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em0uvante · 3 years

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Amaranthine

Chapter three

TRIGGER WARNING:

- MENTIONS OF DEATH

- VIOLENCE

I love you all, enjoy.

"remember the sorting hat ceremony bubba?" i ask draco, interrupting his boring lecture. he grunts, ending his sentence.

"asshole, but yeah, i do. what about it?" he mutters the beginning, gradually getting louder.

"i don't know, i just want to go back. i miss it." i huff, laying my head on draco's lap.

"but we still go to this school? what do you mean?" he pets my hair gently, making sure not to pull on it.

"i don't know. i guess i want to go back in time, before everything went in the gutter." my eyes well up with tears which i pat away with my palms.

draco lifts me off his lap into his arms, holding me tightly. i quickly wipe my tears on his clothed shoulder. i sit back up. draco takes my chin in between his index finger and thumb, staring into my eyes. his soft lips meet my cheek, cooling my nerves. i let out a prolonged sigh, eyes closing shut.

"it's over now annie, you're safe know. i'll never leave your side. promise." draco holds out his pinky finger, i take it in mine. our foreheads meet, resting against each other.

"sorry i got your shirt all wet." i sniffle waiting for draco to reply.

"i wasn't gonna say anything because you're sad, but yeah, pretty gross." we share a low chuckle, draco pokes at my side. i squirm myself off his lap, falling to the floor. draco only points his finger and laughs.

"you are so mean! ugh, why do i have to live with you?" i shout from the floor, draco holding out his hand to pick me up.

"well, i have to go to potions, and you need to get yourself to herbology. walking with me or not annie?" he slides his robes on, waiting for an answer.

"yeah, i'll walk with you. but only because you have no other friends." i stick my tongue out at him, face contorting in a confused manner.

"says you! i'm your only friend you prune," he remarks stubbornly. "and for your information, i have blaise, and- um..." draco trails off while i collect my belongings for class. i shake my head at him, chuckling to myself. i hear a subtle knock on the door. my eye rests against the peephole.

"hey mister popular, astoria greena- i mean uh astoria greengrass. she's behind the door, waiting for you."

"oh! i didn't know she was stopping by." he scrambles to ruffle out his hair. my eyes roll to the back of my head out of disgust. astoria greenass has draco wrapped around her finger.

the pair met when they were put together for a potions project last year. he was amazed by her beauty, and fell head over heels in love with her. this is what i assume, of course. they have been inseparable since. i'm not sure why, but i really really hate astoria.

"your hair looks fine bubba." i say, peeking my head out of the bathroom where i was hiding from the devil herself.

"don't call me bubba! astoria is here!" he whisper-shouts, opening the door for astoria. draco's pale complexion lights up when he sees astoria's. i feel a wave of heat flows down my spine. her presence ignites a strong fire inside of me.

astoria is wearing her robe, tie, and her long brown locks are tied with a emerald colored ribbon. i don't know why draco fancies astoria to such extent. although, her lack of personality and gorgeous genes are probably enough for him.

"pepperpup! i missed you so much!" draco engulfs her into a hug, astoria wrapping her arms around his shoulders.

"aw i missed you as well babe." she replies, kissing his cheek softly. i notice draco's face turn beet red when her lips touch his upper jaw bone.

"babe? i didn't know you guys were snogging! good thing draco got headgear when he did." i wittily interrupt. their heads whip around towards the couch, huffing at my comment.

"we're no-"

"indeed we are. we have been for a month today." she grins, pulling draco into her arms for the second time today. draco's face goes blank, his eyes glued to my hands. which were fiddling with the snake ring on my left middle finger.

"oh really? that's so cool! i'm thrilled for you both," i manage to mutter out, counting down from fifty in my head to control my growing rage. "anyway, i have to go to class. have a good day you two. i'll see you tomorrow for the quidditch game." i quickly gather my bag and sprint out the door, slamming it behind me.

(ONE HOUR AND FORTY-SEVEN MINUTES LATER)

"are you feeling alright darling? you look, sickly." my friend aera asks. her hand caresses mine in a soothing manner, snapping me back into reality.

"yeah! i'm good. wanna grab something to eat? i'm starving." aera's fingers stop and her face holds an unconvinced look. aera is far too intelligent to believe my lies.

"do you think i'm a bloody imbecile? i insist you tell me what dilemma you are facing this instance." she states, all whilst lacing her shoes to go to dinner.

