #connor dewar #toronto maple leafs #but i think sleep-deprived connor gets a little scruffy with a newborn… suddenly OH ENEKWNIDKW NOOOO THAT CANNOT HAPPEN I couldn’t even #finish the sentence in my head i was like wait if he has a baby does that make him. does he get dilf power? and while technically he would #be a dad and i think it would be funny to have like. kniesy or somebody treat him like a fatherly-ish figure and be like well of course you #have your shit figured out you have a BABY the universe doesn’t just send wishbabies to anybody and then everyone else is like uhhhh buddy. #the universe very much sends wishbabies to people who do NOT have their shit figured out like yeah most people plan and prepare for it but #more often than not wishbabies are born out of such a strong desire and longing just this raw WANTING for something so bad that you make a #life out of it like. you have to want it so bad and somewhere in that Toronto locker room somebody has had a magic wish baby before and is #keeping their mouth SO shut. like. amatts secret baby maybe? y’all like that one i think. also because it’s my narrative & i do what i want #tyler dylan wish baby because i want to give Dylan that. also tyler and his baby are soooo 😭😭😭🥹 #but i’m going to be mean to dewey for a second and say this is a certified frog moment 🐸 the little 👅 like ok bud sure!! creature narrative #not a single thought behind his eyes (beloved) and i am just watching it loop & thinking about him actively choosing to be so clean shaven #& the ritual of him shaving & making that horny. brandon scruffy in the doorway watching the razor move across his cheeks & jaw & rubbing a #thumb over the soft skin pressing close enough to smell him & kiss the faint taste of soap at the curve of his jaw #it is very much a competent hands kink kinda thing but now ALSO connor’s stubble growing back fast rough against brandon’s palm by the end #of the day & the ritual to it that in the morning he’ll wake up & connor will be scrubbed pink & warm & smell of the faintest spice that #brandon will be able to pick up for HOURS lingering behind his ear lobe & I haven’t decided straight razor or not but also this entire time #my brain has been like yes ofc at some point connor shaves brandon & this look of concentration in the gif happens unconsciously tonguing

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post trade deweys wish baby except it’s twins and they both get one and don’t realize the new babies are actually twin babies for an embarrassing amount of time (to be fair to them settling into a brand new place while heartbroken and pining is stressful enough without single parenting a newborn)

