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Omniscient Reader: #1
Dokja: Am I a role model?
Dokja: I didn’t ask for this.
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Eleceed: #2
Jisuk: Damn, did I screw everything up?
Subin: No, I threw out your vote so you couldn't do that.
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Hooky: #1
Nico: So which of you is the oldest?
Dorian: It doesn’t matter which of us was born first, we’re twins. We’re the same age.
Dani: It’s me, I’m the oldest.
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Lumine: #2
White-haired Witch: Orion?
Kody: That’s right! It’s me: your son. And it’s ‘Kody,’ Mom.
White-haired Witch: No.
White-haired Witch: O-R-I-O-N. I named you.
Kody: You ruined my life!
White-haired Witch: How could I ruin your life? I wasn’t even there!
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Carl: #2
Oreo: What’s up?
Dr. Alda: Oh nothing, just thought I’d come see what—
Dr. Alda:
Dr. Alda: This room used to have four walls.
Two, to Oreo: I told you he’d notice.
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Paperteeth: #1
Scarlet: Still a vampire then?
Avery: What kind of stupid question is that, "still a vampire?" What else am I going to be, an aardvark?
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Purple Hyacinth: #1
Lauren: I'd appreciate it if you didn't talk about me behind my back.
Kieran: Oh, I wouldn't talk about you behind your back. You would still hear everything I was saying. I would talk about you in another room.
Lauren:
Lauren: Fair enough.
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Down to Earth: #2
Kade, walking into his house: Hello, people who do not live here. 
Suzy: Hey. 
Ethan: Hi!
Cherri: Hello.
Kade: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only! 
Cherri: We were out of Doritos.
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Down to Earth: #1
Kade: Zay doesn’t really understand Earth fruit. She thinks they are all apples. Watch this.
Kade, holding up some cherries: Hey Zay, what are these?
Zaida: Tiny apples.
Kade, points at some pumpkins: And those?
Zaida: Halloween apples.
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Eleceed: #1
Jiwoo: Whose turn is it to give the pep-talk?
Wooin: [sighing] Jisuk’s.
Jisuk: Fuck shit up out there, but don't die.
Subin: [wiping away a tear] Inspirational.
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Night Owls & Summer Skies: #1
Vivian: Don’t let anyone else ruin your day!
Emma: Yeah! You gotta take matters into your own hands! RUIN YOUR OWN DAY!
Vivian: NO!
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1HP Club: #2
Obi: Remember how I said Alice and I were going to have a calm night out for once?
Solaire: Yes...
Obi: Well, we’re in jail.
Solaire: [hangs up]
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Carl: #1
Oreo, angrily: ARE YOU–
C4: Fucking.
Oreo: –KIDDING ME?! YOU–
C4: Fucking.
Oreo: –IDIOT!!!
Two: ...what was that?
C4: Dad banned Oreo from swearing, so I volunteered to help her out.
Two: I think you just like saying the f-word.
C4: That doesn't make my job any less important.
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Villain to Kill: #1
Driver: As they say in the theater, fracture a femur.
Cassian: What??
Driver: The actual saying is "break a leg," but I improved it.
Cassian: I hate both of those equally.
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Jackson's Diary: #1
David: I bet underneath it all the Jackson’s a sweetheart.
Exer: Oh no, underneath it all he is pure evil.
David: No one's pure evil. I mean yeah, some people have a hard outer shell, but inside everybody has a creamy center.
Exer: There are plenty of people here, on this particular world, who are hard on the outside and hard on the inside!
David: So they have more of a nougat-y center?
Exer: David, people aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are mostly? Bastards. Bastard coated bastards with bastard filling.
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Your Wings and Mine: #1
Amon: If you guys had to defend yourselves in a house alone what would you use?
Shealtiel: My trusty phone! 911!
Luci: The several knives I have taped on my body, obviously.
Shealtiel: And you'd give them great hugs?
Luci: I mean… yeah?
Belias: I think they would notice the massive pointy object protruding from your shirt.
Amon: Uhh, okay, Shealtiel, if you had no phone what would you do?
Shealtiel: I don't know, a fire extinguisher? I would spray them and get away.
Belias: Like a squid?
Amon: What about you, Belias? What would you do?
Belias: Anything that is an oily substance and a matchstick!
Luci: You’re going to burn your house down…
Belias: I have insurance. I can say I was out of town and some people decide to set my house on fire which there will be bodies for.
Shealtiel: Why did you ask anyway?
Amon: Well I was planning on going on vacation but I think that's no longer on the table.
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unOrdinary: #1
Arlo: We can’t tell you because you’re not a member of the club.
John: What club?
Blyke: The hating John Doe club.
John: …The fuck? I should be the leader of that club.
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