"no i don't, but there is nothing wrong with me aera. really." she raises her eyebrow quizzically. her alluring eyes stare deeply into my soul, searching for the truth. aera's head slowly turns as the rest of her body goes still.

"fine! draco and astoria are dating but i hate her stupid brat face! ugh, i hate her so much!" i scream, allowing anyone in the common room to hear.

"divulge me in your problems. toni, why do you loathe her to such extent?"

"i literally have no idea. maybe because draco is obsessed with her, and is a dickhead to me when she is around. or because draco calls her pepperpup, god that's so stupid. pepperpup, like she's a fucking dog. i'm sorry, excuse my language, they just make me so angry!" my feelings pour out into the world while i scream my lungs out. aera just stays silent and nods her head, waiting for me to finish.

"thank you for sharing with me. let's head to dinner." she takes my hand in hers and leads me to the great hall, which is jam-packed full of ravenous students.

"can we eat in your dorm? i don't want to sit by him tonight." i ask, hiding my face in the beanie i'm wearing.

"i'm afraid not hun. besides, i have a date tonight. goodbye!" with that, aera is gone like the wind. just like that i'm standing by myself in the middle of the great hall.

i try my best to be discreet while getting my dinner plate. ham, carrots, a bun and some mash are what i grab to eat. after gathering my food, i eat it as fast as possible making sure not to draw attention to myself. i hear blaise call my name, meaning draco was near. i turn my head to the person next to me, pretending to be in a conversation.

as i'm trying to 'converse' with the girl next to me, i feel a harsh tap on my shoulder. i look up to find blaise zabini roughly tapping me, signaling for me to sit with them. them being blaise, pansy, astoria, and draco.

"nettie! come on and sit with us mate! draco won't stop asking for you." he mumbles the last part so only i could hear. i shrug, pick up my plate and walk over to the group. draco's glum expression lights up, his eyes filling with joy.

"nice to see you again antoinette! we were just chatting about the quidditch game tomorrow. ravenclaw versus slytherin! should be a good one." astoria states, her bright smile never dropping. i ball my fist when i hear my full name come out of her mouth.

"don't ever call me antoniette you dumb bitch!" i shout, standing up from my seat. my hand nearly collides with her face, but someone's hand stops it. draco's eyes bore into mine, telling me to calm down. i let my hand fall back to my side, the same angry expression plasters my face.

"i-i'm sorry, i didn't know! i swear!" astoria cries, pansy holding her tightly. the disappointed face on pansy grows.

"if you didn't know, maybe you could have fucking asked! did you not notice the fact that nobody around calls me fucking antoinette!?! jesus christ astoria, are you that fucking stupid!?!" i scream, tears spilling from astoria's eyes. i feel like i could punch a hole into the earth with my one fist.

"oh my god toni, take a rest. you sound fucking crazy." blaise says calmly, only fueling my fire more. i hate that word, hate it. draco knows that. i tilt my head to the side, thinking of all the ways i could kill everyone at this table. draco clears his throat, finally stepping in.

"annie, let's go to our room. i'm growing very sleepy. come on darling." he takes my hand in his, but i pull back from him.

"are you fucking joking? i will tie your brain stem to your shoe laces, you stupid fucking idiot. god, why are you friends with such brain dead morons? call me crazy again zabini, do it. i dare you. come on, little bitch, do it! i'll kill yo-" draco looks at me again, signaling that he needs me to leave with him.

"what, you can't take being called crazy? astoria didn't know any better! what, are you mental?"

"blaise, enough! i can't believe how fucking childish you're being right now. fucking prick." draco shouts at him, blaise flinching at his harsh words. i'm already halfway across the great hall, taking my plate with me. draco runs to catch up with me, not looking behind himself once.

(12 MINUTES LATER)

"annie, you okay in there? i'm sorry about what blaise said. it was out of hand." draco knocks on the door gently. three knocks. just like mum. i hate when he does that.

i'm crying when draco started knocking on the bathroom door. i quickly wipe my eyes and let myself out. i sit down on the satin green couch.

"i'm completely fine draco. it was my fault. i'm a horrible monster, just like mother said." i state calmly, grabbing my wand polish. draco shakes his head and sits down next to me.

"don't be like that annie. don't try to hide your feelings from me." he takes the wand polish from my hand. i give my attention to him, which i know is what he wanted.