i want it so bad i might cry actually

#oh NO I’M ACTUALLY OBSESSED WITH THIS I LOVE WISHBABIES PLEASEEEEEE AND FOR THEM TO BE TWINS IS DEVASTATING TO MEEEEE #also because the avs and tor locker rooms would be fun to give babies (i am not a hater of both of those teams sometimes. colorado depends) #blood feud & all but please who will do this for us. it can’t be me i’ve filled my portion of baby-involved quota this cannot be my niche #but like. i NEED there to be miscommunication too like dewey1 and or 2 not answering the phone and sounding exhausted and the other thinks #they don’t want to talk to them anymore they’re not still together they don’t want to be in this relationship or they found someone else #but no!!!! it’s just that they’re exhausted!!!! bonus points if there’s a new TEAMMATE WHO BABYSITS FOR THEM AND THEY HEAR THEM IN THE BACK #AND THEY HAVE TO SAY HEY I GOTTA GO THEY’RE CALLING ME AS IN THEY HAVE THE BABY THE BABY NEEDS SOMETHING the teammate’s been there a lot #AND THE OTHER ONE DOESN’T KNOW ABOUT THE BABY!!!! THEY THINK THEY’RE GETTING SLOWLY REPLACED AND YEAH MAYBE THEY NEVER PUT A NAME ON IT BUT #THAT *HURTS* TO NOT EVEN HAVE THE GRACE OF A GOODBYE to have to pretend like maybe it didn’t mean anything or that they were just friends #and it’s NOTTTTTTTT oh i’m obsessed i am breaking my own heart. i want it to be slow and subtle and then all at once i want something #incriminating oh my god i want whoever it is to have the baby and hand it to them while they’re still on the phone on speaker but stepped a #foot away and to quietly say i love you to the baby in the softest voice you’ve ever heard while the other is still on the line breathing #doing their best not to feel their heart breaking because they only said i love you once & (sorry that i do diagnose brandon with unhinged #longing disease i know i said dealer’s choice and i can be convinced otherwise but in my heart currently it is brandon taking care of his #baby while not knowing that connor has one too (UNLESS WE FLIP THIS AND MAKE IT THAT BECAUSE BRANDON LEFT FIRST CONNOR HAS THE BABY AND #EVERYONE ON THE WILD KNOWS? and Connor POV has the baby doesn’t know about brandon (the wild do because of course he told them but nobodu #thought to tell connor they all knew whose it was and why would they have to tell him of course Brandon would have) and so connor doesn’t #know that brandon has the baby and ohhhhh i want girl dad connor dewar and i do want boy dad duhaime but i’ll take girl dad duhaime as well #anyway this is what it’s like in my brain at all times i never make a decision BUT going back to what i was saying. brandon on the phone) #listening to connor’s voice saying something he’s never heard because of course brandon whispered i love you into the top of connor’s head #every night after he fell asleep like a prayer because he couldn’t hold it in but he didn’t want to scare him off and now here’s the thing #that he was scared of that he dreamed about it’s connor saying i love you but it’s not to him it’s not back & maybe the reason he never did #was because he wasn’t happy and maybe that’s why he’s sounded so exhausted so quiet maybe brandon should just stop calling & then YEAH I DO #THINK THAT DEWEY2 SHOULD BE A MENACE AND PULL UP TO COLORADO WHEN TORONTO COMES FOR A ROAD TRIP AND BRANDON’S HEALTHY SCRATCHED (?? because #he couldn’t find a sitter? baby’s sick? vague elements of fluff/comfort if u want but not needed) or just. pulling up in general & brandon #has lila in his arms when he opens the door because he thinks it’s his fuckin DoorDash postmates whatever w/her formula &then it’s connor #who takes one look at the chubby hand fisted in brandon’s collar and puts it together faster than brandon ever could once he stutters out #the question of ‘is that—‘ brandon: my baby? yeah stupid. and Connor’s in the doorway in his stupid blue maple leafs shirt & brandon hears #the timer go off for her bottles to be done sterilizing & just sighs & says you can hold her if you want &connor takes her better than he’d #thought but really should he be surprised about it (no he’s seen connor with kids &growing up) &she’s quiet in his arms when connor follows

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not weird. wild. outtakes.

