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hsangel64 · 3 days

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bandmates pt. 8 !

parings: bassist!ellie x fem!reader

synopsis: reader gets distant and decides to spend her time writing a song

warnings: more angst-, cussing, drama drama drama

a/n: another short one but the next one will be long i pinky promise!!! i hope you guys enjoy these as much as i do writing them!!

it’s been a couple of days and you’ve been miserable. you tried your best to avoid ellie at all costs even with staying in the same room. you get up every day at 6am and get ready to go to the gym. you bring all of your clothes for the day and makeup to the gym, so you didn't have to face ellie, you knew this wasn't right, but she seemed to be doing the same. she hasn't made an effort to text, call or see you.

you knew how she was, but it didn't make you feel any less miserable. in between classes you spend your time either at the library or a coffee shop doing homework and trying to get yourself out of that song writing funk. you felt a little productive today, so you ran to the coffee shop and decided to make the day about your productivity. you skipped class and got some breakfast at your favorite coffee shop.

you spent so long working that dina even texted and was worried at the fact that you were there from 7am to 5pm. you felt good about this one and felt good overall. as you were finishing up you had thought of an idea, and insane idea and possibly a little cruel? maybe...

you knew it wasn't the best thing to do but you thought about how much ellie has fucked you over so you shrugged it off and texted dina.

you hey dina i think me you and jesse should talk.

----

it was about a week later and you had completely gotten the song down and finished it. today you were going to meet dina and jesse to tell them about your plan. you had gotten a gig and that's when you planned on doing all of this.

you made it to your guys' meeting spot and saw dina's car was already there. you shook your nerves and got out of the car. you made it inside and opened the door, dina immediately looked over and got up and ran to you, you caught her in your arms and sighed.

"i haven't seen you in like a month what happened?" she whispered in your ear and you nodded.

"it's a lot i'll explain everything come on." you nudged her and wiped her face as you both walked over to jesse. he got up and hugged you and you all sat down.

"so please tell me why we haven't seen you."

"okay it's a long story so buckle up..."

"we've got time." jesse nodded at you and they both grabbed your shoulder.

----

you had talked to them, and they happily agreed to your plan. you spent all day together practicing the song. the gig was in about a week, and you all felt super confident.

you had all went back to the dorm but soon to find ellie and cat cuddling on the couch. your smile dropped and jesse put his hand on your back and gently pushed you to their room. you couldn't take your eyes off ellie and she couldn't either. it felt like betrayal all over again. it felt like slow motion, you heard dina start to tell off ellie as jesse pulled you into the room. you didn't even realize the tears forming in your eyes. you didn't look away once until ellie turned away and you found your eyes meet cats'. she was smiling, she had her arms crossed and was fucking smiling at you.

jesse closed the door and you fully came back to reality. you heard dina yelling at ellie saying she was an idiot and ellie yelling back, you have never heard them yell at each other like this before. it felt like all your fault, you didn't want this to come between anyone else but you and ellie.

jesse held you until dina came in shortly after. you were quiet staring at the door. you wanted to walk out there so badly, you wanted to ask ellie what she was thinking. you wanted to do so much but you knew it would've created an even bigger mess.

"hey are you alright?" dina put her hand on your back and you turned to her and nodded. you walked past her to the bed and sat for a second. a million thoughts running through your head, you knew you were thinking irrationally but fuck it right? you shot up off the bed and walked past dina to the door. they both couldn't process what you were doing so you made it out the door before they could grab you and react.

you stopped in your tracks to see ellie and cat gone from the couch and the door of your room closed. you stomped your way towards the door and slammed it open to find it empty. your breathing was heavy, and you felt hot. they fucking left, what a coward ellie is. you were livid, you didn't feel sad anymore just anger and frustration.

"hey hey what's going on." jesse and dina ran to the room and saw you on the bed with your head down.

"oh honey come here." dina said and walked over to me with her arms open. you let out a loud sigh in her arms.

"i am so frustrated d, i don't know what the fuck to do. first, she calls me "just a friend" and then she goes to get another girl's number now cat?!?" you huffed and felt the pain on your head from crying and the anxiety in your body.

"i know i know." she grabbed your head and put it against her chest, you felt jesse embrace you both in his arms and you felt so warm. you felt so safe and loved. you knew it would be okay eventually, but you wanted it to be okay now, you felt lost.

"here i'll make us some hot chocolate and let's watch a movie to calm down from this mess yeah?" you smiled at them both and nodded.

"we can deal with this later, we have more important things to worry about, like this gig." you nodded and followed behind them out of the room. you all had a great night; you had laughed hard for the first time in a bit, and it felt good. you forgot about everything for the time being.

jesse and dina had fallen asleep together on the loveseat, and you sat on the couch watching the ending of 10 things i hate about you. you smiled as the credits rolled; your head whipped towards the door seeing ellie come in.

"hey bee can we please talk?"

----

a/n: sorry another short one!!! the next one will be longer i pinky promise! hope everyone loves it, chapter 9 should be out tonight!

taglist:

@gold-dustwomxn @lil-elliesgf @hopelesssheaven @elliestears @cjrights @depressedbratsworld @amberputh

#ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #ellie williams fic #ellie williams x reader #the last of us #ellie x reader #ellie x fem reader #ellie williams angst

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hsangel64 · 5 days

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bandmates pt. 7 !

pairings: bassist!ellie williams x fem!reader

summary: it’s been a couple of weeks and you and ellie were officially together but ellie has been acting suspicious and it feels like you're together only behind closed doors.

warnings: angst angst angst (sorry !!), cussing, slight smut, use of y/n

a/n: i am trying my best to be back and write, ive been in the process of moving and i just got in the mindset to write!! I had a plan for this and then stopped writing this for a while so this series will have more than just a couple of chapters left, i'm not sure yet!! anyways good to be back hope you enjoy!!

you and ellie were doing fine, great even! but only in your guys' room. you have been so happy the past few weeks, but it was starting to feel a little off. you didn't think much of it but that still didn't stop that small anxious pit in your stomach from forming. you liked ellie so much and was so happy this was finally reality that you didn't see the red flags ahead of time.

