ghostofann

[ghostofann]

23. Absurdity

Let’s act like sphinxes, however falsely, until we reach the point of no longer knowing who we are. For we are, in fact, false sphinxes, with no idea of what we are to reality. The only way to be in agreement with life is to disagree with ourselves. Absurdity is divine.

Let’s develop theories, patiently and honestly thinking them out, in order to promptly act against them - acting and justifying our actions with new theories that condemn them. Let’s cut a path in life and then go immediately against that path. Let’s adopt all the poses and gestures of something we aren’t and don’t wish to be, and don’t even wish to be taken for being.

Let’s buy books so as not to read them; let’s go to concerts without caring to hear the music or see who’s there; let’s take long walks because we’re sick of walking; and let’s spend whole days in the country, just because it bores us.

-Pessoa

[ghostofann]

.・。.・゜✭・jan 1st, 2024・✫・゜・。.

i dreamt i was roaming inside a dark home, a soft glow emanating from the dining room beckoned me. as i walk towards it my vision becomes clearer. on the dining table a tender red mass pulsating rhythmically, like a hear beat. as if under some sort of trance im unable to take my eyes of the flesh, the pounding of its heart beat reverberating louder & louder & LOUDER!!! & then i woke up...

[ghostofann]

*

words by @starpeace

[ghostofann]

(Guruguru Town Hanamaru-kun, GBC)

[ghostofann]

me getting any new clothing: I will wear this for 5 weeks straight

[ghostofann]

rental

[ghostofann]

Nikos Kazantzakis, from a letter to Andonis Anemoyannis, 1902

[ghostofann]

the universe will never stop expanding

and for that i feel thankful

#journal

[ghostofann]

Making postcards

[ghostofann]

our youth friendship

我有個學生時期很耀眼的回憶。偶爾還是會想起她，國中時總是黏在一起的好友。她說：妳想學跳舞嗎？那我帶妳去！妳喜歡日本動畫嗎？「好想告訴你」很好看喔，那我們去妳家一起看。我跟妳說喔⋯對啊，是不是！這個很好吃！不用怕啦，走吧走吧。妳想去那裡嗎？我陪妳一起去。我們總有說不完的話題。無庸置疑我們絕對是當時最了解彼此的人，但這段友誼的保鮮期不過也只是兩年。只要有半天課的日子，放學後就會到我家一起玩。當時我的眼裡，她好有趣、好漂亮、可愛又充滿活力。她帶我認識了不一樣的世界。撇除那些想不太起來但不好的回憶，國中生活幾乎只會想起她。即便如此也沒有萌生起再聯絡的想法。有些東西有適合保存的時空，就算結果不盡人意、沒有細水長流，但我想或許這是一個合適的結果。停在那個時光的友誼，只記得美好的部分。我們在彼此生命中的重量，曾經好重好重，到現在能夠輕輕的提起，輕輕地放回原地，不再延長它的壽命。 後來我開始一個人學舞、帶了新的朋友來學舞。遇到了新的一切，學習建立起新的友誼。每當我想起妳，還是覺得能有那一段一直黏在一起的友誼，我很幸運。壞的回憶隨著時間淡化會褪色，鮮明快樂的記憶卻更耀眼。

如果有一天我們再相見，不知道妳會不會記得在那段我們共享的時光裡，最單純、最簡單和喜悅的心情。想起妳的時候，我只有微笑和感激。能夠把日子和喜歡的人、朋友分享，像冰淇淋一下子變成兩球一樣，是雙倍的快樂。以前教小孩畫畫時，一個大班的學生對我說：我在世界上有五個最好的朋友，果凍老師妳是其中一個唷！他牽著我的手，露出一個很幸福的笑容。

[ghostofann]

Angel

[ghostofann]

my sense of self has diminished over time…

#journal

[ghostofann]

Devon Aoki in 1997･ﾟﾟ･｡♡

[ghostofann]

Anton Chekhov, from The Complete Plays of Anton Chekhov; "Ivanoff,"

[ghostofann]

me: hey aren't you maybe overdoing it with the whole angel phase?

me back: shut up loser watch me slap my lil angel wings on every single piece

[ghostofann]

???

[ghostofann]