#ohhhhh NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WAILINGGGGGGG #minnesota wild #going through my drafts to find dewey^2 content because i am finally replying to all the insanely nice comments people left on dewey^2 fic #and. 😭🥹🥰 but also shrieking at an inconceivable decibel watching this like one would think after MONTHS i would be capable of watching this #no. absolutely not. everything about it makes me want to chew glass thank u so much i am launching myself into the sun hit me w/a bus etc #i have watching the 0.2 seconds of connor’s reaction to being hit SO often it is such rich earth the shock the look over brandon’s head & #then the look he gives brandon afterwards the little crook of his mouth like i feel insane about it does anyone else see how much There Is #in that gaze. like i don’t want to just say that’s the look of a man in love bc it’s more specific than that but that is A Look of fondness #that i am trying to encapsulate & describe at all times with them but i couldn’t exactly capture it even if i wrote 100k words I couldn’t #anyway can we all talk about pat maroon’s power to make guys fall in love with him? he’s got that jack black raw sexual energy iykwim. #that is the first time that has ever left my mouth & actually I’m so right for that. like he’s hot & we all know this but no one says it & #they are all literally so obsessed with him. i remember him adopting baby connor & teaching him how to order a sandwich!! i remember him #kissing anthony cirelli with tongue in the playoffs!!! i’m just saying i would like to see it with him & beautiful spurge is all & to not #be told ‘yeah not even the freaks on ao3 have what you’re looking for’ (common L ✊😔 did that again today but bestliars ily & the spurgeons) #and then JEEK MY BELOVED 😭😭😭 ‘are you in there?’ ‘uh no.’ kills me every single fucking time i watch it &i don’t even know why i’m laughing #I don’t think I can speak about any of the kirill/zuccy parts like i couldn’t talk about the commercial when it came out i certainly can’t #handle the outtakes it’s just kirill giggling @NOTHING (i do wannna know if they used real milk or liquid glue like they do for commercials #no actually i’m not done yet talking about the look connor has sorry i keep having to re-watch it to get through the whole thing for tags & #the way that connor looks at him for not even a SECOND but then has the immediate realization & terrible knowledge that he is in an area #surrounded by cameras who are filming him he is acutely aware of perception & it’s just like the one celly where he SEES the camera the #frightened fourth wall glance & I don’t know what narrative that is but by god I am BUILDING it I want to lock connor dewar in a little box #known as a metanarrative & shake him up in it a la catch’s (beloved) many worlds like it makes me feel. i just put it together but OH that #unspeakable reaction he has is so. i get mean when i get nervous i bite like a scared dog he is coiled to STRIKE right there after showing #tenderness he showed his soft belly & now he’s showing you his teeth. mistake loyalty obedience hunger etc etc bertuzzi thesis quote here #gus trying so hard to get howdy right… them dicking around with the ball & bolds losing it… it doesn’t even seem real when gus says howdy #again. we are not speaking about zuccs and kirill SHARING one set of earphones & kirill so giggly & pink & leaning into him & ‘this guy’ #zuccs aww i need my teeth where are they playing it up for kirill’s laughs he’s not even looking at the camera! bro!! why are u so in love! #can i get uhhhh dissertation about the face pat makes after spurge mimics him because i need one thank you. that could be SO fun i see it & #AGAIN WE ARE NOT SPEAKING ABOUT KIRILL LAUGHING GRABBING ZUCCY’S SHOULDER OK MIDDLE SCHOOL GIRL!! OK!!! ‘idiota’ more like idiots in love. #and then fabes’ cute little face at the end and the absolute MENACE dewey2 is nailing him directly in the head. they all choose violence

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every few months i get a little crayzay about the russian five. and. this past addictive streak has been since jan, yet i dont have much to show fer it...

#SCREAMINGGGGGGG oh i love this so much. absolutely DYING at the animation 😭😭😭😭 #sergei fedorov #vladimir konstantinov #steve yzerman #detroit ride or die #the russian five #save me mullet girl in keds… save me !!!! #‘that’s literally just you’ oh sergei buddy #hockey art!!! #the chain of 91s makes me want to throw up thank you 😊 (beloved) (absolutely tragic) #also it did just give me severe brainworms about some kind of parallel universes wormhole multiple dimensions fic with several sergeis #there is NO plot NO concept NO ideas but i like the idea of a chain of sergeis hand in hand holding onto the past present future #like a little bit of a Bobby Pendragon earth one two three moment but also like a sergei who doesn’t experience time linearly #and at any given moment is past/present/future like would it be fun to have him time jump & look down & suddenly have HOLD ON I HAVE JUST #CONCEPTUALIZED THAT ALL OF THESE TEAMS HAVE WINGS I WANT SOME KIND OF MOTIF WITH THAT SOME KIND OF METAPHOR SYMBOLISM sergei watching a #single feather drift to the ground waiting for it to land the spiraling motion the mechanics of feathers optimized for flight ohhh it’s not #necessarily sexy but we COULD also have feather lice for a fun little time parasite moment but anyway i was trying to say sergei looking #down and seeing the wing/wings (yes screaming eagle) (the duck fits here somehow) and all of them blending together the quick moment before #it fades flashing before his eyes but ALSO i think it could be fun to have multiple sergeis like sergeis from different times all together #and it’s some kind of shenanigans with putting that to rights. yes stevie is involved of course

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A brief but heated spat | DET vs PIT | Apr. 11, 2024