"do we really have to go to this stupid get together?" ellie whined and you giggled.

"yes unfortunately we do, speaking of which we need to get up really soon to get ready." ellie groaned and turned away from you and got out of bed. she walked over to her closet while pouting and grabbed some clothes considering we were only in underwear....

you sat up and grabbed an outfit from your closet. ellie came up from behind you and kissed your cheek and made her way down to your neck. you giggled and squished her face in your neck, you tried to push her away, but she fought against your small weak nudges.

"ellie we can't, we have to go dina and jesse really want us there to meet these people."

"we could be late." she said in that sultry voice she puts on. you felt a shiver down your spine and so badly wanted to fall for it but you knew how much this meant to dina and didn't want to let her down.

"no els we gotta go i don't want to let dina down." you laughed as she kept kissing you neck and reaching down you back. she turned you around and kissed your lips, you melted into her mouth and couldn't resist the urge to just go for yet another round of the day, but you fought back and slowly pulled away. you gave her that look a sad puppy dog would give and she groaned and then smiled at you.

"ugh fine, only because you're cute and i love you." you let out a small gasp, ellie hadn't said i love you yet. a small smile made it to your face and she smiled back.

"i love you too." you smiled at each other and kissed again, you both went on and got ready for the get together.

----

you two were sitting on the couch together next to dina and jesse at someone's house you didn't know, you just wanted to be home with ellie. the air felt super awkward and ellie felt a little distant. you didn't think much of that until you all introduced yourselves.

"this is ellie and y/n!" dina introduced us to everyone else and they all collectively said hello.

"how did you all meet?" one of the girls asked and ellie answered.

"y/n and i have been friends since before we could remember and met dina and jesse in high school band class. we all became really good friends and formed our band, coastal."

"that's really cool, you guys all seem so close is it just dina and jesse together? some girl asked while making flirty eyes with ellie.

"yeah it is, me and y/n are best friends and i wouldn't have it any other way." your face shifted and you gently whipped your head towards ellie in a questioning way, she was already looking at the girl with that same flirty look and you turned away and excused yourself to the bathroom. dina noticed your change in behavior and decided to follow after you. you quickly made your way to the bathroom before dina could make it in and you closed the door in front of her face.

"babes are you okay? what happened?" you tuned her questions out and your mind drifted. you could tell something was wrong, you knew it felt weird that you two weren't going on dates or that she acted different outside of the dorm. you saw all the red flags but was too oblivious to see what was going on. your eyes slowly filled with tears and you didn't even realize you were crying until you snapped back into reality and heard dina bang on the door.

"hey, are you okay what's going on??" you turned and opened the door, dina gasped and pushed her way into the room seeing your state.

'what's going on, talk to me." she held your face and wiped your tears, you felt so overwhelmed with emotions and couldn't make out the words so you said.

"ellie is an asshole." she looked at you saddened and nodded her head saying i know, she grabbed you and pulled you into her. you silently cried into the crook of her neck and just felt so angry. you were mad at yourself for thinking this was going to work. you didn't want to cry anymore about it so you gently pulled away and turned to the faucet and wiped your face down of the mascara streaks. dina helped you pull yourself together and you both made your way back into the living room. everyone was preoccupied with mario kart on the tv and didn't even notice you two coming back. you sat down on the couch next to jesse and dina occupied the spot next to ellie. she turned over and looked at you and nodded her head asking if you were okay. you looked away and dina pushed her head towards the tv and diverted her attention away from you.

for the rest of the time you guys were there you sat on the couch with your back against the cushion and your head slouched. dina tried her best to stop ellie from talking to you and left you alone till you guys left.

----

when you guys were getting ready to leave you all said your goodbyes and you saw ellie and that girl exchange numbers, you felt sick to your stomach and didn't want to face her in the car. you turned away and walked out of the house without anyone, you guys weren't to far from the dorm so you just decided to walk on your own.

as you walked you made it to the gas station right by the school so you stopped for a slushy. you walked in and grabbed the biggest size, you needed this. you also grabbed some ice cream and made your way out. you sat on the curb for a little and pulled out your phone to a million notifications.

40 texts from ellie, 20 missed calls from dina, it all felt too much. so you texted dina and said you were fine and just decided to walk home. dina proceeded to cuss you out in your texts and raved about how dangerous that was for you to walk alone by yourself. you rolled your eyes and got up from the curb and walked to rest of the way towards the campus.

you found your way back and checked their locations to see they were home so you just knocked on the door. ellie answered and quickly let you in. you made your way to your shared room and grabbed some clothes.

"hey what happened back there?" she quietly asked and you rolled your eyes. you made your way to the shower but not before ellie squeezed her way through the door.

"bee what's wrong?" she grabbed your arm and you felt sick, you pushed her away and started to take your makeup off before your shower. she put her hand back on you and you pushed her away again getting frustrated now.

"why do you keep pushing me away, what happened back there?" you pushed her away hard and felt that tickle in your throat. you grumbled and said wouldn't you like to know under your breath, but it wasn't very quiet, so she heard.

"what do you mean? i would like to know. what's up with you?"

"i don't know ellie you tell me."

"I don't know y/n that's why i'm asking." you rolled your eyes starting to get more frustrated with her.

"maybe it was the fact that you just called me your friend and not your girlfriend?? i guess i missed something but i thought us having sex all the time and calling each other girlfriends meant just friends."

"i just called you best friend it isn't a big deal i'm sorry." she didn't sound sorry.

"it's a big deal to me ellie."

"well, i'm sorry." she shrugged and you scoffed at her nonchalant movement.

“i really don’t want to deal with this can you please leave i want to shower.” she didn’t pick up a fight and left. you sighed and wiped your face from any left over tears. you made your way into the shower and let the warm water help you forget about your thoughts for just one second.