"she didn't deserve that. i know she didn't mean any harm. she's a real sweetheart. i'm just an asshole." i admit, twirling a piece of hair between my fingers.

"you're not an asshole, annie. you can't control it. i know that, they don't."

"that's beside the point. i'm a bad person. that's the truth and it always fucking will be. astoria did nothing wrong." i get up, pacing around the room.

"she triggered you, whether she meant it or not." draco grumbles, pulling his hair loosely.

"it's fine. it's over now. i'm going back to my room." i get up and head out.

"annie, don't go. we need to talk." he mumbles, standing up from his spot on the couch.

"draco there's nothing to talk about. you and astoria are dating, you didn't tell me, and your friends are douches. goodnight." and with that, i'm out of the door, heading to my own room.

(14 MINUTES LATER)

after taking off my school clothes i run a bath for myself. i grab the bath salts i bought from hogsmeade and sprinkle some in. i let the lavender scented salts absorb me completely, taking in the fragrance.

after the water is warm enough, i gently slide into the tub. the water relaxing my tense muscles. a long sigh leaves my mouth as i lather soap onto my body. once i rinse it off, i submerge myself under the water, making my body feel still and peaceful.

peace. something i never get to feel. water is peaceful. so calm and tranquil. maybe if i drown myself, the water will let me be peaceful. that's a good idea. death will make me peaceful. i want it so fucking badly. but i will never will.

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em0uvante · 3 years

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Amaranthine

Chapter two

(PRESENT DAY)

"bubba, where's the toothpaste?" i panic, scrambling around draco's dorm room. his head pops out of his comfy green quilt.

"did you check the coffee table? you always walk with it in your hand." he groans covering his eyes with a silk pillow. i ran back into the main living area of draco's dorm, and surely enough he was right.

draco and i have our own dorms, but we usually stay in his. therefore, all of my belongings are peppered throughout draco's room. half of the dorm looks like it belongs to a middle-aged businessman with an obsession with black, while the other reflects the room of seventy-two year old fairy who loves piano.

as i'm brushing my teeth i feel a weight on my shoulders. "back away you rancid hobgoblin!" i shout, pointing the toothbrush near draco's face like a wand.

draco throws his hands up in defense, face contorting into a fearful look. i giggle, toothpaste violently spraying out of my mouth.

"get on your knees and tell me you love me." i cackle, quoting the best muggle cinematic masterpiece ever. draco shakes his head, sticking his tongue out like a child.

"i'm gonna give you to the count of ten to get your ugly, yellow, no good keister off my property before i pump your guts full of lead." i make loud pew noises, moving my toothbrush with the sounds. he clasps his chest and dramatically falls to the ground, "writhing" in pain.

"oh! you've shot me! someone help! please, help-" he whispers faintly before i attack him with tickles.

"you will never win this battle bubba, i will always stand victorious!" i shout, halting my tickling actions to put my hands on my hips heroically. draco takes this opportunity to give me a taste of my own medicine. this causes me to shriek out in hysteria. i'm kicking and screaming as he mercilessly tickles me until my eyes are streaming tears.

our neighbors must hate us. i don't really mind.

"st-stop draco please! ahHhH! stop you evil ferret!!" my arms finally regain strength so i slyly take my wand out of my thigh high sock, pressing it firmly to draco's throat. his head gently hits the carpet and i chuckle, throwing my head back like the villain in a film.

"did you really think you could ever, ever defeat me in anything bubba? every single time you challenge me, i win. you will never, ever win. the day you beat me in a competition will be the day i am six feet under the fucking ground. so give up love." i daunt quietly. he whines, squirming underneath me.

"oh my god annie, always so competitive. and by the way, i beat you in a game of chess when we were seven. proudest day of my life." he wipes a fake tear away from his chiseled cheekbone. i thump his head with my palm and get back up from my place.

"you're so stupid." i mumble as i continue brushing my teeth. draco gets up and walks to the dresser to grab new clothes before running back into the bathroom.

"should i shower? i'm not sure." he waves his armpit in my face, chuckling at his own actions. rage fills my body and i slam my toothbrush down. i grab my wand and cast draco's favorite spell to use on others.

"tarantallegra." i cast nonchalantly, walking out of the bathroom to the dresser. i don't think draco notices what i did until his legs began wobbling, twisting and turning his slim body off the rails. he looks like an uncoordinated octopus.