#um. hello. i am Looking that second gif? chiarot pushing his head down? sid’s grip on the back of his thighs still? yeah i sure am thinking #BENNY THERE IS LITERALLY *NO* GODDAMN REASON FOR YOU TO GRAB HIS CHIN LIKE THAT!!!! i can’t. i just. i. sihdjaish. (flailing incoherently) #like he CHECKS him? to make sure he’s okay? dear god there is something insanely tender horny feral in that like the violence of sid’s #helmet getting ripped off and his closed eyes benny palming his jaw for a GOOD second before shifting his grip to get a fist on the back of #sid’s head for leverage and??? shove it down??? also that at literally any point sid could let go of benny’s thigh & unhook (unless their #gear is caught together which it looks like it might be?) but there is SO much the slutty slutty camera shot of benny’s little wrist inside #his glove sid bent in half like originally it looks like benny grabs him like he’s gonna flip him over so he can pin him& get on top of him #which at least makes SENSE in the context of a fight like pin a guy so he can’t hit you but he DOESN’T he doesn’t roll them & i don’t know #if it’s just because sid’s monster ass is too huge & benny can’t move him but then why does the strategy become. sorry nik i just realized #i have been being unhinged in your tags and it is about to get worse 🫶 thank you i love you fair warning OKAY ANYWAY the immediate response #just becomes shoving his head down onto your dick??? were words exchanged??? and benny looks fucking FERAL like teeth bared lips drawn back #& sid looks sO out of it this feels so ‘fertile omega just went into heat & alpha just went feral about it’ in the tropey-est way possible #benny forcing him to bare his neck & submit? checking for a bite? no idea but if TAYLOR even called it out & was like ‘chiarot looked like #he was about to kiss crosby’ the fic had better go absolutely hog wild unhinged nasty feral. thank you. we fuckin at center ice (mean) rip #no romance in this one ESPECIALLY not w/the ot goal from that numbers witch absolutely insane for that. anyway i just think benny should f- #(me getting yanked off the stage with one of those comedy hooks before i open my mouth further) anyway i will proceed to keep being feral #about benny grabbing his face and leaning in like why does he look like snake like he fully did the leans in scenting & pull away with his #nostrils flaring (but not really pulling away at all?) i just!!!! the second gif lives in a loop in my head i just keep staring at it like #the little. the. ok backing up first of all benny sweeping his legs out from under him & then pushing them out wider a little bit but what #i was trying to say was benny canting his hips up and the leg twitch like he’s gonna throw his left leg over sid’s hip like BUDDY. you’re. #you’re not even trying to stand up and same thing with sid out here fuckin. presenting his ass instead of standing up GET A ROOM YOU WHORES #sid not looking at him until the ref is there as a physical barrier… is he presenting his neck or ignoring him what does benny SAY because #you can see him talking at the end and sid listening like just let me know what was going on bro (unrated to the omegaverse i invented) #i still think they should hate fuck on or off center ice regardless of the universe the earth is rich the narrative is fertile it’d be fun #winner’s room? sid numbers witch winning goal getting pick of the litter &deciding to ‘put benny in his place’ (vengeance? continuation?) #like. ben chiarot known whoré pot found in kitchen who is surprised by this. EYE know how slutty this man is i’ve been listening to adri #ben chiarot #detroit ride or die #sidney crosby #pittsburgh penguins

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Women's hockey in print: The Globe (1844-1936); Toronto, Ontario 01 Dec 1927 // Regina College History // The Globe (1844-1936); Toronto, Ontario 01 Apr 1927 // The Globe (1844-1936); Toronto, Ontario 22 Nov 1916 // National police gazette (New York, N.Y.), 1903-12, Vol.83 // The Globe (1844-1936); Toronto, Ontario 04 Dec 1926 // The Globe and Mail (1936-); Toronto, Ontario 28 Mar 1938 // Town & country, 1921-01, Vol.77 // New York Times (1923-); New York, N.Y.. 26 Jan 1936

#🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️‼️ this is cool #esp with the project that i am (very unrelatedly subject-wise) doing involving print media this is just fun to look at #and now i really should get back to actually doing it ✊😔 i need at least five more pages done by time the canuck and the preds are done #women’s hockey

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it’s a beautiful day for some baseball

#my toxic gay trait is that i watch a man throw a ball and IMMEDIATELY go ‘i could do that’ #liv (baseball era) #liv in the replies #me posting this picture from earlier as i am also two games into watching the playoffs l m a o #anyway trying to be more open and personal without doxxing myself lol #but also: sitting right above the dugout was SO fun and funny they were so entertaining