————

a/n: i’m sorry this was short !! it was more of a filler before we get into some good angst and drama!! chapter 8 and possibly 9 will be out tomorrow!!

taglist:

@gold-dustwomxn @lil-elliesgf @hopelesssheaven @elliestears @cjrights

#ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #the last of us #ellie williams fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie x fem reader #ellie williams angst #ellie x y/n #ellie x you #ellie x reader #ellie willams x reader

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hsangel64 · 5 days

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This kid pick up the phone and start saying about his life now during the genocide he's just a kid to feel like this and his life be like this 😞

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hsangel64 · 3 months

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daily clicks for palestine

donate to feed refugees in rafah

spreadsheet of gofundmes to evacuate families

fundraiser for esims for gaza

orgs to donate to

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hsangel64 · 5 months

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𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕞

chapter 02: catching up

pairings: ellie williams x childhood bsf! reader

synopsis: you and ellie get some time to catch up

warnings: none!

a/n: i’m back!!! YAYY it feels good to write again i’ve been so busy with school now i’m back home and ready to write again!

“it really feels so good to be back with you ellie” you smiled at ellie from across the table. you and els decided to grab lunch at your favorite spot, it was a mom and pop shop with the best sandwiches that you’d grab almost every day after school. it felt so nostalgic to be there again after years of being away. it felt so refreshing to you.

“i know i’ve missed you so much you don’t even know.”

“i’m sorry i’ve been gone for so long.” you had a slanted frown on your face, you know it’s been hard for ellie with how much shits she’s been through when you were gone. you felt bad for being gone.

“please don’t apologize you were in college that’s a valid reason for you to be gone.” she grabbed your hand from across the table and you smiled up at her as she rubbed her thumb on your hand.

“i can’t help feeling bad! i know how much you’ve needed me..”

“that’s okay what matters is that you’re here now!” she smiled showing her teeth. “no need to be sad right now let’s eat our delicious sandwiches and then go home to get you settled!” you nodded and you both enjoyed the rest of your lunch.

…

you get back to ellie’s place, you’re almost amazed at how it’s stayed completely the same. you two walk in and she informs you that unfortunately joel is not home but will be around dinner time. you walk up to ellie’s room and reminisce on the times you two had in high school in her room and how the room hasn’t changed one bit.

“it looks the same in here!”

“of course i didn’t change much and didn’t have much decor i could put on my walls!” you nodded and walked around the room then found your way to the bed.

“so how was california?”

“it was really good california is great i’ll have to take you one day!”

“i’ve heard it’s really hot…”

“it is! but you’ll have those cool days and then winter isn’t always hot it gets cold!” it was quiet for a second, just a comfortable silence. you both sat there for what felt like forever, until ellie mumbled something.

“what?”

“i’ve missed you so much.”

“i’ve missed you too els, a lot.”

“there was a time where i thought you weren’t even going to come back you looked so happy with your new friends i thought you forgot about me.”

“ellie no no how could i ever forget about you? you’ve been my friend for literally forever. you never have to worry about that anymore i’m staying forever.” she turned to you with tears in her eyes, you moved closer to her and gave her the biggest hug. you both stayed like that for awhile, you both needed this.

….

you guys started to watch a movie together and ellie told you about her friends and how everything’s been.

“do your parents know you’re home?”

“no…but i will visit them tomorrow and bring my stuff home!”

“you didn’t have to see me first you know! those are your parents way more important than me!”

“well-“ she smacked your arm as you both laughed.

“my dads just been an asshole lately i didn’t want to see him yet-“

“i’m gonna punch your dad one day.”

“i’ll hold you to that.” you two spent the rest of her day together, it felt good to be back home.

….

a/n:

a/n: i hope you guys liked this chapter!! it feels good to be back !! i’ll be finally getting more stuff out !

tag list: @gold-dustwomxn @whenlostinthedarkness @trulygnomed @lov3lylotus @elliessgirl

#ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #ellie williams fic #the last of us #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #tlou fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie x you

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hsangel64 · 8 months

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omg i haven’t posted anything in awhile and i apologize so much- i’ve been so busy with life recently! i just moved a little over a month ago for college and just got a job and haven’t had a chance to properly sit down and write im going to try and get myself back into the groove of things promise !!

#ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #ellie williams fic #the last of us #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #tlou fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie x you

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hsangel64 · 10 months

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i sincerely apologize for not posting shit for the past week- i’ve been a little busy and i just recently got a new phone like two days ago i promise i will have some stuff out this week. so sorry !!

#ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #ellie williams fic #the last of us #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #tlou fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie x you

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hsangel64 · 10 months

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𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕞

chapter 01: coming home

pairings: bff!ellie x reader, dina x reader, ex!abby x reader

synopsis: you and ellie are childhood friends but for college you moved and she stayed. some instances make you leave and move back home for good. ellie then introduces you to her friends dina and jesse. what happens when you and dina get a little too close for ellie’s comfort. what happens when your past resurfaces? how will you all manage?

warnings: smut, lots of drama, angst, foul language smau fic !

a/n: yay first chapter ! i’ve got lots planned for this series im so excited ! this is set in june so no classes for college are going on! lets also pretend sarah is the same age as ellie like maybe one age older, so ellie is 21 in this and sarah is 22!!

ellie was running around everywhere, she was frantic trying to clean her messy room. she's running around and even tripped over her laundry basket. joel heard the boom from downstairs and ran up wondering what she was up to.

"hey uh kiddo you alright?" he stifled a laugh as he saw ellie laying on the floor assuming she fell.

"no my room is dirty."

"yeah i know....you just noticed?" ellie's head shot up.

"hey shut up-"

"then what's got you makin all this noise?"

"Y/N IS COMING HOME!!!" ellie shouted and jumped up. joel jumped hearing a door slam open and footsteps running towards him.

"SHE'S COMING HOME??" she ran into the room and pushed her father aside.