"annie, you are vicious. it's admirable. but, stop this right now before i-"

"before you what, chase after me?" i laugh manically, slapping my hands on my thighs.

"you are horrible woman!" draco shouts as i change my clothes.

"i know. it's my favorite quality about myself." i respond, straightening down my skirt with one hand.

(THIRTY MINUTES LATER)

"antoinette, annie, ann, toni, nettie, please cast the counter-spell already, i'm dying." draco whines while i switch my writing quill with a new one.

i walk over to draco who is attempting to calm down his legs by holding them down with his hands.

"don't call me antoinette lucius." i smile, knowing he hates being called lucius as much as i hate being called antoinette.

"you little boggart." he mumbles, believing i didn't hear him. i whip around, sitting myself down on his lap. i lay my head on his shoulder, humming a quiet song.

"bubba, do tell. do you recall the faithful day a year or two back when hermione granger nearly broke your nose? shall i recreate those events?" draco shivers at the thought of being punched by her. "n-no. but i seriously need to get to class. please annie, i'll do anything," he catches the growing smirk on my face. "except let you call me lucius." i tap a finger on my chin, thinking of what i would like.

"finite incantatem." i mumble, walking away from draco due to my thinking. my eyes light up when i finally think of what i want from this boy.

"thank you thank you thank you annie! so, what would you like from me?" he hugs me tightly, lifting my small frame from the floor.

"i want you to carry me from class to class for two weeks and three days." draco's happy expression crumbles as a smirk emerges from mine.

"no no no no choose something else, please!"

"yet bubba, you said anything. so get ready, the great hall opens in exactly twenty seven minutes. pack light." i giggle like a child. draco humphs, speed-walking to get dressed.

he wears his usual black sweater and green tie. draco tosses me my robe while he puts his on.

"hand me my tie, would you?" i ask sweetly, putting my puppy dog eyes on. draco mocks my sentence quietly, throwing my matching emerald tie at me.

"annie, can you please tie my tie? i can't do it today." he mumbles, even though he can never tie his own. i walk over to him, patting a spot on the bed for him to sit. draco sits down, looking up at the ceiling.

"don't be mad, bubba. just accept defeat and carry me around. you'll be fine. oh, and we have quidditch tonight, don't forget. flint will be pissed." i finish his tie, pulling it extra tight at the thought of marcus flint. we hate him in the parker-malfoy dormitory.

a year ago he called me a stupid slut with no father. flint also spit on my shoe and pulled my hair. real mature, i know. fortunately, my partner in crime was there to help me rip his head off. we didn't actually kill him obviously, but we fucked him up pretty badly. i broke his elbow and draco broke his nose. one of the best days in my life. we weren't kicked off the team because draco's father is filthy rich, literally, and he adores me, so we were safe.

"don't mention that little prick. i hate him enough." draco engulfs me in a hug. he felt so horribly that marcus called me that, he was at my side for two weeks. i wasn't fazed. people are rude, you just have to accept that and move on with your life. that's what my mother always says, at least.

"i'm still perfectly fine, bubby. i promise." i can see his face turn cherry red, he loves when i call him bubby.

"i know, i know. still." he lets go of me and kisses my hand like a prince in a movie.

i check my watch, suddenly going into a panic. i hate being late. "draco, we must go right now. i don't want to miss breakfast!" he giggles, following as i run out the door.

"do you have your wand?" i nod. "bag, headband, your lucky ring?" i say yes, but stop myself to grab my lucky snake ring. i found it during a trip in hogsmeade, and i loved it. so i kept it. finders keepers losers weepers, right? i slip on the ring and run down the halls to the stairs.

draco chases after me and picks me up, throwing me in his arms bridal style.

"hurry! faster, come on man!" we chuckle loudly, surely waking anyone who wasn't already.

"where would i be without your bossiness?"

i thump his head again, resting my head on his shoulders. basking in his gorgeous fragrance.

"dead. probably."

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em0uvante · 3 years

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Amaranthine

Chapter one

(10 YEARS AGO)

"mum, look at this card i made for bubba!" i ask, shoving the card into her face.

"it looks simply exceptional antoinette!" she replies, brushing the hair off of my red cheeks.

"thank you mummy! can you take me to draco's house to play?"

she puts a finger up to her chin, and hums quietly. mum pulls me into her lap and bounces her leg. i giggle, tilting my head at her odd behavior.