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mo seider 23-24 end of season interview

#that is in fact my wife thank you #OH I REALIZE I DIDNT GET TO BE INSANE ABOUT THAT ON HERE (ANNA’S ANNOUNCEMENT) BUT IT’S SO TANGENTIAL I WON’T anyway. spielerfrau 👀 my wife #like yeah -> #the garfield hat. the hair. obsessed #moritz really said ‘i see you with the cheshire cat grin comments and i raise you another mischievous cat #who INSTEAD has a stupid best friend who’s a dog and is incredibly lazy’ (can we get lucas an odie hat) anyway the vibes are immaculate. #sorry i gave you complex fae morality when you really were just a silly goofy guy. i see you moritz (also you’re a himbo. orange cat.) #moritz seider my beloved #detroit ride or die #in the mickey flannel too like. he wants to be an edgy emo girl SO bad and now i am spiraling like mo please pierce your eyebrows. #snakebites??? i KNOW i assigned him piercing and i know the eyebrow for sure but also i want to give him snakebites sooooo bad the vibes!!! #@ thomas bordeleau pierce your ears #<- which is i think my categorizing tag? that or #not hockey hockey paperdolling the nhl #the fussy hair tuck… god i love him. wife!!!! wife wife wife!!!! cozy wife behavior!!! #hamds #like i know that girl. the edgy athlete the sporty grunge look i have had SUCH a crush on that girl moritz don’t do this to meeee #also while we’re at it i know I don’t generally give mo ear piercings and i stand by that BUT #i am proposing he wants them because he always makes sure his ears are exposed like he’s gotta show off the full lobe & cartilage piercings

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this is such a fantastic image...... dylan larkin mere inches away from his first time ever making playoffs in his entire career after scoring the game winning overtime goal against a team we've had beef with since 1926. cat's face being smashed against the winged wheel on dylan's chest because he's short. shayne "big sad eyes" gostisbehere laughing and grinning for the first time all season? moritz "calder winner" seider jumping 4 feet off the ice to tackle his captain and mentor into a hug. lucas raymond jumping 5 feet off the ice to tackle his boyfriend moritz into a hug. daniel sprong jumping 6 feet off the ice to crush them all even though he's only been here for one (1) season. beautiful stuff boys lets go fucking kill the montreal canadiens

#and when i tell you i would kill for this man in a heartbeat i do mean it. the soul & spirit of hockeytown right there baby that’s legacy #dylan waving everyone in is making me CRY and he is received with such force and love you can’t even see him he’s buried in it #me 🤝 trying to say literally anything valid about detroit 🤝 if i loved you less i could talk about it more #if i look too long at this i am going to shoot myself straight into the sun thank you #dylan larkin #moritz seider my beloved #alex debrincat #jt compher #lucas raymond #shayne gostisbehere #daniel sprong #detroit ride or die #the progressively higher jumping by progressively shorter guys is KILLING me #daniel spring? no daniel SPRONG #anyway. going to go through my red wings not making the playoffs grief and then go playoffs sicko mode #based on vibes only &i always think there’s a team i’m gonna bandwagon &then i start watching &it is SO random. 2016 jets whiteout beloveds #top by faber just came on so i will be reblogging the photos of my wife moritz at media day post haste

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Who are we shipping Seth Jarvis with btw? That’s a goofy guy and I wanna see him fall in LOVE