"well you better get this room cleaned before she gets here. does she need someone to pick her up?"

"yes but i have it all covered!!" joel chuckled at her seeing how excited she is considering you two hadn't seen each other since high school graduation.

"okay well both of you clean your rooms, i'm gonna head to the grocery store to grab some dinner." they both nodded and sarah ran and pushed her dad once again and ran to her room. ellie had about an hour to clean because your flight was only about 2 hours.

….

...

ellie was at your gate waiting very anxiously, she was shifting from one foot to the other and biting her nails waiting for you. she saw a bunch of people come out and was looking around for you like crazy. she then saw you come out, you had grown a lot since high school and she was shocked at how pretty you were in person. of course she had seen you in pictures and on facetime but that didn't do nearly enough justice. you made eye contact with ellie and instantly ran to her. she smiled at you and you tackled her, she caught you as your legs wrapped around her waist and hugged her tight.

"oh my god els i missed you so much."

"i missed you too so much."

...

taglist:

@whenlostinthedarkness, @trulygnomed, @gold-dustwomxn

#ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams fic #ellie williams #the last of us #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #tlou fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie x you #smau #ellie williams smau

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hsangel64 · 10 months

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what app did u use for the prologue 4 ur smau 🥹🥹

hello !! so unfortunately i think just in the US the app i use got taken off of the app store. if you had already purchased it you can go back to your purchased in the app store and redownload it ! it’s called social maker! but i’ve seen accounts on twitter where you can log into someone else’s apple account and purchase it in your phone but it costs money ! if you want a more detailed description @totheblood has everything you need to know about this app ! hope this helps !!

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hsangel64 · 10 months

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𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕞

chapter 00: prologue

pairings: bff!ellie x reader, dina x reader, ex!abby x reader

warnings: smut, lots of drama, angst, foul language

smau fic !

a/n: hey guys i’m starting a new fic, i was going to make it after i finished bandmates but i couldn’t resist ! this will be an smau fix but will have writing still in between ! comment if you’d like to be on the taglist !

#ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #ellie williams fic #the last of us #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #tlou fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie x you #abby x reader #dina tlou #dina x fem reader #jesse tlou

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hsangel64 · 10 months

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i want to do a loser/nerd ellie fic- would anyone want that?

#ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #ellie williams fic #the last of us #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #tlou fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie x you

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hsangel64 · 10 months

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bandmates texts!

while i write part 7 i thought i’d make some messages between the “fab 4” as some extras !!! hope you enjoy !

…

taglist:

@gold-dustwomxn @lil-elliesgf

a/n: please comment if you want to be tagged in the next parts because i have lots more for this fic !

#ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #the last of us #ellie williams fic #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #tlou fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie x you #dina the last of us #jesse the last of us

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hsangel64 · 10 months

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PLEASE READ IM DESPERATE TO KNOW HOW EVERYONE FEELS 😭 i worked so hard

what about the plans we made?

pairings: ellie williams x bsf!reader

summary: hanahaki disease is no joke

warnings: angst angst angst, use of y/n, no happy ending whoops, suicide and death

a/n: if you don’t know what hanahaki disease is it’s a japanese fictional disease people suffer from when they experience unrequited love. i tried to do a lot of my research so i hope i don’t butcher this completely! sorry i didn’t have this out sooner i just kinda went crazy with this-

you didn’t even know when it started it’s been so long. you’ve know ellie ever since she came to jackson, you both were 14 and you had been found after your mother had been bitten. you were alone and afraid so maria and tommy took you in. it had only been a couple of months after that ellie arrived with joel. you two had instantly hit it off and were attached at the hip after that day. you two would spend every second together and you slowly grew feelings for her.

you two were almost 18 when you met dina. that’s when you and ellie stopped seeing each other all the time. while she got closer to dina she got farther away from you. she stopped spending the night every day, she stopped having dinner with you, she stopped coming to friday night movies with you. she stopped being there completely. that’s around the time you started to feel sick. you felt the growth in your body slowly taking over. you started coughing up blood and felt your throat slowly start to close as the vines grew more and more each time you saw ellie laughing with someone who wasn't you. it got even worse when you finally got the guts to ask ellie for a movie night.

you had seen her by the stables surprisingly not with dina so you approached and decided to ask her about a movie night.

"hey els."

"hey what's up!" you internally rolled your eyes at her, how could she be so nonchalant about seeing me after weeks.

"so we haven't had a movie night in a bit i was thinking-"

"hey babe." you were cut off with dina coming up behind ellie kissing her on the cheek. you throat felt so itchy, it was slowly starting to get harder to breathe.

"hey you ready to go?"

"as ready as i'll ever be!" you felt sick you couldn't stand here and watch this anymore so you didn't say a word and left them behind. you looked back when you were far enough and it didn't even look like ellie noticed you left. you felt heavy your throat burning, the urge to cough. you sped up back to your house but bumped into someone.

"woah hey kiddo you okay?" shit it's joel.

"yeah yeah i'm okay." you scrambled to get up and try to walk past joel to get home, but he stopped you.

"hey hey what's up kiddo?" you couldn't hold it in any longer and you coughed up into your hand. you tried to wipe your hand before joel saw any blood but he was quicker than you.

"what the...y/n we gotta get you to the infirmary now."

"no no i'm okay i promise." you managed to slip out of his hold and you ran as quickly as you could to your house. once you got in you slid down the door and realized what had happened. dina called her babe, why didn't she tell me they were together? why am i feeling this way and what do i do about it? you stayed in that position for what felt like forever, staring at the wall. maybe you should go to see a doctor.

i don't wanna talk right now

i just wanna watch TV

i'll stay in the pool and drown

so I don't have to watch you leave

i put on Survivor just to watch somebody suffer

maybe I should get some sleep

sinking in the sofa while they all betray each other

what's the point of anything?