"alright, i'll make you a deal," mum finally announces. "i will take you to the malfoy's house to play if you agree to do the dishes tonight." i whine, booing at the idea.

"but mum! i wanted to have a sleepover," i protest. "draco has a new kitten that he needs help naming! please mummy, i will do the dishes for a week!" she thinks again, this time looking straight into my eyes. it's almost as if she is looking into my soul to see if i mean it. her head snaps up, like she has made a decision.

"that is a deal i cannot pass up." mum shakes her head as i squeal in happiness.

"oh thank you very much mummy! i love you i love you i love you!" i kiss her cheeks repeatedly before jumping off her lap to run around the room.

"okay, we will head over there in precisely two hours. if you are even a minute late, the deal's off." mum then goes into her office, probably to take phone calls. i nod my head rapidly, over the moon with my mother's response.

(ONE HOUR & THIRTY MINUTES LATER)

after packing my bags, full of toys and games to play, as if he doesn't possess the same ones. i change from nighties to my favorite dark green overalls and a white shirt with teddy on it.

i slip my socks on while humming a song i learned from mrs. malfoy, who insists me to call her cissy because it makes her feel younger. the song is called magical waltz, and it's been stuck in my head for a month now.

once i'm done in my room i slide down the stairs with a wooden sled draco and i made a few weeks ago. hopefully mum doesn't hear the clunky sound the toboggan makes, she'd take it away if so.

i knock three times on my mother's office door, the only way she will answer it. like a secret password, except it's a pound at the threshold. i see her dark green eye at the peephole before i hear the lock creak open. her bright smile overpowers the look of her heavy eye bags. she pats my head proudly, as she leaves the office, me tracking behind her like a duckling.

"would you like some lunch or do you want to eat with draco?" she asks, switching on the radio. a classical tune sounds throughout our house, as she opens the refrigerator.

"i would like to eat with draco, his mum is making shepard's pie that i'm really fancying at the moment." i state, sounding as if i scripted it.

"how do you know that?"

"draco told me, cissy has been planning it for days now." my mother's face makes it look like i killed someone, i just have an exceptional memory.

"okay then. dragon sent a letter to her about an hour ago, and she said we could head over whenever. we will leave in exactly fifteen minutes. are your belongings prepared?" i nod before running upstairs to grab my two bags.

by the way, dragon is our pet owl. mum wanted to name him something french, but i insisted on dragon because it reminds me of draco, but i'm not sure why. anyway, dragon is a gray ural owl. he has is a very quiet owl, and his favorite food are slugs, which i find repulsive.

by now it has been well over thirteen minutes, so i know to be in the car already. mum has ocd, which means she really freaks out when things are not according to her plan. that's how i see it at least. mum says it's like her personal prison, or as if she is trapped in the same day due to her extreme habits.

i always ask what it would be like to have mum's brain for a day, but she always ignores my question. i don't really mind, she never really answers my questions anyway.

as i sit in the car i see her walk out of the garage door, locking the door three times, like always. i realize i forgot my shoes in my bedroom. at first i wanted to go back inside for my shoes, but after contemplating, i remember the last time i forgot something in the house.

it was about six months ago, mum was driving me to quidditch practice. once i was in the car and mum had already locked up the house, i discovered i didn't have my lucky water bottle. i simply asked mum if i could run back in and grab it, but she snapped. i swear she was a different person. the woman was cold, heartless, and cruel. she called me a "mindless f'ing moron", and that she didn't raise an imbecile. she got so angry that she didn't take me to quidditch practice for that whole week and grounded me for two months. because i forgot my water bottle.

you know, i feel that kind of anger sometimes. that pure rage inside of me, almost as if i could burst into flames. it would be cool if i could. burst into flames. i think it would feel peaceful, knowing my body is being burnt to a crisp. like a phoenix. i want to be a phoenix sometimes.

as we drive i tell my mum about my desire to be a phoenix, and she tells me that my dad was like a phoenix. all thoughts inside my head came to a halt as my mother never speaks of him. i remember seeing him one day, and not the other. he had black eyes with dark curly hair. he always dressed in a suit, but never left the house. him and mum always argued in the living room, which was right below my old bedroom. i'm 85% sure he vanished when i was three, but mum refuses to tell me. i don't really think about him, thankfully. if i did, i would be like mum.

#draco malfoy #draco angst #draco smut #draco fanfiction #draco x reader #draco imagine #harry potter #fanfic #wattpad

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