#GREAT question this is one i personally am incredibly invested in knowing the answer to as i don’t really follow the canes but! #in my personal opinion oh my god it’s the finns. EYE remember the xbox story i remember finns and jarvy on a tropical vacation #no i don’t know how exactly he slots into the unhinged teuvo/nino/aho polycule or if he’s with the odd man out if the others are together #but i Would Like To See It #PLEASE tell me we all remember the xbox story and also jarvy’s sassy little vlogs from whatever beach they went to for all stars weekend #also is kotka still on the canes i think so right because that’s a valid option (sorry to mete i KNOW but if only you weren’t in lehigh #you could be homoerotic with kotka again. alas.) jarvy and kotka so that i can keep the love triangle intact thank you. also the potential #here for a learning a language fic w/jarvy adopted by the finns & learning finnish is delightful as is his commitment to calling aho fishy #UPDATE i have consumed marginally more canes content somehow ??? & all i have to say about brent burns is: he (jarvy) Fucked that old man #yes brent burns isn’t actually old but he is a Hockey Old and also seth jarvis fucked him or wants to insanely bad and i would read either #sometimes you gotta be a twenty two year old guy who maybe likes to remind your teammate you were barely born by the time he was drafted #and also sometimes maybe you gotta tell him about THAT TIME YOU FOUND HIS ESPN BODY ISSUE OHHH THAT COULD BE IN THE NARRATIVE SO MANY WAYS #what i mean to say is: nuisance for menace. can’t tell if jarvy wants to grow up to be just like burnsie or if it’s homoerotic hero worship #or something else but like. maybe u never grew up idolizing brent burns but you sure can get a kick out of making a big deal out of him now #it’s percolating in there u gotta just. let it cook for a min ok as my 8AM section this semester says always: did we cook here. hold on #sometimes you’re just besties with ur coworker who is twenty years older than u & that’s so normal &ur gross (lil sleazy) weirdos together. #you know? we’ve all had this life experience in a low-wage job with stupid hours & a terrible boss that was incredibly physically intensive #like. platonic homie fucking. this part does not match the thesis of jarvy falling in LOVE (which i want to see) but i think burnzie makes #a fantastic best friend & sounding board in these scenarios. you can even throw in whatever the fuck burnzie & jumbo joe had to reference #for jarvy to call upon burnzie’s aged wisdom (i’m not even forty yet burnzie grumbles but Seth also knows how much he loves to play the #‘listen here kid’ card so he feels no guilt whipping out the fact that his birth year starts with two thousand & therefore burnzie has SUCH #a wealth of life experience to draw from like. burnzie remembers when people still had to mail LETTERS to talk to their crush & wait months #for a reply. ‘it was fucking e-mail’ burnzie says. ‘if you don’t-shut the fuck up & let me tell u how to do this do u want advice or not’) #i just think an adopted trashgremlin son dynamic also works &wherever that 1 post abt queer friend groups &this is my ‘mom’ but also my ex: #yeah that. jarvy your absolutely swagless demeanor has enchanted me PLEASE tell me more about how terrible you are at golf & want to score #& i will daydream all day about giving u a fun little narrative love story because u are a Hot Mess Express the likes of which i know well #oh also because the canes decided to be absolutely unhinged as soon as i looked at them (read: i finally paid attention to what they’ve #been doing all along) can we. burns & whatEVER tf he was doing game of thrones hair fisting svechy? like ik he needs a man to bully him but #seth jarvis #carolina hurricanes

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You have excellent tag thoughts, especially about Key & Laf!!!!

thank you!!!! i wish i had a better description than just 🥹🦋😭💕🥰 to explain my reaction to you saying nice things about my tags but please trust that this ask just made my day!!!

#me when i. when you. y’all are so nice and i simply cannot handle it without immediately declaring my love for you #the absolute validation and joy i got from this ask is indescribable #BECAUSE HI THIS IS WEIRD BUT YOU’RE A MUTUAL IN LAW I THOUGHT WAS COOL and now you like my tags and i am feeling a little shy but also now #i am very very happy and 💕🥺☺️‼️ about it and ALSO i need to find the post of yours that i saved in the drafts because i went full ham #in the tags and didn’t want to be weird about it but maybe it’s okay (it is not nyr related it is jarvy related but) #ALSO THE FACT THAT YOU MENTIONED KEY AND LAF OHHHH MY HEART warm leftovers is so dear to me they make me feel unhinged they’re in Love #also tumblr let me have group chats i want to introduce you to my friend lostandmost who has made me exponentially WORSE about key & laf #in the very short time that i have known them and i want everyone’s key and laf opinions please & ty i feel like they don’t get enough love #liv in the replies

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actually can you say more things about the octopus in detroit I have never understood it ._.