...

you stayed in your home the rest of the night ignoring the knocks from, who you assumed was joel. you spent the night on your couch with tons of bloody tissues around you. you sat and watched all the movies you and ellie loved. you didn't want to sulk for the rest of the night and wanted to figure out what was going on, so you got up and threw on a light jacket and your sneakers. you threw your hoodie on and made your way to the infirmary. you made sure that someone was in there and thankfully julien the head nurse was in the small office. you made your way inside and greeted her.

"hi julien."

"oh hey y/n, is there something wrong?"

"yeah i need some help."

ellie was at the tipsy bison with dina and jesse not having a care in the world. she couldn't stop thinking about how good her life felt right now. she watched dina dance with jesse with everyone else and couldn't get over how perfect this felt. her thoughts got interrupted by joel touching her shoulder.

"oh jesus joel you scared me." she jumped a little.

"hey kiddo i need to talk to you. it's important."

"uhh yeah what's up?"

"can we talk outside?" she nodded and he led her outside. the door opened and the small gust of wind sent a shiver down her spine, the cold air making her shiver as she only wore a flannel and didn't bring a jacket.

"so...?"

"it's about y/n." she gave him a small look of confusion.

"what about her?"

"ellie she's sick...."

"okay maybe you can give her some medicine and maria can make her that soup! you know it always helps and feels so good when you eat it-" he stopped her and put a hand on her shoulder.

"ellie this is serious not just some cold do you know anything she ran away from me today after i asked."

"um no i don't it's only been a couple of days since we last hung out."

"it's been more than a couple of days kiddo." she let out a small laugh and looked at him confused once again.

"what do you mean we just hung out..." she thought for a second, when was the last time they'd hung out? they fell into silence for what felt like forever until joel spoke up.

"it's been months kiddo, at least from what i've seen."

"has it really..." he nodded and her head stayed towards the ground. she really couldn't believe it was that long. you two had been best friends for years and never spent a day apart, what happened?

"when i saw her today she coughed up blood...i didn't know what to do and then she ran away on me. I knocked at her door multiple times but she locked the door so i couldn't go in and check on her."

"sh-she was coughing up blood?" she was horrified and felt frantic.

"she looked really sick, her skin was pale and she looked like she had gotten a little bit skinnier."

"joel i-i gotta go" she was shaking and needed to go see you. she pushed past joel and ran towards your house. she didn't feel cold anymore, her body was hot and she felt like she was going to explode. she knocked and knocked at your door and got no response, she was getting even more worried and tried to open your door.

"damn it." she remembered she had a spare key to your house so she ran over to her house and scrambled with her own keys. she was shaking so much that she dropped the keys on the ground cursing at herself to pull it together. she finally got it open and ran to search for the spare keys, she couldn't remember where she had placed them. ellie had a key holder that joel made her but she never used it, usually she would throw her keys anywhere when she would get home.

ellie felt herself start to breathe a little heavier as she searched and searched. she went to her desk and scanned all her drawers. as she was searching she came across some polaroid's of you she had taken. she stopped herself and scanned over the photos. it was a picture of you she had taken one day when you two had gone out during spring to a small meadow to have a picnic.

…

“hey look at those birds.” you pointed at the majestic bird in front of you guys. ellie genuinely couldn’t take her eyes off of you, you had this beautiful sun dress on that ellie found for you.

“he’s massive ellie take a picture !!” you shook her and she laughed at you as she took the polaroid of the bird. you stared at her whilst she took the picture, she wore a black tank top and some blue jeans with a flannel a top. she looked so good you couldn’t get over it. you wanted to kiss her.

“here look.” ellie showed you the picture she had taken.

“woah wait look!” ellie made you look towards the water to look at a couple of birds so she could get a picture of you. she loved taking pictures of you, she had a whole collection in a box inside of her drawer.

“hey don’t do that!” you swatted ellie’s hand after you heard the click of the camera.

“what ! i didn’t do anything!” she laughed and you snatched the camera out of her hands. she stopped you and grabbed you to pull you under her on the blanket. you both stopped and stared at each other, your breathing started to quicken as you felt ellie just above you inches away from your face. you felt her breathe on your lips, with her being this close you were able to fill examen her face. her freckles were your favorite part of her face. her eyes were a perfect shade of green, bright as is but even brighter in the sun. for what felt like forever being in this position ellie got up and moved away from you.

“oh! i made you something!” ellie exclaimed and grabbed a small box out of the basket you guys brought. she opened it and you gasped.

“chocolate covered strawberries?! how’d you even get the chocolate!”

“it took a lot of trading but it was worth it.” she smiled at you and and went to grab one out for you. you opened your mouth and she shook her head and laughed. her hand reached up to feed you said strawberry.

“mmm omg these are so good els try it!!” she smiled at you and took a bite.

“i did pretty good.” you both smiled at each other and spent the rest of the day in each other presence talking about anything and everything.

…

you had just came back from seeing julien and we’re in shock. you felt so much different after what she had found. she took some manual x-rays of you and found flowers growing inside of you. she knew exactly what it was and was concerned for you. hanahaki disease is what you had. it made sense, how you felt every time you saw ellie with dina. your throat closed slowly over the course of a couple of years. what concerned you most was what she had told you.

“you only have a couple of months y/n you either have us do this surgery and forget anything about ellie or get her to love you back those are your only options.”

you couldn’t believe it. you had a couple of months, two months left to either forget ellie forever or….well die. you had gotten back into your house and took your shoes off. you froze in front of the door not fully knowing what to do, you were going to die in two months how would anyone react to that?

you decided you weren’t going to spend it this way and you were going to write everyone a letter and spend your last two months with everyone you loved. once in your room you got to work.

…

it had been exactly a month since that night and ellie never got the courage to come see you again. she was worried about you but never saw you outside of your house. she would even stalk your door sometimes by her own to see if you come out. she tried to watch the gates at times to see if you were leaving on patrol when she wasn't assigned. she had gone to check the patrol sheets after a couple of weeks and you weren't even on it. ellie had gone to ask joel but all he told her was that she had asked for a different job. so her next best option was to ask maria.

"hey maria."

"oh hey ellie, want to help me feed the horses?"

"yeah of course i just need to ask you a question really quickly."

"shoot!"

"so i was wondering what job y/n had now? i just hadn't seen her on patrols..."

"she didn't tell you?"

"tell me what?"

"she's been on bed rest for the past few weeks."

"what? what happened?" she put her hand on her shoulder and led them away from everyone by the stables.

"maria what's wrong?" ellie's voice was shaky.

"she's really sick, she won't tell us what's wrong but we don't know how long she can keep this up." ellie was terrified she didn't know what to say, she had to go see you immediately. she thanked maria and ran straight for your house. she was breathing hard and the breeze was cold on her face as she ran. she felt tears running down her face. for what felt like forever she got to your house and saw joel and tommy talking outside.

"woah hey kiddo- calm down what's wrong?"

"i need to see her now." joel nodded and moved out of the way of the door.

"she's sleeping so you have to be quiet." she nodded and walked upstairs to your room. her heart was beating it felt like it was going to come out of her chest. she walked slowly up the familiar stairs she used to walk up and down everyday. her hands were shaky as she walked up the steps, nervous to see what you had looked like now. she made it towards your room and her hand was hovering over the door knob. there's no stopping now.

ellie opened the door and saw you laying on the bed, she threw her hand over her mouth, you looked almost lifeless laying there in bed. the tears in her eyes streaming down her face. she slowly made her way towards the chair at your bedside and gently grabbed your hand.

"hi honey." she paused for a second trying to keep herself together.

...

ellie was in love with you but couldn't come to terms with telling you. like every love story between two best friends, they both were scared and couldn't bare to lose each other. she took pictures of you, she took care of you when you were sick or when you had gotten hurt during patrol. she would talk about you all the time to joel and joel would proceed to tell her to just tell you that she was in love with you.

it all changed when she met dina. ellie didn't know the harm she caused you, she didn't know the damage she would cause after months. her and dina would hang out the same way you two would, except she and dina became official and you stayed on the sidelines. ellie was in love with dina and fell out of love with you. ellie still had love for you, just not enough.

she stayed with you everyday and every night after that day. you two weren't all the way back to normal but ellie was trying. she still hadn't gotten you to open up fully about what was going on but you seemed to get a little better. that was until ellie came back with dina one time to visit you, you started to feel worse and stayed in the bathroom most of the time as you threw up full flowers now and small branches. you could hear them talking about you outside and it made you feel even more sick.

"dina i'm just so worried about her."

"i know babe i'm sure she will be okay soon."

"she was just getting better....what if- fuck what if she dies dina."

"hey hey lets not think like that okay?" you could hear ellie start to softly sob and you felt terrible. how the hell were you going to tell her? you had to tell her soon.

you got up from the bathroom floor and made your way out the door. you felt so weak your legs could barely hold you up. you tried to walk back to the bed but your legs gave up on you and you fell. ellie and dina stood up immediately to attend to you. ellie grabbed you and pulled you up into her lap. you felt sleepy and delirious.

"hey hey you're okay honey." she soothed you. you felt tired.

“els…”

“i’m here it’s okay.” she sounds scared, i don’t like making her scared.

“i don’t feel good ellie.”

“i know i know dina’s getting julien stay with me okay?” you could barely see her, your eyes felt heavy. you could hear the strain in her voice. she was crying.

“it’s okay i love you so much.” was the last thing you heard before you saw all black.

…

when you passed out ellie was terrified. she was screaming for dina and joel. joel heard her from next door and ran as quick as he could. he saw her holding you and he was horrified with the scene in front of him. he helped ellie pick you up and set you on the bed after he did that julien and a couple other doctors ran into the house with dina. they rushed to your bedside and told ellie and joel to step out of the room for space.

“no no i won’t leave her alone.”

“please ellie we need space.”

“no let me stay please!” she stayed put in her chair next to you. she saw julien look up at joel and nod. joel then grabbed ellie to drag her out of the room.

“NO NO PLEASE!! LET ME STAY PLEASE!!” she screamed as joel dragged her out, as the doctors closed the door ellie stopped scrambling in his arms and turned to hug him.

“joel i can’t”

“i know i know kiddo she’ll be okay.” he soothed her as she cried. he felt his own tears form in his eyes. he loved you as his own, he didn’t want to see you go. he was so scared. they both stayed like that for what felt like forever and ellie seemed to calm down a bit so he took her downstairs and had her lay down on the couch. he knew she hadn’t gotten much sleep so he made her some tea and had her drink it to help her fall asleep. dina had come down to lay with ellie on the couch.

no words were exchanged between the three of them. just silence. until it was soft snores between all three.

…

ellie didn’t sleep much. her body wouldn’t allow her to because of the awful feeling she had in her stomach. she waited for a couple of hours till they were done. julien stayed in the room but the others sent her up to see you. she walked in and you were awake but you looked dead almost.

“hey ellie.”

“hi honey.” she was pained to see you like this.

“ellie have a seat we need to talk to you.” julien sent a small smile to ellie and pointed to the seat next to your bed. she nodded and sat down.

“is everything okay?”

“y/n has a disease called hanahaki disease. it’s a disease that is caused by unrequited love, i know it sounds silly but that’s what it is.”

“okay…” ellie looked confused she didn’t understand what julien was saying.

“the only two options she has is to get a surgery but it will make her forget all about this person, or she gets this person to fall in love with her but she doesn’t have much time. what’s going on in her body is these flowers that are growing inside of her that’s why she’s coughing up blood and she’s gotten to the point that she’s coughing up full flowers. y/n doesn’t have much time left”

ellie was shocked to say the least she didn’t know how to react and felt sick.

“so we need to get this person. who is it honey?” you and julien looked at each other and she nodded at you.