come here nonnie... let me spin u a yarn.... IMAGINE: the year is 1952 and these are our boys. noteable skaters include terry sawchuk (perhaps the nhl's most bonkers ass off the shits goalie of all time) as well as one of the most famous scoring player combinations, The Production Line (gordie howe / sid abel / ted lindsay)

nhl playoffs were two best-of-seven games series to win the cup, so the red wings needed to win eight games to win the cup (spoiler: they do win) but to support the team, and to represent the eight games necessary to win, two fans (who were brothers & also business owners in eastern market-- detroit's largest outdoors farmer's and grocer's market--) brought a dead octopus into the arena and tossed it onto the ice of olympia arena (which has since been demolished. rip.) for good luck with the series.

and, somehow, either by magic or coincidence or sheer ferocious dedication to their sport, the red wings end up completely shutting out the montreal canadiens during the second 4 game series and winning the cup. (2 games were shutouts, and 2 games only allowed one goal, which in and of itself was record breaking stuff for the league at the time). and then they also won the stanley cup again in the next year as well.

SO SINCE then, the tradition has evolved and grown and the octopus has become an unofficial mascot for the team, while also acting as a good luck token, and also as a martyred sacrifice to invoke the hockey gods' will to change the fate of the red wings when things look dismal, or we need a wholehearted change.

in the late 1990s when the team was a fucking dynasty of unbeatable freaks, the head zamboni driver was in charge of going out onto the ice and collecting the octopi corpses, and in a hyping-up-the-crowd move, he invented the Octopus Twirl wherein he would pick it up and twirl it over his head in a circle, which is objectively very gross and kinda eehhh :-/ by todays standards, but was cool and very fun at the time. so the nhl had to shut it down because there would be little bits of octopi corpse debris scattered and schlopped around the ice and it was technically a danger for the skaters. anyways people loved this bit though and so the unofficial octopus mascot was thusly named Al, after the zamboni driver, and we had this fucking thang ⬇️ that descended down from the ceilings during playoffs just so nobody ever forgot THIS IS FUCKING HOCKEYTOWN BABEEEEYYYYYY

also notably, when the joe louis arena (the team's long term arena after the olympia had been demolished) was next on the chopping block after decades of being the latest winning roster's home away from home, 35 octopi were tossed onto the ice during the last game as a farewell but also a promise that better things would come for the team. since the JLA was demolished tho, the teams luck tanked a lot and we have not been even remotely good for quite a few years due to UM, A LOT OF THINGS, WHICH IS ANOTHER ESSAY I CAN WRITE FOR YOU, but finally the team is getting genuinely competitive and fun to watch again. but regardless of this flop era behavior, there have still definitely been octopi getting tossed onto the ice because well... we love the team despite it all and always want the best for them !

🥅🏒🐙

hope this helps mwah mwah mwah

#RISING FROM THE DEAD TO CELEBRATE OCTOPUS DAY HI GUYS I LOVE YOU I MISSED YOU SO MUCH 😭😭😭 #detroit ride or die #update i so lied i missed it but i do love all of you. izzy please look away im sorry i'm gonna ramble life update in your tags sorry #also will you write the JLA haunting essay because i have an unhinged fic idea about that that's been percolating for literal years #otherwise known as the sentient stadiums au in my tags and if i read erpenbeck's heimsuchung that also might get me to finally write it #(i'm lying btw. it 1000% will not get written in the next forever but i WILL daydream about it and lovingly soak up all the lore idk yet) #ANYWAY #so like. if i had a nickel for every time i took an extended break from tumblr and then came back with a broken finger i’d have two nickels #which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice in the span of like. three months #also i made a decision about future education (*** ******) and cried like. every day for two weeks about it lmao but i am going to ***!!! #if you ask nicely i will give you the first asterisks but will not be doxxing myself with the second one you likely could maybe guess by no #also i promise i will be less dead in the future. it also helps i watched nothing but college hockey for like. two weeks in the middle #and went to a lot of games because live love ncaa tournament. have a fun picture of me OH ALSO LIFE UPDATE i went to three concerts lol #anyway that was relevant bc there is a picture of me fully in an Outfit at a concert waiting for the opener with my phone up to my ear #listening to the radio broadcast of the hockey game because I couldn’t be watching it & simultaneously had three people texting me updates #without me asking 😭 #anyway. time to cry myself to sleep about the legacy and the sacrifice of the octopus and that it was originally with montreal who we beat #TWICE!! when we had to!!! on the day!!! time is a flat circle in detroit #and maybe a cruelty of narrative and fate to be so close to have done everything right and still not succeed #dylan i am kissing your spirit of detroit anointed martyr forehead so gently i love you i'm sorry

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Okay but you need to hear the actual noises Oshie was making during his team spankathon.