“it’s you ellie.” she felt her world come crashing down. she was the cause of this, she made you sick just because she couldn’t come to terms with being with you and fell in love with dina instead.

“get the surgery.”

“no.”

“why not! i don’t care if you forget me you aren’t dying.” you felt so sick. listening to her tell you to get the surgery instead of some miracle that she loves you was enough to get your heart racing more than it should be.

“i’m not getting the surgery ellie.”

“please you have to.” you two were sobbing together.

“i’m not ellie. im sorry.”

“no no please you can’t die i won’t let you.”

“you don’t love me ellie.” she didn’t know what to say, julien left to give you guys some space but it stayed silent. ellie didn’t say anything which made you feel worse. you weren’t going to live to see tomorrow you knew that. you were dying today and you were okay with that.

“els i don’t feel good.”

“no please you can’t be leaving me.” she yelled for julien to come back and told her to bring everyone in.

“ellie i have a letter for you. i have one for everyone.” she nodded and you told her it was on your desk.

everyone was in tears in the room. as they read their letters. you knew you wouldn’t live this one through. ellie didn’t read her letter yet she didn’t want to believe you weren’t going to be here anymore. julien took checked your heart and it was very slow you were slowly dying.

“i hate to say this but you need to say your goodbyes now.” ellie’s heart was beating a million miles a minute. they all said their goodbyes but tommy’s goodbye was one of the hardest things she’s had to see.

“hey pumpkin…i wish we had more time together i really do. i love you so much since the day we found you. you were a blessing to our family and i’m sorry we couldn’t help you. i’m sorry it had to be like this.” he had to pause because he got choked up. he kissed you on your forehead and stayed there for a little as you both cried with each other. joel had to turn the other way he couldn’t bare see this. ellie was sitting down with her hands in her hair as dina was comforting her. maria was behind tommy crying with you two.

“we love you so much and we are so proud of everything you have done. you have blessed this earth with your presence and we’re truly sorry you couldn’t keep you beautiful presence here. you truly outshined people and was a big ball of sunshine in a crowded dark room. we will miss you so much we love you pumpkin.” tommy was holding your face whole time wiping all your tears away. they both gave you a kiss on the forehead and moved over so ellie could come back.

ellie said so much without actually saying anything. you knew what she meant when she looked at you. you felt at peace and you were ready.

“i’m sorry i’m so sorry honey i love you so much and i’ll see you when i see you. i wish it didn’t have to be like this you’re my everything we have been through so much and i don’t even know what to say. i cant think of living without you. i’m sorry.” she broke down and knew it was time.

“i love you ellie please take care of yourself.” you felt your heart rate drop more and more with each word. ellie didn’t say anything but everyone knew it was time. your chest slowly stopped moving up and down. you smiled at ellie and stopped moving. julien slowly closed your eyes.

“no please. PLEASE NO!!” hearing ellie’s screams were haunting. she screamed for you to come back as she grabbed you and hugged you close to her chest. you felt so cold already and she hated how lifeless you felt as she held you. she screamed so much everyone that had left the room could still hear her and we’re devastated.

…

they had buried you with a beautiful headstone. ellie chose it. they had a candle lit for you and everyone in town came. everyone was crying as ellie, tommy and joel gave speeches about you. it was the most emotional night for everyone.

don’t know where you are right now

did you see me on TV?

i'll try not to starve myself

just because you're mad at me

and I'll be in denial for at least a little while

what about the plans we made?

…

“if we don’t find anyone when we’re older let’s just marry each other.” you told ellie. you two were sitting on the roof watching the stars.

“i like that idea i think we would be a cute old couple.” you both smiled at each other and shook on it.

“you better keep to this promise.”

“i will i don’t think anyone would be able to handle me anyways.”

…

it’s been a month since and ellie visited your grave everyday. her and dina broke up but it was mutual and dina stayed by her side for everything. ellie just wasn’t okay to stay in a relationship. she never read your letter until tonight. she was in her bed watching some movie she wasn’t fully interested in. she looked at her bedside table at the letter you gave her and she decided to read it. she opened it and unfolded the paper slowly preparing herself for what’s to come.

ellie was sobbing by the end of the letter. she can’t stand to not be with you anymore. she didn’t want to listen to you in the letter but she knows you would hate her if she didn’t. ellie had so much love you for and it was too late. she hated herself for it. ellie was still madly in love with you and she didn’t do anything about it. she felt terrible and apologized to you a million times. she didn’t want to be here anymore. she wanted to be with you. so she did.

on that day at 8:46pm the world lost another beautiful soul, but she was finally with you again.

…

a/n: WOAH this took forever because of work and i apologize but i just kinda kept going with this and i actually really love the outcome of it- i won’t lie i cried while listening to the song and writing this so hope you guys enjoy-

#ellie williams fic #ellie x you #ellie williams angst #ellie williams x reader

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hsangel64 · 10 months

Text

what about the plans we made?

pairings: ellie williams x bsf!reader

summary: hanahaki disease is no joke

warnings: angst angst angst, use of y/n, no happy ending whoops, suicide and death

you had seen her by the stables surprisingly not with dina so you approached and decided to ask her about a movie night.

"hey els."

"hey what's up!" you internally rolled your eyes at her, how could she be so nonchalant about seeing me after weeks.

"so we haven't had a movie night in a bit i was thinking-"

"hey babe." you were cut off with dina coming up behind ellie kissing her on the cheek. you throat felt so itchy, it was slowly starting to get harder to breathe.

"hey you ready to go?"

"woah hey kiddo you okay?" shit it's joel.

"yeah yeah i'm okay." you scrambled to get up and try to walk past joel to get home, but he stopped you.

"hey hey what's up kiddo?" you couldn't hold it in any longer and you coughed up into your hand. you tried to wipe your hand before joel saw any blood but he was quicker than you.