#OH MY GOD THOSE ARE MY F R E A K S WHOM I LOVE SO MUCH 😭😭😭😭 TJ BELOVED #i do in fact agree the noises are so necessary. i saw this w/o sound AND w/ sound on twitter & lost my shit both times & here i am again #also did bawl my eyes out watching the tj1k video with how much i love him and it did start right when he did his sprint to kiss the cup #which always gets me. the sheer unabashed joy of tj oshie oh shut the FUCK up i am not making a ross gay poem edit for him i can’t i’ll cry #the entire time i CAN’T brain please don’t do this to me. what if i ask so nicely if we could like. be horny & finish a fic from the zine #one time i said tj oshie was the caps bicycle and i was so right for that #desperately want to know what all they had to bleep out 😭😭😭 what was too freaky for the caps to post it’s like. five second chunks too #the ‘HEYYYYEYYEYEYEY’ yelling after tom goes & tj skates away because he thinks he’s done is KILLING me & then he looks back & is delighted #tom circling back around to watch and observe… truly i can say nothing in the face of those noises. freaks. all of them. so dearly beloved. #he would’ve just stood there waiting for the entire team to run him through is the thing too the way he triple checks like nobody? nobody? #before he finally skates off 😭 tj PLEASE we all know anyway but really it’s my fault for not thinking you could be louder about it #tj oshie #tom wilson #alexander ovechkin #nic dowd #and the thing is just i love him too much that there are too many poems i could give him. but there might be a file started. #deep cuts from the draft dumpster dives #I’M NOT ACTUALLY HERE BUT I WILL BE TOMORROW I PROMISE I INTEND TO ANSWER ALL MY MESSAGES AND POST FOR REAL it has been a. week. yeah. #also i just Ugly Cried at 1AM about tj AGAIN because i love him so much and i saw the tj1k no bad days like oh BUDDY nicke? holts? weeping.

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There's Only One You 2024 (a sports rpf short fanwork challenge)

Tired of trying to finish your 45k fic on your 30 minute lunch break? Getting bogged down by portraiture that takes over 12 hours to complete? Want to record a podfic that takes exactly as long as the intermission break? Presenting: There’s Only One You - a sports rpf short fanwork prompt meme. Year 2!

All fanworks + all sports rpf welcome.

Prompt format: 1 pairing + 1 word.

Fanwork fills have maximum length: Fic: 2000 words // Podfic: 20 minutes // Fanart: 2 hours of effort // Playlists: 10 songs // Vids: 2 minutes // something else? follow those guidelines!

☀️ Schedule ☀️ Prompts open: Now!! Posting opens: March 13 Prompts close: March 20 Posting closes: April 4 Fanworks revealed: April 5 Creators revealed: April 8

INFO.

FAQ.

RULES.

Questions? Ask on tumblr or email [email protected].

Art by the amazing @sorrellegiance!! Thank you Sor 🥳🥳

Changes this year:

#i did this last year because i was POSSESSED by one of the prompts & it was so much fun & i just 🥹 #first real fic i ever posted 🥲 i want to do it again i think because i have learned i write SO much better when i have Consequences #anyway catch me submitting 50 (max) prompts for all my rarepairs. where is the connor/wemby. luka/miro. give me crosssport or give me death #also just like. my regular hockey pairs lmao i have so many #we will see if i can overcome the horrors & do it again this year but i will be reading it if not (have i read all of them from last year…) #it may not look like it but i queue #REMINDER TO SUBMIT PROMPTS BRO I KNOW YOU’RE GONNA FORGET <- me @ future me