"what the...y/n we gotta get you to the infirmary now."

i don't wanna talk right now

i just wanna watch TV

i'll stay in the pool and drown

so I don't have to watch you leave

i put on Survivor just to watch somebody suffer

maybe I should get some sleep

sinking in the sofa while they all betray each other

what's the point of anything?

...

"hi julien."

"oh hey y/n, is there something wrong?"

"yeah i need some help."

"oh jesus joel you scared me." she jumped a little.

"hey kiddo i need to talk to you. it's important."

"uhh yeah what's up?"

"so...?"

"it's about y/n." she gave him a small look of confusion.

"what about her?"

"ellie she's sick...."

"okay maybe you can give her some medicine and maria can make her that soup! you know it always helps and feels so good when you eat it-" he stopped her and put a hand on her shoulder.

"ellie this is serious not just some cold do you know anything she ran away from me today after i asked."

"um no i don't it's only been a couple of days since we last hung out."

"it's been more than a couple of days kiddo." she let out a small laugh and looked at him confused once again.

"what do you mean we just hung out..." she thought for a second, when was the last time they'd hung out? they fell into silence for what felt like forever until joel spoke up.

"it's been months kiddo, at least from what i've seen."

"has it really..." he nodded and her head stayed towards the ground. she really couldn't believe it was that long. you two had been best friends for years and never spent a day apart, what happened?

"when i saw her today she coughed up blood...i didn't know what to do and then she ran away on me. I knocked at her door multiple times but she locked the door so i couldn't go in and check on her."

"sh-she was coughing up blood?" she was horrified and felt frantic.

"she looked really sick, her skin was pale and she looked like she had gotten a little bit skinnier."

…

“here look.” ellie showed you the picture she had taken.

“hey don’t do that!” you swatted ellie’s hand after you heard the click of the camera.

“oh! i made you something!” ellie exclaimed and grabbed a small box out of the basket you guys brought. she opened it and you gasped.

“chocolate covered strawberries?! how’d you even get the chocolate!”

“mmm omg these are so good els try it!!” she smiled at you and took a bite.

“i did pretty good.” you both smiled at each other and spent the rest of the day in each other presence talking about anything and everything.

…

“you only have a couple of months y/n you either have us do this surgery and forget anything about ellie or get her to love you back those are your only options.”

you decided you weren’t going to spend it this way and you were going to write everyone a letter and spend your last two months with everyone you loved. once in your room you got to work.

…

"hey maria."

"oh hey ellie, want to help me feed the horses?"

"yeah of course i just need to ask you a question really quickly."

"shoot!"

"so i was wondering what job y/n had now? i just hadn't seen her on patrols..."

"she didn't tell you?"

"tell me what?"

"she's been on bed rest for the past few weeks."

"what? what happened?" she put her hand on her shoulder and led them away from everyone by the stables.

"maria what's wrong?" ellie's voice was shaky.

"woah hey kiddo- calm down what's wrong?"

"i need to see her now." joel nodded and moved out of the way of the door.

"hi honey." she paused for a second trying to keep herself together.

...

"dina i'm just so worried about her."

"i know babe i'm sure she will be okay soon."

"she was just getting better....what if- fuck what if she dies dina."

"hey hey lets not think like that okay?" you could hear ellie start to softly sob and you felt terrible. how the hell were you going to tell her? you had to tell her soon.

"hey hey you're okay honey." she soothed you. you felt tired.

“els…”

“i’m here it’s okay.” she sounds scared, i don’t like making her scared.

“i don’t feel good ellie.”

“i know i know dina’s getting julien stay with me okay?” you could barely see her, your eyes felt heavy. you could hear the strain in her voice. she was crying.

“it’s okay i love you so much.” was the last thing you heard before you saw all black.

…

“no no i won’t leave her alone.”

“please ellie we need space.”

“no let me stay please!” she stayed put in her chair next to you. she saw julien look up at joel and nod. joel then grabbed ellie to drag her out of the room.

“NO NO PLEASE!! LET ME STAY PLEASE!!” she screamed as joel dragged her out, as the doctors closed the door ellie stopped scrambling in his arms and turned to hug him.

“joel i can’t”

no words were exchanged between the three of them. just silence. until it was soft snores between all three.

…

“hey ellie.”

“hi honey.” she was pained to see you like this.

“ellie have a seat we need to talk to you.” julien sent a small smile to ellie and pointed to the seat next to your bed. she nodded and sat down.

“is everything okay?”

“y/n has a disease called hanahaki disease. it’s a disease that is caused by unrequited love, i know it sounds silly but that’s what it is.”

“okay…” ellie looked confused she didn’t understand what julien was saying.

ellie was shocked to say the least she didn’t know how to react and felt sick.

“so we need to get this person. who is it honey?” you and julien looked at each other and she nodded at you.

“get the surgery.”

“no.”

“i’m not getting the surgery ellie.”

“please you have to.” you two were sobbing together.

“i’m not ellie. im sorry.”

“no no please you can’t die i won’t let you.”

“els i don’t feel good.”

“no please you can’t be leaving me.” she yelled for julien to come back and told her to bring everyone in.

“ellie i have a letter for you. i have one for everyone.” she nodded and you told her it was on your desk.

ellie said so much without actually saying anything. you knew what she meant when she looked at you. you felt at peace and you were ready.

…

don’t know where you are right now

did you see me on TV?

i'll try not to starve myself

just because you're mad at me

and I'll be in denial for at least a little while

what about the plans we made?

…

“if we don’t find anyone when we’re older let’s just marry each other.” you told ellie. you two were sitting on the roof watching the stars.

“i like that idea i think we would be a cute old couple.” you both smiled at each other and shook on it.

“you better keep to this promise.”

“i will i don’t think anyone would be able to handle me anyways.”

…

on that day at 8:46pm the world lost another beautiful soul, but she was finally with you again.

…

#Spotify #ellie the last of us #ellie williams #ellie tlou #the last of us #ellie williams fic #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #tlou fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie x you #ellie williams angst #angst

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